name_ Nancy // aliases_ anqelic // age_19 years old // sex_ gurLe // local_ Philadelphia, PA // statz_ stealing all the man-whores, he-bitches, and boy-t0ys I can my hands on // nationality_ chinese and vietnamese // occupation_ student

I am... nerdy // emo to the core // ever so pretty in pink // goth like whoa // punk loving // raving psycho without the drugs // brainy but lacking in common sense // different in that way where you don't know HOW to talk to me // graceful yet oh-so-clumsy // spontaneous // charming // stubborn // bratty // childlike yet mature // endearing // bored // sleepy // in love but never loved // jaded // cynical // bitter // short // spunky // crazed // devious // horny // a walking contradiction // bipolar // straight with weird fetishes // lazy // into BDSM a little too much // blissfully content with being single // cuddly // pudgy like a "mofo" // loner // 9th year flutist // an artist // a writer // 3rd year violinist // a performer

I enjoy... talking to my Chadwick // with completely random with virtual strangers // giving assholes verbal lashings when they deserve it // reading // designing webpages // writing // listening to music // performing music // kissing and other stuff // daydreaming // playing on the playground // chatting // flirting // drawing // performing live for people // helping people out // playing with my baby THOMAS! // being with my sweetie <33

My favorite books are... "The Godfather" by Mario Puzo // "A tree grows in Brooklyn" by Betty Smith // "Love, Remember Me" by Bertice Small // "Chances" by Jackie Collins // "The Kitchen God's Wife" by Amy Tan // Harry Potter Series, by J. K. Rowlings // The Phantom Tollbooth by Norton Juster // "Romeo and Juliet " by William Shakespeare // Zen and the Art of Motorcyle Maintenance by Robert Pirsig // The Diary of a Teenage Girl by Phoebe Glockner // Trainspotting by Irvine Welsh

My favorite movies... Snatch // The Godfather I and II // Bridget Jones' Diary // Harry Potter and the Chamber of Secrets // Harry Potter and the Sorcerers' Stone // Se7en // Nightmare on Elm Street // Lock, Stock and Two Smoking Barrels // The Matrix // Clerks // Chasing Amy // Braveheart // Fight Club // Twelve Monkeys // Die Hard // Face/Off // Philadelphia // High Fidelity // Catch me if you can

I've had  visitors stop by. <3

Layout History

oo1. Basic black and white anime (overrides)
oo2. Black and blue anime (overrides)
oo3. Seraphim (anime) pastels (overrides)
oo4. Gothic Catherdral - done in blues and greys
oo5. Marilyn Manson- Man that you fear - First layout designed by me (overrides and styles)
oo6. The Crow with lyrics from "Bring me to life" by Evanescence
oo7. The Crow with lyrics from "Hollow" by Epsilon-Zero
oo8. Evanescence background in light blue
oo9. Linkin Park layout with Easier to run lyrics
o1o. Linkin Park, my first real style
o11. Parasite Eve style [current layout] designed completely by moi.

