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Ash

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[04 Jul 2005|12:49am]
1. Reply with your name and I will write something I like about you
2. I will then tell what song reminds me of you.
3. If I were to apply an o'clock to you, I'll tell you what it would be.
4. I will try to name a single word that best describes you.
5. I'll tell you the most memorable moment I've had with you.
6. I will tell you what color you remind me of.
7. I'll then tell you something that I've always wondered about you.
8. Put this in your journal.
4 gone goldfishing

[02 Jul 2005|02:05pm]
so i havent updated in almost 4 months SORRY! whoopsie? things have just been so INSANE that I havent really had that much of a chance too... i probably need to update the info and everything too since I now have a boyfriend of almost 3 months and so much has been going on. I feel more busy now that school is out than I did when i was actually in school... hoping things slow down a little. need to find a job and everything cause I just got a car today! so SIKED. alright well i need to go get ready to go out for the nightttttt. i'll try to stay updated and everythingggg! love you all!<3

Vicci_ we need to catch up SOON! it's been FAR too long since we've given each other updates! we'll talk soon! love you chicky!
1 gone goldfishing

[13 Mar 2005|10:09pm]
[ mood | bored ]
[ music | All That Jazz_Chicago ]

okay, so I so havent updated this thing in almost a month. sorry girls<3

Ive been doing pretty much nothing besides sleeping; eating; going to school; and doing drama stuff. trying to stay in touch with friends and everything.

I finally gave myself a break and stayed home friday, my first school day off since Sept. which i needed alot. and im glad I finally let myself just stay home and sleep.

hm. i have no idea what to write about. i havent done this in far too long. I'll update again soon.

<3 ash

1 gone goldfishing

*such a long week. [14 Jan 2005|05:57pm]
[ mood | bored ]
[ music | Write This Down_George Strait ]

just so you all know this journal entry will have a lot of venting and bitching, and will probably be really long....so you might not want to read it....

Monday_ i have no idea what I did. Went to school like usual, and then stayed after for a set design meeting for competition and went and saw my algebra teacher, god what an idiot. SO i went to talk to her about possibly switching out of her class since Im failing and Im improving a little but not alot. So she was like well I'll think about it and we have to get it approved by the department head and blah blah blah, hmm in one ear and out the other, i just want out of that class so bad. My teacher is an idiot and I dont understand ANYTHING that we do. blah.

Tuesday_Was alright to an extent went to school took a quiz in algebra, did terrible cause I thought i was doing it wrong and found out i was doing it right like a minute before she told us to put our pencils down. SO pissed. so i only got part of it. um then had my other classes. didnt really do much that i can remember. then I came home and sat online like always. read something this girl caitlin wrote about my "close friend" Kyle and a comment she wrote back to my cousin, and spazed out. And commented back to her, and she flipped out on me and told me that Kyle told her that me and him arent close anymore and that we hadnt been friends since elementry school, even though to my knowledge we've been friends SINCE elementry school and we're still friends. So i said something to him about it and he said that what he told caitlin was true, and I cried. ALOT He hurt me so freakin bad, and he doesnt understand it at all. I told him that I think i was wrong about our friendship because of what he said to caitlin and he said that I was right and that we'll always be close. I was so lost, how can what he said to Caitlin be true, but still say we're close? whatever. so he apologized for hurting me, yadda yadda yadda... havent talked to him since... Plus he managed to hurt more than me in this whole thing, Me, Lindsay and Nicole. Yeah he's not close with ANY of us anymore according to him, yeah okay then buddy. thanks for the illusion of a friendship we had then eh? ... hmm.. anyway

Wednesday_I was completely out of it. Upset I didnt want to have anything to do with anyone or anything. So i walked around school like a zombie all day. Sat through classes just thinking and almost started crying more than once. Got a 17 page packet of review for my finance final on friday.. ugh just more stress.... Then lindsay and Erik werent in school so I got out of school NOT knowing Erik wasnt in school so i called his cell twice and was like wtf? so i called my aunts house and Kristina told me that Erik didnt go to school, so it was pouring out, and at the time I had no way of getting home besides walking so I started crying because of everything that had been going on, i just broke down sitting outside of school, while i was on the phone with Kristina, then my aunt said she'd come and get me, I didnt even realize she was home. So she came and got me and brought me home, and brought trouble, hehe. which was good, the doggy made my day. :-) hmm didnt do much.. worked on some stuff for school. whateevverrrrrrrr.

