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Friday, May 28th, 2004
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2:21 am - i am Jack's procrastinating conformism
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| Wednesday, May 26th, 2004
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1:33 am - chain-entry? chain-journals? what is this?
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if there is one person you can't stop thinking about, post this same exact sentence in your journal.
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(comment on this)
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| Sunday, May 23rd, 2004
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4:11 am - did you See my Eyes Flare? ...they Reflect yours.
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The better i perceive time the more i don't want to think about it.
just like the song says 'understand that friends come and go but a precious few should hold on.' well maybe i don't want a select few to hold on. maybe i want all my friends. but that's not possible. we all know that. there's probly a pretty good chance none of you will... most likely not by choice but i guess that's just the way the cookie crumbles.
The song 'Everybody's free to wear sun-screen' is the song it is becuz it gives you slight insight as to just how unstoppable time is.
my thoughts tonite have not been a product of listening to that song but the song is a good way to help explain my feelings. but honestly no one will ever understand how i feel, nor i them. the closest things we have is verbal explaination. all we have are words. words are all we are. we all have words. don't word me wrong or i'll back-fire.
Words are as powerful as you think they are. they're also weaker than you'll ever imagine.
These words will probly go in one eye and out the other anyways...
You must manifest the world you want becuz your dreams will never come true.
i contradict.
i am.
i will oppose you.
i don't want to bother but ignorance would bother back.
to vocalize is to lead. dictate.
but those who dictate get too much attention. that is not my place.
i belong amongst the shadows, lost in the crowd.
to fight for those who can't fight.
i am the voice in the back of your head.
indirect, always.
how far will you go? how far can you go? have you ever provoked that lil voice in your head that goes against the bad things? do you know why it's against negativity? becuz it knows where such things can lead. it can show you how horrible you could be if you let go just once.
don't think about me like that.
i can feel it.
it's negative.
see, there's that little voice again.
you're not sure what you think of me but you know it could bloom into something deformed if you let it.
learn your boundaries before you use them.
this song makes me thing of... you.
if you know who you are than i know who you are.
ask questions. you'll learn whether you're right or wrong.
assume the assumpitions. or just assume that they will. o.O
no verbal necessary.
current mood:  listless
current music: they put listless on the list. i almost felt.
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(1 comment | comment on this)
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| Thursday, May 20th, 2004
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2:57 am - And if rain brings winds of change, let it rain on us forever
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this brown paper bag is my only reminder
crumpled but never torn, it protects the past
to peer into this paper bag is to sense another place
a world you were never part of
scrunched behind my back for no one else
it crimples as i clench my grip
it's once crisp texture grows wrinkled with time
rustling in the wind
the crinckled sound eases my attention
as does it ease my grasp
and the crushed paper bag escapes my control
wisped away, it catches the breeze
it's vivacious movement is almost refreshing
but it's ascending distance is also depressing...
...i wish i could have shown you
this brown paper bag
current mood:  amused
current music: 20 VNV Nation songs
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(comment on this)
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| Tuesday, May 18th, 2004
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4:46 pm - perfect timing
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it's amazing how a single phone call from a nice lady can change your day.
If anyone were to so much as look at me the wrong way at this moment i swear i'd rip your face off.
i now know the meaning of wanting to destroy something beautiful.
i don't even know what to do with myself right now.
i want to cease to exist for 48 hours then kill everyone in my sight after i rematerialize.
ignorance should be a crime.
current mood:  irritated
current music: give me something to break
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(comment on this)
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3:18 pm - MAtt was just a fad. ...but NOW he's a SOFTDRINK~!!
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i have an overwhelming urge to manifest my imagination. what to do first?
current mood: Make do then out do
current music: can't fear fear, fear's the mind killer
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(comment on this)
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| Monday, May 17th, 2004
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3:14 am - we'll regret all those things we thought of but didn't ever do
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Like Woah. i've never been so surprised in my life!! Thanx Everyone! :D i wish i could thank you all a thousand times over cuz That was Purely Awesome. i was *literally* in shock, No joke. Happiness to the max! *sigh* i love you guys ^_^ it's good to know i have such great friends cuz i truely thought there was no way anything like that would happen. Special thanx to Alanna for putting it together (she did, right?) and to Liz for being the only person in the world(as far as i know) that realized i can't eat the average birthday cake.
