Saturday, July 21st, 2007
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9:19 pm
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once again life is fucking crazy,since no one can read this as far as I know or at least not my family.....tonight was shitty I hung out with Bailey all day then around 7 I took Holly to my dads b/c yes I was gonna see Tony & I wanted to be alone with him since I never get to & anyways it was just me & him b/c Bailey left with Donnie so..then I hear the horn blow & Matt is outside.....yeah Tony's car is there & Matt is outside :( so I go downstairs & he's like what's tony doing here & im like he's not so i made up this whole lie about him being gone with Stephen either way Matt goes im tired of it & leaves then I finally get him on the phone he agrees to come back & get me so we can go & get Holly well anyways he's pissed & is limiting my time on the computer & wont allow me to speak to bailey basically everyone is pissed at her & its me that is the bad one!.....my dad hates me & so does my mom i dunno what the hell to do.....Life fucking sucks!
current mood:  crappy
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Friday, July 20th, 2007
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9:51 pm
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Okay I don't think I could be anymore confused I saw Tony again tonight I've seen him every weekend since I saw him at Monte De Rey except for 1 I feel so completely lost without him,The Past 2 Friday's we have stayed the night together & I Miss him I wanna fall asleep next to him I saw him tonight & he's just amazing I don't know what it is about him but I've fallen for him hard! his kisses are amazing I can't even begin to describe it,Im so attached to him & I Love him so much,I'd been depressed & cried every day since last saturday except today,being with Tony makes me sooo happy,Im never in a bad mood around him,I think I've found the one,even though I'd given up on that & thought that true love didnt exist im more than sure he's mine,Im gonna start trying much harder with everything so I can get out faster so I can be with him,he's one of the greatest things that has ever happend to me I havent found one flaw in him I mean I know he plays Video Games all the time & which most ppl would be annoyed by that but that is who he is & Your supposed to love someone for who they are & not try to change them it took me forever to realize that but i did a couple years ago,he says hes nerdy but he's my nerd & i love him with all my heart! well..Im just sad b/c Im used to being with him right now :( & now Possum Kingdom is on & Im sad b/c he sung this song Saturday night taking me home :(..I don't know what else to say I've already started to cry it sucks that im so attached to him b/c im terrified of getting hurt & i trust him when he says he loves me,but Im always gonna worry about other girls b/c girls have a way of getting you to do things & change your mind :( he completes me & makes me the happiest i've ever been with a guy,i think the main reason when i saw him it was like i knew him is b/c he's like what i've always wanted in my head if i had to think of the perfect guy it would be him,I found him when I wasnt even looking & then I see him & ever since then things have fallen into place like this was supposed to happen,well I guess im going to bed b/c I can't stay up Im sad :( hopefully I'll see him tomorrow b/c I can't stand being without him ......... ♥Pringle♥ ♥The Lovely *BrEeStER*♥
current mood:  blah
current music: Toadies-Possum Kingdom
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Sunday, July 15th, 2007
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9:23 pm - ♥♥♥
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So...This weekend was Suuuper freaking Crazy but Amazing!!! So Friday I already knew I was staying the night with Bailey b/c I had to see My ♥Tony!♥ He stayed the night with me but before I left Friday Matt already told me if I was staying to pack my stuff so I left it & Called him later that night & told him to leave the Door unlocked,So After ♥Tony♥Left We went & I got all my Clothes & Holly's then we went back to her house & everything was fine ♥Tony♥ Came at like 9 :D ahh I Love him Sooo Much!..I'll get into that in a little while though!....So he left to get something to eat & during that time Bailey & Donnie started fighting & then everything just got crazy I was freaked out Holly was scared & I wanted to leave finally when she said we could leave Donnie was just really freaking me out & I didnt want Holly to be in a situation where she wasnt safe had I known any of this would happen I would'nt have even had her there! anyways I didnt trust her to take me b/c I didn't know what was gonna happen I asked her if I could call Matt & Donnie said yes & Bailey said no & that she would tell Matt I was with ♥Tony♥...Anyways ♥Tony♥ ended up bringing me home anyway b/c Hollys safety was waaay more important than her telling Matt who i was with! but ♥Tony♥ was Sooo sweet & he is So Good with Holly & she really seems to like him & Im sooo Happy about that! :D My Mom met him & she liked him so Im happy about that too! I told Matt about ♥Tony♥ taking me to My Moms b/c Matt came & Picked me up,So even though I left I was gone im now somehow back home again I still am :( I hope his Parents are Happy b/c thats what they wanted here I was so freaking Happy Friday night I never though about Matt once after I called to make sure I could get My Stuff it was Just Me,♥Tony♥ & Holly b/c Bailey stayed with Donnie & I Loved it! & Omg I have to say even though I probably shouldnt on here