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[17 Aug 2003|10:57pm] [ music | Evanescence - My Immortal ] Well.... we're all here at this love hotel... Tatsumi put us all up for a nice relaxing vacation... But I'm worried about Hijiri. He won't talk to me, he goes for walks all by himself. Hell, he won't even look at me. I feel like he's avoiding me... like he's mad at me or something. I wish he would talk to me about it. I want this to be a relaxing vacation for him, but something's really bothering him and he won't talk to me about it at all. I really want to help him. He's out taking a walk... I wanted to go with him... but I don't think he really wanted my company... he doesn't seem to want it at all, lately... post comment

Helpless [12 Aug 2003|05:12pm] [ mood | guilty ] [ music | Siam Shade - Life ] Things have been going down the drain since our last mission in Kyoto. Hijiri and I came home and rested for a few days before going back to work. Hisoka and Tsuzuki got back safely from America. Hijiri started complaining about horrible headaches about a week ago, so he asked for something and I gave him some aspirin. Or, at least what I thought was aspirin. It turned his hair the color of Hisoka's ;;;. They looked like twins. And it didn't clear up his headaches any. He went out into the office and I followed him, and I saw him kiss Hisoka ;;;;;;;. I don't know what happened, but it apparently wasn't serious, except for the fact that Hisoka knocked him out cold. A little while after that, while Hijiri was resting, Tatsumi came to us, and told me that I was needed in Kyoto to inspect one of Muraki's abandoned labs... that's not all we found there. The place Tatsumi had us set up in was an old boys' home. The same one I was placed in after my mother died. But we went to investigate and split up, which I later found, was unwise. I checked Muraki's lab, but found little. I was heading to find Hijiri when I saw Muraki himself and followed him. I hid outside his apartment but apparently, he knew I was there. He invited me in for some tea, or, should I say, demanded that I come in. There, he presented me with a business proposition, which was to work for him. I decline, until he showed me that Hijiri captured and... rather strung up like a puppet... He threatened to hurt Hijiri... so I gave in... He locked me down in this cold room filled with harsh lights without food or water.... there was a body there... he wanted me to bring to life... it was Tsuzuki's.... I could hear Hijiri's screams from upstairs... I can't stop hearing them. They still ring in my ears, tearing at my mind and heart...... I tried to sabotage it... but he found out... and he... he... gutted Hijiri.... right in front of me... I scrambled to give Hijiri a healing potion... I think that it did some good... Later.... I sent a message bird to Tatsumi telling him that we had encountered Muraki, but I didn't get to write much more than that. Muraki found out about that too... he came downstairs.... and shoved a hot poker throught my shoulder.... and told one of his men to keep an eye on me... I finally finished it... and he seemed pleased. He said that I could go... and I went to get Hijiri... to get him away from that horrible place and somewhere safe..... Muraki came back in and pushed me out the window, snatching Hijiri from my grasp.... It still feels like the back of my head is open, the warm matter from inside splattered on the ground around me.... It feels disusting... even now, when it's patched up.... I hated for Tsuzuki, Hisoka, and Tatsumi to see me like that... helpless and bloody on the hot cement. I'm not sure what happened after that... I woke up in the infirmary in the Meifu... Wakaba was healing Hijiri and me... I had to guide Hijiri back... he... he almost died... but he made it back.... just barely...... .............. He and I are on sick leave now.... I couldn't protect him from Muraki.... I couldn't protect him... I'm trying to make it up to him by doing whatever I can.... I still haven't gotten much sleep. I didn't get any until I was in the infirmary.... I don't care though... taking care of Hijiri is much more important. post comment

