My Life In A Fishbowl's Blurty Entries [entries|friends|calendar] My Life In A Fishbowl [ website | ozprojekt: an art portfolio ] [ userinfo | blurty userinfo ] [ calendar | blurty calendar ]

jen someone [12 Mar 2003|11:26am] [ mood | accomplished ] just wanted to share with you my design for Jen Grupe's cd. and no, the cd is not available. i don't know if we'll distribute it or what. it's just a demo, we'll probably give a copy to NU107, don't know what will happen after that. 5 nibbles| feed the fish

UP Fair... [11 Feb 2003|06:19pm] ( up fair band lineup ) 1 nibble| feed the fish

highlights of hell week [01 Feb 2003|04:29am] [ mood | awake ] [ music | "Ride a Black Swan" by Zwan ] i plan to spend my saturday sleeping. this has been a hectic work week. a killer work week. i am gonna kill my mouse, i swear.... enough about that. let me try to write an update about my week. umm.... monday we had our first year cell group anniversary at Jourdan's place. (what's a cell group? basically, it's a bible study group, only a bit deeper... friendship is an important component.) the food was delicious. i brought keema with eggplant from Mister Kabab's. yummy. at one point our prayer circle was so intense i had to fight back tears... i can't really explain what happened. but Andres Bulate told me afterwards that he had a vison. he was kneeling on the floor, eyes closed, and he could see angels surrounding us, in all the rooms of the house, even the kitchen. mindblowing.... okay. ahh wednesday was fun, too. went to The Reviewer launch party at the Enterprise. saw a lot of old friends there... Mari from the old getasia.com crowd, music scene people like Candice, Danny, Acel. and i got to see Imago again after ages and ages. i was absolutely thrown by Aia's get-up -- she was in a flowery blouse and a skirt! wow, Aia was showing her girly side that night! unbelievable. but she was lovely. best part of the night was when Maegan Aguilar jammed with Raimund of Sandwich, Ricci of Mojofly, and Mike Elgar of Rivermaya. Maegan was the drummer! and she was fantastic, she was singing too -- then Raimund took the mic, did his Squid 9 rap thingy, and then to my surprise Rann Golamco joined in... wow, i love that guy. a true guitar god, he is. and now i'm talking like Yoda. last surprise of the night came during Rivermaya's closing set.... when Bamboo and Nathan A. suddenly came onstage alongside Rico Blanco. the crowd went nuts -- a Rivermaya reunion! well, not really. but people can dream. a certain friend of mine was really going nuts over Bamboo that night. she was in a total tizzy over him. 1 nibble| feed the fish

life like a houseplant [25 Jan 2003|06:27pm] [ mood | bored ] [ music | "Somewhere in the Middle" by Dishwalla ] i've been a lazy updater.... but it's been a busy week. started work on a new job. i do graphic illustrations for an online training company. that's why my eyes hurt. try staring at a computer screen for hours and hours, working on pixels. i'm like a pale houseplant in need of sunlight. haven't been getting out of the house. (oh, i work at home, did i mention that? it's an online life.) but here's something else to read, then.... the online journal of Fil-Canadian singer-songwriter Emm Gryner: Emm Gryner 2 nibbles| feed the fish

the thing about The Ring..... [17 Jan 2003|11:59pm] [ mood | sick ] [ music | "Lonely Lola Cherry Cola Girl" by Bic Runga ] i just downloaded the "cursed video" from The Ring (us version).... having seen the original japanese film, i must say that this video doesn't seem as scary. i remember seeing the video for the first time in Ringu, the original. the grainy screen images, mysterious and bizarre, and the hauntingly creepy shots of the japanese lady combing her hair in the mirror, gave rise to a prickly feeling at the back of my neck. it was like having a sudden, shocking glimpse at another world of untold horrors, and knowing yourself to be on the borderline between that world and this, and desperately wanting to back away from the edge of an invisible abyss. i have the feeling that the american version of The Ring will be too glossy, too "hollywood" to ever give such a feel. i just know that when i'm in my seat watching the movie, the overwhelming sense that this is a film crafted by formula will kill any possibility of fear. ironically, the crude low-budget look and feel of the original provided an atmosphere of realism that the special effects and sharpness of the remake cannot provide. when watching Ringu, you truly felt as if you were seeing something that actually happened. you left the cinema with the superstitious dread that the curse might fall upon you. i've posted some screencaps of cursed video from The Ring here. obviously, if you haven't seen the film and you don't want to know what the video looks like, then don't peek. but if curiosity gets the best of you.... well, here they are: ( more... ) 3 nibbles| feed the fish

