Greg's Blurty

Doubting, Dreaming Dreams
COCKTAIL FACT

Though it's one of the most famous poems of all time, Edgar Allen Poe made a paltry $9 from the first publication of "The Raven."

http://www.idealbite.com/tiplibrary/archives/trashy-poem/

I'm thinking about using this little historical tidbit as leverage to force my agent, Drusilla to give me more money. Our current contract gives me $10 an hour when I'm not writing novels, scripts and/or short stories...well, it's not really a contract in the traditional sense of contracts, it's more a case of Dru telling me to shut up and write and just take the $10.00 an hour or she will drain every drop of blood out of my body and my body guards saying they will let her.

If I were the insane type, I would say that everyone is out to get me and I'm the target of a vast conspiracy but I know that there is a sane down to Earth rational explanation that doesn't involve crazy delusional paranoid fantasy's. Just like UFO's, crop circles and the Bermuda Triangle. I just haven't quite figured out what that sane down to Earth rational explanation is.

It might be swamp gas. Or flares. That can wait for later, though. My main concern right now is that Edgar got paid $9 to write a poem and that doesn't sound like much right now...it's not even ten lap dances...but remember this was in 1845 and $9 then is the same as $378.74 today.

And $378.74 is a lot of money! And he got it for writing one poem! Granted, it's kind of a long poem but how long could it have taken him to write it? Eight hours, maybe? I doubt if it even took that long but just to keep everyone happy, we'll use a very conservative estimate of ten hours. And by my calculations, he was paid $37.874/hr...in 2008 dollars, in 1845 dollars it would be 90 cents an hour.

And I think I should be paid at least that much. I also think that it would be easier on everyone if it were just rounded up to $40.00/hr because round numbers are easier to work with. And I'm not even saying that just to gain tons of Karma points for decomplicating the math for everyone concerned. I am saying it because I care about people.

And when I spend 8 hours not writing a novel...that's the typical time frame...I should get $320. And if I do that three or four times a week, I could make up to $1280 or even more. Sometimes I don't write for 12 or even more hours a day. And notice that I'm not even asking for over time. I'm not greedy.

I just want to make more than $1000 a week and I think I'm worth every penny. And I think I'm going to get it. How can Dru say no to these well thought out arguments? And if she does, well, in that case, no problem. I'll just to move to Plan B, which is to convince everyone who sells everything I buy to lower their prices.

Especially strippers. They have to be convinced to give lap dances for ten cents. And Mad Magazine has to lower its' cover price back to 20 cents. Candy bars have to go back to 10 cents and baseball cards have to return to five cents. There are other things, too, but those are the big ones.

I almost forgot, you people who make Diet Pepsi Max and Heineken have to go back to five cents a bottle. And if you don't want to, call Dru and demand that she give me this raise!

Current Mood: depressed
Current Music: Coast To Coast AM----Friday July 18th, 2008