| can you explain why i'm crazy? |
[12 Nov 2003|11:16pm] |
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I'm slowly going crazy...slowly dying. and completely losing my mind. this depression is suffocating me. that would be nice...to suffocate. the scary thing is, I don't have a whole lot to be depressed about. I hate it that I'm sad for no reason and I CAN'T control it. (happy thought happy thoughts...breathe amanda) I don't even know where to begin. I like blake...alot...it seems that I'm causing more trouble than I'm worth for him though. everyone is mad at him. they're probably mad at me too but I'm too used to it to notice. poor blake. all my fault. I like him I like him I like him. ::::sigh:::: I haven't been sleeping much or eating much or doing much of anything lately. I'm scared about that. I'm just so goddamn paranoid. I'm sorry for the hurt I'm currently causing everyone. what's wrong with me? can YOU tell me? I made a ton of jello today...gotta love jello. travis and I are going to florida next summer...I can't believe he had to leave school. this sucks so badly. is it really too much to ask for some fucking happiness? I'm sorry that I'm dumping my thoughts on you. I'm not openly this crazy. I just can't take it anymore. off to bed with me do dream my crazy dreams...good night to you and yours.
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13 pretty/ please
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| thank YOU cody |
[11 Nov 2003|01:02pm] |
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alright this is going to be short yet again because I don't feel like typing out a whole bunch. yesterday I went to school, it was a good day for the most part. afterwards I went home and there was a news crew at my house so I had to be interviewed about how my security system makes me feel and yea...that'll be on on thursday, if you watch it I will have to kill you. we went out to eat at "tiffanys" as my grandmother calls it...auctually tippins, it wasn't that great, I wanted sushi. I came home and cody came over and we watched movies and hung out and he informed me on how to get around union's block system. muah ha ha ha. then he left at 9 and blake called and we talked for about 5 minutes..we're going out. there's a whole story there but if you really care to hear about it, you can IM me. I'm happy, a little apprehensive but happy. after school today I have guitar. my counseling secessions have been stopped...that worries me right there, but we'll see how I get along. okay this was longer than I expected. I've gotta update the other blurty and the xanga...you should read all of them. it'll be intresting maybe. all my non-love. comment please and thank you.
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8 pretty/ please
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| short |
[10 Nov 2003|09:58pm] |
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hey everyone this is going to be short but I'll try to update tomorrow in aide because dearest cody has showed me how to get around their stupid blocking. anyway I got an xanga (www.xanga.com/neverfeltsoUSED) and blake and I have a blurty. haha. it's adam_carolena. anyway I'll update tomorrow. I love you very much.
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3 pretty/ please
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| just can't take it anymore |
[09 Nov 2003|02:51pm] |
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ice age...fuck yea |
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hey everyone...this has possibly been the most emotional weekend ever. obviously I'm still alive and nothing happened at school on friday...damn. the only reason i went was to see a fight and there wasn't one, I am dissapointed. after school I came home for a while and then went to natalie's with heidi and tara, hung out there, then went to the movies. despite the horrible night I had, scary movie three was quite good. basically everything came crashing down at once and I ended up in tears and god it just sucked. mother picked us up and took nat home after natalie and heidi's skirts were flipped up by some immature ass holes. then I came home and watched chicago and was awake until about 5. it's funny how depression affects your eating and sleeping habits. saturday I got up at 8ish for a grand total of around 3 hours of sleep. I went to ballet then came back home and took a shower, went to the mall with heidi and travis, and went to noises off with emily and heidi last night...most of that was fairly fun. we visited cody at the mall and noises off was hilarious. then I came home and was up quite late again...woke up when mother got home around 9 and did nothing. nothing. which leads me to what I'm doing now...watching ice age and not doing my homework. my feelings on the blake situation are currently that of confusion, I don't really want to write about that. a good friend says that my unmentioned someone wouldn't hurt me, I would love to believe that but you know me and my trust issues...oh I redid my layout. what do you think? I leave you with a song that might start to describe how I feel...although I don't know. there is too much going on in this mind of mine. comment please and thank you.
