Alex's Blurty Entries [entries|friends|calendar] Alex [ website | stop animal tests! ] [ userinfo | blurty userinfo ] [ calendar | blurty calendar ]

moving [09 Mar 2004|08:05pm] i got an lj. everyone make one and add me. my user name is: radio_ga_ga. talk to you there. QUEEN!!

danse macabre! [02 Mar 2004|03:36pm] [ mood | sick ] [ music | switchblade symphony - wicked ] long time, no update. not too much has happened. well, yes it has. i lied. as of right now, everything really kind of sucks. i'm still deciding whether or not i should get my tattoo. i mean, it is permenant, however i do want it, and you only live once right? wow that's a shitty reason to get a tat. i'm going to have to seriously contemplate it, although it's really really small. BLAH. i saw the passion of christ. we left in the middle, because lei almost threw up.. literally. it was really sad. it might make you cry. um what else? oh, i'm bandless. alex might want me to do something with hers but i don't know. i don't know any of the people and shit. happy birthday yesterday to lixie! that is all i'd like to say. FTW KiLLER QUEEN!!

boredom. [20 Feb 2004|09:53pm] [ music | dream theater - under a glass moon ] LAYER 1 -- Name: alex -- Birth date: january 7th -- Birthplace: new york -- Current Location: bayonne, nj -- Eye: brown green -- Hair: black -- Height: 5'5 -- Righty or Lefty: righty -- Zodiac Sign: capricorn LAYER TWO -- Your heritage: american. other than that: irish, polish, austrian, italian, french, german, + russian. -- Your weakness: certain boys make me cave. -- Your shoes you wore today: red lowtop converses. -- Your fears: losing loved ones, getting rejected.. well, being rejected isn't really a fear, it's just like a "wow that would fucking suck and i hope it doesn't happen" -- Your perfect pizza: cheese. -- Goal you'd like to achieve: get through band practice alive, quit smoking, pull my grades yup, convince my mom i'm "mature" so i have more freedom. LAYER THREE -- Your thoughts first waking up: sleeeeeeeeeeep. -- Your best physical feature: eyes? i like my hair a lot. -- Your bedtime: when i get tired. -- Your most missed memory: being happy and worry free, having my biggest stress be which hoodie to buy. LAYER FOUR -- Pepsi or Coke: coke. -- McDonald's or Burger King: bk. -- Single or group dates: whichever. --Adidas or Nike: adidas. -- Lipton Ice Tea or Nestea: lipton. -- Chocolate or vanilla: chocolate. -- Cappuccino or coffee: coffee. LAYER FIVE -- Smoke: i'm trying to quit. -- Cuss: yes. -- Sing: word! :) -- Take a shower everyday: yes. -- Have a crush: yes. -- Do you think you've been in love: yes. -- Want to go to college: yeah. -- Want to get married: if i meet the right person. -- Believe in yourself: yes. -- Get motion sickness: no. -- Think you're attractive: depends. -- Think you're a health freak: no. -- Get along with your parents: sometimes. -- Like thunderstorms: they're alright i guess. -- Play an instrument: i sing. LAYER 6: -- Gone to the mall?: in my lifetime? yeah. -- Eaten an entire box of Oreos: no. -- Eaten sushi: yes. -- Been on stage: yes. -- Gone skating: yes. -- Made homemade cookies: yes. they sucked, but i DiD make them. -- Gone skinny dipping: no. -- Dyed your hair: yes. -- Stolen anything: yes. LAYER SEVEN: -- Been trashed or extremely intoxicated: once. -- Been called a tease: yes. -- Gotten beaten up: no. LAYER EIGHT -- Age you hope to be married: i don't know. -- Numbers and Names of Children: boy: jack -- Describe your dream wedding: happy. -- How do you want to die: peacefully would be nice. -- Where you want to go to college: no clue. -- What do you want to be when you grow up: i have no idea. -- What country would you most like to visit: i don't know. LAYER NINE: -- Best eye color: green is pretty. -- Best hair color: black. -- Short or long hair: long on boys. -- Height: taller than me. -- Best weight: ..? -- Best articles of clothing: i dunno. -- Best first date location: anywhere with him. -- Best first kiss location: doesn't matter. LAYER TEN -- Number of drugs taken illegally: none. -- Number of CDs that I own: a bunch. -- Number of piercings: 2. -- Number of tattoos: 0 unfortunately. -- Number of times my name has appeared in the newspaper: a few for softball. -- Number of scars on my body: some. -- Number of things in my past that I regret: quite a few. QUEEN!!

