| 8:38p |
I dont believe what she had to say
cut cut cut cut insicion fucker.
you have some fucking nerve. fuck you... you dont understand. you couldnt understand... how could you when Im not even sure what is going on. Stop throwing it into my face, stop it stop it stop it
cut cut cut cut... get it away just please go away.. i want to go back to bed, never should have woken up today. never should have woken up to begin with. I cried today did you know that?! I fucking cried after months I fucking cried.. do you think I can deal with this today?! then what we go away and shit is left unresolved. Fuck you fuck you. I tried to be nice, bit my tongue and you, you make me feel like shit and I said nothing.
And you... god I try I try so hard to help you. But you pushed me away like he is pushing you away. It fucking hurt me but I still stood by you, I didnt complain.. So dont get mad at me please just dont become all silent and closed up. I cant loose you all over again.
I never should have woken up. my mother said she didnt love me today, again. my father just yelled at me, muttering I am stupid. And then my friends hurt me... thank you so much really thank you..
Im crying again... Im going back to bed... Im going back to the one thing that has never let me down, Im going back to cutting... sleeping and bleeding.. thats all there is anymore...
I want to leave all of this pain behind, but I need help... but everyone around me only digs the knife in deeper... Im going back to bed. |