:) :) :) :) :) :) :) :) :) :) :) :) :) :) :) :) :) :) :) :) :) :) :) :) :) :) :) :) :) :) :) :) :) :) :) :) :) :) :) :) :) :) :) :) :) :)
On another topic, relating to my last entry; i got my guitar fixed! it turns out that just the tunation was off (AKA the lil metal things at the bottom end of the string) i Never even knew what those were before ...but *now* i... still have no clue. =\ oh well the point is they were adjusted and it fixed everything. Yayerz!
Anyone wanna have a jam session wit me? start a band? have weekly jam sessions and call it a band?
This is usually the part where you go "yeah! let's do that." ..and then it never happens.
would you say low-riding pants are gate-way clothes?
do you think showing crack can lead to crack?
why is this so hard
my dreams speak only the truth
humans are too frail
current mood:  awake
current music: silence. i just want to sleep.
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(3 comments | comment on this)
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| Friday, May 14th, 2004
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2:12 am - well you... You Make My DREEEAMS Come True!
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Ooooooooooh MAAAN!!! ok so today i went out to langhole and found a lil guitar shop that was selling a guitar kit including an electric guitar(of course), an amp, carrying case, shoulder strap, cord, etc. it's 'the whole shabaam' as i've been telling people. All this for just $273 and that's including tax! it's totally beyond worth it but the guitar seems defective. it doesn't stay in tune on certain strings and the e string broke =\ the neck's probly got a curve in it... but no worries, i'm returning it tomorrow. Second new guitar in 2 days! BooYA! hehe.
The guys workin at the store were WAY into their products. i think they touch themselves with guitar picks and strings late at nite when it's dark. *shivers* i'd say they're quite the odd ones but what I just said was freaky so who am i to talk. it seemed like they were tryin to play me so that i'd buy the guitar ...but that was *after* i said i'd buy it. and then my dad showed slight interest in an effect peddle and we spent the next 30mins standing around watching this guys orgazm over the peddle. he wouldn't shut up. oh well, i guess i sound angry about it but i'm not, i was just really bored with his post-sales tactics.
After we finally got outta there my dad had to run some errands so i was sitting around listening to the radio for a while and i heard the song 'you make my dreams come true' by Hall & Oates and i can't help it... i LOVE it! it's feel good music to the maX :D
odd thing happened about a day ago while i was on my way to Guitar Plus. it was a sunny day so i thought i'd open my window full blast and enjoy the world as it past us by. ok, so the odd part; while i was fully into the enjoyment of my surroundings my dad looks at me and says "Are you OK?" like i looked as if i was about to puke! is that what i look like when i'm happy!?!?!? lol oh well...
Me birthday's coming up. it's on the same day as my younger cousin Keenan's b-day. and Ducky's is later this month. oh the excitement. ohkay you got me. i'm not excited. ...well not for mine. i don't like aging. but Yay other people! =\
anyhoo, me compooter's making funny noises thru the floor again so i must be off.
current mood: amused
current music: you make my dreams come true-Hall & Oates
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(1 comment | comment on this)
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| Tuesday, May 11th, 2004
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10:37 pm - for the likes of you
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Do my thoughts deceive me or do i deceive them?? something's not right. i'm either toying with myself or someone else is very good at screwing with my head. maybe it's god. ...or maybe it's my fateless life trying to break loose. but i'd think if it was that last one i'd try to make it easier on myself. but maybe there is no easy way.
if i found a way out of this world tonite
would you escape with me
our linked souls will slip thru reality's tear
to where rapture awaits
in this place there will be no god to tame us
our fates soars where they may
but if your concious thoughts distract your will... Sleep.
i will wait a life time...