stolen from alison. [20 Feb 2004|09:38pm] [ mood | bored ] [ music | dimmu borgir - fear and wonder ] Instructions: 1. Copy this whole list into your journal. 2. Bold the things that you have in common with me. 3. Whatever you don't bold, replace with things about you. 01. i'm half italian. 02. i'm 100% white! 03. i really like industrial. 04. i go to an all-girls catholic high school. 05. i am unemployed. 06. i hate people pretending to be someone they're not!! 07. i love the song I Touch Myself 08. i really dislike humanity in general. 09. i really enjoy sleeping. 10. i have a nose. 11. i hate cellphones, yet am forced to have one. 12. lipgloss is cool. 13. southpark rocks hard 14. i've had to give up my ticket to atleast 6 or 7 shows. 15. i used to have braces. 16. i wonder sometimes if my life would be different if i tried a bit harder. 17. i always wanted glasses, but i always had really good vision and couldn't have them. 18. i play softball. 19. i love afi. 20. one of my absolute favorite songs is "killer queen". 21. i love a&p. 22. i don't know how to respond to compliments. 23. my favorite animals are cats. 24. my mom calls my cell a lot 25. i love movies. 26. i'm a skirt fiend. 27. i think i'm funny. 28. i hate my science teacher. 29. i've seen a ghost. 30. i heart my friends <3 32. i need to see it to believe it...but not always 33. my family makes me mad most of the time. 34. bagel bites are great. 35. i hate to be copied. 36. i hate rap. 37. i wouldn't be here if it wasn't for my friends. 38. i get along better with guys than girls. 39. band guys<3 40. i'm very sarcastic!!!!! 41. i really enjoy thoughtful gifts! 42. i like my hair straight! 43. i love chocolate. 44. i want my lip pierced more than life itself. 45. i love clothes! 46. i haven't written a poem in a long time. =( 47. i hate school in general. 48. i have two younger brothers that are under the age of one year old. 49. i feel naked without my eyeliner. 50. i love to lay and listen to music. 51. i heart sweatshirts. 52. i hate asking my parents for money. 53. i love to find money in my coat pockets. 54. i need to finish this now. 55. i love art. 56. i hate people who talk REALLY ghetto. 57. i don't like self centered people. 58. i like winter; i hate summer. 59. i'm a three time failed vegitarian. 60. you don't always have to be in love with someone to love them. 61. you can't change me. 62. i think i'm a good friend! 63. i've got my own style, and i love it. 64. i want to have a good life. 65. i like my personality. 66. my hair is black. 67. i love to argue. 68. i like being open minded. 69. i'm completely against animal testing. 70. i am religionless. 71. i detest most small children; there are exceptions. 72. i like to put glue on my hands, let it get dry, then peal it off. 73. pretty boys make me hott. 74. i like being with people i love!! 75. it makes me mad when things i like become trendy. 76. i love boys with dark hair and pale skin. 77. contrary to popular belief, i don't hate everyone. 78. my parents are split. 79. i absolutely fucking can't stand it when people chew while you're on the phone with them. i hang up. 80. i love to smile. 81. i've never done cocaine. 82. i hate having the feeling that I'm not going to go anywhere in life. 83. when i DO allow myself to get close to people, i get very attatched. 84. i use a lot of AA batteries. 85. i like Halloween. 86. i'm an extremist. 87. i always speak my mind. 88. i know it's important, but politics really bore me. 89. i like reading. 90. i don't like crowds. 91. i use smileys a lot in my iMs. 92. i had a fish that was 8 years old and died. it sucked. 93. i hate when people look over my shoulder. 94. i love to laugh. 95. i don't like reality shows. 96. i love to shop. 97. i still sleep with stuffed animals. 98. i live for killer guitar riffs and a hardcore scream. 99. seeing an elderly couple makes me smile. 100. i need a certain amount of attention. 101. i hate people who judge other people based on their appearance. KiLLER QUEEN!!