It's over [27 Jul 2003|12:42am] [ mood | distressed ] [ music | DJ Mystic - Japanese Boy ] Hijiri's mad at me ;_; I did a bad thing, so now I'm 'in the dog house' as some put it. It's a long story. We finally completed the mission. Yay. The chairman opened the portal, but the demon there prefer his niece, so the demon apparently erased his memory and took her on to lead his following. They were going to use Hijiri as a sacrifice, but I went and saved him.... but not until after the chairman harrassed me a bit. I... uh.... offered my body to him.... in order to get to Hijiri in time. *blush* well... I was nervous and wasn't thinking and I forgot I could apparate. I was worried about Hijiri! Well... he didn't get to sleep with me, thank Enma, but... he did other things.... I feel dirty... and Hijiri's mad at me because I did that. I don't really blame him... Gomen, Hijiri! I bought him a flower while I was out getting the stuff for dinner that he sent me to get... I'll leave it on his nightstand. Hopefully, he'll see it in the morning. post comment

help [17 Jul 2003|11:27am] [ mood | distressed ] [ music | Luna Sea - Stay ] Okay, I am very afraid now. Apparently, an anyonomous person commented on my journal ;;;;. I don't need ANOTHER stalker. Please, if you would be so kind as to leave a comment with your name and all, I would very much appreciate it. Believe me. Well... Hijiri and I have been here just over a week I think. *sigh* The Chairman just won't leave me alone. I know that he's our prime suspect, but I don't think I need to be harassed for it! I'm going to contact Tatsumi and ask him want to do ;;. Hijiri's growing restless I think. All the girls in his class like to chase him around. Several even invited him to have lunch with them, but I've packed his lunch everyday, and he's refused and come to sit by me when I decide to go to lunch. Sometimes I just skip lunch in fear of the chairman. Bathroom harassment is not fun. Nor is being nearly forced on date after date. I come home a complete mess from the chairman trying to get in my pants almost every time. I have gotten some information though, which is a good thing I suppose. *sigh* Well... Class is about to start. I better go. Hijiri's in this class to ^_^ <3. Seeing him makes me feel better. post comment

[14 Jul 2003|03:36pm] [ mood | stressed ] [ music | Vast - Touched ] I'm really starting to not like this mission at all. The first day at school was okay... to begin with. That is, until all the female students in the class I teach with Hijiri in it attacked me asking such questions like were we really brothers and if he was single. ;;;;;;. It got worse. The chairman of the school invited me to dinner, and well, since he is out top suspect, I agreed. Well... he tried to get me drunk and in the sack. Not good. I fought and he let me get away. I think he has this fanciful idea that if he keeps trying, he'll get me eventually. ;;;;;; There's been no sign of the portal yet. And we haven't found any clues so far. I'm thinking I'll do some investigation during the late after school hours to see if I can find anything. I wanna snuggle Hijiri! post comment

Return to Kyoto [08 Jul 2003|10:25pm] [ mood | pouty ] [ music | Weiss Kreuz - No Reason ] Well, Hijiri and I are in Kyoto to start our new mission. I'm kinda dissappointed because we have to act like brothers while we're here. Even in the apartment! ;_; *pout* So, I can't huggle or kiss or glomp or nuzzle him or anything! ;_; It shouldn't be too bad though. We'll only be here for a few days. He starts school tomorrow and I enter as a Chemistry teacher. Whee fun. I already promised that I wouldn't blow up anything. Hijiri had to put up a safeguard against that I suppose. After all, I was attacked by pink marshmallow peeps that had come to life the other day. But I stomped them ^_^ V! We just have to go in, close a portal to the spirit world that someone opened, and get back out without anybody knowing about our true identities. Easy enough, right? Lucky for me I invented something that closes just such portals. Finding it is gonna be the hard part. Well... Hijiri's trying on his school uniform. My kawaii Hijiri <3 <3 <3. Oh well. Just put on some coffee. We better go over the mission and get to bed soon. I have to sleep by myself ;_;! I hope Hijiri brought that teddy bear I bought him. post comment

