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Saturday, June 23rd, 2007
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8:29p - ♥ It's Not A Side Effect of Cocaine Its Love..-F.O.B.♥ *Pringle*
Okay so Here's what's been happening since Last time,I Havent seen the Amazing person who brings out the Best in me & Makes me Happy since Last Saturday it's only been 1 week & It feels like months :( I Miss him so much!,Me & Matt had a really long talk yesterday when we were in a good mood on the way home He said he didnt like how i was being ill so I was like so do you not want to be together? & he goes you don't want to be & I just looked at him & smiled & he goes you don't do you? & I said no...then he didnt speak until after we got home & I was half asleep on the couch & he goes so are you leaving me or what? & I said I Was Unhappy at first he said I was on drugs b/c I Haven't been sleeping but that isnt why & then after we got that cleared up I told him I'd gave him chances & he knew I had been unhappy for a while now & He goes I don't want you to leave & I asked him why & he goes b/c Im not good with my emotions & I said that's why I can't leave? & he goes no I Love you & I don't want you to leave & I said it's too late for that you should have told me that 3yrs ago then he hugged me which btw I dont ever know of him hugging me ever & took my hands & looked at me & goes I Love you I don't want you to go anywhere,& yeah that's sweet & all but that would have helped along time ago when he was promising me he would change & he never did Im still leaving him I just don't know when yet it should be within the next week I just have to take care of some things first is all,the hardest part it taking Holly away from her daddy b/c I know she loves him it's just he's never really paied any attention to her not a diaper change no feeding her he plays with her some now but he can't even put her in the car seat or take her anywhere with him so I don't know it's just all confusing but Im not changing my mind & I've asked myself If this amazing guy wasnt in My life would I still want to leave him? & the answer is yes b/c I've been unhappy for a while I told him how I can't be myself around him or his parents he's done better when im around them & taken up for me & not let them say things outta the way but still it's too late I just don't feel the things for him I used to & this other person just makes my face light up everytime i see him sign in or when he speaks to me I can't describe the feeling all I know is I've not felt this in a long time & it gets better everyday,me & Matt also discussed Holly & he said he could never take her away from me which is good b/c that is the one thing I was really concerned about b/c she's my heart I Love her so much!,I just need to get a job & my license lol! then things will be so much easier well I guess im done now.....♥BrEeStEr♥..... ~*Pringle*~
current mood:  blah (comment on this)
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