The Juliana Theory
If I Told You This Is Was Killing Me Would You Stop
Watch your mouth hold your toungue boy because you're running
out of breath running out of time before every careless word
that you utter renders you utterly useless now you're drowning
in your own saliva trying to speak yourself to the top of your
hardcore world well keep on talking just keep on rambling you've
got your mouth full now listen here's the pleasant part you
and i we fell apart why don't you make up your mind shut your
mouth burn your bridges throw your words like an attack stab
me in the wait a second what's that i just heard nevermind it's
obviously useless now you're standing on your soapbox yelling
from the rooftops everything you say is a lie now listen here's
the clever one who speaks before his thoughts are done why can't
you make up your mind watch your mouth hold your tongue some
things are better left unsaid now i hope you're pleased you
let your pride stand tall it danced within your words right
before your fall why don't you say that to my face if i told
you this was killing me would you stop?
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2 pretty/ please
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| thought I was lost but i was stranded |
[07 Nov 2003|01:01pm] |
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thirce |
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hey everyone. while the majority of you are safely secure in your homes, I have made the decision to attend school this day. this will probably be a long entry...I have alot on my mind. so back track to when I last updated...wednesday night I went to 180 with bethany emily jasmine katy and the gang...speaking of gangs we have formed our own...we are the bumblebees. haha. yea so that was alright...I hung out with the inola boys for a while, gotta love them. I got home and humm...I dont remember. probably fought with mother. yesterday was bad...because it was a thursday. I just have alot of "emotional issues" as my counselor would put it. so here we go with that: I like blake alot...a whole lot, but I don't want to. because when you like someone alot you are just setting yourself up to get hurt...and I'm scared. I am more scared of that than being here today and getting shot (more on that later.) but what I'm mostly worried about is that he likes nicole too. and I don't want to ruin any small chance I have with this other guy (IM me to find out who) if blake is going to ask out nicole...god I don't know, I'm a mess. and I really don't want to get hurt, because I'm sick of all of that bullshit. which brings me to the reason of why I've been dating guys like chris and stephen...because they're safe. because I know that I would never like them a whole lot and so they couldn't hurt me. and that's horrible of me...condem me to hell for I deserve it. and there's so much more going on in this mind of mine but I don't think you care to hear about it so I'll shut up now. today hasn't been horrible...if there was a shooting...which I don't think there will be...I wouldn't be too worried...maybe I'll just have them shoot me so all of this can be over, this damn mexican skater war...tonight I'm headed off to the movies...I think I'm seeing texas chainsaw mass. with blake but I don't know if that's still on because we made those plans a few days ago. so that's all for now...I'm going to go make some phone calls and listen to some tunes. if I die today I love you all...I really do. comment please and thank you.
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3 pretty/ please
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| well fuck a cow in the ass |
[05 Nov 2003|01:24pm] |
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I'M GOING FUCKING CRAZY |
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I fucking hate my mom...I really really do...that bitch and her god foresaken pms. GOD. she ruined my whole fucking day...fuck you mom...I hope you read this. when I get my braces off I'm running the fuck away and never comming back to this hellhole. alright so maybe I've just had far too much sugar for my own good...that's pretty obvious considering the fact that I'm shaking...CHRIST! sorry, I've been really stressed out lately. yesterday was good, I think...I can't remember. guitar lessons went good, I can tell you that. I've seen blake more than usual today which is also good...great in fact. I have about a hundred dum dums which is why I'm spazing out. I love you all. I love you blake. but not if you're my mom...if you're my mom then fuck you.
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9 pretty/ please
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| yo and hello |
[03 Nov 2003|01:36pm] |
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HEY HEY...it's been a while. halloween was great fun...I got a ton of candy and heidi and I hung out and bonded which was cool. also EMILY GOT TO COME!!! FUCK YEA! so we had a great time. we watched the exorcist...completely scary...mmm humm. saturday tara and nat and I hung out and got me ready for the homecomming dance which I don't even want to post about...basically chris and I had nothing in common and so we broke up. sunday I caught up on my sleep and finally got up around 2 and was going to go to the mall with heidi and emz but mother and satan have switched places again so that wasn't allowed. today has been good for the most part...no for all the parts...I had jamba juice this morning. I like blake in case that wasn't completely obvious to all of you. I think he likes nicole though...just my luck. but we'll see right? I just had a poptart...those things are so great. after school I'm doing nothing...I need to play guitar and start my art project...yea that's what I'll do. well the bell will be ringing soon. i love you.