Thursday_I was def better than wednesday but I felt like crap all day. got a TON of homework.. 4 sections of history, 3 things of for algebra. so i came home and went to bed and didnt get up till 730, bad idea. So i got up got something to eat and then worked on my algebra stuff and history sections untill 11. and took medicine and went back to beddddd.

Today_TRIED to get up to go to school and it wasnt going so well. Taking benedryl at 11pm isnt a good idea, you cant get up in the morning. haha. that was such a bitch. so i finally got up. and managed to get to school, lol. Hmmm took an algebra quiz still half dead cause the benedryl hadnt worn off yet which was kinda of amusing. hmm went to psychology and we did review because we're having a test on tuesday. history we got all out 1st term papers back and we got a bunch of information to start a review sheet for our final which is friday.. (final #2)..and I believe my psychology final is that day too, so yay 3 finals on the same day. what a freakin blast!.. not.... hmm so 4th me and Ash "Sr" worked on our final project and finally got everything to work, with the help of Ferrell Locke, Garcea and Dave. and we were all excited because were going to finish it tuesday, (yes i said WERE.. i'll get to why we arent finishing it later)... so 5th period me and Vanessa worked on our set design (class) project and decided everything we're going to do over the next week since we dont have class..... hhmm then we had a drama club meeting and they decided to do Feb-Fest SO freaking happy! but it now interfers with competition which shall be a pain in the ass. but hey WHATEVER we're doing Feb fest so its all good. :-) hhmm.. so after the "surprise drama club meeting" we went to the design meeting, and then Ash "Sr" walked in the room and goes "hey ash look what i found" and held up the 3 pieces of our project that took over an hour to get to work on. Someone from the drama club tore apart our project and then tried to hide the piece... SO FUCKING PISSED. How the hell does someone do that? Its such bullshit. Me and Ash went OFF. And everyone just stood there watching us spaz out, Pj tried to tell us to calm down and Alex tried huggin me to get me to calm down, it didnt work though. I was PISSED. and I still am. So Ferrell Locke and Garcea decided that we dont have to re-do the project, and Ferrell Locke said he was just as pissed about it as we were. ugh. im so sick of doing stuff for other people and getting treated like shit for it.....

anyway i think this update is long enough. ill update sooner or later.

1 gone goldfishing

so random.. but oh well... [01 Jan 2005|04:31pm]
[ mood | exhausted ]
[ music | ims & the pats game ]

hhmm... Happy New Year everyone, there isnt much for me to update about. This vacation has been good. A lot of shopping and hanging out with Tammy and Lindsay. Saw Katie at the mall when she was with Griff, other than that we didnt hang out, which sucks since I havent seen like anyone from her house since August when we got back from Florida, we need to chill sometime. hhmmm I never hung out with Samantha either... hhmm.. i'll see her monday. :-) I didnt do any of the make up work i should have done over the past week which means I'll spend tonight and tomorrow working on all of it so that I can give it to Ms Murphy monday, I def wont finish the project but I'll get all the other work I need to pass in done.... once I find my book and bag.. in my disaster of a room. hhm....Last night was fun, I hung out with Lindsay, Erik and Brian. Erik fell asleep and we painted his toe... then he woke up. oh well. :-) hhmm... we did the drinking thing, a little, her mom knew we were drinking, so its not like we got trashed or anything... hmm... Dana went out and got trashed I guess. Hung with some girl? who knows. I have no idea who she is.. hhmm.. whatever. lala.. i dunno.. not in the mood to update.. Happy New Year everyone..... thank god 2004 is over....

Rip
Tim Delaney. :-(

1 gone goldfishing

[26 Dec 2004|02:11pm]
[ mood | bored ]

hhmmm merry christmas everyone, I havent updated in a while. So christmas was good, not a bad day not an EXCELLANT day either, whatever. haha. anyway i guess i'll just update on what i got.