stop the presses! [14 Jan 2003|12:36am] [ mood | amused ] 8 nibbles| feed the fish

homosexualizing The Two Towers [13 Jan 2003|05:48pm] [ mood | amused ] got to watch The Two Towers on the first day, thanks to Mika, who invited me. (Aubrey watched with us, too.) i don't care what Lui says, Legolas ain't gay. nor are Frodo and Sam, for that matter. you people are deluded! i have to admit, though.... that scene where Eowyn sees Legolas returning Arwen's pendant to Aragorn, i couldn't help but imagine Eowyn thinking,oh no, what's going on? the elf gave him the pendant! they must be gay!!! but of course, that doesn't make sense. Eowyn saw the pendant beforehand, she knew Legolas was just returning it to Aragorn. she then realized how valuable the pendant was to Aragorn, and thus how much she loved the woman who gave it to him, dashing her own hopes. she is not jealousof Legolas. sorry to spoil everyone's fun. but then, there's alwaysthe very secret diaries.... i have to say though, that Haldir just looks sooogay. 8 nibbles| feed the fish

[13 Jan 2003|04:11pm] [ mood | sad ] work is over for today (the first day). so i'll talk about hospitals. hospitals.... i've been hospitalized a few times. obviously i don't have any fond memories of my hospital days. i'm just glad there haven't been too many of them. on friday i went to PGH, the philippine general hospital. i have never gone there before. my guide was Jeni, a doctor friend from church. i was there to take photos of TB and dengue patients, an assignment from a social issues magazine. PGH is huge. there's an ER for every department -- one for pediatrics, one for medicine, one for OB, etc. (most hospitals have only one ER.) there are people everywhere, spilling out of tiny metal beds, their relatives milling around. chaos. even if you get a private room here, you can get stuck in the entry ward for hours, in a room full of people.... and it can take a while for anyone to even notice you're there, coz there are only about three doctors (including interns) for every thirty patients. i saw a little girl in her underwear with a bandaged hand, sitting alone and abandoned on a gurney. she looked frightened, forlorn, and ready to cry. i wondered who had brought her there and where they had disappeared to.... i looked her in the eyes and wanted to say something comforting. but i couldn't think of anything. i didn't get to take any pictures. the hospital bureaucracy is intimidating.... like Jeni says, even doctors have to humble themselves to the nurses, and everyone else. you always have to speak nicely -- almost fawningly. while all around, people hurt and bleed and die. feed the fish

back to the grind [11 Jan 2003|12:45am] [ mood | ecstatic ] [ music | "Hungry" by Vineyard/Kathryn Scott (in my head) ] i start work monday. and that means, you know.... a new job. a regular one. it's been a while. i'm tired of scraping out a living doing small jobs, little by little. it's a lot less than what i got in my last job, but i figure God wants to humble me. and this job feels so right. i really want it! the best part is, i never have to leave the house. everything's done online. isn't that so 2003? 2 nibbles| feed the fish

all-nighter [07 Jan 2003|11:28am] last night was the men's night... whatever you might call it. which means that Andres Bulate, Jourdan, Aren and Mike D. came over and stayed the night at my place. we watched videos: first, Run Lola Run, an utterly amazing film starring the lovely Franka Potente as a young woman who has to save her boyfriends life. just how, you ask? well, she's got to scratch up 100,000 marks in only 20 minutes! you have to see this film. second, Fight Club. i've seen it twice before, but it still enthralls me. i just love Brad Pitt's monologue in the middle of the film: TYLER DURDEN I see in fight club the strongest and smartest men who have ever lived -- an entire generation pumping gas and waiting tables; or they're slaves with white collars. Advertisements have them chasing cars and clothes, working jobs they hate so they can buy shit they don't need. We are the middle children of history, with no purpose or place. We have no great war, or great depression. The great war is a spiritual war. The great depression is our lives. We were raised by television to believe that we'd be millionaires and movie gods and rock stars -- but we won't. And we're learning that fact. And we're very, very pissed-off. 3 nibbles| feed the fish