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| halloween at last |
[31 Oct 2003|01:13pm] |
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HAPPY HALLOWEEN. and on this day of candy joy I am again doing nothing...I haven't updated in a while...sorry about that. not that you care or anything...not that you're reading this. I don't know. the past week has been for the most part, uneventful...but at the same time very stressful. me being stressed is bad, apparantly stress triggers anxiety and depression and I'm starting to feel the effects of that. so I'll start with now...because wednesday and thursday are nothing big. I've been waiting all day for the mexican/skater war to go down...I don't think it will. there are cops EVERYWHERE. tonight promises to be one of the best halloweens of my life. I cannot wait. auctually this weekend as a whole should be quite good. but stressful...quite stressful. tomorrow is the dance that I am completely worried about...worried that I won't look just right, or just that everything will go wrong. I'm such a paranoid freak. goddd. lol. so tomorrow, natalie and tara and I will spend most of the day getting myself ready...I wish I could see miss bethany tonight but she has a game (good luck with that eh?) so it won't be possible. brianna is heading off to a party as well...growing up so fast that kid is. I'm not worried about her, she's in 7th grade...still capable of making good decisions. so that is that. I hope you all have a wonderful candy day and stay safe and sober....or not so sober. comment please and thank you. all my love.
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13 pretty/ please
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| skidamarinkie dinky dink |
[27 Oct 2003|01:10pm] |
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well it has indeed been a while since I last updated...well a while for me wince I usually update daily. anyway friday was awesome...beth picked me up and we went to the movies, I saw kill bill with chris and that was completely weird...I don't suggest it. afterwards we hung out outside and watched the numerous fights and blake and I talked and that was cool too. mother picked beth and I up and she stayed the night and we had a grand time (read about my sleep talking on her blurty...priceless I tell you.) Saturday we slept in late and talked a lot...we went to her house for a while to get some stuff because she was staying the night again...also we ate left over mac and cheese. mother picked us up and we went to blockbuster and rented detroit rock city and the matrix...both amazingly good movies. We were going to have people over because mother was out for the night but that plan fell through and it was a good thing because mother's car got broken into and she came home early. so we were up late on saturday watching movies and talking online and sunday I got up, took a shower, and ate something. I called emily and confirmed our plans for going to the zoo and mother came and got beth and I and we took her home then went to pick up emily and made our way to the zoo. it was a whole ton of fun that I don't care to type out every detail about. we had a picnic. so AFTER the metal tiger had molested me emily's dad came and picked us up and I went home and slept a nice sleep. today I woke up and didn't feel 100% great and mother said I could stay home but I ended up here instead...I'm not complaining, it's been a good day. but it's so fucking cold. at lunch, natalie and I pondered the meaning of "skida-mar-ink-e-dinky-dink" and I will be confused about that all day. tonight I've gotta run to the library and then I'll probably come home and sleep some more. comment please and thank you. I love you all so very much and I hope you have a wonderful day.
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4 pretty/ please
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| aids.. |
[23 Oct 2003|01:22pm] |
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a man speaking of aids testing |
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hey everyone! I'm in aide and all the sophmores are in here learning about aids. haha. what the hell man...tara is at home sick (I just called her) so I'm all alone. it's a thursday and it started out horribly but that only lasted an hour. I woke up and mother and I got in a huge fight but then I got to school and found a red rose in my locker from my increadibly thoughtful boyfriend...wow everything has just been getting better since then. yesterday zach picked tara and nat and I up and we went to taco bueno and then to tara's house where we went on a walk and talked alot and just had a good time as always. we went to 180 and also had fun, pastor eric did it so it was better because I hate pastor blaine. but it was still bullshit (haha beth I love you!) afterwards mother picked nat and tara and I up and took them home and I went home and fell asleep. Today after school jessica and I are going to go help the mexican children for community service hours and at 6:30 I have ballet. so humm...yea...I have nothing else to write about, I'm not hungry for once which is a miracle in itself. I hope you have a wonderful day. te amo.
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14 pretty/ please
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| same survay from a while back...different answers |
[22 Oct 2003|01:52pm] |
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I Want: taco bueno
I Have: more than I deserve
I Wish: my wishes came true
I Hate: myself sometimes...and a select few other things
I Miss: emily
I Fear: love
I Hear: my thoughts
I Search: I don't know..I don't do much searching
I Wonder: just what I did to end up where I am now
I Love: my friends
I Ache: inside
I Always: think
I Am Not: how some people see me
I Dance: thursdays and saturdays
I Sing: in my head...people would kill themselves if it was outloud
I Cry: often
I Am Not Always: a bright bottle of sunshine
I Write: not as often as I used to
I Win: when I try
I Lose: the things/people I really need
I Confuse: myself, and everyone around me
I Need: taco bueno
I Should: forgive
yes or no...
x. you keep a diary: Blurty
x. you like to cook: yea..but that doesn't mean I'm good at it
x. you have a secret you have not shared with anyone: yes
x. you're in love: no
x. you set your watch a few minutes ahead: yes
x. you bite your fingernails: sometimes
x. you believe in love: no
Who is...?
the prettiest female you know: erin tydings, natalie, emily, tara, jess, kala, rissa, kirby...everyone...god all my friends are beautiful
the weirdest person you know: emily, or myself
the loudest person you know: emily
the sexiest person you know: you'd have to beat that one out of me
the person that knows the most about you: emily or jaydee
your crush: chris
most boring teacher: currently? they're all entertaining in their own way.