b/c somehow everyone ends up seeing my stuff that ♥Tony♥Is Amazinggg! we had sex & I mean with the other ppl it wasnt ever like this with Matt it isnt like this but with ♥Tony♥ Its something I've never felt before My Hands Actually went numb to where I couldnt even really open then & My legs were numb & kinda shaky..I dont know what he does but omg it's the best feeling in the world he is amazing I never wanted to have sex with him this soon But Im really glad that I did b/c now there is just so many feelings I dont regret it at all It just makes me love him that much more!...I havent been this happy since my 1st b/f who I thought was my soulmate,but I think i just thought that b/c he was my 1st everything!...with Tony it's even better than with him the feelings are different he's all I think about I could be having the worst day in the world & just see him & everything would be okay,he is everything to me I have no idea what I would do without him he is sooo amazing to me & Holly both! I've fallen for him & it scares me to death b/c I've never really loved anyone like this & Im sooo scared of getting hurt...I know it seems wrong of me b/c im married but it's not like i was lookin for anyone b/c I wasnt I just seen him oneday & I had to talk to him something about him,I had to,Im sooo glad I did he is one of the best things to Happen to me Besides Holly,everything felt so right this weekend when we were with him nothing bothered me I wasnt stressed I was able to just let go of everything & then Im brought back into this I've cried all day Holly has been fussy & I just can't take it anymore I've wanted to leave since we first got Married anyway so this isnt because of ♥Tony♥ He's not the reason Im leavin he's part of it b/c now Im in Love with him & I dont want to be without him it hurt so bad not waking up beside of him this morning :( I mean he lets Holly sleep in the middle of us & he holds her & everything! what other guy would do that?!...well I guess I've wrote enough for now......♥BrEeStEr♥ .........I ♥*Pringle*
current mood:  calm
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Saturday, July 7th, 2007
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10:55 pm
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Last night was Amazing I stayed with Bailey at her G-ma's It was me her & Holly & some amazing peeps! :D next Saturday night is gonna be Amazingggg!
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Sunday, July 1st, 2007
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8:17 am - & To Be Completely Honest Your not Like All The Rest
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The Guilt is starting to catch up with me now I know i've done wrong I don't really regret the guy it's what I did this weekend I regret It's not that we did anything it's what I did to see him it just makes me feel like a really sucky person it's really hard being me right now everyone seems to be against me everyone thinks that Im terrible but if they lived in my life they'd know what Im talking about the only really good thing right now is Holly she is my everything I Love her more than anything! but yet my mom keeps telling me if matt finds out anything they can take her from me although I've been the one to look after he ever since the day she was born I've taken care of her helped her when she was sick i've been the one to change her,bathe her & feed her everytime! she is my everything! & somehow she tells me that if something happens between me & Matt the court could take her from me b/c I like this other guy? gahhhhh! I mean I know ppl will think maybe I should try & work things out with Matt but they don't understand I honestly have We've been together for 3yrs & Married for a year & I've tried maybe it's that he's not good emotions or affection which I can't tolerate b/c he's always putting me down like yesterday he was being really immature so I was like Matt you need to grow up & he goes me? have you ever heard you & Bailey together? I was like yeah but we only talk about ppl! & he's like yeah you 2 act like your beautiful & your not! & he tells me this kind of stuff all the time which kills me! & I tried to leave last weekend which I think I already wrote about & for that day he acted like he loved me but I don't wanna have to threaten leaving him for him to be nice to me & act like he loves me!..My dad is mad at me b/c I quit going to church which I know i shouldn't have b/c I didn't need to take Holly out but it's kinda hard to go to church & watch Matt's dad preach when I know what a dick he is at home & I know how fake he is how he beat his dog & his wife when they were first married but the dog thing was recent like last summer he talks about everyone behind their back which I do too but Im not a preacher & I never said I didn't talk about ppl! I know what I do is wrong & yes I feel bad I know seeing the other guy is terrible but it's nice to have someone to talk to that makes you feel happy & this guy makes me the happiest i've been in a relationship in a really long time & were not even together we just kinda connected,my mom hates him now b/c she says he dosent care about me & holly is he sees me now which i don't get that but whatever,I want to leave I really do & Im going to I just gotta get a job first so I can move out on my own im 19 I cannot go back & live with my parents I just can't! once you've been on your own you don't wanna be back under your parents control thats like saying i failed! which In a way I have sometimes I'd like to talk to Matt's ex wife to see how he was to her i mean obviously he wasnt good b/c he cheated with me which is