Quotable Quotes
"How can I exist without you" - Shame by Stabbing westward
"When we hold each other, in the darkness, it doesn't make the darkness go away. The bad things are still out there. The nightmares still walking. When we hold each other we feel not safe, but better.'It's all right' we whisper, 'I'm here, I love you.' and we lie: 'I'll never leave you.' For just a moment or two the darkness doesn't seem so bad. " Neil Gaiman. (For some reason, my ex always comes to mind when I think of this quote)
Have you ever been in love? Horrible isn't it? It makes you so vulnerable. It opens your chest and it oepns up your heart and it means that someone can get inside you and mess you up. You build up all these defenses, you build up a whole suit of armor, so that nothing can hurt you, then one stupid person, no different from any other stupid person, wanders into your stupid life...You give them a piece of you. They didn't ask for it. They did something dumb one day, like kiss you or smile at you, and then your life isn't your own anymore. Love takes hostages. It gets inside you. It eats you out and leaves you crying in the darkness, so simple a phrase like 'maybe we should be just friends' turns into a glass splinter working its way into your heart. It hurts. Not just in the imagination. Not just in the mind. It's a soul-hurt, a real gets-inside-you-and-rips-you-apart pain. I hate love. - Neil Gaiman.
"Love is giving someone the power to completely destroy you yet trusting them not to."
"Choose life. Choose a job. Choose a career. Choose a family. Choose a fucking big television. Choose washing machines, cars, compact disc players and electrical tin openers...choose DIY and wondering who the fuck you are on a Sunday morning. Choose sitting on that couch watching mind-numbing, spirit crushing game shows, stuffing junk food into your mouth. Choose rotting away at the end of it all, pushing your last in a miserable home, nothing more than an embarrassment to the selfish, fucked up brats you spawned to replace yourself. Choose a future. Choose life. But why would I want to do a thing like that?" - Renton, Trainspotting
"If the people we love are stolen from us, the way to have them live on is to never stop loving them. Buildings burn. People die. But real love lives forever. "- Sarah, The Crow

Thursday, June 12, 2003
@ 09:42am
| Entry no.195 |
subject::  disgustingly ill
||   mood    sleepy   ||
||   music    the air conditioning.. jeez it's loud   ||

((cough and hacks up a lung)) Oh, yeah, that's always fun. I haven't been to bed yet, as usual, but this time my time was spent a little better. Whilst taking a shower, I came up with a conclusion to the story I've been writing for the past few months, or it could segue into a whole new story, like part I, part II, etc. I keep changing the names though, because I just don't think they fit, because it first takes place in 17th century France. Odd choice, but you write about what you know, and I'm a history buff. I know lots of little details about everything, and since I can speak basic french, I think I'm good to go. I've been driving myself crazy on how to conclude this story, or novella rather, since it's too long to be considered a story. I should probably get back to writing down the rest of this outline before I fall asleep and completely forget it. Blah, that just reminds me, I need to get back to writing the other story too. Blasted ideas, why must you always come in huge batches when I don't have enough time to write you all, and give me writers' block with only the ending to write?

Anywhoo. There's this beautiful person. This beautiful, beautiful, beautiful boy that drives me to weep at the very thought of him. Every fiber of his being beams out a brilliant radiance, and the goodness shines through, you can see the very essence of his purity, his strength in his soul, and the love in his heart. All of you people reading this, you don't know who he is, and I refuse to mention his name, because I refuse to share him. This beautiful boy walked into my life, but not ever walk about because his imprint'll be with me forever. In our short time left, I want to spend it making him smile, make him think nothing but lovely thoughts, and have great days with him. Why must fate be so cruel as to take away something so lovely? God has a plan for everyone? No, God doesn't. Only the good die young? Could be, I'll be the one left here alone, wondering why someone like him will be taken away when he was brought into my life such a short while ago. Ah, I'm starting to feel sad about the whole situation, but then I start thinking of *him*, and I can't help but smile. The pureness of a gentle spirit, how I [heart] thee.

[note] to everyone reading this. you do *not* know this little spirit of mine who I love so dearly, and I am NOT referring to any of you, so get off your high horse, and play with the peasants because that's where you belong. nanners [/note]

Anyways, I am going to go lay down in bed, finish the outline, write more (hopefully) and then pass out. <33 toodes

[ 2 ] deep dark secrets revealed  unburden your soul  ( memory/edit )

Friday, March 21, 2003
@ 08:41am
| Entry no.53 |
subject::  FRIENDS ONLY
||   mood    mischievous   ||
||   music    "bring me to life" - evanescence... (yes AGAIN)   ||

The last post was FRIENDS ONLY meaning if you're not on my friends list, your ass AINT reading it. nanners xP <33 toodles.

unburden your soul  ( memory/edit )

[ n.a.v.i.g.a.t.i.o.n ]
|| dwelling in  the present ||