I'm not too sure when the last time I updated on here was, but I think it was quite a while ago. In case anyone thinks, what? She hasn't updated on here before, I am/was further_away but my journal was suspended. Why does that happen anyway? It really annoys me. The other day, on saturday I went to a party with hel, my best friend. I don't really like the person who hosted the party too much, well, it's more she doesnt like me but still. Me laura and hel were messing aobut in a lttle room where no one was it was funny there was a huge leather beanbag which I could lie on, it was so big. And we put a shrek cd on, m,ike kept coming in and saying this is shit, and walking out. He is pissing me off, like the other day when we were sitting in the radio room, he kept holding onto my legs it was bad as. I keep mentioning adam around him to put him off or reinforce the fact that I want him to piss off. It doens't work. And he is a good frieed when he's not like that so I don't want to offend him by telling him to piss off. Me laura and hel danced on a coffee table a lot to MJ! It was good. Me and hel were there most of the night on that table lol. Mike kept grabbing hold of me and helen and was being all up against us we kept trying to save each other, it was obvious we weren't happy aobut it, but he didn't stop.
He even did it when I was on the phone to adam. He held onto my legs and tried to hug me :( When he went put the room I told adam and adma spoke to him on the phone, nothing bad jsut general I think, but even that didn't work.
Haha, when laura and me were laughing and she siad that adam was really fit, he was like adam? that guy with the backcombed hair and the emo front bits? He's not that good looking!
Hah, piss off mike, you're just jealous cos you aint. :)
I cut at the party, which was a bad idea, cos it wouldnt stop, and I thought it would be ok, but there was some blood down my arm when I was dancing. I'm sure someone saw, cos it was a bit obvious, but then I was mving a lot, and I had all my bracelets on. I hope they didn't
Does anyone here like Velvet Goldmine? God I love that film, it's soooooooo good.
My mother is being a dick, I want my old mum back. I have felt so shit the last few days. Haven't cut since the saturday at the party. I was about to sunday night cos I felt so shit aobut my mum. I dunno. I told adam I wanted to die, cos at the time, I did. He was scared. But I wouldn't try commint suicide. I just wouldn't. Except if.....
If I found out I was pregnantI would take an overdose I decided. Not to commit suicide buit to land mysefl in hospital, then they will abort it, if the drugs didn't.
Stay well, love you all. I'm here if you wanna talk
Sophie x x x x
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