Greg's Blurty

It's Friday, You Bastards
Boy, The Nighthawk (http://www.coasttocoastam.com/george/about.html) is trying really hard to buy my vote for Coast Host Of The Year. I don't know how Ian and George are going to beat this morning's edition...unless they already have. I don't know, it's hard to remember all the shows that should get the host the top award.

I think it may be on purpose, too, because the Illuminati have their grimy little hands in everything, so why wouldn't they be manipulating this contest, too? You know what? I'm sick of the whole thing! This just might be the year that I write in Ron Paul, even though he has never, as far as I know, hosted an episode of Coast (But odds are good that he did because almost everyone in North America hosted at least twice during one or more of Art's 22,473 retirements) but why should that matter?

He'll damn well straighten out the expense account abuses that are plaguing the show and are rippling through the entire network before spilling out into the entire economy where they ruin the credit markets, the investment banks and the stock market. And isn't that what counts?

Damn right it is! Enough about politics, though. This is Friday and we have a party to get started. A party with no theme because the Theme Committee called in sick. All 37 of them came down with a sudden illness that made them sleep late and then want to go out and get pedicures instead of going to work, so I invoked my right, as The Commander Guy, to order that the theme be Giving Greg Everything He Wants but the Politburo voted it down and I bet the Illuminati was behind that, too!

So we're just going to make the best out of what we've got. And that would be a houseful of people, lots of booze and plenty of food. And no theme but we're ignoring that part. So, let's get to the guests...and some of you are going to say this is synchronicity...but you're ridiculous because synchronicity is just a stupid meaningless term that doesn't mean or explain or even define anything that is only used by idiots but if you believe in it, I'm not cutting you down or anything.

I'm just instructing to go in the library and sit quietly with your leader. Carl dropped in this afternoon to play chess and he's still trying to figure out how I beat him three games in a row, because he's a pretty fair chess player. Maybe if he wasn't so preoccupied with inventing and propagating empty absurd theories, he would figure out my secret weapon: Bobby Fischer in another room watching the game on CCTV and feeding me moves through a wireless ear piece.

He would still lose because there are few people who can deal with moves like, "Move your horsey to the third square from the top and take his tower thing (that was the move that won the second game for me)," but at least he would know why he was losing. Anyway, let's get back to our guests and for want of a real word, we'll say that it was synchronicity that caused Elvis, John Lennon, Buddy Holly, The Big Bopper, James Dean, Roy Orbison, Jimi Hendrix, Jim Morrison, Janis Joplin and Mama Cass to drop in this morning because they wanted to listen to Coast with me.

Where's the synchronicity in that, you ask? It's just another dull ordinary boring Friday morning at your house and now I'm kicking myself because I was dumb enough to come in here and I now I have to listen to the whole pointless story, you say? Well, you wouldn't say that if you had listened to this morning's Coast because R. Gary Patterson was on and they talked about about a lot of them, especially Elvis.

The we started drinking and then Carl Jung came over and you know how much rock stars like chess and then one thing led to another and now they're all staying for the party. The party that has no theme. Because everyone is selfish and self absorbed but me! Especially the Politburo!

Fifi suggested that Rock And Roll Idols be the theme and some people have adopted it but without the approval of the Theme Committee, it isn't official and it doesn't count. That didn't stop her from inventing this drink, though:

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Guitar Fuel #2

Ingredients:

* 2 bottles Champagne
* 4 L White wine
* 1 bottle Vodka
* 1 bottle Gin
* 1 L Pineapple juice
* 2 L Orange juice

Mixing instructions:

Mix all together in a 10 litre punch bowl.
Creator/contributor's comments:

Ingredients may be varied to taste. Coloured food dyes may be added for visual effect.

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Now, Fifi originally envisioned this as a punch but Jim Morrison decided that it was really an individual drink and the idea caught on and now everyone is drinking them. The ten liter glasses are a little unwieldy but people are adjusting to that. Jim has had three of them already.

So that was my dull, ordinary Friday that's culminating in this dull, ordinary party. Go mingle a little because it probably isn't boring as it looks. I'd stay with you but this girl in a ballerina outfit who just gave me a Heineken says she isn't going to give me any more Heineken's if I don't pay some attention to her. She's probably bluffing but I can't afford to take that chance. Why is everyone selfish and self centered but me?

Current Mood: depressed
Current Music: Robert W. Morgan, KHJ Los Angeles October 1968