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Tuesday, October 5th, 2004
| Time | Event |
| 11:28a | New for you You took my heart, One day at a time, and now theres an empty hole I guess love alone just wasnt enough, and you "needed more to grow on" so while your at it, take my hand and lead me off a bridge, because now we're through, I got your clue You just needed a fool to lean on. --Della Current Mood:  sickCurrent Music: School Chatter |
| 12:18p | I'm not too sure when the last time I updated on here was, but I think it was quite a while ago. In case anyone thinks, what? She hasn't updated on here before, I am/was further_away but my journal was suspended. Why does that happen anyway? It really annoys me. The other day, on saturday I went to a party with hel, my best friend. I don't really like the person who hosted the party too much, well, it's more she doesnt like me but still. Me laura and hel were messing aobut in a lttle room where no one was it was funny there was a huge leather beanbag which I could lie on, it was so big. And we put a shrek cd on, m,ike kept coming in and saying this is shit, and walking out. He is pissing me off, like the other day when we were sitting in the radio room, he kept holding onto my legs it was bad as. I keep mentioning adam around him to put him off or reinforce the fact that I want him to piss off. It doens't work. And he is a good frieed when he's not like that so I don't want to offend him by telling him to piss off. Me laura and hel danced on a coffee table a lot to MJ! It was good. Me and hel were there most of the night on that table lol. Mike kept grabbing hold of me and helen and was being all up against us we kept trying to save each other, it was obvious we weren't happy aobut it, but he didn't stop. He even did it when I was on the phone to adam. He held onto my legs and tried to hug me :( When he went put the room I told adam and adma spoke to him on the phone, nothing bad jsut general I think, but even that didn't work. Haha, when laura and me were laughing and she siad that adam was really fit, he was like adam? that guy with the backcombed hair and the emo front bits? He's not that good looking! Hah, piss off mike, you're just jealous cos you aint. :) I cut at the party, which was a bad idea, cos it wouldnt stop, and I thought it would be ok, but there was some blood down my arm when I was dancing. I'm sure someone saw, cos it was a bit obvious, but then I was mving a lot, and I had all my bracelets on. I hope they didn't Does anyone here like Velvet Goldmine? God I love that film, it's soooooooo good. My mother is being a dick, I want my old mum back. I have felt so shit the last few days. Haven't cut since the saturday at the party. I was about to sunday night cos I felt so shit aobut my mum. I dunno. I told adam I wanted to die, cos at the time, I did. He was scared. But I wouldn't try commint suicide. I just wouldn't. Except if..... If I found out I was pregnantI would take an overdose I decided. Not to commit suicide buit to land mysefl in hospital, then they will abort it, if the drugs didn't. Stay well, love you all. I'm here if you wanna talk Sophie x x x x Current Mood:  bored |
| 4:25p | I ♥ The Used oh so much Small, simple, safe price Rise the wake and carry me with all of my regrets This is not a small cut that scabs, and dries, and flakes, and heals And I am not afraid to die I'm not afraid to bleed, and fuck, and fight. I want the pain of payment What's left, but a section of pigmy size cuts Much like a slew of a thousand unwanted fucks Would you be my little cut? Would you be my thousand fucks? And make mark leaving space for the guilt to be liquid To fill, and spill over, and under my thoughts My sad, sorry, selfish cry out to the cutter I'm cutting trying to picture your black broken heart♥ Love is not like anything Especially a fucking knife |
| 5:05p | "its wonderful wonderful here" so yesterdasy was cool. me tyaler may and tawny got our pics. taken for the news paper. [iiiiiiiiif you see a bunch of letter 'I''s iiiiiits cos my keyborad is broken, sry] we got interviwened about the achool food. iiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiii gave my opinon about it. it sucks. alot. so yea. not much goin on here. been runnniig alot lately. its cool.those ten pounds wiiiiiiiiiiill be gone iiiiiiin not time. my goal is 130 ish. but whatever. i hate this keyborad. love ya guys. bye <3 -im only happy when it raiins. Current Mood: thirstyCurrent Music: garbage [x] iiim only happy when iit raiiiiiins |
| 8:02p | I FUCKEN HATE THIS PLACE!!!!!! Today was a pretty good day (key word was). I did a good job on my speech for speech class, and all the rest of my classes went pretty smoothly. James asked me to go to the park and watch him ride. So I ended up going and watching him. I think I like him. Each day I do more and more. He's just a good guy. But then step-fucker ruined it all right now by telling me that if I don't have a job in the next 3 days that he's taking my phone away (that I pay for) and they aren't going to let me online. I hope they do it. They'll see what happens.... I'll show 'em REAL good.... they don't like funerals. "And goodbye to everything, sianara everyone... they are tired... write the euology..." -FIF Current Mood: suicidal Current Music: Dashboard Confessional |
| 8:04p | totally not on the subject of this community..but.... does anyone live in central california that is in band(high school band) who is going to cupertino(sp?) this weekend? |
| 10:46p | I cut my self the other day, 3 lines on my wrist becasue it just feels good. well it deff did becasue i was on E and drunk it was fuckin great, i have been doing alot of coke and its been helping me lose weight. I think i might have found the answer ive been looking for. its gonna be alot of money but its okay becasue if i can get to a point where i dont hate myself and can stop cutting then i will be okay.... or at least i hope soo...... I kno its been long since i have writtin but i also stoped writing in my deadjournal also. But i hope everyone else is welll :0) |
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