"I smoked crack last night.   
12:03pm 23/10/2003
  I look So Emo today. It's interesting. I missed class. But I'm still going to my 12:30 one. I gotta go pick up my meds in Clemmons today. I'm in for an interesting ride, I've been out of ANTIPSYCHOTICS for a while. My dreams sure have been interesting though.

Yesterday was a good day. Biology Lab was interesting, if somewhat elementary. We played with poppit beads and string. But we got to look at Mitosis in a microscope. Then I went to Phillip's house and slept til 2, then we walked Soup. He's a house nazi. It was great.

Soooo. Class in 22 minutes. It's gonna be lame, y'all.

But yeah! I've had great dreams lately!

Ok, in one of 'em, I traveled to the future. By flying through the sky with huge puffy numbers flying past me. And the first person I saw in the future was really really hairy. Somewhat apelike honestly. I don't remember much else about that dream.

Soup and Samson were in one of em. They were just running around being dogs in this cool camping place but they turned into deer and started mating and a bunch of moms were telling their kids weird stuff about what the deer were doing. And in that dream we went to some store.

I'll write more about them later, I'ma go hook up the Telly.		  
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DMB   
06:27pm 06/10/2003
  He wakes up in the morning
Does his teeth, bite to eat and he's rolling
He never changes a thing
The week ends, the week begins

She thinks, we look at each other
Wondering what the other is thinking
But we never say a thing
And these crimes between us grow deeper

Goes to visit his mommy
She feeds him well, his concerns
He forgets them
And remembers being small
Playing under the table and dreaming...

Take these chances
Place them in a box until a quieter time
Lights down, you up and die		  
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Boiled bacon, sounds good huh   
12:34am 05/10/2003
 
mood: nervous
music: Toys-R-Us
Bah, stupid meds. Stupid me honestly. I missed em last night and this morning and I can already feel it. But it'll be okay. Tonight I saw School of Rock, it was good. last night I saw Secondhand Lions and it was good too. I was on time to Biology on Friday, I was proud. Prepositions, harghh.

I try to not bitch in this thing because then all I do is bitch. So then I don't have much left to say bahahaha.

"You can be happy where you are, or as lonely as a star."

Socks: Popcorn, Christmas		  
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Somebody better put you back in your place   
06:51pm 29/09/2003
 
mood: indifferent
music: Queen - We will Rock You
Sooooooo I got up and went to school today, came home to take a shower and then go to Phillip's house, and instead of taking a shower, I passed out for four and a half hours. Then I did a whole lot of nothing for a while, then I went to Phillip's, now I'm waiting at home for Chris to come over. I have to watch an infomercial for Fit and Well for Life and I'm not so sure that I'm going to, uh, complete the assignment. Considering it's due tomorrow and I haven't started. I have to call them and interrogate them or something.

I wanna make music. Guess I better learn how then.

Socks : clouds, and Christmas Snoopy

On the freeway in the county, the sun don't shine
I feel, I feel, I feel, I feel a bati man
Outside my cell, deputies creep
and in this cell, all I do is sleep
and I dream that I'm free
and I'm back on the reef where I throw my net out into the sea
all the fine heinas come swimmin' to me
they hold me and they promise me things
and when the tides high I cry like a little baby
don't give me no right kinda love
no Sunday mornin'
don't want no puppy lovin'
hungry babe, the new stylee
hungry babe, the new stylee
and a ...
a angry dog is a hungry dog
and a...
a hungry dog is angry dog
I feel like rockin', I wanna rock with you
I gotta contact on, gotta contact my... baby girl
But I would, never could get up
Why does it hafta be so damn tough?
With my Yetis and the Sa's
yes they're steady on the floor
I'll be damned if the man with the shake in his hand
will make me feel, I feel a bati man
And I know, that I'm there
Some-day, I...
back on the reef where I throw my net out into the sea
all the fine heinas come swimmin' to me
hold me baby, promise me
with no protection of my erection I won't get no VD
don't give me no right kinda love
no Sunday mornin'
I don't want no puppy lovin'
hungry babe are the new stylee
and angry dogs are hungry doggies
a naked man is a naked man
and a..
a wicked dog is a hungry dog
I feel like rockin', I wanna rock with you		  
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Raise your voice   
03:24am 27/09/2003
 
