| three |
[07|12|06 @ 05 PM] |
| [ |
mood |
| |
hungry |
] |
| [ |
music |
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killswitch engage - the element of one |
] |
the sound of your voice is music in my ears. the sight of your chest rising & falling, as you rest peacefully and drift away into dreamland, comforts me more than anything ever has.
i don't just want you, i need you.
i don't just love you, i'm in love with you.
i don't just care for you, i protect you.
i don't just want to hold you, i never want to let go.
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| two |
[07|12|06 @ 12 AM] |
| [ |
mood |
| |
calm |
] |
| [ |
music |
| |
nothing |
] |
i'm glad i finally got to talk to jenni. she's a great person, & yes she may have had her mishaps in the past but the past is the past & it's time for everyone to let go.
all i can do is wonder what life is going to be like now. i've pretty much given myself a clean slate, ready to move forward and meet new people - express myself openly, and not be the submissive one constantly taking shit off of everyone else. i've got strength, greater than most because i've worked for it. i've worked for every ounce of dignity i've retained & the fact remains that i'll always have a cockyness about me when it comes to it.
i guess my desire to make it clear to the world that i am never threatened overbears my desire to just be me sometimes. but i am me, because i don't want to be anyone else. i don't care anymore, and it's easier to say than do. but i can do this, for myself and for everyone else. now i can finally sit back, enjoy life, listen to the rain, smell the roses, and love it all.
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| one |
[07|11|06 @ 06 PM] |
| [ |
mood |
| |
content |
] |
| [ |
music |
| |
alice in chains - would |
] |
i'm not sure why i decided to create this. i always end up losing interest or forgetting to update - forcing my friends to think i fell off the face of the earth. but i don't see that happening anytime soon & i'm going to make an effort to keep this alive.. for the sake of myself.
i've got a lot resting hard on my chest right now. a lot of decisions to make about a lot of things. i guess i have somewhat isolated myself from the world, but that's the way they want it. i can't stop thinking about the situation with my mother, and i can't stop thinking about college. i also need to find a new group of friends, because even my closest friends suddenly disgust me with their petty lives. complexity is key here, folks. catch me off guard, & you've earned your way to my heart. annoy the hell out of me, & i want nothing to do with you anymore.
with that being said, welcome to my life. welcome to my grumbles, my angst. i love, & that should be enough for you.
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