man. i went to a baseball game yesterday with dan, katie roach and bonnie, because my neighbor gave me some tickets for free. it was so unbelievably boring. sigh. and typical. redsox won. black people lost. you know how it is, being oppressed by the man.
dan came over yesterday for a little while, and then at the game, i guess it was made official that we're going out. we hung out at the park after dropping everyone off afterwards. it's just...i don't know. nevermind.
bonnie and i got to talking about some guys at school. like kris, who is supposed to be getting me a job at brookstone. i seriously don't see how she can like him. i hope he goes away for college so i don't have to work with him or see him ever again. i used to think he was pretty okay, but now...he's the most obnoxious guy ever. it's sickening. i still remember the way he acted so stuck up at prom.
then we talked about phillip and the black tim. like, out of nowhere, black tim started poking me in the stomach whenever he went by. and phillip was acting like he wanted to talk to me the last week of school. so i asked bonnie if she had told him that i missed talking to him, but she said she hadn't. so, i don't know. maybe he just...i seriously don't even know. i just wish we had at least spoken. i really just want to be friends. he's so awesome. even dan said that he's nice. i really miss him. i don't want to cheapen it, and it's not the same, but it feels sorta the same way as when stephen didn't talk to me for a while after him and jessica got back together. except, i didn't know they had gotten back together until we started talking again. but, i don't know, i wish i could just call him and talk to him and tell him that i want to be friends and he not freak out or think i'm madly in love with him. i know he has a gf. i'm not retarded. god. this is so useless.
hmm...i think the only problem is that i feel like a substitute for something he can't get.