+3 pairs of pants
+2 white tank tops
+an orange tshirt that has a monkey and say "blah blah blah, im not listening"
+an orange sweater to go over it
+a sweatshirt & sweatpants from aeropostale
+2 rings
+a necklace
+an electronic organizer
+2 books (The Girl who loved Tom Gordon & The Da Vinci Code)
+a facial mist thing
+$65 dollars (20 from my aunt, 25 from Doug, & 10 from my grandmother)
+a duckie puzzle
+cotton candy chap stick
+make up
+candles
+perfume
+ a duckie rattle that quacks :-)
+ the family got 4 movies (spiderman; spiderman 2; harry potter and the prision of azkaban; and idk the other one)

oh man i dunno if theres anything else their most likely is stuff Im forgetting but oh well, i got spoiled this christmas, whatever.

gone goldfishing

Santa. :-) [17 Dec 2004|11:02pm]
[ mood | amused ]
[ music | Bad Santa ]

conversation w/santa )

gone goldfishing

[15 Dec 2004|06:29pm]
[ mood | bored ]
[ music | All I have_J.LO & LL Cool J ]

stuff has been hectic and crazy, and has sucked for the MOST part, though there have been some good things that have been happening lately.

Ive been wicked stressed out with school, especially algebra and psychology.. algebra i have a 51.5 and im missing a ton of work in psychology that I have to make up or Im going to screw myself over in the long run, so yeah thank god there isnt too much drama stuff going on lately. anyway i dunno what else to update on.. so ill end this here and update when I actually want to update about stuff. :-)

gone goldfishing

[14 Dec 2004|04:48pm]
[ mood | blah ]
[ music | Nasty Girl_Nitty ]

hhmm.. so I havent updated in like 10 days so I figure its about time I write at least something... um not too much has been happening been going to school, staying after school to do stuff for drama and everything like i usually do, coming home doing homework and talkin to friends, well at least some of them, there are a few I havent talked to in like DAYS, hmm. whatever. =]um, tonight Im going to the school concert which shall be fun. :-) Good luck my lindsay! ... hmmn then i dunno whats going on tomorrow or thursday, and friday I believe Im going out with tammy & dana. :-) hhmm.. heh.hhmm.. i dunno what else to update on, nothing to fun has been happening, and i dont feel like talkin about all the bad crap going on at the moment. :-) ill update again sooner or later.

1 gone goldfishing

:-)....happy [04 Dec 2004|02:08am]
[ mood | happy ]
[ music | Independence Day_Martina McBride ]

hhmm, havent really done much this week...been going to school, stayed after monday, tuesday and friday and then actually got to come home thursday and friday(today) hehe! i was so extremely excited about that! lol. umm me and dana have been talkin alot. *major smiles :-D* lol. Im such a dork. anywhhoooo! After like a month of just talkin on the phone and crap, we finally hung out tonight. :-) We went skating, and I actually had fun. :-) hhmm... oh man I was so happy like ALL night. :-) *siiighhh* oh lord. anyway. heh. Tomorrow Im get to SLEEP! wahoooo! then Im going to Sam's party from 530-11. hehe It shall be fun and a good escape from the usual crap. :-) ummm yeah other than that there isnt too much to update on, plus thats a pretty UNDETAILED version of this week. lol. Ill do a better update soon, promise. :-) love you girls.

gone goldfishing

[25 Nov 2004|11:16pm]
[ mood | confused ]
[ music | the news & my sister talkin ]

iiimmmmmmmmmm baaaaaacccckkkkkk!

okay so after that busy schedule last week, I finally have time to update since we have like 5 days of school off. :-) wahhooo! hmm. im not gunna update about last week. ill just say it was a long, exhausting, STRESSFULL week, that Im glad is finally over. :-) so yes

HAPPY THANKSGIVING EVERYONE!

today has been an alright day. my dad got to come home from the rehab center for a few hours to eat dinner with us all and just to get out of that wretched place for a little while, which was awesome. I was so upset when I didnt think he was going to be home for thanksgiving. He seems like he's doing so much better than he was before, so HOPEFULLY he'll be permenantly home for christmas, which I'll absolutely love. haha. tomorrow is black friday. hmm i dunno if im going shopping with my mom yet or not, I might, havent decided yet. Juniors pants. Filenes. 12.99 <---awesome deal right there. I might go just to get pants. :-) oh yes. haha. umm.. other than that shit with adam absolutely sucks and Im not getting into that. so yeah. Ill update again soon. love you all

gone goldfishing

Going Haitus.. sry guys [13 Nov 2004|11:10pm]
[ mood | bored ]
[ music | Tammys Voice :-) ]

Okay here's the deal. Im gunna busy as hell from now till the 22nd. So Im not going to be updating till probably then.