welcome to the year 2003 [02 Jan 2003|01:11am] [ mood | exhausted ] [ music | "I Wanna Know" by Joe ] one: makati to sucat i left the house at 7 pm to meet Andres Bulate at megamall. then we picked up Lui at her place, where Paul the Fly joined us too. we headed for Rockwell where we were expecting to watch rapper Rasta Root of A Tribe Called Quest. Rockwell was deserted. a pathetic wasteland. we drove around looking for the party and, finding nothing, decided to get eat. we popped into Pizza Hut where the one waiter left gave us our menus and melted into thin air. finally, his apparition materialized and was about to take our order when Lui got a text message from Aubrey, inviting us to have dinner at her place. we weren't too keen on waiting for pizza that could take eons to arrive, so we were out the door and on the road to sucat before you could say "free food!" at Aubrey's, 2003 arrived, champagne was brought out, glasses clinked, food was great! we watched the fireworks on tv and then Lui got a call from Mishyfish inviting us over to her place. two: alabang to antipolo it was a short drive from Aubrey's place to Mmishyfish's. in a few kilometers driving down Sucat road, we counted four Burger Machines. at Mishyfish's i had a sudden impulse to call Chame, who also lived around the area.... we ended up driving to her place and picking her up. then we all went on a trip to Antipolo. Antipolo is miles and miles of curving road up in the mountains. dark places where fearful things are said to dwell. we ended up at a grassy open court overlooking a valley of lights. we spread mats on the grass, prayed, played guitar, and sang. it sounds boring, but we were laughing almost all the time, and now i can't even remember why. there was me, Lui, Chame, Mishyfish, Paul, Bulate, Jourdan, Syke, Him, Corinne, Maan... about eighteen people (and a dog). we stayed there 'til the sun broke through the clouds... first sunrise of '03. we all tramped up the road to Him's place, where we were fed a magnificent breakfast. hot chocolate, fresh pan de sal with delicious pimiento cheese and the best corned beef i ever tasted. sitting around on the grass: the first sunrise of 2002: "look! is it a bird? a plane?....": the view from up there: feed the fish

happy happy alternativity [29 Dec 2002|04:07am] so awhile ago i was at the NU107 AlterNativity concert in Zillion, Galleria. riding on the escalator i noticed two familiar-looking girls a few steps above me. i surprised them from behind and got screams and hugs in return. it was Tara! and Goldie! here's the three of us, with Popeye: AlterNativity was loads of fun. a fight broke up during Sandwich's set, and Marc Abaya said if somebody wanted to fight, why not meet him outside? nobody took up Marc's offer. The Dawn's set was insane... can you imagine people moshingto new wave music? well it just goes to show how amazing The Dawn can be. and i got a real kick out of the Itchyworms' set. they did "Happy Birthday" interspersed with kazoo renderings of "Pasko Na Naman." what a laugh trip! i love the 'worms. oh, i also saw Hannah and was finally able to give her the mix cds i made for her -- including a Juliana Hatfield compo -- and she was just so happy to get my gift. that made me happy, too. feed the fish

against the flow [24 Dec 2002|04:46am] [ mood | confused ] [ music | "Life Goes On" by Leann Rimes ] (Jimmy, Jourdan, and "Against the Flow" hosts Jourdan, KT, and JaeDee) just came from the NU 107 "Against the Flow" christmas special, which featured a lot of guest performances, like: Kitchie Nadal (of Mojofly) sang a new composition accompanied by Barbie Almalbis (of Barbie's Cradle) on the guitar; then Barbie sang one of the songs from her upcoming album. Jephtha and the rest of the Virus Artists performed; Andres Bulate and Acoustic Faith sang a christmas song, "Tuloy Pa Rin Ang Pasko." Jourdan the Dreamer did a very emotional spoken word piece culminating in an explosive "tic... tic... tic... BOOM!" but i spent most of the time playing grab-the-pillow with Anne C. pillow tug-of-war is a very amusing game. it had an even more uproarious finish when Anne hammered me with the pillow. it was a pretty hard, and LOUD smack! i think i am turning into a kid again.... here's Kitchie and Barbie doing their number: here's Atomic Kitten.... er, i mean Jen, Sarah and KT: me and my friends... i'm in the middle, front row. Anne is the girl beside me: feed the fish

