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Saturday, November 27th, 2004
| Time | Event |
| 12:00a | things have been really weird 4 me lately. i feel nothing. its like...i have no emotion at all. maybe its the fetinal that i did. i dunno. then i just had the urge 2 cut. i have no idea y. so i did and now my arm is cut up really bad and its really sore. my friend asked me if i did it outof nowhere. i had no idea what 2 say cuz it really caught my off guard. i just said i dont wanna talk right now a he said that he understands. i think he nos tho cuz on wednsday i was comming home form school on my bus. i was talking 2 my friend and i had my arm up so my sleeve kinda slipped down a little. i guess a few were showing so the kid across from me pulled down my sleeve all the way and saw everything. then he fucking started telling the people around me so they were all staring at me. it sucked ass. i hate people that dont mind their own buisness. i hope it doesnt get around the whole school. that would suck even more. now my sis is bugging me so i gotta go. Current Mood:  highCurrent Music: kittie |
| 3:38a | im new hey i'm new to this community. i've been reading it for liek a week now to see if its my kinda place and i think it is cuz yeah sumtimes i just need to vent to people who actually understand. well about myself i'm a girl im 15 and i've been cutting for about a year now. i mean my life is good compared to a lotta people out there but i still cut and idk why exactly it just helps in sum wayz but i kno i should stop i tried a lot of times. I'm hoping joining this community will help. Well thats all i gotta say for now. ~ redd ~ Current Mood:  blankCurrent Music: a place for my head - linkin park |
| 8:52a | Yep... Well... this holiday was like the rest. I remember why I hate holidays. I just wish I wasn't so damn stupid and have faith that everything will be okay. I hate my family... and my mom. I know, I know... you dont hate your mom... you just hate what she does. NO!!! I HATE her. Everything that is and has gone wrong in my life is because of her. Everything that is wrong with me is because of her... its all her fault I am who I am. I hate her for that. She was never there and she wasnt yet again. I have people tell me to forgive her and trust her... but do they have the right to say that? I feel they dont when they havent been through what Ive been through and feel what I feel. How could they know? And I know some people are going to read this and be like... oh yeah, shes really got it bad... but, I always say its not how much more worse the experiance is, but how it effects the person. A cat dieing can be as bad as a parent dieing for someone... its how you handel and deal with it. So yeah... I did cut... and it makes me sad. Alot of my emotions I can't feel anymore. I dont know what they feel like anymore. I only feel anger and depression. I sometimes start to cry and cry and I cant stop but I dont feel sad... just blah... nothing. I hate it. but yeah... I guess Im done. -Aimee Kendra Lynn Current Mood: blankCurrent Music: No warning |
| 5:30p | um hi? *acts like shes standing at a mic* *tap tap* is this thing on?? *retarded she knows but well shes guessing no ones gonna read this so yay! -_-;;* well i thought id introduce myself see if i cant make some enemies *grin* or friends *shrugs* my name is beth but pleaaasseee call me eric (yes i know its a boys name) its been a year since ive last cut (okay i lied about 2 or three nights ago but xacto knives dont work on my arm so it dun count -_-;;) im an all around person *shrugs* most people like me (cept me sis who proly wants to kill me but thats okies! =3)i have social phobia so i cant believe for a second that ill be posting something other people can see *sighs* well im gonna be an artist *shrugs* i cant show you any of my stuff but by this christmas i can if youre interested but i doubt it and i LOVE yaoi X3 thats about it and if you hate me then im sorry tell me and ill never post here again and if its cause im too chippy then uhhh im on meds! and it helped... alot so *shrugs* and if you wanna talk i think you can find my AIM somewhere im a good listener and even if i dont say something... i dunno okies before everyone hates me bai bai!! Current Mood:  nervousCurrent Music: random music |
| 8:07p | i cut 2day.. can you please read and then IM me on AIM.. :( OPPS I CUT 2DAY .. :( .. i was mad and depressed about alot and i took my blades from my moms room when she wasnt home and i took them out and looked at them... and i took one and i cut my self just once so the thought of me cutting could leave my head .. but.. it felt sooo good that i did it again and again and again and now i have 7 cuts and i carved in a "K" and an ''S'' :( ..im soo messed up latly .. i like 4 gurls and im really close friends with 2 of them... and i told all of them i wouldnt cut ... and i promised sum of my other friends ..and i broke my promise .. i feel really really bad !! read this ... "Hey god, why r u doin this to me? am i not livin up to wat im suppose to be? i think you owe me a big apology. i donno wat ya mean. seems like salvation only comes in my dreams.i feel my hatred growin more extreme. can this world be as sad as it seems? dont take it away from me, i need someone to hold on to.there is nothign left for me to hide. i lost my ignorance, security, and pride.im all alone in this world u must despise. i believed the promises and lies. u made me throw it all away. my morals are left to decay.u've taken everything from me! my head is filled with a disease,my mind is beggin u ..please. im on my hands and knees. i want soo much to believe, i really do,i give u every thing i really donno who i am in this horrible world.." is it good??? i wrote it i think its ok but not the best... well i dont know wat to do anymore... :( can some one help me please ?! if you can help me or give me advice then, IM me on AIM ..my screen name is ... Craving4RealLuv PLEASE, yours truly Krista H. :( PS .. sorry its soo long.. Current Mood: lonely / depressed / numb Current Music: nobody's home - avril / The Disappering Boy - Green Day |
| 9:21p | I haven't cut for four days. I haven't really had any urges either, which is good. However, I've been having urges to take all my ambien and ritalin and ibuprofen and my moms thyroid pills at once, smash my car into a wall at ninety miles an hour, and slit my throat from ear to ear. So....improvement, maybe. Probably...not. And I'm scared shitless, because I could so easily do it. Eeergh...okay, shutting up now. Current Mood: anxiousCurrent Music: Mad World |
| 10:21p | ...hi im new... hi im new to the community but i've been reading the comments for a while. i'm 16 and i've been cutting for almost a year. my life seems to be so great to everyone around me but when you actually live my life and feel the things i feel, its not all its cracked up to be. i mean i am losing my best friend, my boyfriend, pretty much everything that i have is slowly drifting away. :( i havent cut in a few weeks because my mom said if i do that i get sent away to a hospital and i'm scared of being sent away but the urge is just too strong that i dont know if i can hold back. i hope that talking to people here will help. -:|:- much love -:|:- *~Nae Nae~* |
| 11:46p | some people eat too much when theyre depressed. some people get mad at other people for their problems. and some of us cut when we feel the need to. cutting is just another way to deal with stress and other shit?? i dunno i was just thinking about it. but really, it doesnt seem so bad when you think of it like that... am i wrong? |
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