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music |
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in your room by depeche mode |
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i left d&n today, and i miss work already. i miss firm handshakes and looking people in the eye, and introductions and what it feels like to be doing something important. i just feel like turning up there on monday because i've started getting rather chummy with some people, and there were lots of people i didn't get to say goodbye to, and i'll miss them all.
today on my way back on the the train this lady said she liked my eyes very much. an annoying pre-pubescent girl dressed in neon hot-shorts and a tacky 'i've lost my number, can i have yours?' shirt two sizes too tight started eating (which is in itself a punishable offence) something which smelt vile, even from across the carriage, and no one said anything-- these days we live in fear of offending 11-year old foul-mouthed brats, or so it seems. but the people i notice most are the 'common folk'-- the ladies and men in their 40s and 50s, clad in simple, fuss-free shirts and trousers, who work hard for their families and take the train back and forth, with a vacant look in their eyes. sometimes if i look hard enough i can almost sense their worries, and try and make up life stories for each one, in my mind. which one has the daughter who tops every class at school, which one has the dyslexic son, or the son who wants to be a chemical engineer? which one has taken a loan and is struggling, and which one is secretly a millionaire? which one has a spouse who cheated on her but recently came back when he developed cancer, and which one has a maid who beats their grandchild in secret? i'll never know.
someday, before i'm 30, i really want to do this (the red trail): http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Image:Route_66_map.PNG
i hope by then i'd have made a few really good friends to go with, and i'd have my international license (if there's such a thing?). for some strange reason i've known the lyrics to the 'route 66 song' by heart since i was 13, and it's bizarre how easy it is to remember lists when they're put to good music. i also really want to ride pillion on a motorbike someday, just to see what it's like to feel exposed and to hang on for dear life, in the midst of cars and toxic gas.
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