|
[14 Oct 2006|01:14am] |
Lyndsay Lohan appears to think that "Redheads are more sexual than other girls".
Thanks for that, Lyndsay. Steretypes do work both ways, my girl. You fucking idiot. The wise thing to do would be to make no stupid generalisations in either direction, would it not?
Tonight's been a fairly palatable night of pints and pool. I even won, in conjunction with Richy Rich. Dan-o-matic and Juicy Luce were in attendence.
Two days till G.
Two days until I have to read my shit homework.
Two days until Monday.
|
|
|
[14 Oct 2006|03:31pm] |
Liverpool 0-1 Blackburn.
Well, shit.
Work today promised to be a lot worse than it was, with a wedding party hanging about. It was fairly busy but not too much.
Still I feel drained. Blah.
|
|
|
[14 Oct 2006|03:50pm] |
A quiz. Insert your tired groans now.
( Read more... )
|
|
|
[14 Oct 2006|04:25pm] |
Thank fucking Christ.
Liverpool 1 - 1 Blackburn.
I'm actually quite scared that I care so much about this. Especially as my head is banging and i'm distracted by writing tasks. It's quite exciting!
|
|
|
[14 Oct 2006|04:58pm] |
What's he doing? Why isn't he keeping still? What if the drill slips and it lodges in his gum? He won't be laughing then. He's STILL laughing. I didn't go to med school for two years just so I could have my professtion blatantly mocked in front of my own face. Jesus Christ, keep still! Actually, if I accidentally lopped out a tooth, would that be so bad? I could blame it on a mild fit. His word against mine. Keep laughing my boy, that's it, just keep laughing....
I don't go to the dentist anymore. The reason is simply that whenever I am forced into a situation in which I have to maintain a quiet and still composure, I can't do it. It's a nightmare. The same thing happened to me at school, during a quiet assembly. I call it the schoolboy effect. At any point during times when i'm called upon to be mature and stoical, I simply get reduced to the mind of a giggling, potty minded child.
This happened during one such orthadox operation, when I was sat in the chair and the dentist was hanging over me waving his metal death prod, about to plunge it into my gob. As he did so, the utter absuridity of my own expression hit me, mouth open in a silent "O", and eyes wide and staring. I felt the nightmarish feeling of bubbling laughter gnawing at my stomach like a beaver in a wood factory. I couldn't take my mind off it, the situation, the bloke's face gawping into my mouth, and the fact that thinking about not laughing made me want to laugh more. I started shaking and shivering slightly, and the drill slipped about. I settled briefly, and was okay until I caught sight of my own gaping face in the reflection in the shiny metal surrounding the light above my face. A big screaming fizzog. I couldn't keep it in, and started shaking like a corpse nailed to an electric fence.
The dentist was not pleased, and asked me to stop moving. I stopped, and immediately the pressure was now even worse. All my schoolboy immaturity came flooding back. Primitive toilet humour flooded my mind like a scatalogical swarm. It was all too much. I was red faced, shaking like a drum of bees, and when the operation was finally done, I meekishly apologised and never, ever went back.
True, I may end up with a mouthful of rotten split teeth, but it's a lot better than trying to choke back laughs in a dentist's face.
|
|
|
[14 Oct 2006|05:17pm] |
Think i've cracked it. What you see there is a former diary post re-written in a dual narrative style in the first person view of myself and the dentist.
I think it's going to be okay. I think it's going to be okay! Thank Christ!. Even if it doesn't get laughs, I don't care! I'm done, and i'm going to relax for the first time in a fricking week!
Oh yeah, work. Dammit.
GRAHAM'S BACK MONDAY GRAHAM'S BACK MONDAY GRAHAM'S BACK MONDAY!
|
|
|
[14 Oct 2006|05:19pm] |
Bolbington. Wherever you are, Rich's birthday outing is Friday night. You coming? Let me know in virtual of real life.
It's going to be a Takahiro-tastic evening.
All together now..
"GGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEZAAAAAHHHH!"
Thank you very much. Bye then.
|
|