...for the likes of you.
current mood: i am.
current music: VNV Nation - Saviour
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(comment on this)
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| Monday, May 10th, 2004
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2:16 am - ...and what it spills is fate
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this is for creating, i put it here for you
it hangs from this maple tree with your name on it
the leaves change a vivid red and scatter the surrounding earth
the gift remains undisturbed until you give it birth
wrapped in thoughts it awaits to be exposed
your touch slowly peels the crisp outer shell
and it seeps through your skin.
you try to speak but it pours out your mouth
your movements have no logic, there is no doubt
the panting of another's breath catches your attention
you kept it before you but now it floats away
it seeks the soul who's breath you sensed
you are confident.
you are alone.
current mood:  hopeful
current music: The Inescapable Us - MAtt Good
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(comment on this)
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12:18 am - inspired by: a green rubber dinosaur
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my days are your nights
my pains; your delights
but every so often when i look into your eyes
I feel my spirit soften and gain hope from their prys
inspired by the sight of your colour filled ways
i take a small sip of your glitter covered craze
and breathe new life
this realm now has hints of an all new spice
of which no other drug could ever suffice
but just in case
whilst your eyes leave this place
i'll steal one for the road
cuz i heard this world can be quite cold
domo, tensai... domo.
current mood:  anxious
current music: Oasis - Wonderwall
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(comment on this)
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| Saturday, May 8th, 2004
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12:37 pm - This is Mine but i'll share it with a select few, i've selected you.
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i can visually assimilate you. or at least i can try. i think it works. so... so BEWARE :|
ok so i couldn't get to sleep for about 2 hours after getting into bed last nite. the odd thing is what was occupying my mind to disable me from entering those lovely astro plains... i was couldn't stop my mind from attempting to create guitar rifts and lyrics for them at the same time. i never came up with anything good which is what annoyed me the most... but still, i wanted so badly to be unconscious! so i got like 5 hours sleep.
oooOOOooooo J.T.H.M. i've just started reading it. did you know that the Johnny single comics have more in them than in the compilation director's cut? yeah, try figuring that one out. i read part 1 in both versions, go me.
So far i think JTHM is an ameteur comic done on jhonen's spare time while he lies awake in bed on those sleepless nites. but i suppose i'll keep reading it anyways, ppl think so highly of it and it shoudln't take me too long to read.
oh boy... change. change can be good! ...but it can also throw you off guard and leave you wondering. what does that mean to me? Everything. Nothing. it all depends ...on change.
i know the word fuck is just a profanity used for the most rediculous of occasions... but it can really add a certain Umpph to a statement. ...if that makes any sense.
you know what??!?! no, you don't. that's why you're still reading this.
aaahhhh, the beach. The beach was. simply Amazing. The water, the star filled sky, the sound of a guitar and a girl who sings so softly is sooths the soul. A group of friends alone in the world for one nite, warmed by the heat of a fire and entertained by one other. It was the best of times, it was the blurst of times. Hey. at least i tried.
i felt so extremely nostalgic yesterday as i passengered a ride in Glow's car. i don't think there was a single person i didn't reminisce about and miss more than the deserts miss the rain. those were the days... but so are these so i'll have to cherish them Oh so *dearly* whilst they last. To anyone who reads this: I miss you.
Even if i just saw you yesterday... it's been too long.
current mood:  nostalgic
current music: MAtt Good - Hello TimeBomb
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(3 comments | comment on this)
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12:37 pm - This is Mine but i'll share it with a select few, i've selected you.
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i can visually assimilate you. or at least i can try. i think it works. so... so BEWARE :|
ok so i couldn't get to sleep for about 2 hours after getting into bed last nite. the odd thing is what was occupying my mind to disable me from entering those lovely astro plains... i was couldn't stop my mind from attempting to create guitar rifts and lyrics for them at the same time. i never came up with anything good which is what annoyed me the most... but still, i wanted so badly to be unconscious! so i got like 5 hours sleep.
oooOOOooooo J.T.H.M. i've just started reading it. did you know that the Johnny single comics have more in them than in the compilation director's cut? yeah, try figuring that one out. i read part 1 in both versions, go me.