"everybody was kung fu fighting" [22 Dec 2002|12:41am] [ mood | amused ] [ music | "Whitey's Theme" by Superdrag ] last night:the church youth party at Galleria, then Adjeng's birthday party at the penthouse of a nearby condo. Danny was back from Nepal. he gave me a metal pin shaped like a sword... a Nepalese sword, i guess. Jen Grupe gave me a bag of chocolates. my first official christmas gifts! (aside from my cellphone, that is.) there was a swimming pool on the deck at Adjeng's party. above it were the stars. i imagined a night with a meteor shower, going up to the penthouse and turning off all the lights, and seeing the night sky reflected in the pool, and watching shooting stars streak through its waters. tonight:i borrowed some videos, Raise the Red Lantern and Ju Dou. Zhang Yimou films. i'm planning to do some cinematic self-study. went to Megamall where Andres Bulate and i watched Shaolin Soccer. guy, that was a funny movie. i loved the part where Vicky Zhao, playing a kung fu master-turned-cook, whips up a batch of sticky sweet buns using shaolin techniques... and the sudden dance sequence that immediately follows... and then -- oh just watch the movie already if you haven't yet, you'll laugh your socks off! or maybe you won't, in which case i'm sorry to tell you that you need help. feed the fish

the tale of one dead rat [18 Dec 2002|06:08pm] [ mood | frustrated ] [ music | "Give Love on Christmas Day" ] there have been so many parties in the past few days. i seem to have lost count. just the other day i was at Jourdan's place for the male singles party. i entered a house bathed in darkness and wreathed in the sweet sickly smell of incense. i remembered what had happened the night before. we had all gone to Jourdan's house, and upon entering almost gagged at the horrid smell of dead rat. yes, a rat had died in Jourdan's room. it was no ordinary rat, either... it was, like, the Cujo of rats. it was the size of a cat. no... it could've eaten a cat. man, it was huge. Jourdan was squealing like a girl at the sight of the rat, which Tan wrapped in a plastic bag. he was lifting the bag to show us the size of the monster, and Yvette actually touched it through the plastic! she made Jourdan touch it too, saying he had to overcome his phobia. he was pretty disgusted, but he touched it. "feel its tail," said Yvette, "feel its tail!" feed the fish

the rockwell meetup [15 Dec 2002|12:54am] [ mood | cheerful ] bloggers at the rockwell eb: Wayne, Lui, me, Honey, Angel, and Aubrey (i'm not allowed to give out Honey's blog address...) i met up with Aubrey, Angel, and Wayne in front of Page One at the Rockwell Powerplant. we strolled outside where an MTV fair was going on... got some horrid coffee at the Nescafe Frothe booth... found the whole thing really lame. we went back inside Powerplant, met up with Honey, and watched Full Frontaltogether. only Honey didn't watch with us, she met two of her friends at the cinema and they wanted to see My Big Fat Greek Wedding, which Aubrey had already seen. so we split ways 'til after the movies. then we checked out this concert launching of Single: The Soundtrack nearby. a band called Lemon's Tears was playing, they were quite good. Lui said they sounded like Imago. we left Honey in Rockwell and drove to The Loft in Katipunan, only to find out it was reserved for a private party. so we ended up in Grilla, Libis, drinking up a bucket of san mig lite. that was one fun night. feed the fish