[16 Feb 2004|11:31pm] [ mood | awake ] [ music | offspring - smash ] went to the mall and saw donnie darko shirts in hot topic. yeah, that really sucked. i bought black lacey shoelaces. they're cooliez. i bought jeans too + lei's mom is going to get the flare out of them for me and resew them straightleg and i have to put patches and shit on them. i bought makeup too + all this ony & tina + MAC sparkly eye shadow shit. they're cool as hell. then went to john doris' + hung out with him and lei. we had a fucking good time. i don't have school tomorrow so i'm picking up lei. next weekend, me and her are most likely going into the city with john + dying his hair blue. it should be fun. that's all i did i think. i am: alive. i think: too much sometimes. i know: lyrics to afi songs. i want: someone who shall not be named. i hate: my mom. i have: BALLS. i miss: not caring. i fear: not too many things. i feel: my boobies i hear: the misfits - last caress i smell: nothing; air. i crave: sitting in elisse's basement watching disney movies. i search: for happiness. i like: singing. i long: to "get the hang" of st. dominic acdemy. i believe: i will be in love and loved back one day. i always: get cold. i lost: my orange chapstick. i never: liked pink. i confuse: the people around me. i listen: to music. i usually can be found: by calling my cellular device. *Favorites* color: red. food: baked ziti. number: 13. animal: cat. car: one that gets me from point a to point b. all-time song: i don't even know. current song: vice squad - princess paranoia + queen - good old fashioned lover boy actress: angelina jolie + christina ricci movie: underworld School Life Who is your favorite teacher?: ms. gilbert What do they teach?: english Is this your favorite class?: no Do you enjoy school?: not at all. Internet Do you use any instant messengers?: yes If so, which ones?: AiM About how many hours a day do you spend online?: depends. Do you have a digital camera?: yes Music Do you play any instruments?: i sing. If so, what one(s)?: i rock the mic. 3 Favorite Bands: afi, queen, the cure Do you listen to any bands that you'd be ashamed to admit to listening to?: i don't think so. Did you notice the grammatical error in question 29?: they're not numbered. Labels: Do you think labels are dumb?: yes Why or why not?: catagorizing people gets you nowhere. What do people label you as?: skankoid, hoebag, prostitue, yanno. How/Why did you get this label?: because i work the corners. Which Is Worse? Physical Pain/Emotional Pain?: depends. probably physical. Blink-182/Good Charlotte?: good charlotte. Being Deaf/Being Blind?: blind. Being Bored/Rushing around because you have too much to do?: bored. Love Do you believe theres a difference between "love" and "in love"?: yes. Is it better to have loved and lossed than to have never loved at all?: no. Are you romantic?: not really. Are you in a relationship now?: no. If so, for how long?: ... If not, how long have you been single?: *shrugs* months. Are you a virgin?: yes. What song describes your love right now?: afi - the lost souls. Randomosity War: Good or Bad?: horrible. What do you think of designer labels?: too much $. Who's skankier: Britney Spears or Paris Hilton?: paris. What is it with guys and cars?: um i don't know. i don't really know any guys that like cars a lot, except lixie who LOVES minivans. Do you sing?: yes. If so, what part (Soprano 1,Alto 2, et cetera)?: ...i sing. that's all that matters. i'm in a band. Kiss or hug?: kiss or hug who exactly? What color is your room?: purple :) How old is your mom?: 35. Black and white or color photos?: color. Who cuts your hair?: heather at the cutting cafe + vicky at clipp one. What color is your toothbrush?: green and white. What color is your hair brush?: black. What kind of hair products do you use?: straightening balm + a blowdryer for when i wear it straight + lasting curls, texturizer, gel, scrunching spray, and a curling iron for when i wear it curly. Is K-Mart just the poor man's Wal-Mart?: i don't know. Are you sexy?: dead sexy. What color do people tell you looks nice on you?: red. What color do you think looks nice on you?: black. red looks okay. i don't mind jeans. Clothes shopping or grocery shopping?: well i don't want to fucking starve. Who do you sit with at lunch? cara, alex, susan, lauren heagen, nicole villarosa, + kelli lewis. Do you like the sound of your own voice when you hear it played back?: i don't really care. Who has the nicest speaking voice that you know?: i like lixie's voice a lot and john doris' voice is really soothing. What is the website for one of your favorite bands?: afireinside.net Do you prefer to date people younger, older, or the same age as you?: older. Do you listen to songs on repeat often?: yes. Who was the last person you hung out with?: elisse + john. What did you and that person do? watch cky videos, listen to music, and hang out. Do you use internet shorthand (i.e. "lol", "brb", "jk", et cetera)?: yes. How often do you bathe?: everyday. Are you a people-pleaser? people seem to like me. i don't try to please people though. i mean, i'm nice. i'm not like mondo bitch if that's what you're asking. Do you dye your hair regularly?: yes. What about your eyebrows?: no. Do you wear makeup?: yes. If you answered "yes", to #96, are you female?: which was 96? yes, i'm a female. Do you buy CDs edited or unedited?: unedited. Do u like the song "Hey Ya" by OutKast?: no. *for/against* abortion: for. my problem, my cunt, my choice. premarital sex: go for it. smoking: against. drugs: against. drinking: against. suicide: against. it's the easy way out. religion: dangerous. *last time you* argued with someone: today. hated something/someone: today. loved someone: today. took a shower: this morning. were singing outloud: today. screamed: today. cried: two days ago. lied: today. wanted to die: i don't know. *relationships* first love: same one that i love now. how many times you have been in love: twice. bf/gf: now? no. KiLLER QUEEN!!

