|
|
Wednesday, May 26th, 2004
|
3:43p - wtf?!
OK remember when I wrote about the dude who got yelled at by some prick officer at his brother's funeral? Well the retard officer is actually going to pursue a full blown court-martial with this poor guy. It's like what the hell?!!? Of course he had to tack on some extra charges in addition to improper wear of the uniform, he is accusing the dude of going AWOL and something about weapons possession. Now I have no clue where the part about weapons possession came from, but if the dude's COC knew he was going to be gone and there's a paper trail the AWOL charge goes straight out the window. And the medals issue, seriously, how can someone get court-martialled on that?! Every servicemember on the planet in any branch is authorized to wear the NDSM now and at least one of the GWOT medals. Do these officers even read? Geez! There are MILPER messages all over the place that explain very clearly. Sheesh! Hopefully this guy's JAG officer is as good a lawyer as Sean Drummond or he might presumably be in a world of shit. If anything the weapons charge is what is going to bring him down. Blah, good people reap no benefit from this world.
current mood:  shocked
|
7:32p - Warning labels
Due to increasing products liability litigation, American liquor manufacturers have accepted the FDA's suggestion that the following warning labels be placed immediately on all varieties of alcohol containers:
----------------------------------------------
WARNING: The consumption of alcohol may leave you wondering what the hell happened to your bra and panties.
--------------------------------------------
WARNING: The consumption of alcohol may make you think you are whispering when you are not.
-------------------------------------------
WARNING: The consumption of alcohol is a major factor in dancing like a retard.
----------------------------------------------
WARNING: The consumption of alcohol may cause you to tell your friends over and over again that you love them.
----------------------------------------------
WARNING: The consumption of alcohol may cause you to think you can sing.
----------------------------------------------
WARNING: The consumption of alcohol may lead you to believe that ex-lovers are really dying for you to telephone them at 4:00 in the morning.
----------------------------------------------
WARNING: The consumption of alcohol may make you think you can logically converse with other members of the opposite sex without spitting.
----------------------------------------------
WARNING: The consumption of alcohol is the leading cause of inexplicable rug burns on the forehead, knees, and lower back.
----------------------------------------------
WARNING: The consumption of alcohol may create the illusion that you are tougher, smarter, faster and better-looking than most people.
----------------------------------------------
WARNING: The consumption of alcohol may lead you to think people are laughing WITH you.
-----------------------------------------------
WARNING: The consumption of alcohol may cause pregnancy.
----------------------------------------------
WARNING: the crumsumpten of alcahol may Mack you tink you can tipe real gode.
current mood:  amused
|
|
|
|