So far i think JTHM is an ameteur comic done on jhonen's spare time while he lies awake in bed on those sleepless nites. but i suppose i'll keep reading it anyways, ppl think so highly of it and it shoudln't take me too long to read.
oh boy... change. change can be good! ...but it can also throw you off guard and leave you wondering. what does that mean to me? Everything. Nothing. it all depends ...on change.
i know the word fuck is just a profanity used for the most rediculous of occasions... but it can really add a certain Umpph to a statement. ...if that makes any sense.
you know what??!?! no, you don't. that's why you're still reading this.
aaahhhh, the beach. The beach was. simply Amazing. The water, the star filled sky, the sound of a guitar and a girl who sings so softly is sooths the soul. A group of friends alone in the world for one nite, warmed by the heat of a fire and entertained by one other. It was the best of times, it was the blurst of times. Hey. at least i tried.
i felt so extremely nostalgic yesterday as i passengered a ride in Glow's car. i don't think there was a single person i didn't reminisce about and miss more than the deserts miss the rain. those were the days... but so are these so i'll have to cherish them Oh so *dearly* whilst they last. To anyone who reads this: I miss you.
Even if i just saw you yesterday... it's been too long.
current mood: nostalgic
current music: MAtt Good - Hello TimeBomb
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(comment on this)
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| Friday, April 9th, 2004
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2:34 pm - Me
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April showers bring May flowers.
Danny told me so. He seems like a good guy.
I almost eny their group of friends, they seem so giddy and joyus... But my friends are quite fabulous as well so i am happy.
A sunny day with not a cloud in the sky.
it brings joy to my heart and makes me feel alive again.
I never write to myself and i don't know why.
Days with clouds bring dripping sounds of rain.
I squint from the heat of the sun on my brow
I never talk to those i don't know cuz i don't know how... but i do. I only lack confidence in talking to those whom i actually *want* to talk to.
Tiz just some stuff i wrote in my binder after school one day while waiting outside for my ride
current mood: shma?
current music: nature? i think i have to pee.
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(2 comments | comment on this)
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2:26 pm - Personality Quiz = Bull Shit
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repeat stale mate
kill my old fate
manifest a new light
dissole my pointless stage-fright
remember past times like a dream
me, myself and I... create the perfect team
my dreams are real, my thoughts are fake
my thoughts are steal, my dreams; a lake
my mind ponders where imagination wanders
current mood: amused
current music: OK STEAM CLEANER, I CAN HEAR YOU!! NOW WHAT?!?!
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2:11 pm - Direction
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which way to go in life, i can not decide
go forth and venture or cowar and hide
i tried to find a pure soul in which to confide
but the whole world's been brain washed by a hypnotic tide
very few think of things deeper than their glasses
that sit in their hands as time slowly passes
they drown out the world with tidious toys
like TV and games and repetitve noise
*I* was preoccupied only days ago
with things that prevented my mind's natural flow
i tried to focus on how i was before
when my mind was free and my thoughts could soar
i slowly broke away from the hypnotic trance
and realized my life was a mind numbing dance...
*-incomplete-*
i wrote this quite a while ago... i think i'm lost in it all again =\
current mood:  impressed
current music: Drag you down by Finger Eleven(very very loudly)
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(1 comment | comment on this)
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| Wednesday, March 17th, 2004
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2:22 am - find me wrapped in glass ans slowly soaked in lime
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I can feel it on my mouth
I can taste you on my fingers
I can hear you like the holy ghost
And kill you if you get to close.
