Tuesday, October 7th, 2008

Time	Event
2:59p	This Can Be A Good Concert If Bruce Doesn't Sing You'd think that for $10,000, you wouldn't have to hear Bruce Springsteen sing...OK, I guess he could do one of his three decent songs and you really have to admire his ability to create an entire career out of a catalog that contains 99.99% B sides...when he appears with Billy Joel at the Concert For Obama (http://www.huffingtonpost.com/2008/09/30/springsteen-joel-to-hold_n_130545.html) in New York City on the 16th of this month. Don't take that the wrong way, because Bruce is great at everything, except writing songs and he's really especially good with politics. But he can't write a good song to save his life. Actually, as I said just a second ago, it's not quite that bad because he has three good songs, one of which is Dancing In The Dark and I can't remember what the other two are and I hope he does play them but just those three. And then he should just play backup for Billy, who can play for hours without running out of really good songs and talk politics. Politics is what he does best and that's what I would pay ten thousand dollars to see him do. But musically, he just has right around 18 minutes worth of good material. And then I would go out drinking with him after the show because he's great at that, too. And he attracts people like Billy Joel. You can't ask for much more than that. But, all things considered, I'm not going to go to this one...and not just because I can no longer afford to pay $10,000 for a concert ticket because it turns out that the economic bailout plan has a few Patriot Act like surprises in it, like enabling my broker to send me a bill for a billion dollars to cover all the risky and dangerously stupid things she did and I'm glad to pay it because I'd do anything for America. That's just a secondary factor, though. The primary reason is that I'm afraid that Bruce will stop talking about politics, pick up his guitar and perform more than the three good songs he has that are good. Even though I love seeing Billy live. And I really wouldn't mind hanging out with him, Barack and Bruce (As long as he isn't singing!). I just can't take the risk of being subjected to every substandard song he's written over the last forty years. Now, if it was Billy Joel and Bob Dylan or Elton John or Paul McCartney or Ringo or Elvis Costello or Paul Simon or Mick Jagger...well, there are a lot of good possibilities for an awesome concert but not Bruce. Bruce is like Willie Nelson and John Melloncamp...great people with great politics but that's what they should stick to because they are lousy song writers. So I'm skipping this one. And if you go, know that my prayers are with you and maybe, just maybe Bruce will limit his singing to his three good songs. And if the worst happens, at least you get to see Billy Joel and that will take some of the sting out of it. Current Mood: depressed Current Music: Coast To Coast AM----Monday October 6th, 2008 (Comment on this)
5:40p	Because It's Easier Than Doing Any Real Writing Could​ you date someo​ne with a kid? I'd thought you'd never ask! You are so not going to regret this! It's going to be economical too, because on Thursdays, kids eat free at Hooters. Could​ you date someo​ne who has a lot of issue​s?​​​​​ You're still embarrassed about your nymphomania, aren't you? Well, don't worry, because I am very tolerant of things like that. Do you have a best friend​ you can tell stuff​ to and you're sure they wont tell? Yeah, but not by choice. I'm only allowed, per regulations, to hangout with people who have Triple Class A Security Clearances and that isn't even enough because then I have to make them sign additional secrecy agreements before I can say anything at all. In triplicate. And then, just in case all that doesn't work, I have to erase all their memories afterward. And then there's more paperwork for that. It makes the small talk that you take for granted an ordeal that just isn't worth the effort most of the time. Something you're happy about? I'm happy that Russia finally left Georgia. I was afraid they were going to socialize Coke and peach pie and I'll tell you this much, it'll be a hot day in Stalingrad or a cold day in Atlanta, whichever. before I stand in line all day for a Coke! God bless America. What is wrong​ with you right​ now? According to Suzette, everything. But she's senile. The real answer is NOTHING IS WRONG WITH ME! I'm fine! It's all you people who are crazy! Do you own big sun gl​asses​? I am not planning on staging a coup d'état in any Central American country, Senator, if that's what you're getting at. Where do you come up with these crazy questions? Would​ you go in publi​c looki​ng like you do right​ now? No, because I'm wearing pants and I live in a nudist colony and it would just make me feel awkward and out of place. Would​ you kiss someo​ne to make your ex bf/gf jealous​us? Yes, I would, just like any responsible mature grown up would do. And then I would stay up late. Way way way past my bedtime. Are you in love with the perso​n who poste​d this surve​y? Nice try but no. Shauna posted this and it's common knowledge that her Master has lots of guns, so NO NO NO. If you're trying to kill me, you're going to have to do better than that. Have you ever felt replaced? How could I ever be replaced? Did you ever consi​der a model​ing caree​r? I consider it every time I do a nude scene. Because I'm tired of doing them for free. It would be so nice to turn pro and get paid for it at least once. Are you waiti​ng for anyon​e to call right​ now? Yeah. Her name is Jenny. I found her number on the wall, so I called her. She was out, so I left a message. I expect she'll be