Schedule

Nov 14th: Drama Rehearshal 2-10, come home go to bed
Nov 15-19:
*-->> Up at 540
*-->> school by 7ish
*-->> classes till 2:09
*-->> sets for the play until 3ish
*-->> drivers ed from 3-5
*-->> an hr break to get food or something
*-->> back to school for drama rehearshals from 6-10.

Nov 20th: um.. i dont think I'll have to be in school till 530 so I MIGHT get a chance to update then depending on whats going on You know how much hw I have to do and how long I decide I want to spend talking to the friends I wont be able to talk to all week... ugh.. :-(

Nov 21st: gotta be at school by 130 and hopefully that night Ill be home by 8ish or something like that so I can get some sleep. :-)

Nov 22nd
*-->> Up at 540
*-->> school by 7ish
*-->> classes till 2:09
*-->> start takin down the set from the play
*-->> drivers ed from 3-5
*-->> Back to sets to see if they're still takin stuff down and help some if they are, if not, change or something and then go to Teresa's NHS induction thing.
*-->>Come home around 830ish..do homework and HOPEFULLY be in bed by 10ish so i can ACTUALLY get some sleep.

so the next REAL update wont be till probably the 23rd unless I get a chance NEXT weekend. You WONT get an update at all from this update till friday. sorry. I cant be worrying about trying to update, on top of everything else. Umm. thats all really. I'll try and talk to you all next weekend. Add I'll do my best to do some commenting on journals... but IM NOT PROMISING ANYTHING!

love you all. :-)
Ashley

1 gone goldfishing

Going Haitus.. sry guys [13 Nov 2004|11:10pm]
[ mood | bored ]
[ music | Tammys Voice :-) ]

Okay here's the deal. Im gunna busy as hell from now till the 22nd. So Im not going to be updating till probably then.

Schedule

Nov 14th: Drama Rehearshal 2-10, come home go to bed
Nov 15-19:
*-->> Up at 540
*-->> school by 7ish
*-->> classes till 2:09
*-->> sets for the play until 3ish
*-->> drivers ed from 3-5
*-->> an hr break to get food or something
*-->> back to school for drama rehearshals from 6-10.

Nov 20th: um.. i dont think I'll have to be in school till 530 so I MIGHT get a chance to update then depending on whats going on You know how much hw I have to do and how long I decide I want to spend talking to the friends I wont be able to talk to all week... ugh.. :-(

Nov 21st: gotta be at school by 130 and hopefully that night Ill be home by 8ish or something like that so I can get some sleep. :-)

Nov 22nd
*-->> Up at 540
*-->> school by 7ish
*-->> classes till 2:09
*-->> start takin down the set from the play
*-->> drivers ed from 3-5
*-->> Back to sets to see if they're still takin stuff down and help some if they are, if not, change or something and then go to Teresa's NHS induction thing.
*-->>Come home around 830ish..do homework and HOPEFULLY be in bed by 10ish so i can ACTUALLY get some sleep.

so the next REAL update wont be till probably the 23rd unless I get a chance NEXT weekend. You WONT get an update at all from this update till friday. sorry. I cant be worrying about trying to update, on top of everything else. Umm. thats all really. I'll try and talk to you all next weekend. Add I'll do my best to do some commenting on journals... but IM NOT PROMISING ANYTHING!

love you all. :-)
Ashley

gone goldfishing

[10 Nov 2004|06:04pm]
[ mood | bored ]
[ music | Sugarcult_Killing Me ]

hhhm... this is pretty much just goin to be a pretty basic update cause it's been too long to update on everything thats been going on.

so shit has been kinda crazyyyy lately. School, drama, drivers ed, and sometimes back to drama, dependin on what time Mr Walker lets us out od drivers ed. So im usually at school from a little after 7am till sometime between 5 and 6. Then I come home do homework which has been crazy as shit lately. Ive been talking to Dana alot lately too, which is pretty cool, though Adam hates him, oh well.. yes for those of you who dont know, Dana is a boy. lmao. He's pretty cool, we spend like hours on the phone.. heh.. oh well. No i dont like him, though Ive been told by 2 people he likes me.. hhmm nothing will come of it...i think?... hhmm.. stuff around here hasnt been to peachy. My dads in a rehab place thingy or whatever, and I havent seen him in almost 3 weeks, and I talked to him today for the first time in like 2 1/2 weeks, and since Im definately the biggest daddy's girl its been hard as hell to get through the past few weeks. :-\ ... hhmm what else is there to update about? idk. im not goin into details with anything so this is just a basic update. I'll try and update more. :-) and I did a lot of commenting earlier too. so I think Im pretty much caught up with that? i'll update soon.<3