Memories revisted [04 Jul 2003|01:43am] [ mood | happy ] [ music | The Hong Kong Knife - Love Me ] By Enma... it was wonderful.... *_* Hijiri and I made love for the first time that last night in Osaka... and... well it was so dream-like and unreal, but absolutely beautiful. *little hearts everywhere* I'm pretty sure that everyone in the office knows now though. I just couldn't stop thinking about it. Tsuzuki mentioned something about sparkles everywhere around me. I wouldn't be surprised ^_^. I'm happy that I finally got to be with Hijiri. I had dreamed about it for so long and I was finally ready. Concerning our other undertakings in Osaka on the second day, we went and got some lilies for my mother, and went to the cemetary. We passed the apartment building where my mother and I used to live before... I had to move back to Kyoto. I grew up in Osaka. It was my home... even though Kyoto is my home too. I don't want to think too much about Kyoto though. I seem really happy everytime I go there... but there are some things there that I'd rather not remember. But on to other things. We went to the cemetary. Mother was buried in the very back beneath a cherry tree that hangs over the stone wall. I'm back there too... but I prefer not to look at my grave. Hell, I'm not even sure how I died. I don't know if anybody knows. I think that maybe I'm better off not knowing. But Hijiri and I knelt, and I arranged the lilies on Mother's grave, and we talked to her a bit. I introduced Hijiri to her and told her that I loved him and how very special he was to me. I hope she likes him. I know... I talk about Mother as if she's still alive. But, I know she's not. She passed away some 56 years ago. She was the most wonderful mother that someone could ever have, and her love was unconditional... even though... there were certain things about me... and my existance, that were painful for her, I'm sure, but she loved me anyway. I miss her very much. I don't talk about her often, but I think about her a lot, and I carry a picture of her in my pocket. It's a very old and worn photo by now. It was taken almost 60 years ago. But... moving on, Hijiri went over to my grave, the rather neglected thing it was, and put some sunflowers there... they're my favorite flower, because they mean happiness. After we left the cemetary, we went to dinner, and then back to the hotel and into the hotsprings... where... I decided that I was ready to be with Hijiri, and we went up to the room and... well you know the rest of the story ^_^. Oh! Hijiri's talking in his sleep. @@ shit, it's 2:13 in the morning, and I have to be to work at 8 am. Tatsumi mentioned something about a new mission to me, so I'll probably be staying late to research. I hope it's nothing too big ;_; post comment

Osaka Day 1 [02 Jul 2003|01:09am] [ mood | indescribable ] [ music | Hijiri snoring ] Well, Hijiri and I are in Osaka. And yes, I'm quite back to normal. No more lion Watari. But we've had a lot of fun so far. We got to the hotel and settled in before going sight seeing. We went to a temple and both went through a purification and pray ceremony. Hijiri seemed a little nervous, but I told him that I'd protect him no matter what. ^_^. Then, we went back to the hotel and I blindfolded him and took him to a festival with fireworks and all. He turned back to normal though, and his yukata was nearly falling off of him. @@ I carried him back to the hotel and took him to the hotsprings. He wasn't feeling well, so I took him back up to the room and we went to sleep, but I just woke up a bit ago. Still tired though. Tomorrow... we're going to see Mother. We need to stop and get some flowers.... I can't wait for her to meet Hijiri... I hope she likes him. post comment

Interesting evening [11 Jun 2003|05:00pm] [ mood | blushy ] [ music | Iman - The Neverending Story ] Last night... was... um.... interesting. I got to go home finally, and Hijiri made dinner and we ate together. All that was normal. And then, he went to take a shower... and aparrently... he grabbed the wrong clothes, because he came back out in the towel... I couldn't help but stare at him! He's gorgeous! And well... we started talking and... he asked me if I wanted him to drop the towel.... I got up from the couch and embraced him... and he did. Hijiri is very beautiful. I held him close, then asked him... if I could do to him, what he wanted to do to me the other night... and I did. I saw a side of Hijiri I had never seen. He... oh, how do I explain... he seemed to be afraid. He was shaking. I asked him if he was alright. He said that he was, and just nuzzled closer to me. He looks smaller without his clothing on. Almost frail. I love him <3 This morning... there were pictures circulating around the office of what I did last night. I can't believe it! Takara's up to it again! Or maybe the apartment's bugged. I probably should have put some thought into it before I did that in the living room. ;;; *blush* I've been snatching them up left and right and Tsuzuki really scared a couple of office girls over the pictures. I've burnt them with some of that special acid in the trashcan. post comment