i hate religion and so should you because it's based off a book(s) written thousands of years ago by people who would believe you were Jesus if you blew on a pencil, waved your hand over it and said you were magical! Come to your sense people! for all you know monkey used to be a lil smarter and were just barely smart enuf to write bullshit for you to find and base your life off of. World Wars should be solved thru games of paintball. Jon would think very lil of me for my religious comments. People have faith in god because if you had faith in anything real you know it would let you down eventually. i hate sexual thought and so should you, it's clouds your vision and makes you do things that don't make sense. Logic reigns supreme, you all know it but you're too horny to realize it. Homie G thuggin preppies wanna beat people up cuz they have built up stress from not getting any action(cuz they're identical to every other homie G thug prep).
remain close to me. do anything... do nothing... as long as it's with me. i write journals in my head when i'm not at my pooter, they're usually quite interesting, you'd agree if you knew me ...but you don't and most likely never will. say hello. i'm 6 years old. Maybe the world would be a better place if Vegan didn't hate children.:P Why do guys have nipples? no really, what's going on there? why do batman and robin have nipples on their unifroms but batgirls doesn't? is that sexist or is someone trying to turn batman into a gay porn?
croutch down and scrall my name with yours in wet cement. Beach Boys are my heros cuz their songs get straight to the point and they did tons of LSD. they're 1337 h4x0rz. noone that reads this will get that. i Don't really either... But fuck it really doesn't matter, You took this time to listen to me. I said I fucked your brother.
There's one problem
I got brownies
From your mother
They gave me syphilis
I got no dick.
that just about does it. i fit a lil bit of nothing about everything in there. hope you liked it. comment if you want.
...or just talk to me in person about it, we might have more fun that way ...but we all know that won't happen. don't kid yourself.
Satan probly wrote the bible in order to trick you into following him and it's working purdy damn well i must say.
When you finally realize i'm the fucking anti-christ it will be too late.
every living creature dies alone.
go... go home and tell your parents everything will be ok.
current mood:  devious
current music: SlipKnot - Left Behind
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(11 comments | comment on this)
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| Monday, March 1st, 2004
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2:17 am - Don't waste your time on me, you're already the voice inside my head
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i sit, listening to moosik just like every other nite. thinking endlessly just like every other nite. i wish sleeping wasn't neccesary... this i realized for the first time; how much i truely would love never sleeping again. but i now see that if there was no sleep there would be no dreams... and even tho they tease me with things i cannot have, i would hate the loss of being able to let go and have my own thoughts uncontrolably come to life and, sometimes, even make me believe they are real. Waking up realizing your deepest desires aren't true is a feeling i would definately miss. It let's me know that things aren't that simple. wait... every day is like a dream to me. i do things just because it seems like the thing i should do. i just play along. great things happen and the next thing i know i'm in awe, wondering how i managed such achievements. but what else am i to do but play along some more? I'm going to assume that this is reality and play along. In that case you should know that you are a thing of greatness that i have merely stumbled upon. YOU are one of the things i'm talking about. I have no clue how i managed to meet you but i know you now and we call each other friends. i've done nothing to deserve this. Are you just playing along becuz you're in *my* dream? somebody bite me, i think i'm dreaming :)
They say knowledge is power... which is true. but noone every mentions that lack of knowledge is not a lack of power but a weakness. The more you don't know about me the more power i have over you. Mystery is seductive. Even my telling you this makes you more concious of my power. and telling you that makes you even more so aware. so i shall stop talking. :P
Eyes are the windows into your soul. when you look into my eyes you give yourself away.
i'll take you over if you let me.
current mood: Try Me!!