stolen from alison [16 Feb 2004|12:07pm] [ mood | hungry ] [ music | afi - this time imperfect ] If I were a stone, I would be: onyx If I were a tree, I would be: apple If I were a bird, I would be: crow If I were a machine, I would be: a washing machine :D If I were a tool, I would be: huge fork that elisse gives me to eat with If I were a flower/plant, I would be: a rose If I were a kind of weather, I would be: cold and dark out If I were a mythical creature, I would be: vampire If I were a musical instrument, I would be: does a microphone count? If I were an animal, I would be: cat If I were a colour, I would be: red If I were an emotion, I would be: a good mood If I were a sound, I would be: music :) If I were an Element, I would be: fire If I were a car, I would be: a MiNiVAN! If I were a song, I would be: afi "at a glance" If I were to trade places with another person, it would be: davey havok; just to see what everything's really like, yanno? If I were a movie, I would be: underworld!!! If I were a food, I would be: baked ziti If I were a place, I would be: manhattan If I were a material, I would be: vinyl If I were a taste, I would be: wonderful If I were a religion, I would be: atheist If I were a word, I would be: teehee If I were an object, I would be: camera If I were a body part I would be: the heart If I were a facial expression I would be: smirk If I were a subject in school I would be: english If I were a cartoon character I would be: daria If I were a shape I would be: circle If I were a number I would be: 13 If I were a month I would be: january If I were a day of the week I would be: friday If I were a time of day I would be: 3 am If I were a direction I would be: north If I were a piece of furniture I would be: the leg lamp from a christmas story If I were a sin I would be: either pride or lust If I were a historical figure I would be: If I were a liquid I would be: ginger ale If I were a method of death I would be: burned at the stake QUEEN!!

[15 Feb 2004|11:24pm] [ mood | gloomy ] [ music | thursday - war all the time ] happy friday the 13th + valentines day. i have off until wednesday. today i went to elisse's, out to dinner with my dad, + back to elisse's. flash came over. ;) that was fun. i didn't really do anything all that exciting. as far as love goes, i'm back to square one. i believe that is all. QUEEN!!