mood: content
music: Some weird music on the TV
Soooo my last entry was a bit Lifetime movie of the week. I'm not feeling quite as dramatic now. I'm tired as hell though, I just wanted to do this for some unknown reason. I had a decent night. I went to Phillip's house and that was really nice. I just watched him play on the computer pretty much, looked at stuff, and sometimes he'd talk for a while and that was neat. It was good and chill. Sometimes I just get amazed.

Friday's word was navel-gazing. It means senseless/pointless self-contemplation.

Socks: Red fishnets

Anyone have a livejournal code? And what's anybody know about biotechnology? Any cool links?

((v^v//||oOo||\\v^v))		  
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Domo Arigato (Mr. Roboto)   
02:03am 25/09/2003
 
mood: sad
music: TV in the other room
Yeah. Stuff is weird right now. I was really getting happy with my situation and nothing has really fallen apart, but a couple little wrenches have been thrown in. People are getting mad at people over silly things or because they don't learn the truth first. People have broken confidentiality. My friend is dying. My life is going very well, I'm happy, but complications get me down sometimes when I'm idle.

Mrs. Vaughn doesn't have much longer. She's my angel. I guess she'll still be my angel after... I don't really want to write it. She was sent to me at a very bad part of my life, and she was a guiding hand. She is the most pure, beautiful person I have ever met. She stayed hopeful and kind through all the hard times in her life. A big part of my philosophy on life is positivity/equality/negativity. Mrs. Vaughn gives off pure goodness. She spent her life helping others. She was a teacher for kids who had a hard time, and for kids who got in trouble. Mrs. Vaughn has had breast cancer for the past four years at least and she hasn't let it get her down. She kept teaching up until very recently. I know I'm not the only one she has permanently touched. She is an example to be followed. She is the reason that I absolutely have to succeed in this world. If I ever lose motivation or forget why I'm trying to accomplish things, I just have to think about Mrs. Vaughn.

I had a lot more to say, but stuff just got to me for a second and I'm feeling a bit broken and maybe people really won't learn and they really want to hate. But I hope not.		  
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Right Thurr   
03:47pm 20/09/2003
  Sooo last night we(Lauren Chris and I with Heather Clint and that other guy... John?)went to see the Larry Keel Experience in Green Acres. It was sooo fun. There were some fucked up people there though, I'll tell you that. We went in the bus. Slept in it too. It was great, I felt like such a goddamn hippy. The music was pretty cool, not really my style though. I want to go out to the paddle boats but so far I haven't found anyone to go with me. Uhhh school is going pretty well. I missed a little bit too much lately but it'll be okay. I'm liking my courses I think. I might just be manic but I hope this time it's for real.

Being outside is good for people. Moving is good for people. We don't do a lot of that around here. We should.

Wheeeeeeeeeerrreee is Phillip, I've been trying to call since we got home. Mothafucka.

If my grandparents ever found this thing they'd dissown me. I think next weekend we might go to my grandparents' house in the mountains and take the teloscope. Waaaay cool.