current music: many songs. but my thoughts prevail dominantly
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(7 comments | comment on this)
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| Sunday, February 29th, 2004
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1:13 am - i dedicate this entry to my good friend; Suzanne
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ok. ya, this is fun.... but now... go home so i can talk to you online! bah! crazy ppl... that was a lil to much musical theater for my liking... but i guess every rehersal's gonna be like that from now on... but closing nite's in like... really soon so it's all good. I think my hair looks a lil funny... and i'm sure hte makeup doesn't help... but what is hair anyways? ooooo look at me, i can style the dead shit coming outta my head! pfft, whatever, who needs it. ...I do, that's who! i think i look a lot better when my hair's done but once again i say what's the point... and the loop continues... yeah... don't order ali baba's pizza. ...unless you have a lot of ranch dressing! mmmm ranch. i like ranch on everything. i need moosik. Oh Suzanne... you came and you gave me a pony... but than you gave it away, oh Suzanne. there, that music works for me. *ahem* ....SUZANNE!!!, you don't have to put on that red strap tonite! SUZANNE!!! maybe i'll move onto something a lil more solid ...but not at the same time. maybe something you'd be a lil more interested in. The song perfect sonnet by bright eyes makes me want to cry every single time i hear it. i dunno if anyone else i know likes that song anywhere near as much as i do. or has even really truely listened to the song. cuz i mean, the guy's voice, in my opinion, iz fuct. but it's not about what the guy sounds like, it's about the message he's feeling, it's about the lyrics. which is why i want to learn that song on guitar, becuz his vouce could be much better i.e. my voice could be much better. ...but in some odd way he sings the song perfectly. and well... it *is* the perfect sonnet after all. Mossletoff! why thee hgkgkghell am i a rabi? a rabi that wears a BOWLER HAT! i guess i'm just really stylin! right? ....r-right? ah, nvm, i gave up a long time ago. i think i've lost my pizzaz... i'm not really me lately... iono... i liked being the new kid last year, that was good. but now i can pass by without even being glanced at. the part i find odd is; even tho i'm not the new kid anymore, i still wear fairly different clothes, which i used to get weird looks for all the time, no matter where i went ...but now i never get them, ever. i never thought i'd miss that. hm. But i guess i have to settle for a few brief moments... and watch it all disolve into a single second... try to write it down into a perfect sonnet... or one foolish line... cuz that's all that you'll get so you'll have to accept, you are here, than you're gone. Once you knew a girl and you named her lover... danced with her in kitchens thru the greenest summer... autumn came, she disapeared but you can't remember... where she said she was going to... but you know that she's gone cuz she left... you a song... that you don't want to sing...
...sorry. geez, who's gonna wanna read this...
as i said in my last/only/first entry, i need a name... i think my name should be Coy. i think it suits me. but do i actually want ppl to call me Coy? can i actually manage to get ppl to call me Coy? maybe a name is not to be decided by that of who it belongs to... maybe it's to be earned. but i don't see me earning one any time soon... and even if i did, i doubt it'd stick. and besides what can i do that could deserve a name... i don't really do anything anymore... i'm not really all that social anymore... i don't really hug any of my friends anymore... that's so depressing. ah yes, depression. oh so familiar... what a feeling, indeed. i don't think many ppl actually appreciate depressing moments... i mean maybe you shouldn't cherish such moments but still...
i love 'but still...' it doesn't *really* make any sense. i used to say it all the time. but i don't anymore more. maybe that's cuz i don't talk to ppl much anymore. meh. life goes on.
Does anyone find it weird that we're still using binary coding? it's practically morse code. isn't that a lil primitive? is wanting more than 1's and 0's too much to ask? i guess it is...
Electric guitars make the perfect sound.
it's so true... 16 just held such better days. you won't know it til it's gone. but it's the best time ever. you're probly thinking, 'you're not that much older' but it doesn't matter. 16 is over. 16 was prime. it is no more. enjoy it while you can. heath my word for i speak from the heart.
i'd prefer to be remembered as a smiling face.... not this fucking wreck that's taken it's place....
So please forgive what i have done... but you can't stay mad at the setting sun... cuz we all get tired, i mean eventually... there's nothing left to do but sleep...
You can't tell me that doesn't get to you. it brings that strange feeling you get all over, it's almost like an anxious feeling, you wish it would just end cuz it's subtlely overwhelming but it's tenacious texture is too rich to be disposed of so easily. i like how we try to name the intangible... it doesn't really make sense to do so... i mean, of course we must try but it's not like we'll ever really know what each other feel...