kinda crazy I thought I loved him since I was 8 & always wanted to be with him & now that I have him it's just like ugggh your not at all who i thought you were I think that If his parents would have agreed to let us live together before we were married we wouldnt be in this situation I mean we already had a kid! what would it matter if we lived together but noooo! they were against it! I think that no matter who you are if you think you want to get married you should Always live together for at least a year or so before hand & if that works out go for it otherwise don't bother! but then again who am I to be giving advice? I meet this guy in Monte De Rey & suddenly I like Love him!...am I crazy?...nvm I know the answer to that!...I just feel terrible b/c sometime i don't see how it's soo bad I mean I really care about him & he seems to care about me & he likes Holly she seems to like him I don't wanna take her away from her daddy & he would never take her daddy's place I'd always let them see each other b/c I know she loves her daddy it's just I don't want her growing up like I did thinking there was no such thing as love b/c her parents always argued or never showed affection My Mom told me plenty of time there was no such thing as love or soulmates now suddenly Im 19 she & my dad are divorced she's gettin ready to get married again & she tells me he's her soulmate & there is a such thing as love...& here i am married & I don't exactly believe in it anymore....& if there is a such thing it's obviously not on your side,If i leave Matt then I won't be able to see this guy no one will allow me to see him unless Im legally seperated which takes 6months! ughhh! last night i cried so much i still have a headache this morning,matt & holly are at church which once again makes me feel & look terrible! I just don't know what to do anymore My Daughter comes first! I don't ever want to lose her I just wanna get out of this & Me & Her be on our own & not have to listen to all this I wan't to be able to be happy again I guess Im done now I don't know what else to say & I doubt Im Making sense.............♥BrEeStEr♥
current mood:  annoyed
current music: The Cure-Just Like Heaven
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Monday, June 25th, 2007
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8:12 pm - For all you ppl who talk about me,thanks for making me the center of your world! :D
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So...one again I have random ppl trying to start drama in my life...personally I think it's Hillarious!...ppl have nothing better to do with their life than to sit around & think of ways to screw up mine! :D so this morning when we got up to leave for Matt to go to work he signs in on myspace & he has this message from this random loser saying that im cheating on him haha! matt just ignores it & when he got home today we talked about it he's like you did tell him i don't care right? it's hillarious i think! but he's been making fun of me about Tony all night saying don't touch me tony lover lol! & when i almost fell asleep he's like you better not fall asleep you won't get to talk to Tony,it's been crazy but I think it's really gay how he sent matt that message but failed to mention how he was telling everyone he was dating me & telling my ex he had sex with me like eww he so wishes he could get this! ;) but yeah like what a dumbass like Matt knows all this shit that this guy has said & how he told ppl he was with me & things like that so why would he call him to ask him what im doing haha! it's crazy! he's just jealous i don't want to be with him & is trying to get back at me like seriously think about it do you honestly think that trying to break up my marriage will make me want to be with you??!! NO IT WONT!....some ppl seriously need to grow up but until then thanks for giving me some really good laughs LOSER! :D
current mood:  bouncy
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8:10 pm
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Saturday, June 23rd, 2007
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8:29 pm - ♥ It's Not A Side Effect of Cocaine Its Love..-F.O.B.♥ *Pringle*
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Wednesday, June 20th, 2007
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8:25 pm - ...
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Okay so let me get some thing's straight!...I do notcare what anyone else thinks about this!...Noone know's the Situation I am in therefore you do not have the right to pass Judgement on me!...Things have been bad with me & Matt for a while were basically friends living together for my Daughter & that's it!..now I never intended for all these people to see this I didn't realize the link to this thing was still on my myspace!..i could have sworn that I deleted it..but obviously I didnt!..I don't see how I am a ho for wanting to be happy!..I've not done anything with this guy I went to the Movies with him wow big deal people go to the Movies all the time!...Im not going to do anything with him b/c I don't want to do anything that would take my Daughter away from me she is my life & she comes first but I also do not want her growing up like I did knowing my parents are unhappy! I have tried to discuss all of this with matt but he changes the subject so I don't know what else to do I would like to be able to talk to him while were both in normal moods and are not mad or anything but he won't do it..I just don't know what to do anymore it's crazy but I dont want random ppl saying bad things about me when you clearly don't know what you are talking about....Im done!
