28 Mar 2003 - 13:37 mood  -  depressed music  -  hospital announcements and Lys playing. Tina's in a coma. We came out here when we found out...then... I was stupid... ...and he left. Now what do I do? ( For Chris ) leave me one

23 Mar 2003 - 23:43 mood  -  lonely music  -  silence Alyssa's with his mother. I'm here...with the corpse of the man I love. He doesn't respond to my touch, he doesn't show any emotion...he's just...there. He warned me, but I pressed the issue. Am I that fucking stupid? I swear, if I could go back and change things, I would. I just want him to get past this shit. Is that so wrong? Now he's going to hate me for pushing him. *sighs, running fingers through hair* He's written some new songs. I guess it was good for something, right? *snorts* I can't give up on him, or leave him like this. leave me one

what to do... 18 Mar 2003 - 19:36 mood  -  confused music  -  My Baby - A Plain Morning So, I asked him about TBP last night. He avoided it. I hope some day he finds it in hisself to tell me what happened, but I don't want to pressure him. As long as he's okay now. *sighs softly* I'm in Cali. Have that unsigned artists thing tonight. I hate hotel rooms. They're so cold and lonely. I can't wait to be back in his arms again. I didn't leave Lys on the best terms. I had to punish her last night, and well, I'm the worst father on earth in her eyes at the moment. She told Chris she hated him and punched him. *shakes head* I knew that it wouldn't be perfect forever, but I was hoping that just maybe my luck would hold. She's apologized, but still. Well, I should go get ready...have to brave the fans tonight that found out about this thing. 2 - leave me one

don't wake him 11 Mar 2003 - 12:27 mood  -  sad music  -  His breathing Last night was the most amazing night of my life. We had a few glasses of champagne to celebrate, and then went to the bedroom. We just laid there most of the night, holding each other, talking, kissing. It was better than sex could ever be. Now, it's time for him to leave. I don't want to wake him, I just...hope he'll sleep through it, but I know it has to be done. *sighs, clicking update and walking over to the bed, gently shaking him* 9 - leave me one

wow 10 Mar 2003 - 04:35 mood  -  giddy music  -  Chris and Lys' breathing Chris and I got custody. I got the call just as I was leaving to pick him up at the airport. We went to my parent's from there and picked Lys up. It's all so...surreal. She's ours...living with us...permanantly. And tomorrow we're going to the hospital to give her a little brother or sister. I couldn't be happier. Well, maybe if Chris didn't have to go back to Boca on Tuesday, but distance makes the heart grow fonder, right? My mom is so excited about having another grandchild. She's an amazing woman. I swear, watching her, Lys, and Chris talking and laughing over chocolate chip cookies tonight...I finally felt my life was complete. I have all I've ever wanted or needed. Everything from now on is just a bonus. My family loves him, Lys loves him. It can't get any better than this. Waking up in his arms, with Lys jumping on our bed is like winning the lottery...only I get to do it over and over. How did I ever get so lucky? I am, however, a little nervous of what my mother told him tonight when I left them alone to talk. I hope she didn't embarrass me too badly. *chuckles softly* I have this unsigned artist's thing to host a week from Tuesday in West Hollywood. Lys is going to stay with my parents. I'm excited. It's been a while since I've been out there, and I'm glad this came up. It feels good to be able to go out there and show our fans that we're not done. I just...I need to talk to Drew. I don't want to go back into recording and touring with this rift. I miss him being a part of my life. *hits update and turns, watching Chris and Alyssa sleep, smiling softly, whispering* Perfect. *crawls into bed, careful not to disturb them* 3 - leave me one

OOC 07 Mar 2003 - 08:20 ( OOC ) leave me one

I'm officially Mr. Carrabba 01 Mar 2003 - 20:52 mood  -  worried music  -  My Jessy - I Wanna Love You Forever (I'm a sap) We got married yesterday. It was perfect. Not too big, family and friends. Lys threw her daisies everywhere. *chuckles* I took Chris' name because well, Timmons-Carrabba and Carrabba-Timmons sound kind of weird. I'll go by Timmons for my career though...you know how it goes. *sighs* Lys is sick. So much for a honeymoon. She came into our bedroom this morning saying she had a sore throat. It escaladed from there. Poor girl has a temp of 102°. She only wants Chris. *laughs* How quickly daddy's replaced. Just kidding. I hope she gets better soon. I hate seeing her like this. Chris is so wonderful with her. *looks over at their sleeping forms on the bed* I really do hope this custody hearing goes our way. It feels like something's missing when she's gone. Monday starts the barrage of doctor's visits and tests. Poor Chris won't have time to breathe on his "break." I wish he didn't have to go back, but I understand. It's going to be hard when we start recording again. Well, I feel the need to go cuddle up with the two most important people in my world. 3 - leave me one