ecstasy [09 Dec 2002|04:14pm] [ mood | high ] [ music | "Sweetness" by Jimmy Eat World ] it is a feeling like being on drugs. the feeling of losing yourself, losing your inhibitions. being caught up in a wave of something powerful and amazing and indescribable. you find yourself touched in the deepest part of you. and your entire body is tingling with a sensation of lightness and effervesence. if you were made of liquid, you would be champagne. you feel like you are dissolving into a million billion infinitesimal sparkling bubbles. your body is floating in air. oh wait, it's not your body that's floating, but the real you. the you that exists inside yourself. it feels like it is soaring, and leaves your body so light and weak that you almost collapse. for a few moments you sway precariously. and you surprise yourself by completely letting go. you find yourself singing, shouting, dancing, leaping into the air. these are not things that you do normally, but you are now doing them. you don't care what anyone thinks. you don't care who's looking at you. you are living only for this moment. a moment of pure ecstasy. tears are flowing down your face. tears of joy. it is as if a lightning bolt of love came down from the sky and struck you. instead of killing you it seared off all the awful chains the world has bound around you, burned off all your old skin, and you are dancing like a newborn in his new skin, free for the very first time. that is the best i can describe it. that is what i experienced. sometimes, in the drudgery of day-to-day life, i almost forget it happened. yet part of me can never forget it. because i know this for certain: i am loved. i am loved. i am loved!.... by one who is greater than me. feed the fish

mourning [02 Dec 2002|03:46pm] [ mood | tired ] [ music | "Alright Without U" by Mojofly ] yesterday.after i got Dada's call telling me of Chico's death, i was destabilized. i informed a few more people myself, then took a shower. every few minutes i broke into sobs and screams, unable to control myself. it was all.... so unfair. i didn't feel like going to sunday service, but i went anyway. i remembered the story of David when his infant son died. he had been fasting and praying, but when his servants told him the child was dead, he rose and went to worship God. then he ate and drank, and when his consternated servants asked him why, David replied, "While the child was alive, i fasted and wept.... but now he is dead; why should i fast? Can i bring him back again? I shall go to him, but he shall not return to me." so i went to our service, and worshiped there, and afterwards had dinner with my friends. then i went to Chico's wake. a number of his friends were there, the Fine Arts crowd. of course, his family was there. his sister Chinggay was only a shadow of herself, but still she stood dignified in grief. i looked away from her cried-out eyes and mumbled a few useless platitudes. on these occasions, i never know what to say. then i stood over his coffin, prayed, and cried. (but later.... we were in the family room at back, joking and laughing. i know Chico wouldn't mind.) feed the fish

the frailty of things [01 Dec 2002|03:18pm] [ mood | sad ] the frailty of things people are dying all around me. (everybody is dying someday, of course. however, some are dying much faster than others.) i hadn't seen my college mate R. in a long, long time. i saw him a few nights ago at a gig. he was very drunk. he kept telling me stuff like, "chase your dreams, man.... don't let anything stop you from chasing your dreams." i asked him for his number. he wrote something on a flyer, and handed it to me. this is what i read: R. IS DYING OF CANCER 0919-XXXXXXX cancer? the guy's just about my age. he's too young. it makes no sense at all. i know, i know. he was drunk. but i believe him. he's dying. he's so young. a talented artist. what a waste that would be. and today, i learned that Chico died in the hospital. i can't quite believe it... his death truly saddens me. i'm starting to understand the frailty of things. feed the fish

K.A.F.E. in Katipunan [01 Dec 2002|01:02pm] [ mood | okay ] yesterday, i dropped by Ateneo where i ran into Zarah. she said there was a gig going on in K.A.F.E. at Katipunan that night, and she asked if i wanted to check it out. so i did... but before it started, i left and went to the prayer meeting at the Victory center a few blocks away. i walked to the Victory center, where i found that they had already started. so i just sat quietly and prayed with the rest. we finished about fifteen minutes later. then i walked back to K.A.F.E. there was a band competition going on. i liked the first band, a kinda jazzy/world music group with a pretty belly-baring singer. another band i really liked was the one that sounded like the Dave Matthews Band, complete with violin. the singer even lookedlike Dave Matthews. oh, and i was wearing an Ateneo varsity jacket that night. something i would never have imagined doing in a million years.... feed the fish

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