calling back any minute now. Do you fall for peopl​e too easil​y? Never. But you're different. I think it's your eyes. Or maybe it's your clothes. That is an awesome dress. Can I help you out of it? Do you find anyth​ing funny​? Right now, the economy. Especially the stock market. I love farces and this is better than Airplane. Have you ever cried​ from being​ so mad? I release my anger in healthy, positive, grown up ways. Like I have these foam rubber bricks that look just like real bricks that I throw at the TV. I also have fake vomit, pepper gum, cigarette loads and an ice cube with a fly in it. I fire my water cannon at people sometimes, too. Have you ever been in a perfect relationship? My half of the relationship is always perfect but she (And it doesn't matter which she it is, they are all the same) always messes up the other half. Who on your top have you had a sleepover with? None of them. What's wrong with them? Who would be better at a sleepover than me? Where​ was the last place you went shopping? Paris. I had to go there because I was out of French Toast. Then I had to stop in Rome for Italian Bread and then London for English muffins. Then, when I was halfway home, I remembered I was out of Spanish olives, so I had to turn around and go back to Madrid. I HATE grocery shopping! What was the last movie​ you watch​ed in theat​res? The Jazz Singer and I'm not going back till this talkie fad blows over. Anyon​e on your top that shoul​dn'T be? No, she should be there but she's angled wrong and it is making it difficult to type...so I guess to answer your question: She's basically fine where she is, she just needs to move a little to the left. Are you a cuddl​er? If that's what you're into then so am I! Last 3 phone callS​? Phones are useful for those who need them but I'm telepathic. Do peopl​e hate you? Hate is just another word for jealous. Who was the last perso​n to hug you? I never hug and tell. Have you ever kisse​d someo​ne named​ Jessica? I don't remember...but if you are Jessica and I have kissed you, you really shouldn't hold it against me. It's not that you're not memorable or anything, it's just that I don't remember you. So lets just forget the past by doing it all over again. When was the last time you were extre​mely disap​point​ed? It takes a lot to disappoint me and it's nearly impossible to extremely disappoint me. But, Ian Punnett managed to do it by failing to find and interview someone who makes robot strippers. Anybo​dy hurti​ng you? Yes, but there's always room for one more. And I like you so I'm going to skip the background check and drug test. You're hired! Is there​ a perso​n of the oppos​ite sex that means​ a lot to you? You're really good at this seduction thing. I don't know how, but you've worn away all my defenses. Just promise me you'll still respect me in the morning. Have you heard​ a song that remin​ds you of anyon​e today​? I heard Sympathy For The Devil this morning and it made me think of Suzette...except for the sympathy part. What were you up to at 11pm last night​ ? Nowhere that I wasn't supposed to be! Now let me out of these handcuffs. Unless you want play Police Brutality again...but you said I could be the prison guard next time, so any way you slice it, this is unfair! What happe​ned at 10:00 am today​? What didn't happen at 10AM today? That was the greatest 10AM ever! Are you in a good mood? All my moods are good and the sooner you learn that, the better! Do you belie​ve what goes aroun​d comes​ aroun​d?​​​​​ Yes, but it's unpredictable, so we need to legislate it. That's why I joined MAUK (MOTHER'S AGAINST UNPREDICTABLE KARMA). Who was the last perso​n you ate with?​​​​ I don't eat and tell but if you must have an answer, it might have been Jessica...I don't remember. What are you doing tomor​row? I'll follow the sun. Because it might rain tomorrow. Are you mad about anyth​ing? I'm not mad about anything but you. Now can I help you out of that dress? Do you have any bruises? Yeah, and I won't bore you with the details but I will say that you should be careful about where, when and to whom you say, "Is that your butt or do you have an aircraft carrier in your pocket?" Are you the same perso​n as you were at the begin​ning of 2008?​​​​​ Which 2008? Last perso​n you went swimm​ing with?​​​​​ I wish I could tell you but SI is very strict about things like this. You'll just have to wait till the swimsuit issue comes out, she's the one on the cover. Have you done anyth​ing you regre​t in 2008 so far? Not yet but I'm not worried because it's only October. I have lots of time left. Is there​ any emoti​on you're trying to avoid right now? Helplessness........but it keeps finding me. ​ What color​ shirt​ are you weari​ng?​​​​​ White Have you ever falle​n for your ex's best friend​d?​​​​​ Not that you know of. Would​ you go back in time if you were given​ the chanc​e?​​​​​ I don't see why anyone wouldn't. Would​ you live with someo​ne witho​ut marry​ing them?​​​​​ Sure. Who was the last frien​d you saw? I remote viewed all of them just a few minutes ago. How m​any TRUE frien​ds do you have?​​​​​ Myspace tells me: Your Network: 246,752,682 and I trust them, so 246,752,682. When was the last time you were truly​ compl​etely​ happy​ with your life? That hasn't happened yet. What's some thing​ that can alway​s make you feel bette​r?​​​​​ My time machine. When was the last time you talke​d to your numbe​r 1? Talking is fine for those who like it but I prefer telepathy. What will you be doing​ tonig​ht? It's going to be just another dull, routine night. Current Mood: depressed Current Music: Coast To Coast AM----Monday October 6th, 2008 (Comment on this)

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