!5 (SaVe us from the PaIn)'s Blurty

i guess it's been a while since i had to post here. i was feeling great b4. idk just something came over me like u know how sometimes u just feel good about everything regardless of wut someone says for no real reson u just do? well that's basically how i was feeling for a while and i liked it and i tried to hold onto it but nuthing lasts forever and i guess it just went away and things started going down from there. i cut. all over my upper arm. reely deep this time. they were bleeding for quite some time. i feel bad for doing it. miz cut the other day and showed me hers too so i guess im not the only one who's caved this week. a part of me wants to talk about it with a friend or someone. and a part of me wants to keep my mouth shut since it feels like no one listens anyway so why waste my breath right? i had a class meeting at skool yesterday which they always have after the first week of skool ends but they were talking about how they have support groups at the skool for various different subjects. u can go there and tlak about anything. including that. i like that the skool has that now. i didn't know if they had it b4 or not but that caught my attention. it's free that much i know but i don't know if they tell your parents or not. a part of me kind of wants to go. i don't reely like counsiling and it's wayy too expensive anyway. 150 dollars a session i don't think so! but this is free. and i like group. i feel weird about other ppl from my skool that i do or do not know knowing about wuts going on and wut i do. half the skool knows i cut anyway so it's not totally new. but still. i haven't decided on it yet. but i think that maybe i'll try it out or something if they don't tell your parents. i just feel funny if they know. idk. it's just a thought. maybe it could help idk but a part of me wants to talk instead of bottling it all up but i don't know. i'm still thinking about it. i'll let u know on my decision...