Below are the 3 most recent journal entries recorded in tanya's Blurty:

Saturday, January 22nd, 2005
3:20 am	fuck-IN- hell well thats a great steat isn,t it im so fed up and bored i feel so angry and mad i dont fucking know, hers the deal im a size twelve 32e and curvery, to most men that is great wow but i feel mega shit about myself and i go to the gym four times a week but i seem to be getting fatter then rather then trimming, im working nights still fucking hell that cant be good can it cos in such a massive eater i just love my food, anh way i am so down but dont know why there is loads of reasons but when it comes to typing them up i cant think of one, plaese some one give me slimmin tips i'll try anything once. lol typical blonde me. (Comment on this)
Tuesday, December 21st, 2004
1:51 am	working again i'm still on night its so doing my head in. wellim feeling so fucking down its driving me more mad i just can't get past this down stage. i went out last night on the piss up and felt really down i saw a few male friends i knew and my boyfriend got all jealous saying i was a tart and wanted to know who there was and where i knew them from, if i wasn't feeling shit enough i didn't need that. i have been with him3yrs but now i'm looking aroung for new talent but feel so guilty when i spot some one but i always feel sexy when i notice them looking back, i never approach no-one and when there often approach me i just say sorry i have a boyfriend so it's pointless anyway and i go home feeling worse. i just want to hide away some where were no-one will bother me and i can just think about what i want and where i want to be in life because at the minute im still working, sleeping or eating. i'm not a big eater although i love my food when i do eat. i just dont know what to type because i don't know where to start there is so much going on in my life that the mo but its all shit or hassle!!!!!!!!!!!! if ang one reads this your proberley thinking get it sorted give your head a bang! but where do i start???????? hey if angone has ang advise please give im open to suggestions Current Mood: blah (1 Comment |Comment on this)
Wednesday, December 15th, 2004
3:43 am	what a mess im workin nights, really doing my head in. i really dont knoe where to begin really and how in depth i should go? i hope who ever reads this will able to give me advise a little, well here i go latley i have been throu a really bad time i found that i was druged and possibly worse i don't know yet? my head feels like its exploding every mintue every second of the day i never knoe how im really feeling or why i feel like i do. i have a boyfriend and been with him for some time now he has stood by me when most people coundn't be bothered with my emotions, but latley i feel i hate him when i'm around him i feel shitty and un-confident i take my moods out on him because he is there maybe i love him alot thats why i feel i can treat him the way i do cause boy he must love me to but up with what he does but what im feeling and what im going through has nothing much to do with him yet i blame him for every thing, he gets under my skin and pushes all my wrong buttons i feel he does this to winde me up maybe because i treat him poorly lately im stuck in a rutt dont know which road to turn to? (2 Comments |Comment on this)