WHEN YOU SEE THIS NAME YOU THINK OF...
Ryan: jasmine's next door neighbor
Rob: sexy guy with lip piercing
Drew: Dike
Stephanie: Dewane
Heather: beaner
Aaron: Hieber
Amy: shelby's mom
Will: From Pirates of the Carribean
Paul: Walker
Eve: ning
John: Middleton
Lauren: Brammeier
Alex: mexican
Dave: the wendy's guy
Justin: Dell
Cuddle or Make Out? Both...at the same time
Chocolate Milk, or Hot Chocolate? chocolate milk
Milk, Dark, or White Chocolate? milk and white
Vanilla or Chocolate? both
( in the past week have you.... )
Cried? yes
Helped Someone? I'd hope so
Bought something? yes
Gotten Sick? bad stomach ache
Gone to the Movies? yea
Said "I LOVE YOU" and meant it? to a friend
Written a Real Letter? No
Talked to an Ex? yes
Missed an Ex? yea
Written in a Journal? I am now
Had a Serious Talk? Yes
Missed Someone? yea
Hugged someone? Yes
Fought With Your Parents? of course
Fought With a Friend? Nope
Would You Ever..
1. Eat a bug? for money
2. Bungee jump? yea
3. Hang glide? Yep
4. Kill someone? probably
5. Have sex with someone you don't love? never
6. Kiss someone of the same sex? for lots of money
7. Have sex with someone of the same sex? hell no
8. Parachute from a plane? yea
9. Walk on hot coals? for money
10. Go out with someone just for their looks? no
11. For their reputation? No
12. Be a vegetarian? Yes.
13. Wear plaid with stripes? Yep
14. IM a stranger? Yep
15. Sing karaoke? Yep
16. Get drunk off your ass? Yep
17. Shoplift? sure
18. Run a red light? yea
19. Star in a porn video? no
20. Dye your hair blue? yea
21. Be on Survivor? No
22. Wear makeup in public? yes
23. NOT wear makeup in public? yes
24. Cheat on a test? Yes
25. Make someone cry? not on purpose.
26. Call your math teacher a motherfucker? hahaha yea...
27. Kick a baby? Never
28. Date someone more than ten years older than you? nope...not until I'm older
29. Cuss out a priest? haha yea probably
30. Take a job as a janitor? if it paid well
hey I just did a friends only entry so if you can't read my update on today I am sorry. blake if you read this thanks so much for my sign. I love you all. comment please and thank you?
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6 pretty/ please
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| she's in love with the world |
[20 Oct 2003|01:26pm] |
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click click click |
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hey everyone! I truely hope you all had amazing fall breaks, I know I did. yesterday we went shopping and to a sand castle competition in the morning. we went back to the condo and grabbed our bags and hurried to the airport where our plane left at 3:50. We spent the rest of the day on airplanes except for an hour hanging out in the houston airport. I got home at 8:10 and saw emily wilkenson in the air port...it was weird and ironic. lol. so then I went home and unpacked and called some people. School has been good today, I got here and gave emily her present (a captain hat) and she loved it and was screaming "I'm the captain!" all down the hallway...gotta love her. chris gave me a ring from florida, it's awesome...he's a sweet guy. second and third hours were the same as usual, in 4th nat and erin came and got me out of class and we walked around 2nd lunch for 25 minutes...it was a good time, no a great time. I'm hungry, I forgot to get lunch money...damn. there's a concert tonight that I think nat and I are going to go to...you are all invited, it should be fun. IM me for details. well I should be wrapping this up. have a great monday and I love you dearly!
p.s. I'm getting sick of this layout...does anyone have any codes I could have?