Todays socks: Space Tights (dundundun)		  
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We're not gonna take it   
05:12pm 11/09/2003
 
mood: happy
music: Big Dumb Face - Kali is the Sweethog
Soooo we're getting the net and TV tomorrow. FREE! For a month! We get digital cable, a free HBO or whatever, and Roadrunner free for the first month, and it doens't cost anything to downgrade at the end of the month. Good deal, I'd say. So school's going well. I have a cool lab group for Biology. They're a little weird. They're all guys, but they talk about their horoscopes and the show Sister Sister and stuff like that. Psychology is probably my least favorite, but I still like it. My teacher's funny, but he's repetitive. So far the subject matter's not that interesting but it will be, I'm sure. Art Appreciation is awesome. Lauren, Chris, Phillip and I are going to Reynolda House on Saturday to look at shit for that class. And Fit and Well for Life is kind of stupid but I like it. I hope it'll get me in shape. Because I am in bad, bad, bad shape. This guy I knew when I was at West is in my class. I used to be the biggest dick to me, but now he seems cool. Hmmmm. On Sunday after we took Lauren to meet her dad, Phillip at I stopped at Kerr Lake State Park. It was so much fun. I want a freakin' livejournal.

Today's socks: Drunk Frog and Goldfish		  
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Back that ass up   
05:09am 23/08/2003
 
mood: awake
music: Bif Naked
Ok. It's five in the morning. Maybe I'll go to bed in a couple minutes. I had an epiphany and a lot of interesting things to write about, but I forgot 'em all. It's time for me to clean up my act some. I'm startin' to get kinda like a zombie, I forget everything. But I'm gonna straighen up. I wish I could remember that epiphany. It was the one that was gonna fuel this campaign. Damn, haha. Hopefully these things'll start coming back to me soon. *ahem*.

I've decided the format of my entries thus far are entirely too plain.

Today's socks: popcorn and dragon

Today has been a very. very. very. long. day.		  
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Try cross-dressing   
03:12pm 22/08/2003
 
mood: content
music: Two Skinnee Js - Stockholm love
Today was the first day of school. It wasn't too bad. I only had Biology today. Lauren and I met up after class and chilled at the apartment for a while. Went to Phillip's, fell asleep. Now I'm at home in Clemmons. My mom is in Washington DC for the weekend and I'm dog/house sitting. I dunno what I'm doing tonight. I know Lauren and I are gonna eat dinner with Charlie. I can't wait to see his tattoo. I can't wait to get a new tattoo. Or piercing. Or a job. Man. Anyone know any ways to make money without getting a normal job? Jewel is chewing on her tail, it's some cuteness. My journal is so boring haha, no wonder nobody reads it. I dunno if I can post pictures on this, if I could that would be more fun.		  
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But in her secret heart she rides   
06:27pm 20/08/2003
 
mood: full
music: Harvey Danger
Things I need to do:
Mail the power bill
Get a job
Get the internet @ the apartment
More stuff I can't remember

Man, everything revolves around money. That's dumb. School starts Friday. I don't know if I'm happy about that or not. Because I don't really want to get up at seven in the morning. But it'll be okay. I don't know if I wanna get a job right at the beginning of the school year. I kind of want to see how I do with that load first. But some extra money would be nice. I'm never really without money, my parents spoil me rotten, but still, it's nice to earn your own. And I feel like such a slack loser for not having a job. Hum. But if I don't get a job, I can get a dog. I'm staying at the house in Clemmons this weekend; My mom is going out of town so I'm watching Jewel. I think I let her down, she doesn't seem to love me as much as she used to. Maybe she's just getting over me haha. Anyhow.		  
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Had a lovely brunch with Jesus Christ   
07:03pm 11/08/2003
 