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Monday, June 18th, 2007
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6:17 pm - ♥There's A Reason Why Certain People Meet♥
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Okay so Im like Suuuuper Happy!alot Has happened withing the past 4days thing I never would have expected! but Im really happy that they did...but Thursday Me,Matt & Holly went with His Parents to eat like we do Every other Thursday & I walked in Monte De Rey & in the corner was this guy this amazing guy lol! & we sat in the booth right in front of theirs so I got to look at him the whole time or as he says drool lol!...but yeah the whole time I was like god I soo like this guy & he had this chick sitting beside me which kinda made me a little sad but I knew I'd seen him on Myspace before so that night I messaged him!...I know gay of me but oh well!...anyways we ended up talking & went to the Movies with Bailey & His Friend Joseph Saturday night to see Knocked Up & I Had the Most fun I've had in A Really long time! We basically talked through the whole Movie & considering we'd never had a Convo before other than on here I though this is gonna be awkward but when we started talking it was like I'd known him forever lol yeah cheesy whatever but im serious!....usualy im looking for flaws & reasons not to like guys but honestly I didn't do that with him I was too busy talking & having fun I dont really know what happend through most of the movie except right at the end & when he pointed when they were having sex! lol! he's the most amazing person I think I've met In A really Long time! I feel like we just clicked & I miss him super bad he says he feels the same way & that he thinks there is something there b/c of how well we got along so this leaves me In a really suck situation which I don't mind b/c I've missed this guy like crazy ever since saturday! it's just something I can't explain sitting there Thursday night I would have never know all this would have happend by today (Monday) but Im really happy that It did....Me & Matt havent ever really been in love I don't guess it was always I thought I Loved him or something Just like at first I Loved him for his car lol but then we wrecked it that night & then he was less appealing & then I stayed with him then I got pregnant when we had been dating 4months & so ever since then I've felt kind of stuck I mean don't get me wrong I Love him but Im not in Love with him he's my Baby's Daddy I'll always have some feelings for him but not like he's my soulmate or anything...we just don't click it's not there,I know all of this makes me sound terrible but it's true I do feel a little bad b/c I miss this guy & think about him all day certain things smell like him & it gives me butterflies that hasnt happend to me in like forever! Im really scared he dosent feel the same way though,that would seriously hurt me but I would have to get over it eventually & I guess it would be payback since Im Married but I hope to god that dosen't happen! well I guess im done here for now...I guess I sound like a Major Bitch & A Major Whore...but you can't help what you feel for ppl everything happens for a reason! b/c even if I hadnt messaged him that night I saw him in wal-mart the next night & felt the same way so I would have anyway....well I guess im done now.............♥BrEeStEr♥ .... *Baconman* lol although Im not fond of that nickname Im not saying his real name so yeah!
current mood:  ecstatic
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Saturday, June 2nd, 2007
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2:56 pm - Bitch Please,If your gonna be Soo Too Faced at least Make one of them Look Good!
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I'm 19 Now!!
So My B-day was May,28th...I went to Hanes Mall! lol mainly b/c well duh I LOVE to shop! I only ended up gettin 1 shirt though & that was in Hollister...I seen tons of things I wanted in Abercrombie as usual but I dunno I can't ever decide on anything! I did get this suuuper cute pink plaid head band! & not alot has been going on really My B-day was actually pretty good! Holly is growing up waaaay fast! she's learning sooo Much new stuff everyday! I actually feel different since my B-day for once & usually it's just like another day but I honestly feel different lol werid huh? oh well! ne ways like 2months ago I put in An Application for the WalGreens their building here thinking I wouldnt hear back consider how long it's been but they called me the other day :D =) yay me! So I go for My Job Interview Monday!!!! So this Means Im gettin A Car!!!! If I get the Job that is......last night these random immature skanks threw this ball & it hit Holly's leg I wanted to knock their teeth out but turns out they were only 14 so yeah I'd have been in jail although I still wished I would have! Im like a Mama Bear you don't mess with My Baby!!!!...so Monday (My B-day) Matt let me try & drive his car *rolls eyes* now in my dads truck im a pro im so great with it considering it's straight gear but Matt's car is soooo sucky! & I pulled out in front of someone which i didnt want to do! b/c I can't focus with someone behind me I PANIC!...but I did decent I suppose! but anyways Im out Im done....Im bored & I think were leaving so TTYL! Muchos Loveos!...The Lovely ♥BrEeStEr♥
current mood: chipper
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Wednesday, April 25th, 2007
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9:39 pm - .....♥♥&hearts......