survey [15 Feb 2004|03:59pm] [ mood | bitchy ] [ music | blondie - dreaming ] Name: alex Age: 15 Boyfriend: i don't have one. Girlfriend: i don't have one of those either. Parents: kathleen and brian. Sexual Preferance: males. Pets: peggy the cat, giovanni the dog, bailey the dog. Major Likes: friends, music, hanging out, having fun, boys in tight pants, boys with long hair, boys that wear make up, angelina jolie, johnny depp, tim burton movies, horror movies, having fun, blazers, skirts, cool band shirts, hoodies with scarves, cats, mac make up, urban decay, look at my userinfo or something. Describe yourself in three words: extremist, sarcastic, honest Worst place to be: school Best place to be: anywhere having a good time Least favorite nickname: "lex the t-rex" Ever have a song written about you? no What are you saving up for? a studio + a cure sweatshirt + cds i want + a depeche mode shirt Favorite fruit? apples What day did you get your period this month? i didn't yet or i got it like the second (carried over from january). shit, i don't remember. Favorite chapstick: whole foods orange flavored + cherry chapstick Are you done with this quiz? i don't think so. Name: alex Sex: female Age: 15 Screen Name: daysofthealex Meaning: days of the phoenix is a song. i replaced "phoenix" with "alex". Siblings: ben & tom Status: single. Height: 5'5 and a half Hair Color: black with red chunks. Eye Color: brown green Writing Hand: right BODY ILLS AND SKILLS Nervous Habits: bite my fingertips + nails, bite my lip Do you bite your nails? when i'm nervous Can you raise one eyebrow at a time? yeah but i can only do it with one of them Can you blow smoke rings? no Can you blow spit bubbles? yes Can you flare your nostrils? yes Can you cross your eyes? no Tattoos? soon Piercing? just ears; used to have my bellybutton - took it out (infected). i want the middle of my lip + a few more holes in the bottom of my ears though. Do you make your bed daily? no. CLOTHES What goes on first, bra or underwear? underwear Which shoe goes on first? which ever i locate first What jewelry do you wear 24/7? 14g black arrow curved earings, 3 black rubber bracelets on my left hand, + 2 pink rubber rings [from fLash ;)] What's sexiest on a guy? long hair, tight pants, makeup, piercings, tattoos, smiling, funny, eyes, taller than me What's sexiest on a girl?: angelina jolie? Favorite Piece of Clothing: my black grave digger skirt, afi hoodie, charcoal sweatpants, + alien sex fiend shirt (the cool one with the picture) Pajamas: black ones with the eyes FOOD Have you ever eaten Spam? no Favorite Ice Cream? mint chocolate chip. How many cereals in your cabinet? 2 i think, none of which are mine. What's your favorite beverage? ginger ale What's your favorite restaurant? i dunno What utensils do you use to eat pizza? hands. GROOMING How often do you brush your teeth? every morning + night How often do you shower/bathe? everyday How long does your shower last? like 45 minutes Hair drying method? blowdryer Have you ever colored/highlighted your hair? yes If that fountain of youth existed, would you drink it? maybe. depends who's drinkin` with me + who i'm gonna be stuck with forever. Would you rather have genital herpes or be 50 lbs. overweight? 50 lbs overweight MANNERS Do you swear? yes Do you ever spit? yes <- my manners suck. WHAT'S YOUR FAVORITE... Animal: cat Food: baked ziti Month: december Day: friday + saturday Cartoon: daria Flower: roses Subject in school: lunch? Color: red Body part on the opposite sex: face, jaw. Body part on the same sex:  angelina jolie? TV show: ER, daria Holiday: halloween Book: the lovely bones was super. Vacationing Spot: anywhere but here. Perfume or Cologne: whatever smells nice :) TV Station: cartoon network, lifetime, vh1, e!, disney channel, hbo + other movie channels IN AND AROUND Person you talk most on the phone with: elisse Ever taken a cab? yes Do you regularly check yourself out in store windows and mirrors? not really What color is your bedroom? purple Do you use an alarm clock? yes Name one thing you are obsessed with: afi? Have you ever skinny-dipped with the opposite sex? no Ever sunbathed nude? no Window seat or aisle? window LA LA LAND What's your sleeping position? side What kind of bed do you like? comfortable Even in hot weather do you use a blanket? yes Do you snore? no Do you sleepwalk? no Do you talk in your sleep? no Do you sleep with a stuffed animals? sometimes How about with the light on? no WHICH IS BETTER... Coke or Pepsi? coke Oranges or apples? apples One pillow or two? two Deaf or blind? they both suck. Pools or hot tubs? hot tubs Blondes or brunettes? blondes Tall or short? depends TV or radio? radio ga ga. Tic-Tacs or Certs? tic tacs Snooze button or jump out of bed? snooze button Sunrise or Sunset? sunset Hamburger or Cheeseburger? cheeseburger Morning or night? night Bikini or one-piece? bikini Indoors or outdoors? out Christmas Eve or Christmas Day? eve Bert or Ernie? ernie Spicy or Mild? mild Spearmint or Peppermint? spearmint Call or Write? call Peanut Butter or Jelly? peanut butter Hamburger or Hot Dog? burger Dog or Cat? cat Bath or shower? shower Book or Movie? i'd rather watch a movie, than read a book, but if it's a book that was made into a movie, i'd rather read the book. Green or Red apples? green. Rain or Snow? snow 5 MOST PRiZED POSSESSiONS 1. cds / cd player 2. computer 3. clothes 4. my phone 5. my hair [ x ] Spell your first name backwards - axela [ x ] The story behind your lj user name - totalimmortal is a song. i added an "ex" to make "alex" at the end. [ x ] Are you a lesbian - no. [ x ] Where do you live - bayonne, nj. [ x ] 4 words that sum you up - she's a killer queen. DESCRIBE YOUR [ x ] Wallet - like 5$ in it, along with my id, despair faction card, + gift certificates. [ x ] Hairbrush - black + bristles are like melted from the blowdryer so they go in odd directions + pull my hair out. [ x ] Toothbrush - green with white bristles. [ x ] Pillow cover - black. [ x ] Blanket - purple. [ x ] Sunglasses - black. [ x ] Underwear - now? light blue + satin. [ x ] Favorite top - band shirts. [ x ] Cologne/Perfume - whatever smells nice. [ x ] CD in stereo right now - bleeding through. [ x ] Tattoos - :( [ x ] Piercings - just ears. [ x ] What you are wearing now -  black pajam pants that have eyes on them, black v-neck shirt, + dickies hoodie. [ x ] Hair Now- down and blowdried [ x ] Makeup Now - concealer, eyeliner, + chapstick. WHO or WHAT (was/is/are) [ x ] In my mouth - my tongue [ x ] In my head: alice cooper - welcome to my nightmare [ x ] Wishing - something really good to happen. [ x ] After this - goto eat with my dad + then go hang out with friends and stuff i guess. [ x ] Talking to - elisse [phone] [ x ] Eating - nothing. [ x ] Fetishes - music. [ x ] If you could get away with it and murder anyone, and for what reason - i don't know. [ x ] Person you wish you could see right now - ;x [ x ] Is next to you - cds that i have to burn for saby + AP. [ x ] Some of your favorite movies - way too many to even begin to list. [ x ] Something you're looking forward to in the upcoming month - the sounds show [ x ] The last thing you ate - a brownie [ x ] Something that you are deathly afraid of - not really anything [ x ] Do you like candles - yes [ x ] Do you like hot wax - um not especially. [ x ] Do you like incense - no it's smells gross. [ x ] Do you like the taste of blood - yes [ x ] Do you believe in love - yes [ x ] Do you believe in soul mates - yes [ x ] Do you believe in love at first sight - i believe in infatuation. [ x ] Do you believe in Heaven - no. [ x ] Do you believe in forgiveness - depends. [ x ] Do you believe in God - not the traditional "jesus is our savior" god, so, no. [ x ] What do you want done with your body when you die - i'm not sure yet. i don't really want to burn, but then again i don't really want to be eaten by bugs. [ x ] Who is your worst enemy - worst? jeez, i don't know. probably myself. [ x ] If you could have any animal for a pet, what would it be - cats. [ x ] What is the latest you've ever stayed up - a full day [ x ] Ever been to Belgium - no [ x ] Can you eat with chopsticks - i can stab my food with chopsticks. [ x ] What's your favorite coin - quarters. [ x ] What are some of your favorite candy - skittles, starbursts, twix, reeses, etc. [ x ] What's something that you wish people would understand - gay marriages, lying = not fucking cool, why some people are such dicks, i don't even know what else; there's more though. [ x ] What's something you wish you could understand better - myself, what i want with the rest of my life, boys, why people do what they do [ x ] Anyone you miss that you haven't seen in a long time - yes [ x ] What's one thing you want to make happen for tomorrow - QUEEN!!