mood: calm
music: All American Rejects... Please don't hate me for that
Hum. I'm at home doing research on Internet Service Providers to try to decide what Lauren and I should get for the apartment. Cable is expensive. Those things that are all like 9 bucks a month are all dial up and we don't even have a phone line. So oh well, most of the cable ones are like 40 bucks a month, that's just twenty each for me and Lauren. That's not too bad. I think I wanna try to get my dragon tattoo started soon. Or maybe I'll go get ZEN with Lauren. That would be fun. I don't know, I just want to get tattooed soon! I read The Lovely Bones yesterday. Yeah, the whole book. It was really good. I've read a few fairy tales by Oscar Wilde today. I really liked The League of Extrordinary Gentlemen. I want to go see it again. I hope if they make a sequel that it's damn good because I'm tired of crappy sequels. Oh I finished Cereus Blooms at Night, only took me a freakin' month to read it. My dog is being so cute. I want to get a pet at the apartment but I can't decide. I want to get a dog, but I'm gonna be at school and work, that's not enough time for a dog. I could get a couple ferrets so they can keep each other company... But ferrets aren't dogs and I want a dog. But it wouldn't be fair to the dog. Le Argh. Lauren wants to get a cat. I do too but I'm allergic. I can feel the effects after like an hour, I don't know if I could live with one. But we saw the cutest black kittens at PetSmart. I might get a job at PetSupermarket. I have a drug test tomorrow. Wish me luck. Ah, the end of summer. How bittersweet it is.		  
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Had a lovely brunch with Jesus Christ   
07:03pm 11/08/2003
 
mood: calm
music: All American Rejects... Please don't hate me for that
Hum. I'm at home doing research on Internet Service Providers to try to decide what Lauren and I should get for the apartment. Cable is expensive. Those things that are all like 9 bucks a month are all dial up and we don't even have a phone line. So oh well, most of the cable ones are like 40 bucks a month, that's just twenty each for me and Lauren. That's not too bad. I think I wanna try to get my dragon tattoo started soon. Or maybe I'll go get ZEN with Lauren. That would be fun. I don't know, I just want to get tattooed soon! I read The Lovely Bones yesterday. Yeah, the whole book. It was really good. I've read a few fairy tales by Oscar Wilde today. I really liked The League of Extrordinary Gentlemen. I want to go see it again. I hope if they make a sequel that it's damn good because I'm tired of crappy sequels. Oh I finished Cereus Blooms at Night, only took me a freakin' month to read it. My dog is being so cute. I want to get a pet at the apartment but I can't decide. I want to get a dog, but I'm gonna be at school and work, that's not enough time for a dog. I could get a couple ferrets so they can keep each other company... But ferrets aren't dogs and I want a dog. But it wouldn't be fair to the dog. Le Argh. Lauren wants to get a cat. I do too but I'm allergic. I can feel the effects after like an hour, I don't know if I could live with one. But we saw the cutest black kittens at PetSmart. I might get a job at PetSupermarket. I have a drug test tomorrow. Wish me luck. Ah, the end of summer. How bittersweet it is.		  
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All I wanna do is stick my uh-uh-uh in you   
07:24pm 07/08/2003
 
mood: cheerful
music: People talking and video games
Nobody reads this but it's okay. I'm at Andy's house. We're doing the same thing we do tonight we do every night. But it'll be lots of fun because we're somewhere new with a couple different people and stuff. I wanna get a puppy. We went to PetSmart today and played with the cats for like an hour. I want a little boy black cat. But oh well. I'll talk to the doctor. I wanna get a puppy soon. We talked about boobies. Lauren is 32B, I'm 34B, Jen is 36B, isn't that hot shit? If any random strangers are reading this, you should leave comments. Lauren said she can't leave comments and that's dumb. Anyhow we're supposed to be getting pizza and instead I'm sitting on my ass writing in this thing. All the right love in all the right places, y'all.		  
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Destination unknown   
06:47pm 19/07/2003
 
mood: calm
music: Make Jah Music(By- I don't know)
Stuff's somewhat better now. I've spent a lot more time outside and stuff. The past few days have been nice. Reasonably calm, quiet, peaceful. People are still nuts. I try to stay out of it but I'm drawn to it out of curiousity. My mom is in North Wilkesboro tonight with Anita so I'm taking care of the dog. I'm trying to think of a good way to make money without getting a stupid job. I think I'm going to open a babysitting/petsitting/dogwalking business. Just take a CPR class, make some flyers, get my name out, whatnot. I think that might be the idea I need to stick with. I don't do well when I have a boss. But then again, I don't know if I have the self-discipline to do that. I dunno, maybe I'm thinking too hard about it. I think I'll give it a try. There's a CPR class coming up in early August I can take. Anyhow, keep it real, y'all.		  
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Crazy crazy people   
04:02pm 14/07/2003
 