Ashley

1 gone goldfishing

*i still miss you babe... [31 Oct 2004|12:14pm]
[ mood | bored ]
[ music | I dont wanna miss a thing_aerosmith ]

i got bored and stole this from nicoleeeee!

survey )

1 gone goldfishing

[17 Oct 2004|08:17pm]
[ mood | numb ]
[ music | Man on Fire ]

And things just keep getting worse.....

So my day was alright till a little while ago... we cant find my cat Alex..its like once I get used to something ELSE going wrong.. ANOTHER thing happens to get to me again...it's all just piling up...1st my dads in the hospital... then paws dies... then my dad goes back into the hospital.. then i find out mike died...then 2 days later I find out sean's brother died.. then i have to go to mike's wake.. and now alex is fuckin missin.. i dont know how much more Im suppose to take and how much longer Im suppose to stay strong, cause I wont last very long..

i dunno, maybe Im suppose to just break down and let it all out? Just sit and cry for a while or scream about everything and just let SOMEONE know how I feel right now, but I cant. Its like I wont let myself. I've built up walls that are so strong and so high around myself so that people wont be able to tell how completely broken I am, that I cant even break them apart myself anymore to let everything I feel out. I mean I know I need to, but I havent done it in so long that I dont even know where to begin or what or who to turn to. Im not used to talking to people about all my problems because for so long I didnt have anyone to turn to, and now that I know I can turn to people, and I have people to trust with all my feelings and I know they wont use what I say and do against me, I dont know how to talk about stuff anymore... I let people in on some stuff, but on other stuff.. its like where do i begin? what do i say? how can I even describe how Im feeling to this person. And when I figure it all out, I think about it and Im like ugh, that makes it sound like Im that girl who needs attention or whats everyone to feel bad for her, so I just dont say anything. Everything is just piling up and Im not getting anytime to deal with one thing before something else happens, so I dont even really know how I feel about alot of the stuff thats going on because its like I find out something happens, and then within DAYS something else happens so I dont have time to take in the stuff thats ALREADY happened.... :-\ ... too much is happening right now.. ugh...

1 gone goldfishing

[14 Oct 2004|09:30pm]
[ mood | depressed ]
[ music | Mike and tammy talking ]


THE ULTIMATE SILENCE
October 12, 1998




Listen to the mustn'ts, child.
Listen to the don'ts.
Listen to the shouldn'ts,
The impossibles, the won'ts.
Listen to the never haves,
Then listen close to me ...
Anything can happen, child.
Anything can be.

~ Shel Silverstein


Six years ago today, Matthew Shepard was murdered for being homosexual.

What will you do to end the silence?

Click here to post this on your own page or weblog
gone goldfishing

Rip.. again [13 Oct 2004|03:24pm]
[ mood | confused ]
[ music | Vindicated_Dashboard Confessionals ]

Rip Michael Latham

Forever loved and missed<3
gone goldfishing

thank you. [12 Oct 2004|05:42pm]
[ mood | contemplative ]
[ music | Garth Brooks_Two Pina Coladas ]

hhmm.. i dont have much to say right now cause I have sorted out my thoughts for the day, but i do want to say a quick thank you.

Thank you to everyone who has given me advice over the last week and has been so overly supportive and patient with me. Its been a hard week for me to get through.

Thanks; Linz, Tammy, Samantha, Krystle, Teresa, Mike, nd Kyle.
I love you guys. i wouldnt have been able to do it without you.

gone goldfishing

[08 Oct 2004|11:59pm]
[ mood | okay ]
[ music | White Houses_Vanessa Carlton ]

Showing up 1/2 way through the 1st inning
Getting a migraine headache and being exhausted
has all been worth going to the Red Sox Game.
I just had the best night in the world. :-)

1 gone goldfishing

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