[14 Feb 2004|12:24pm] [ mood | content ] [ music | queen - love kills ] my hair is dyed black with red chunks. i freaked when i got home and my mom was a total bitch and commented on the red so i tried to get rid of them. i had temporary dye a home so used that over the red but it didn't work. i guess cause the red dye was stronger so now they're just kinda faded. you can still definitely see them. i've grown more attached to them though. yep. it looks cooliez when it's curly. alex came home with me yesterday from school. we hung out and stuff + then went to barnes and noble. i bought alice in wonderland on dvd, some magazines, + dracula on dvd. we then went to elisse's and watched aiw. when i got home, i totally crashed. i was so tired. later on today i'm going to get dinner with my cioci liz. i don't know what i'm doing for the rest of the day though. i'll be back later. KiLLER QUEEN!!

she's gettin` old. [11 Feb 2004|09:31pm] [ mood | :) ] [ music | blink 182 - i miss you (yes, i fucking like this song) ] HAPPY BiRTHDAY, ELiSSE!! KiLLER QUEEN!!

[10 Feb 2004|12:23pm] [ mood | tired ] [ music | new order - vanishing point ] where did we leave off? well, friday friday was the show at the networking cafe. i went with elisse, cara, alex, + missy. we met up with saby, michael, green, curtis, ryan, brandon, etc. no say played and um, notify simon? yes, i think that was it. a few others too. i SAW JUAN! for like the first time in a billion years!!! we chatted for a while and i got an update on his life. i chit chatted with flash + lixie. i saw joe and we talked for a while. who else? i made sean-o hug me in front of all his |-|@|2|)|<0|23 friends. justin and i started talking again also. ashley showed up at the show later on and we bombarded her. i saw alexis [cara's sister] and lindsay [cara's sister's friend / senior at my school] (correct spelling?). they were cool. i met alexis' boyfriend. he was nice. i saw ryan cherchio! hah that was cool. francis was there too. we all left before the headlining band, on three? jeez, i don't remember. we went to elisse's and just hung out and stuff. it was a good night. saturday so i get called in the morning and told we're going to have band practice and to go to curtis' pronto, so i did. i get to curtis' and it's me, elisse, cara, curtis, and saby. turns out, we can't find ashley, whom we needed to find. well, cara and elisse left because they were going to cheryl's birthday thing. i didn't go because of our supposed practice. so me, curtis, and saby decide to walk uptown and go to ashley's + see if she's home. we walk from 6th to 24th and she's not there so we're all like "wtf?!" so we went to her friend's house. she's not there either. by now, it's like 6. we went to saby's and his mom fed us and stuff. she's super nice. well we called ashley for like the BiLLiONTH time and she said she was coming to saby's. we waited for like a half hour and finally were like "fuck this" and left. on our journey away from saby's, we found ashley. we went to her house and had a completely unproductive, half-assed practice. then we walked to elisse's. it was me, curtis, cara, saby, elisse, cheryl, and ashley at elisse's. we got really smashed. cara got sick. the boys talked us into watching girls gone wild, which totally sucked, might i add, and then they all sobered up. me and ashley, however drank atleast an hour or two after them so we were still totally out of it. anyway, we went to the diner and they all told me that i told curtis i wanted to kick his ass and was singing songs and idk what else. i know i made everyone dance and sing to queen though. curtis threw a fry at my head in the diner so i threw a wallet at him, and i meant to hit him on top of his head or something, yanno? but no, it hit him in his eye. i felt bad. he got SUPER pissed. i appologized and he said we were cool and shit, but knowing curtis, he has a secret hatred built up even more for me now. haha. i slept over cara's and so did elisse, cheryl, and ashley. we took some pill thing and got pretty fucked up. i basically did two of the things that i never wanted to do EVER in the same night: drunk and high, and i'll tell you, there wasn't anything all that special about it at all. i must say, it's highly overrated, especially from drinking like a glass of soda, i can get a natural high that's more fun than that because i actually remember shit. idk. sunday massive hang over. that night, i got food and stuff with flash and then we went back to her house and hung out. :) we had a good time. yesterday school, got sent home sick for throwing up. not fun at all. today concluded that i never want to get drunk or high again because it wasn't fun, is totally self-destructive, and i felt comlpetely out of control. i hate feeling like that. it's like.. idk how to explain it but i didn't like it. i'm not reclaiming the edge at all, i'm just not getting severely fucked up for a very very very long time, if ever again. now i must go get changed out of my uniform so i can proceed to bhs and pick up elisse. :) if anyone thinks less of me due to my weekend, that's unfortunate. this is a journal, and i'm telling the truth. mmhmm. i believe that is all. <3 alex KiLLER QUEEN!!