mood: groggy
music: Sprung Monkey - Get em outta here
Man, I don't understand people. We complicate things so much. Trying to be helpful doesn't really work lately. Trying to take care of myself hasn't been working either. I dunno. I'm tryin' to get by. I'm just so anxious. I have such a hard time around people lately. I dunno. Not a lot is going on, but what little that does happen feels so extreme, it's like mega-stimulation. My mind just goes fuckin' nuts. I feel this pressure building inside my skull. I hope it's temporary. I need to chill myself out. I dunno how though. I don't know what to do to fix this. I don't want to go to the doctor because they'll just give me some new pill to regulate my personality. My friends have been going crazy though. Or at least it feels that way. Misinterpretation runs rampant lately. We need to work on our communication skills. But anyhow, enough out of me.		  
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I will make you her   
02:21pm 16/06/2003
  If I were a month I would be: August
If I were a day of the week I would be: Wednesday
If I were a time of day I would be:afternoon
If I were a planet I would be: Earth
If I were a sea animal I would be: an octopus
If I were a direction I would be: east
If I were a piece of furniture I would be: a bed
If I were a sin I would be: sloth
If I were a historical figure I would be: JESUS
If I were a liquid I would be: mercury?
If I were a stone, I would be:amethyst
If I were a tree, I would be: willow
If I were a bird, I would be: a parrot
If I were a tool, I would be: exacto knife
If I were a flower/plant, I would be: daisies
If I were a kind of weather, I would be: overcast but still decent
If I were a mythical creature, I would be: a faery, duh
If I were a musical instrument, I would be: upright bass or didjeridoo
If I were an animal, I would be: a dog
If I were a color, I would be: blue
If I were a vegetable, I would be: eggplant
If I were a sound, I would be: a constant humming
If I were an element, I would be: probably earth even though I'm a fire sign
If I were a car, I would be:a fuckin'ghetto-ass piece of crap
If I were a song, I would be: All Mixed Up, 311
If I were a book, I would be written by:
If I were a food, I would be: tofu
If I were a place, I would be: woods
If I were a material, I would be: cotton
If I were a taste, I would be: salty
If I were a scent, I would be: rubber
If I were a religion, I would be: druid?
If I were a word, I would be: the
If I were an object, I would be: a bracelet
If I were a body part I would be: upper arm
If I were a facial expression I would be: confusion
If I were a subject in school I would be: lunch
If I were a cartoon character I would be: brendan from Home Movies
If I were a shape I would be a: parallelogram?
If I were a number I would be: 5		  
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Could yoooour man use a big saussagge soon?   
06:13pm 11/06/2003
  So we've moved into the new apartment. It's been really crazy. Lots of weird nights. I think we've had three nights without anybody over. But we're trying to behave. In a different sense haha. I miss my dog a lot. But I'm at my mom's house right now so Jewel is here. Eventually I might update this thing more. Maybe. Right now Charlie, Lauren, and I are waiting for Alex to show up, but I'm s'posed to hang out with Phillip tonight and stuff soooo yeah this thing is weird.  
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I like you like a fat kid likes cake.   
03:20am 24/05/2003
 
mood: moody
music: Whatever floats into my head
I no longer feel like writing an entry. This journal addiction thing must be an aquired taste. But I kind of want that addiction because I need some way of keeping track of time. But fuck it, right now I'm just gonna say, stop stalking me! Hah...		  
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The answer is still the same.   
10:12pm 18/05/2003
 
mood: cranky
music: Harvey Danger - The Same as Being in Love
I'm in a bit of a bad mood. But oh well. I'll just go to bed and it'll be okay in the morning. I lost my temper a little bit tonight, at my mom. I hate it when I do that. I feel like such a bitch. I have a headache. I don't like typing in this thing yet.		  
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tornjacket
 
 
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