| watching the hypocrites..and laughing at them |
[27 Nov 2007|12:15pm] |
hypocrite A: trish, you know, ever since she's got her boyfriend, she never even bother to go out with us liao.
trish: honeymoon period girl...it'll get over soon.
hypocrite A: but fuck la...she only come to me when she has problems.
{trish: u also ma, got no one to talk to, then come to me}
hypocrite B: trish, you know my boyfriend, aiya, i feel like breaking up with him, but i'm in love.
trish: if u don't like him...just leave la. what's the problem? why must think so much?
hypocrite B: aiya..i don't know.
hypocrite A & B keep secrets from one another, and then bitch about one another to me. and in the end, they happily go out together, never ever asking me. cos i'm there just to fill in whatever empty spaces they have.
and then after their outing....
hypocrite A: trish..u know she came over to my place and we had a long chat, and we found out a lot of things about what other people have been saying behind us. then we cried together.
cool...now i know what they are soo busy with. talking behind their "besties" back and then spreading rumours all over..and then having it all come back like a slap on their own face.
....that's what best friends are for eh.
and then trish silently watches all these dramas...about who likes who and what she/he did.
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| i'm so fickle |
[27 Nov 2007|01:01pm] |
just a few months ago, i had the money to splurge.
and then, i bought the guitar, not knowing what i'd do with it. haha.
and then, i got a ds lite, as a gift, and then i couldn't get past stage 3 of super mario...and it has since been collecting dust.
and now, i feel like selling the ds lite. but then again, it doesn't feel right to. the guitar too. i feel so guilty. i've not touched it for weeks. thank god, i'm getting lessons tonight. hopefully, i'll start to feel reconnected to everything around me again.
i've been swaying between the extremes of emotions...even considered killing myself after watching a movie. am even more convinced that the world is too harsh on sensitive people like me..and then waking up one day justifying my suicidal thoughts as me being egoistic.
i've got to start learning how to stay true to what i have. it's really true when they say..u become what u abhorr. i'm starting to behave like a blardy butterfly, flitting from place to place.
mum said to me last night: why do u keep thinking people are ill-treating you all the time?
i put on a smile...cos even if i cried, she'll just think i'm mad. i may be. and i have trouble expressing my pain. at the very least...i still know right from wrong.
well, i should go to hell for writing rubbish like this. totally unrelated to the blog title. hahaha.
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