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[19 Apr 2008|06:12pm] |
My mood, it has to be said has been better over the years. If I were to describe this one it would fall somewhere between moribund and mundane. I have very little to say, and even less energy to say it. Like I said on a video last night, I just feel tired, like i'm running uphill, everyday. Not just physically, but mentally. It's almost as if i'm resigned to this malaise.
The spark has left me, you could say.
Anyway, it's not all bad. Last night's curry and beer was a wecome distraction from whatever is going on or not going on in my head. Graham had made a curry, and it was a very good curry. There were several parts to it, so you could say it was a curry in several episodes. Each one was a festoonement of flavour, a cacophony of cheer for the tastebuds. Prior to this, Joe and I were trying to put together a jigsaw puzzle of Jesus Christ. I'm not joking. Graham had been trying to find Jesus' face for a week, and I found it in one evening. I completed the face of Jesus. I should be given some sort of ascension for that. I should. Yes, I should.
After the curry and the jigsaw (It's nowhere near finished, incidentally) we began to watch This is England, which is a film about racial tensions in England in 1983. Perhaps i'll do a review of it at some point. It is extremely good. That's not the review.
Halfway through we went to the Bell. Then we went back to the house, with French Andy in tow, and watched Terminator 2, during which Alexandrer turned up, fresh from seeing the Hives in London. I was quite drunk by now, and drank a White Russian, before going home and quite forgetting my cigarrettes. Unless I dropped them in the street. What I do remember, is that on the way home I was listening to the song "Furless is Freedom" from the cartoon the Angry Beavers. It's like a showtune for kids, and as I walked home I do admit I was dancing to it in a very extravagant way. When I did get home, I felt suddenly quite, quite frustrated about being single, as you read. I would say I am, but it doesn't usually bother me, that much. I think i'm like Bill Hicks, who once said of serial killers..
"You know, women will send these guys.....fuckin' love letters. Fuckin' love letters, man. And i'm not gettin' laid!"
It's true. I'm a good man, and I think I deserve some sort of romantic interlude. Okay, it's not as if I help myself. I don't really get out of Minster, after all. But this is merely part of the frustration. It's half my fault, and half me having something indefinably wrong with me. I don't know. That's what I was upset about. I wasn't sad, I was just pissed off with myself, and being single. So there you have it. I did film a video, and it was of that ilk, but i'm not linking it. If you really want to see it, just look on the youtube site. It's nothing i'm going to delete, but not exactly something I want to celebrate and fling about online too much either. If you want to see me tossing off verbally about my poxy lonely life, go ahead.
My right foot hurts, and has been for a week. I don't care to walk on it too much.
Okay, that's it for today.
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