| 11:42p |
Fuck this.
My "boyfriend" Santi broke up with me by just deleting me over myspace. No explanation. Nothing. He won't talk to me. I've been drinking tonight. Not to solve my problems, I was already drinking before this drama. I hate talking about it to my friends. Its all the same. I hate this feeling. I'm trying so hard not to care. He's not worth my time, but I want a goddamn explanation. I don't know why I feel so down. We weren't together long. I want to blame the alcohol, but I know he got to me. @_@
I feel alone. I have my best friend, but no one is there all the time. I can't help it sometimes. Like now, I just want someone to understand completely. I want someone who is into raving, industrial music, the fetish scene, and stuff. Jamie is my bffl but there are things we don't share. Santi was into those areas. He was everything I wanted. I had to fuck it up.
The worse part is, I don't even know what I did to fuck it up. -.-
47 days since my last cut. -Sigh-
Current Mood: Upset.
Current Music: South Park- Clubhouses |