Life is bittersweet. 27 Feb 2003 - 23:22 mood  -  pissed off Edit: So I posted something just to upset someone here. Stupid on my part. I was pissed, and I wasn't thinking rationally. I had been hurt badly. I'm getting married tomorrow, yet I lost someone tonight. Funny how life works, isn't it? So I guess tonight was both a beginning and an end. 8 - leave me one

he's back! 22 Feb 2003 - 03:34 mood  -  horny music  -  Kid Rock & Sheryl Crow - Picture So, that little sneak surprised me this afternoon. He was a sight for sore eyes. Have I said yet how much I missed him? Yeah. Alyssa was excited. Chris picked her up from school and she wouldn't leave him be for more than a minute. Trish comes back tomorrow. The fairy-tale is over. It's amazing how it feels so right. Chris, Alyssa and I...it's like our own little family already. I stopped by to see Drew. Alyssa's been asking about him. I wish things were different, but I'm not about to give Chris up just to make things better. I love Drew, he's like a brother to me, but I can't love him the way he wants me to. Does that make me a bad person? He told me I didn't even give him a second chance. *sighs* Maybe I am wrong, who knows. All I know is I have to tell Alyssa that her Uncle Drew won't be around for a while. I don't know how to do it. That's about it. If you don't hear from me this weekend, don't worry. I'm just enjoying my time with my fiance. leave me one

I miss Chris 17 Feb 2003 - 21:09 mood  -  lonely music  -  Richard Marx - Right Here Waiting He hasn't even been gone a full day yet, and I'm already going nuts. Lys is walking around like she lost her best friend. So am I for that matter. I miss you baby, like crazy. So what do I do for the next two weeks? I have to make plans for the wedding, and make appointments for us for when he gets back, but that only takes so much time. What do I do when that's done? I can just see it now, my phone bill is going to be sky high. Okay, I'm depressing, I'm sorry. I'll just end this entry with some lyrics, and save you all the bull. ( Chris ) leave me one

happy v-day 14 Feb 2003 - 20:02 mood  -  loved music  -  John Lennon - Imagine Happy Valentine's Day everyone! Drew - I know we're not on the best terms right now, but I got you a little something. I hope you like it. your present Chris - I know I told you I was finished, but, I too want to spoil you. So I got you a few more things. Don't shoot me! *grins* We'll find somewhere to put it Good definition... Hey, it's our saying! I'm a sap I hope everyone's having a good day, spending time with loved ones. leave me one

12 Feb 2003 - 01:16 For someone that loves me so damn much, he's glad to see me go? *shakes head* I've tried to just give him time, let him handle this in his own way, and then salvage whatever friendship we had left. I guess that's just me wanting what I can't have. Do I care? Yes. Has it crushed me to see him this upset? Yes. Am I guilty? Yes, I am, more than you would think. But in Chris, I've found someone that I trust with all my heart and soul. Yes, I haven't known him as long as I've known Drew, but it doesn't matter. I know him inside and out now. I know that when I come home, with the world on my shoulders, he'll lay me down and tell me everything is going to be okay. I know that he won't keep anything from me, even if it's going to hurt me. I know I can trust him with my life. Do I know that I can do that with Drew? No. I'm sorry, it hurts me to say that, but I don't. He kept the truth from me and let me assume differently. And who was there telling me I wasn't a bad person through all of this? Not Drew, but Chris. Now you tell me who I should be with. *rubs temples and shakes head* In other news, Chris and I celebrated Valentine's day today, a bit early, because we'll have Alyssa on Friday. He made me a wonderful dinner, and then I tried to get him all nervous. I gave him a big hershey's kiss, and acted as if that was his only present. It kind of backfired on me when he told me he didn't need anything more than the thought. So I confessed and gave him his real present. A BMW and his ring. I wanted to propose to him traditionally, so I did it tonight. It was the best night of my life. I love him more than words can describe. Hopefully, soon, we'll be a family. Alyssa, Chris and I. The three of us. I'm filing the papers for full custody tomorrow morning, and I pray that everything works out. leave me one

ramblings of love 09 Feb 2003 - 23:25 mood  -  loved music  -  Beatles - Hey Jude Chris... *sighs happily* He does things to me that I can't explain. I never thought I'd be able to trust someone again, but then he came into my life, and showed me just how wrong I was. He met Alyssa. *smiles softly* She loves him to death. The only test left, and he passed with flying colors. We're talking about being a family, the three of us. I asked him to marry me. I know it's soon, but shit, he and Alyssa are my reason for everything any more. I don't want to spend a day without him ever again. I want to do something special for him, but what do you do for a guy like him? I'm so bad at romance... *chuckles* Well, it's time to put the little one to bed. Then the night is ours. 22 - leave me one

finger lickin' good 04 Feb 2003 - 04:14 mood  -  horny My boyfriend is gorgeous. That is all. 1 - leave me one

hmmm 02 Feb 2003 - 12:51 mood  -  bouncy music  -  Dashboard Confessional - Screaming Infidelities I adore my boyfriend. *nods* only because he told me to post that. kidding baby Should I be jealous of his fascination with Steve's head? *shrugs* I love my Jessi. She's the bestest. I want to be a pimp. I miss Chris. <end of pointless post> 9 - leave me one

30 Jan 2003 - 20:10 mood  -  amused Name's Jeff. I'm 29. Member of 98°. Wanna know more? IM me. xJeff Timmonsx ( OOC ) 24 - leave me one

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