Eyes and things [10 Jun 2003|06:51pm] [ mood | working ] [ music | Petshop of Horrors - Jikuu Ryokou ] Well, I spent all last night in the infirmary and in the lab because Tsuzuki seriously injured Takara. Takara is still in the infirmary right now with his injuries mostly healed thanks to Hijiri, but I found a problem with his eyes. They seem to have been replaced by mechnical eyes. I removed them today after I finally got some sleep in the lab. Hijiri brought me breakfast. It seems that he didn't get any sleep either. He said that he was lonely. I feel bad for not being able to go home with him. But I got to come home tonight. I'm still running tests on those mechnical eyes to see how they work. It seems as though Muraki was purchasing Takara's services and obtaining the pictures. That bastard even went as far as to send Hijiri and threatening email. I had hoped that he was dead... but it seems as though he's quite alive. And if he does come back, I won't let him lay a hand on Hijiri. Only a few more days until Hijiri and I go to Osaka. He needs the rest. Right now, I'm taking a break from my testing, and planning things for us to do and see. I hope he likes the arrangement. If not, we can always change it. Currently, I'm looking at taking him to an fair that they have running. I wonder how he'll enjoy that. I think I'll keep that a secret too. Oh well. Off to dinner. Hijiri says it's ready. He needs a hug. post comment

[08 Jun 2003|12:17am] [ mood | loved ] [ music | Utada Hikaru - First Love ] Wai! <3 <3 <3 Hijiri and I had so much fun on our first date! I took him to this classy restaurant in the classier part of town and we ate there and I was sou glad that I was able to reserve a window table for us. Then, as a surprise, I took him to the park where the local symphony was having a concert and we sat on a bench away from the people but near the stage. I think he really liked it. We went home after that and it was kinda late. When we got home, we went to bed and apparently, Hijiri wanted to... um... do... uhh... things... to me to repay me. But I told him he didn't have to, and I that I wasn't quite ready to go that far. He said that he understood. That wasn't just our first date. It was my first date. I've never been on a date before, and I tried to make that one as special for Hijiri has possible. *yawn* bed time post comment

Pictures [05 Jun 2003|10:46pm] [ mood | annoyed ] [ music | Hijiri taking a shower ^_^ ] Well, Hijiri and I have... well... been getting a bit more intimate lately. No, we didn't go all the way... not yet. We were making out and... wel... I gave him a hicky. A love bite. Whatever you want to call it. I've never even had one. Only a bruise from getting beaten up that everyone thought was a hicky... but that's a different story entirely. I'm taking him on a date tomorrow. Probably just a dinner and a movie type thing. I need to ask where he wants to go ;-; cause I don't know. I want him to choose what we'll do, but I'm going to pay for everything. Maybe I could surprise him. There is a really nice resturaunt in the classier part of town. Maybe we could go there. And then a movie... or the theater... I think there is a symphony going on in the park tomorrow night. Maybe he would like that. I know how much he likes music. Hijiri keeps getting harrassed at work. Tsuzuki too. Stupid picture thing. Stupid Takara. He's selling pictures of Hijiri to some nasty leecher and he won't tell us who. Grr. I don't like him harrassing Hijiri. It makes me mad. *sigh* I think I should probably go to bed soon. Hijiri is about to get out of the shower, so I'll wait for him. All this makes me angry. But soon Hijiri and I get to go to Osaka. So happy. post comment

[03 Jun 2003|07:24pm] [ mood | contemplative ] [ music | Evanescence - My Immortal ] Oh my gods... I can't believe I did that. I had a really hentai dream last night... and when Hijiri woke up this morning... he found my hand where it does NOT belong. *blush* He said that he didn't mind... and even liked it... well... anyways, we were late for work today. Not that we did anything! I swear! We cuddled and kissed and a little bit more, but we didn't even get clothes off. I'm glad too. I'm waiting until we're ready... I want him to be my first. <3 <3 <3 <3 <3 I'm going to ask Tatsumi for a few days off, just like I have every year at the same time, so I can go down to Osaka. I do this every year but I've only told Hijiri so far why. It's so I can go and see my mother. It'll be the anniversy of her death. I asked Hijiri to come with me. Everytime I've gone before, even when I was living, I went alone. I think it might do some good to take someone along this time. Hijiri reminds me so much of my mother. He's soft and beautiful and hardworking... and NO!! I do not have a Odepius Complex. I loved my mother very much, but I love Hijiri in a VERY different way. *sigh* oh! He's making dinner! ^_^ <3 yay. I'm hungry. Then maybe we watch a movie and snuggle more. <3 <3 post comment