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So...Holly is doing alot better which I am suuuper thrilled about,I went to the Dr with Martina Tuesday (yesterday) & still she's not ready to have Payton! & I wish he'd hurry up b/c I wanna meet him!...were getting Holly a Kitten..Im pretty happy about that lol....what a Loser i am!...lets see what else?.....me & Matt are doing better he got his hair cut I may have mentioned that last time but it looks waaay better now it's kinda like havin sex with a diff person lol!...anyways our 1year Anniversary is Saturday im kinda happy about that & kinda not b/c well it's not that I want anything & I tell him I don't b/c well I don't but at the same time I do want him to make an effort...I dunno I guess Im just another confusing girl & actually I don't want a gift I want him to act like he loves me for once but anyways I went back to church....& Im still not happy in that Church but oh well....anyways Im done now I'll write again when I have more to say........ ...♥BrEeStEr♥
current mood: crappy
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Saturday, April 21st, 2007
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6:25 pm - ♥Slippin In My Faith Until I Fall♥
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Okay so here is what's up....Holly has been terribly sick :(( & I hate it! She hasnt even been herself here lately..Me & Matt got into a Huuge fight Last Sunday... & he Threw one of those huge water Bottles an Empty one but he threw it with alot of Force b/c I still have a Huge Bruise from it :( but then he was nice afterwards & said we need to talk about our marriage then when I said okay he's like well I don't know what to talk about...weird huh?...anyways...so Tuesday night Holly was sick & threw up in theCar we took her to the ER & was there till 3am they didnt find anything wrong but she had a fever of 103.7...they gave her an anitbiotic but I took her to the Dr the next Morning b/c she was still sick & they said Do NOT give her the Antibiotic b/c where she didn't have an Infection it would make her body fight off things she needs & screw up her immune system!..so that proves Northern Hospital dosent know shit about babies! they also told me not to worry unless her fever ws 105 & yeah that could mess her up! my poor baby! she's still sick & she wouldnt eat all day Thursday :( that is sooo not like Holly she even turned down Chocolate Ice Cream!! something she has NEVER done!....Today she did really good though although she woke up at 6am with a fever of 102.3 :( but she played all day she's still fussy & she still sleeps more than usual im scared there is something wrong with her That they don't know about :(( She is my heart & if anything happend to her I would want to die or probably would!...she's napping right now :( & she already took one nap today...her feelings get hurt alot easier now & she's very clingy to me not that she wasnt already but she's much more now it's just the saddest thing & it kills me to see my baby sick! but im sooo glad she's eating again she actually ate alot today & played alot...were getting her a kitten soon! b/c she's been soo Good through all of this She deserves something she Loves & she Loves Kitties!...Matt cut his hair today which Im really happy about b/c well it was getting kinda sucky! he looks like a different person! kinda hott I guess lol!...Im thinking I need to let out alot of the things I've done..I've stopped going to church b/c I dont agree with the Church it's a Hypocrite Church who will hide anything so they don't destory it! basically like lets let the devil get up & sing & preach as long as they don't know it's him & what he's done it's okay!...well im not down with that & Im sure God isnt either!...but not my problem they will answer for it oneday not me & Im sure not going to be a member of a church like that..Matt's mom dosent seem to mind that im not going & his dad hasnt said anything to me about it but im sure he will *rolls eyes* I need to be in Church just not that one..I feel like im being punished for not going in a way b/c of everything that has been happening but....I just don't know...when I find the right one I will go....I just want my Family there with me!....well im done! Later!!
