Friday, October 29th, 2004

Time	Event
12:51a	omg this is not happening. this is not real. it's a lie. or a dream. or something. but this can't be real. no. tony had a gf that he didn't tell me about. this was about 8 months ago. her name was trish. blonde with green eyes. omg i can't beleive this. the one person i trusted, needed, went to everytime i cut, hated myself for "hurting". he didn't outright lie, but this is just as bad. i don't know how things are now. If they're still together or what. omg, this is just so wrong. my god, please, i just want to die. this is too much, everything's gone now. i kept myself from cutting, for him. fell in love with him. beleived him. trusted him. and for what? to get stabbed in the back. how typical. (Comment on this)
10:33a	all i want is stay all alone. Current Music: Prime STH - I'm Stupid (Comment on this)
2:50p	so confused so the info that i got about tony, saying he had a gf back when that i didn't know about, i'm so mixed up. i got the info from a guy who'd hacked into Tony's pc. but tony says he hasn't had a gf since Jan. 1, 2003. maybe the hacker misinterpreted what he found. I don't know. but i cut, i was just going crazy, so crazy that i just grabbed a dull pocketknife, started slashing on my upper arm. it won't scar, they barely bled(11 lines). Current Mood: confused Current Music: "sober"-tool (Comment on this)

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