[01 Jun 2003|10:39pm] [ music | Ayatsuri Sakon - Hikari naka Yoru no Yuke ] By Enma.... Hijiri is tall! He's my height! Holy shit! He's absolutely gorgeous though... and just wow... I'm not sure what happened, but it happened to Hisoka too. Wow... he's still Hijiri, but taller and his hair is a bit longer. I had to give him my labcoat to where because his clothes got too small very rapidly... and I had a nosebleed. I've been sick these past few days. Cold and a stomach virus, but Hijiri took care of me and I'm feeling much better now. Thanks, Hijiri ^_^ I need sleep. I've been snuggling a lot with Hijiri... We're officially a couple now! yay! post comment

Nuzzles [28 May 2003|09:09pm] [ mood | happy ] [ music | Luna Sea - Stay ] Well, 003 is back to being a bird. It seems that he went rouge and was harrassing Hijiri ;; and that's why he was sou upset and avoiding me. He raped Hijiri and threatened him with all sorts of nasty things. I wish he told me. It's better that he's an owl though. He's so much nicer. Hijiri sprained his ankle coming to save me from 003... and I don't want him walking on it, so I gave him a piggy-back ride to work, much to his embarrassment. He's so cute when he blushes. I think he's a little angry though. I got him lunch today and we ate together. I nuzzled him the whole time. I couldn't help it. Konoe walked in as I was nuzzling him and saw... and so did Terazuma. Now there will be rumors about he and I rather than Tsuzuki and Hisoka. They need a break from the rumors and bets though. I made dinner for Hijiri and I tonight. He's taking a shower right now. I just finished making desert too ^_^ he should be out to enjoy it soon though. Maybe we'll watch a movie after that. You have a surprise kiss! Your partner is always pleasantly pleased to have you jump outta no where to dote them with a fun peck on the cheek or more passionate embrace. super markets and work places are your favorite places to attack your loved one with all your love =p What kind of kiss are you? brought to you by Quizilla I think that fits ^_^ post comment

Nuzzles [28 May 2003|08:34pm] [ mood | happy ] [ music | Luna Sea - Stay ] Well, 003 is back to being a bird. It seems that he went rouge and was harrassing Hijiri ;; and that's why he was sou upset and avoiding me. He raped Hijiri and threatened him with all sorts of nasty things. I wish he told me. It's better that he's an owl though. He's so much nicer. Hijiri sprained his ankle coming to save me from 003... and I don't want him walking on it, so I gave him a piggy-back ride to work, much to his embarrassment. He's so cute when he blushes. I think he's a little angry though. I got him lunch today and we ate together. I nuzzled him the whole time. I couldn't help it. Konoe walked in as I was nuzzling him and saw... and so did Terazuma. Now there will be rumors about he and I rather than Tsuzuki and Hisoka. They need a break from the rumors and bets though. I made dinner for Hijiri and I tonight. He's taking a shower right now. I just finished making desert too ^_^ he should be out to enjoy it soon though. Maybe we'll watch a movie after that. You have a surprise kiss! Your partner is always pleasantly pleased to have you jump outta no where to dote them with a fun peck on the cheek or more passionate embrace. super markets and work places are your favorite places to attack your loved one with all your love =p What kind of kiss are you? brought to you by Quizilla I think that fits ^_^ post comment