[08 Feb 2004|02:50am] i'm so totalliezerz fucked up right now. KiLLER QUEEN!!

[04 Feb 2004|08:55pm] [ mood | loved ] [ music | B52's - Love Shack ] agnostic alex (8:50:43 PM): ;-) you're lovey i love alex. and elisse. and cara. and lixie. and someone else. KiLLER QUEEN!!

a mess of thoughts [03 Feb 2004|10:38pm] [ music | tv ] ok so, i'm a fucking extremist. like.. what the hell is wrong with me? i like someone, right, but like, not only do i like them, but i obsess. it's ridiculous. like, i obsess over such stupid shit. like something someone said or a song or a movie. i can watch a certain movie like 6 times straight because i'm in the mood for it. like it's so fucked. maybe there's nothing wrong with me, and it's just the way that i am. maybe i latch on to people too fast. i don't even know. alex and pollicino broke up. it's so scary to think that two people that seemed to perfect for each other and really were perfect for each other, even people who have dated for years and years, can just.. break up. they didn't even break up because of a fight or anything. it was because they lived too far away from each other, and it sucks. i feel bad for them because i'm friends with them both. they were so happy, but they like barely ever saw each other. like, if it can't work for them, then how the hell can it work for the rest of us? and all this band shit has me stressed out. i need to talk to saby really badly. i want friday to come. omg and my grades. like, my mom thinks i don't try. i do. it's just so hard to get really good grades and to try at something, when you really just don't care. like, yeah, i got a 3.0 in chemistry, but not for personal reasons, because my mom was flipping out at me for getting lower than that the marking period before. also, i'm no longer edge. weird, right? i don't do drugs and i don't drink at all. i hate labels. i'm not going to be tied down to something that like binds me to abide by certain rules, you know? that's the basic reason. another thing, does "god" exist? i've been listening to all this hocus pocus bullshit that they're teaching us in bible studies, and humans invented/came up with the idea for "god". there has to be something bigger than that. i hate religion. it's such a corrupt and dangerous thing. personally, i'm not athiest - agnostic more i guess. i don't follow a specific religion. i do take ideas from some though. reincarnation, for example and karma. i definitely believe in those. they just make sense, well to me atleast. ok well i'm tired, and i was supposed to read a tale of two cities and i didn't. eh. elisse gave me a reality check before, hence this entry, and my feeling the need to say this. it was weird. i guess i realized most of the shit she said before she said it, but it always sounds different coming from someone else, especially your best friend. if it offends anyone or pisses anyone off, get the fuck over it. it's my journal. no one told you to read it, so fuck you and deal with it. that is all. word. KiLLER QUEEN!!

[02 Feb 2004|08:25pm] [ mood | lovey dovey ] [ music | jack off jill :) ] i will make you mine. KiLLER QUEEN!!

fucking fill it out. [28 Jan 2004|03:37pm] [ music | queen - bicycle race ] - Where did we meet?: - Take a stab at my middle name: - How long have you known me?: - How well do you know me (1O being the best)?: - Do I smoke?: - When you first saw me what was your first impression? - My birthday?: - Have you ever had a crush on me? - Have you ever been jealous of me? - Do you remember the first things I said to you when we first met? - Whats my fav type of music?: - Am I shy or outgoing? - Would you say Im funny HAHA or funny (sarcastic)?: - Am I a rebel or do I follow the rules?: - Would you consider me a friend?: - Would you call me preppy, slutty, average, sporty, punk, hippie, glam, snobby, or something else?: - Have you ever seen me cry?: - If there were one good nickname for me, what would it be?: - Do you love me? - Am I quiet or loud?: - Weird or original?: - Smart or stupid? - Boring or Fun? - Attractive or Unattractive? DO YOU THINK I'M... - A psycho? - Athlethic? - A nerd? - A slut? - Ghetto? . - A *itch? - Two-faced? - Obnoxious? - Immature? - Mature? - What do you think Ill be when I grow up? - Do you think Ill get married + who? - If you could rename me, what would my name be? - Have you ever had a dream about me? - A feature that you like about me: - If you could give me anything, what would it be? - Am I physically ugly, average, decent, good-looking, beautiful, hot? - Would you ever kiss me? - Would you ever consider being my boyfriend? - Do you ever think about me off-line? - If you could describe me in one word, what would it be? - Do you or have you ever had a crush on me? - What word do I say all the time? - Is there anything youd like to say to me? KiLLER QUEEN!!