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4 pretty/ please
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| attack of the seagulls |
[18 Oct 2003|09:01pm] |
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ahhh man I've been having a fuckin awesome time. so lets see..yesterday I went to mexico for a few hours...that was an experience for lack of a better word. I spent the morning hours at the beach. today I got up and spent all day at the beach until an hour ago when we went to dinner and this really gross mexican place. It was me of course who had the brillant idea to feed the seagulls at the beach today and they attacked me (see link to pictures below) and mother sat back and took pictures and laughed at me but I assure you it was not funny at the time. they're really bad pictures but ya know...who cares? ANYWAY I leave here tomorrow afternoon and so in the morning we're going to do some shopping then to the beach for a while and then get ready to go home. the weather here is so fucking great...it's like in the 80s with a few clouds. haha. I hear it's cold at home which sucks. I hate the cold. I did get a tan here (exciting). well bree is being horribly annoying and making me get offline so I'll be wrapping this up. I love you all! look at the pictures and comment por favor.
www.picturetrail.com/xmoox
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5 pretty/ please
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| heaven...I'm in heaven. |
[16 Oct 2003|07:47pm] |
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the cosby show |
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wow. I am currently sitting in my VERY nice condo that is located 20 steps from the beach...ahh bliss. i was up until 3:30 a.m. today and I went to sleep for 30 minutes and then slept for the entire plane ride. we got to the airport here and had to wait a few hours for a rental car so I slept some more. then we finally go outside to get the car and we're attacked by giant mosquitoes which was hilarious. we threw everything into the car and left. we ran into a little rain which was nice...you know how I feel about rain...and stopped to get groceries and beach supplies. this whole place is just so...cultural? I don't know, it's great though. we got to the hotel and unloaded everything then headed out to go buy some beach towels after that we came back here and walked over to the beach where we spent a few hours. we found a jellyfish and me being the hardcore badass (haha!) that I am went over and put it in our sandcastle bucket...bree freaked out. but yea it was great. i love the ocean so much. SOOO MUCH. there are lots of creepy mexicans around...mother and bree and allison just walked over to the beach to catch crabs (no not the STD) I don't know what the hell they're thinking. tomorrow we're going horseback riding on the beach and then picking up tim at the airport and driving over to mexico to do some shopping I think. I'm really tired and it's only 8...lack of sleep will do that to you. well I love you all and hope you're doing well back home. comment please and thank you.
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13 pretty/ please
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| padre island...4 more hours. |
[16 Oct 2003|01:16am] |
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aloha. well tuesday was a good school day. I don't really want to type out the events of yesterday although I will say it was quite good. tonight tara and I went to 180...that was alright. I leave for padre at 5 a.m. so I'm just going to stay awake until then. tara can't go because of her grades so it looks like it's just gonna be me since mother has tim and bree has allison but that is completely okay...I could use some alone time on the beach (sigh I cannot wait) well I better go before mother catches me online this late. love you all have an amazing rest of fall break. I'll be back on sunday. comment because you love me?
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6 pretty/ please
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| a song by me |
[13 Oct 2003|10:20pm] |
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azure ray |
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I?ve said the words I?m sorry more times than I can count,
I worry that you don?t find me sincere,
Being so young how are we supposed to know what we feel,
But you have to first get lost to find yourself,
You are so far away for someone so close,
Trusting you is easy,
Yet loving you is terrifying,
Our lives are black and white horror films of loss and depression,
Somehow in you I find a small shred of color,
But you?re so far away for someone so close,
Always right, you always know,
How can you have so much figured out,
While I am bewildered,
My roads take me to dark caves of loneliness,
Whereas you know the shortcuts,
Making you so far away for someone so close,
You can make next door feel like miles and an hour seem infinite,
And only you know the way to my heart.
yea I wrote that a while back...I think it's okay. comment and tell me what YOU think. I love you!