Pianos make another very perfect sound. *sigh*
if i died, i think, you would all be nearly unaffected. you would be in awe that someone you know died so quickly and possibly morn my loss for a week, give or take... a week. but besides that you would be fine. i haven't done anything that's to be missed all that much. i never really got that close to any of you. i would be the kid you knew for about year, he said some stuff, he looked a lil different, nothing too amazing but now he's gone.
how many of you know if my parents are happily married? how many of you know my middle name? ok ok, maybe i'm being a lil too personal. try this one. how many of you know where i live? maybe the vicinity? anything that resembles where i go when i'm not within your visual range? oh well. i'd like everyone to know that if i was to die tomorrow, which i won't... but *if* i did die, ever... i wouldn't want you to think badly of me... as in i wouldn't want you to think 'oh, he was too young to die' or 'he didn't get to experience enuf' or 'he didn't deserve it'
I would just want you to know that it's ok. i lived my life. i am happy. i have no major regrets. it'll be ok, because death is a part of life. Wether you believe in God or not, it would have simply been my time to go, regardless of if it was pre-decided or not. If there's an afterlife; i'll see you there. if there is no afterlife than who gives a fuck, it was all for nothing anyways. Maybe it's not that you wouldn't morn my death, more like, i wouldn't want you to. Just because i'm not around, doesn't mean i should put a downer on your life. Shit happens. Don't fret. i love you all. ^_^
anyhoo... that'z a lil depressing for something that i dedicated to someone... i gotta switch it on 'em. flipmode. flipmode is the greatest. Not quick enuf! NOSE DIVE! Toryuehqua! i don't need you bitch, i'm on the rubics cube team! Ooohhhh... so you think you can have my mind and eat it too? meno tinkso.
FOOL'D JA!
For those of you who may be curious about my name 'Koios' (HAHA, someone curious about my simple minute details... that'll be the day) it's the name of the Titan of Intelligence. just thought i might share that.
plz tell me if any of you think this much... or have any thoughts like this at all... twould be fun and educational ;)
Life's for the living... so check my tomorrow... we'll see if i'm kiddin.
current mood:  melancholy
current music: Hello Time Bomb - MAtt G. (AKA name stealer)
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| Friday, February 27th, 2004
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3:49 am - Me firstest entry
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hmm... this is different. where am i? *troglodyte* who are yoooou? where am i? what's this all aboot? O.o
*shifty eyes* i-i think it's ok for me to come out. hi. They tend to call me MAtt ...tho i have no clue why. it's as if somone named me. but why would someone else name me? I *am* me, you're not me. i need a name, i never thought to name myself. i *suppose* i'll go with... MAtt for the time being :$ but i SHALL think of a name soon enuf. Aye, beautifully depressing... the rat... in your brain... turns a wheel... connected to your guts and... and your faults are in me. i like Depressing things... they're so... so... some of the greatest moments... the moments i live for. i guess you could say they're... Beautiful, even. but tiz not a name i could go by on a day to day basis. i'd go by Koios but ppl might have trouble saying it... and ask why i picked such a difficult name... but a great name it is... a name of the great. i like to think it represents me to a degree... but it probly doesn't... well at least not to other ppl but that's ok.
Don't you hate it when you're listening to moosik and it sounds like the phone's ringing so you take off your headphones and wait a bit but you hear nothing so you put them back on just to hear the phone ring again just to realize that somehow the sounds from the very song you're listening to resemble faint phone noises? oh... well i do.
Yup... here i am.. look at the time... and you wonder why i'm never at school. gah... poopdie poopdie p-hants... shiggity shwa? you don't get it? hm. you're missing out. you need more fuct up friends. but if you do get it... congratz! you're fuct up! ...in a good way :P
The next time you see me... talk to me like we're long lost friends... talking again for the first time in years... and i'll be yours forever.
See you soon.
current mood: awake
current music: random thoughts running thru my head
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