Rain [26 May 2003|02:54pm] [ mood | worried ] [ music | Weiss Kreuz - Beautiful Alone ] I'm really worried about Hijiri... He won't talk to me about anything... he won't cuddle with me... he doesn't sleep with me anymore... 003 has taken that place... he shys away from my kisses and my touches. Did I do something to hurt him? ;; why won't he tell me? Speaking of that, 003 is back to normal! Which is a good happy thing! I'm glad he's back. I missed him. But he's back to being human. I finally found that potion. I've been trying to change him back for years! And finally, I have succeeded. But, Hijiri... whatever I did to hurt you... I'm sorry.... I'm going to confront him about it tonight if he still won't talk to me.... I wonder if maybe he's told Tsuzuki anything... Oh... it's raining outside... it's so pretty... the blue-silver rain droplets clattering gently on the window panes, falling from the deep, swirling, purple-gray storm clouds above... If only Hijiri were here in the lab with me to enjoy it... post comment

Long week [18 May 2003|02:24am] [ mood | tired ] [ music | Hijiri snoring ] Sorry I haven't posted in a while. I've been sleeping, working, or spending time with Hijiri. That's all. We ate dinner tonight... and shared dessert. <3 we fed it to each other. it was great. I love his cooking... but I love him most of all. <3 <3 <3 We went a little overboard this evening... but we didn't get very far... we both got tired and laid down to sleep. I just woke up a bit ago.... I'm going to return to him in a few minutes... He's sou cute when he sleep! -^_^- <3 I wish I had some money... I want to buy him something... or take him somewhere... just the two of us. He found out about my sex-change potion... and my reason for trying to make it... but he told me that he loved me no matter what... no matter what I was. We talked after dinner... mainly about being together forver and how much we enjoy each other's company. He found out the other night that I'm still a virgin. Yes. I AM STILL A VIRGIN! We almost went REALLY overboard that night... well... back to bed... I'm so tired... and we go back to work on Monday... goodnight post comment

Suspension [11 May 2003|10:34pm] [ mood | gloomy ] [ music | Koyasu Takehito - Blue Mask ] My after life is miserable... Something good did happen... Hijiri summoned a Shikigami, named Yuki, so he gets to stay... Bad News: I am on one week suspension without pay... and so is Hijiri. All because of me. It's my fault. The accidents in the office always are. I was working on a potion, and I was testing the acidity, so I used a pink marshmellow peep. because everyone knows how utterly indestructible those things are. Well... it mutated... there was an explosion and Hijiri and Tsuzuki came to see what happened. It tried to eat me. Tsuzuki hit it and it tried to eat him. He ate it first. And then he turned into a puppy. *sigh* His mindset seemed to change to that of a dog... I tried to tranquilize him, so I could find the antidote... but I hit Hijiri with the dart... and it wasn't the antidote. It turned Hijiri into a rabbit. And then Hisoka came in... Tsuzuki went with him... and I took Hijiri home and worked all night on an antidote. It was another sleepness night. Four nights without sleep and counting... well... Hijiri got back to normal the next morning. I came up with the antidote and asked him to take it to Tsuzuki... but Hisoka found us out. And told Konoe. I tried to take all the blame. It was my fault anyway... but neither Tatsumi or Konoe would let me... I tried to take all the punishment. Hijiri made me sleep last night... I slept in his bed with him... he's probably the only thing that kept me from breaking down completely... shit... I'm not going to have enough to pay the rent this month.... post comment

More than the Earth loves the Moon... [07 May 2003|09:34pm] [ mood | distressed ] [ music | David Bowie - As the World Falls Down ] Hijiri... is being transferred.... to fucking Italy! I can't believe it... I just can't... I refuse to... He'll be with other music-powered shinigami... but I won't get to see him anymore... God knows that he'll never have the time or money to come visit... and neither will I. I told him that I would starve in order to raise the money to go and see him... I suppose I'm that desparate. He told me not to do that though... because he didn't want to worry even more about me... I held him... it was the only thing I could do... I couldn't find words when they were needed the most... he eventually calmed down... and asked me if I still loved him... 'more than the earth loves the moon'... that was the only way I could describe it... We kissed... he told me that he loved me too... that he had finally realized it... and I held him some more... He fell asleep in my arms. I took him to his bed and laid down with him... I couldn't bear to leave him like that... after a while, I fell asleep, staring at him without my glasses on... And he's asleep now... poor thing... post comment

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