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19 pretty/ please
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| ::smiles::: |
[13 Oct 2003|01:39pm] |
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talking to tara |
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wow it was a great weekend. so I think I left off where I stayed the night at tara's. we woke up on saturday and her friend melissa took us to sonic to get breakfast (yumm) then we got back and took showers and got ready. travis called and asked if we wanted to go to the mall so what's what we did. it was lots of fun. travis kicked through the dressing room door in sears and tried on chick jeans in there and in arden b and also in jc pennys. now that was some comedy. eventually him and mikie had to leave, we met up with tara's friend chad after that and hung out with him and some of his friends. then we were talking to the cute guy at chic-fil-a (where we are also applying for jobs) and andrew (tara's boyfriend) and chris come. so we shopped for tara's dress for the jenks homecomming dance and after that we all went to chris's house with him and andrew and hung out, ate pizza, and watched toy story. we figured out that I wrote a song for chris's band but I didn't know that he was in it, which is cool and creepy at the same time. at one point we were outside and andrew threw the soccer ball and it hit chris in the face...it was hilarious. once chris's mom got home, she took us up to nightmare and we met kyle there. it was more scary than last week but still not as good as last year. anyway I'm going out with chris now, I'll spare you the details of that. I am very excited about it though. After nightmare I went home and was up till around 5 and on sunday I woke up at 1 and tara called so I hurried up and got ready and she picked me up and we went to her house. sidenote: natalie is now going out with seth too which is awesome (I love you nat). andrew and chris came over around 4 and hung out for an hour or so. Once they left, tara's mom took us up to wal-mart and we had a HILARIOUS time there. we bought stuff to make shirts with and went back to tara's. they says "mmm...YAY!" on them and on the back they're going to say "oh...shreeveport". yea I'm excited. lindsay can't go to padre with me anymore (big tear) but tara might be able to. wow I cannot wait. school has been fun today, afterwards I'm going to natalie's and we're going to work at jazercise (yea rock on) alright well I suppose this is long enough. I LOVE YOU ALL. have an amazing day, I know I will.
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2 pretty/ please
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| fucking FUCK YEA |
[10 Oct 2003|11:56pm] |
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nick at night |
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hey everyone! wow tonight was amazing...completely amazing. so school was good, great in fact. afterwards tara and i rode the bus to my house where we ate some toquitos and nat picked us up and we all came here (tara's house) and hung out and got ready to go to the movies. Tara took 302579 hours to get ready. haha and it didn't help that she changed a million times. ANYWAY we got there and met up with the inola boys (doug, kiefer, william, and jeremy) where we all hung out and drove/walked around and finally ended up going to IHOP where the boys ate and i had a water and 10 packets of sugar. I know I'm crazy you don't have to tell me. after that we all went back to the movies and I mingled. tara went with this andrew guy to taco bueno and got us some burritos which I put in my rather large purse along with an assortment of other things. mother picked us up some time after that and brought us to tara's...we've been eating some more. haha. god I'm such a cow. I laughed so much tonight, wow I really love my friends. I wish emily wasn't grounded...she would have had fun tonight. tomorrow I think we're going to head to the mall to find tara a dress or a bra or something. lol. okay I'm half asleep anyway so I better get going. I love you all. comment please and thank you. sweet dreams.
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1 pretty/ please
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| this is my last resort |
[09 Oct 2003|01:29pm] |
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cheerful |
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talking to tara |
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aloha dears and dearestes. haha. yes it is in fact the dreaded thurdsay but it will be the third one in a row that has auctually been quite good. this will probably be a short entry...I want to get back to my game. yesterday counseling was alright, afterwards I went to tara's where her and natalie were then we went to 180 and had a ton of fun. miss beth was there and so was jay and seth. also all of the inola boys. lol. I had quite a large bit of fun. on the way home I didn't get to do the raffel (damn) but it was okay. like I said, today has been good for no apparant reason (2 hugs from him...joy of joys) after school tara and nat and lots of people including myself are going to the dollar theater. if you read this you should head up there too...shall be fun. Then I have ballet but I dunno if I'm gonna go yet. so anyway I better cut this short. I love you all SO FUCKING MUCH. have an amazing day.
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4 pretty/ please
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| hump day |
[08 Oct 2003|01:24pm] |
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 apathetic |
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has been an amazing day. I'm not completely sure why...it could be the huge hug I got from him or perhaps watching movies in first hour...nevertheless it's been good. apparantly this morning there was a big fight that I missed out on...humm..dissappointing but oh well, I got the details from people who were there. Tara and I just got back from delivering passes and we had to walk through the gym and guys were yelling at us and kyle mccoy goes "if there were more girls like that around, they'd have to call this place the city of angles"...aww he's the sweetest kid, when I see him, I'm going to give him a hug. so anyway it's been outstanding. Yesterday was nothing important so I don't think I'll write all that out. After school today I have counseling (joy...) and then I'm going to head over to tara's and chill with her and nat until 180 where we will go and have some more good times. my love life is still in that dry spell and I'm waiting for that prince charming that I see all the time to notice me. one day..."...he'll care about you so much and want what YOU want over what HE wants, and will NEVER make you cry. he'll love you for who you are. i promise he's out there." ahh the wise words of beth. I love her. I just want to find someone who will make me feel special because of me, not because he likes me. anyway I think I'll be going now to drink my sprite and play some games. haha wow I have a boring life. I love you.
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please
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