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Friday, March 23rd, 2007
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10:24 pm - ♥You Are the Best One Of the Best Ones!♥
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Yeah,So Here's What's up!.....Things in the Situation I posted before not really any better,she thinks like Im scared of her or something *rolls eyes* she also thinks Im jealous or that im A Loser...HAH! That's Freaaaaakin Hillarious!.....ne who that's all Im sayin on that bc well Im not wasting my time on her!...So yeah My Life is kinda Drama free for Once me & Bailey & Jessica are all Getting along for once kinda shocking!....but Im Glad we are!...Im super pissed b/c I havent got to tan In a while & well I cannot stand being pale! that's just not my thing! well not lately!....I feel super fat pale!....dunno why either!.....So I cannot wait for Summer =) ......& I want to get Holly a Pool that will be Suuuuper Cuuuute!...My Mom is coming Home April,6th but Im used to her being gone by now.....Im seriously thinking about getting a tattoo or A Piercing!......I wish my Belly Button was pierced again :( so I May do that I mean I'd had it since I was 14!!! I kinda well miss it!....Matt dosent like it though :( but the bad thing with gettin a tattoo I want one on the back of my neck But well I gotta hide it b/c i don't think Matt's parents wont like it but ....oh well....I still wouldnt have any idea on what to get I mean it's gonna be there for the rest of My freaking lifeeeee!...So yeah My 1year Wedding Anniversary Is April,28th! Yay me!!! =) =)....I soooo Never thought we would make it that long! but Im glad we did plus in November we will be together 3 years!....so ne ways I need & well want a Job to support my seriously bad shopping habits like Spending 400 & some bucks at Abercrombie in like Oh I dont know less than 10 mins prolly! & like 200 & some on Holly in Baby Gap & I would have spent more on her if they had more stuff in her size that cuuuuuute! just like I also would have spent more in Abercrombie but yeah they dont have alot of things in 0 they usualy are like out :(...actually Abercrombie would be like my Dream Job! but well I'd rather be A Nurse or A Cosmotologist which I plan on being so Im pretty sure im Goin to Surry in the Fall...But I want a Job first so I can get me A Super cuuuute Car like A BMW!! =) =) but if not a BMW I really want a Black Jetta or A Black VW Bettle b/c they are Freaaaakin Adorable!.....but ne ways Im guessing im like Done for now so yeah.....Ttyl.......Loves The ♥BrEeStEr♥
current mood: chipper
current music: Cute Is What we Aim For-The Curse of Curves
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Thursday, January 25th, 2007
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1:20 pm - ♥A Bullet In My Head....With The Sweetest Kiss....It's In My Head♥
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So Yeah,I've Been Married Almost A year now & Suprisingly were doing Okay I mean I still Have my Days I wanna pack my Shit & Leave but I do Love him My Daughter ♥HOLLY♥ Is 13Months old Now It's like wow where did the time go & Martina My cousin/Bestfriend is Pregnant with A Little Boy she's Due May,7,07 *Payton,Alexander,Peeples* So now Holly has a little Friend!......& yeah I guess that is it!............Muchos Loveos!...........♥Ree*Ree♥
current mood: blah
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Friday, April 21st, 2006
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3:24 am - i TrIp OvEr EvErYtHiNg YoU sAy
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Well Im Getting Married Friday! yeah I didn't say woo hoo Im gettin married Friday either! I dunno it's just something I find incredibly stressful & I dunno why! but yeah & His mom wants more ppl there than I want :( so yeah I was like & what If I get up there & Im Nervous & I back out & she's all I'll be standing at the Door with A Gun! like OMG!!! NOT FREAKIN KOOL! His dad Is Marryin us too which I find kinda weird but um yeah! I guess I'll be A Wife Friday Night & Im still not sure how Im feeling about this which Is Kinda bad but what can ya do?! oh well I guess I will write again sometime before Friday.