snow day. [28 Jan 2004|03:10pm] [ mood | nervous ] [ music | the faint - violent ] at elisse's. i finally bought beetlejuice + white oleander on dvd. cara was supposed to come over, but now she's not. i'm somewhat pissed off. tom is the cutest thing ever. he hates my grandma though. he cries like whenever she touches him. it's funny. he likes me a lot though. i guess he thinks me and my mom are the same person because he's used to my voice. (talked to my mom throughout pregnancy so it's something familiar to him). i need to talk to ashley about what's going on with her band + if she wants me in it or not. i'm definitely in with alex, biggy, + pollicino though, so that should be fun. :) 2 saturdays from now joe's going to biggy's so me and alex are probably going. we'll take it from there. i was talking to saby last night and he said ashley has all the people set up and everything for hers and that i'm in. i really need to talk to her though. yep. 2 bands. i'll be busy, but it's most definitely worth it. umMm. i have to let my mom see my report card later. hopefully she'll be okay with it because she knows i tried. it's not horrible, but it's not great. i was really disappointed when i got it though because i thought my grades were higher than what they actally were. i hope i'm not grounded. please don't let me get grounded. please don't let me get grounded. please don't let me get grounded. please don't let me get grounded. please don't let me get grounded. please don't let me get grounded. please don't let me get grounded. please don't let me get grounded. please don't let me get grounded. please don't let me get grounded. please don't let me get grounded. please don't let me get grounded. please don't let me get grounded. please don't let me get grounded. please don't let me get grounded. please don't let me get grounded. please don't let me get grounded. please don't let me get grounded. please don't let me get grounded. please don't let me get grounded. please don't let me get grounded. please don't let me get grounded. please don't let me get grounded. please don't let me get grounded. please don't let me get grounded. please don't let me get grounded. please don't let me get grounded. please don't let me get grounded. please don't let me get grounded. please don't let me get grounded. please don't let me get grounded. please don't let me get grounded. please don't let me get grounded. please don't let me get grounded. please don't let me get grounded. please don't let me get grounded. please don't let me get grounded. ;/ this sucks. please don't let me get grounded. please. i seriously don't feel like dealing with it cause like, i'm working on it and my grades went up, they're just not all 4.0s. yanno? eh. everyone's grades went down though (susan, alex, cara, nicole, lauren, etc.). :/ QUEEN!!

babies [26 Jan 2004|12:36pm] [ mood | happy ] [ music | afi - days of the phoenix ] i didn't go to school today. my mom had the baby! :D Thomas Quinn Carty January 26, 2004 7 lbs 9 oz 5:49 AM KiLLER QUEEN!!

[25 Jan 2004|07:41pm] [ mood | nauseated ] I've seen the light that emanates from you, and it makes me feel proud, a voice of reason above the muffling crowds. Such will to live and you've got so much to give, long lost sincerity. Lost in a world that's been scorched to black. Lost in myself until I finally find. A guide in you, and gratitude is mine, I admire the way you shine. Stare down the day from which others shield their eyes, with complete clarity, and no trace of apathy. So positive, and your heart you freely give, long lost vivacity. Lost in a world that's been scorched to black. Lost in myself until I finally find. A guide in you, and gratitude is mine, I admire the way you shine oh, and my mom's water broke. KiLLER QUEEN!!

it's so quiet i can hear my thoughts touching every second that i spent waiting for you. [25 Jan 2004|12:08am] [ mood | contemplative ] [ music | vnv nation - beloved ] i went out to lunch with my mom + then went to some place on broadway with her and we looked at baby announcements to mail to people. elisse called me while i was in the card place and told me cara's grandma died this morning. i feel really bad. i went to elisse's and cara, cheryl, + cara's friend frank came over. he was really cool. ramos, hubert, some kid danny, + ross came over later. me, elisse, & frank ordered chinese food. the three of us were like completely secluded from the group. it was funny. we joined the group like an hour later + frank's friend george came. everyone except cara left around nine. i left at 10; cara stayed later though. nick called and he's definitely coming to bayonne tomorrow. i have to meet him at 10.. yes, AM, which fucking blows, but i haven't seen him in a WHiLE so it's cool. i watched white oleander with my mom. it was really good. sad, but good. i have nothing else to say. QUEEN!!

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