current mood: annoyed
current music: Taking Back Sunday-Make Damn Sure
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Saturday, March 11th, 2006
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4:27 pm - I've Said It Before & You Know That I Meant It Your All I want To Know & I won't Let that Go♥
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Well Let's See what's been happening?.......Matt filed for His Divorce & Tasha signed the Papers!!!!!! Im super Happy about that!!! & he's gotta go up there Tuesday & answer some questions and then the judge has to sign something then he Is Divorced!!!! & Then were getting married!!!! SoOoOo Thrilled about that!!! & I guess we have found A Place to Live but They are putting down New Carpet so I don't think that we will get to move in until like the middle or end of May so that sucks but oh well I've waited to Marry him since I was 8 I guess 2 more months wont hurt although it will feel like forever :( & We took Holly to get her 2month Pictures yesterday and every weekend for the past 4 weeks we have went to Hanes Mall & last weekend we took her to Hanes Mall & Toys R Us & got her stuff lol! I think I buy her way too much she's not even 3 months old and soOoOo Spoiled!!! but it's okay! & Me & Matt are doing really good except her works from 7 to 3 everyday and I hate that so much!!! b/c by the time I get to see him his Parents are already there! I get no time with just Matt & Holly like i want I feel like Im datin his parents it totally sucks but oh well! well I guess that's all Im gonna type for now cause Me & My Beautiful Holly are goin beddie bye! nite all!!.............♥Breanna♥ ♥♥♥I L♥VE MATTHEW,RAY,EASTER!♥♥♥
current mood: loved
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Friday, February 3rd, 2006
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10:19 pm - ::*::JESUS IS MY HOMEBOY::*::
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Okay Things Are SoOoOo Much Better Today And I will Start this off with GOD REALLY DOES HEAR AND ANSWER YOUR PRAYERS!!! okay things had started to be Alot better between me and Matt he's gotten to be really good with Holly and pay attention to her and everything and yesterday was good and everything is better between us and that's wonderful because I love him with all my heart! and we went to Church yesterday and then out to eat with his Parents to Libby Hills then he brought me and Holly home then he came back and got me & we went to His house then we went to Wal*Mart but anyways last night when I went to Bed I prayed that I knew God wouldnt give you anything you don't need but If It was his Will for things to work out so Me and Matt and Holly can be together and Live together and Me and him get married and I know he just got a car and thats good b/c now we get to go places with him again and that I know he dosent make much where he is working but if it's God's will just help and if not I will understand and be happy with what I have and today when I went to Matt's me and Holly were laying on the Couch and Matt was going to take A Bath and the phone rung and then a few mins later he came up the hall and was like your NEVER going to believe who that was and I was like who? and he's like Renfro called they asked if i wanted my old job back!! which was the job he had when we fisrt started seein each other but everyone got layed off and then he was makin 7dollars a hour and now when he goes back he will be making 8 dollars a hour and from 4am to 12noon!! Im just so happy for him!!! and God does answer prayers! he said that too today Im just really happy and I have a really good feeling about everything I hope everything stays this good!!!
current mood: happy
current music: Underoath-Some Will Seek Forgiveness
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Monday, January 30th, 2006
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8:50 am - Im Soo Happy Again Thank you Jesus!!!
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Things Are SoOoOo Good Again Finally!!! Thank God!!! Me and Matt are really Great Again!! Im So Glad I was so sure this Was The End After I found out he cheated since he wasnt acting the same around me Since I had Holly but things are normal Again and I couldn't be more In Love with Him!! He and Holly are My Everything and I love them Both with All Of My Heart!! I saw Him yesterday and the day Before that and Both Days Were Really Good We Took Holly to get Her Pictures Made! And were still gonna Spend Valentines Day Together Im just really sooo happy again and plus he told me to delete his yahoo and my myspace so Im getting rid of both I feel like I should get rid of it and be completely commited to him and not worry about the computer so I may update this every once in a while but thats it!!!
current mood: ecstatic
current music: Switchfoot-Stars
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Wednesday, January 25th, 2006
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3:54 am
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okay Im ever more pissed today! only now Im hurt too!!! last night matt came and we were sitting on the couch and I was still mad at him over everything then he goes if you want me to be honest you know the night I left her well the next day I went back and had sex with her and then when we'd be mad i'd go back down there or when a guy would call me even if I wouldnt answer he'd go back and I just started crying and went to get up to go in the other room and he grabbed my pants and goes im sorry i love you and i was like no and went in the living room and cried then went back in and told him to give me holly and hes like no shes fine omg!! i was sooo sick last night i've never felt that way i've never hurt that bad i love him but that kills me how do u move on from something like that especially when she is still his wife i mean he may not live with her anymore and he has a baby with me and his wife is pregnant by another guy but omg i just get these images in my head and I get so sick like here he told me the whole time she did nothing for him i just dont know how i will ever get over this he cant tell me if i went and cheated on him and told him the details it wouldnt make him sick i swear sometimes if it wasnt for holly id just wanna leave this life and die
current mood: hurt&heartbroken
current music: PANIC! at the disco-I write sins not tragedies
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