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[21 Nov 2009|10:23am] |
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we broke up.
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[18 Nov 2009|11:49pm] |
it's nice to know that what i say is appreciated and means a lot
even if it's from a friend that is in love with another one of my friends
it means a lot to mean a lot
i want to say, that i really appreciate jon and ian
because they'll just listen to me talk no matter what
about anything
and sometimes think i am funny or humor me anyway
they build buildings so tall these days.
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[18 Nov 2009|11:30pm] |
little lola, i need to cuddle with you right now so badly.
i miss my doggy. and my mommy. a lot. a lot a lot.
and beer makes me incredibly happy with his feeling for amber.
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[17 Nov 2009|11:54pm] |
make up or break up = MAKE UP
wish my roommates would not babytalk all the time and talk like adults
wish my neighbor would not visit my roommate all the time who he should stay away from
wish my neighbor would not visit my roommate past 10? 11?
wish my neighbor would stay at his own apartment
wish my roommates were not so loud when they get up in the morning
or so loud with my neighbor before i go to bed.
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[15 Nov 2009|01:08pm] |
one disappointment after another
thinking about putting in my two weeks
work sucks
tired of fighting for a voice
these are all interconnected
wish i had more time to make art
probably gonna spend the day in the studio
with music and simple green and reductive
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[10 Nov 2009|08:52am] |
3 page heart pour and your response : a single text.
i give up
i don't know what i give up
but i just give up
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[03 Nov 2009|09:07pm] |
wait... do i have a boyfriend?
oh yea. i do.
right?
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[02 Nov 2009|07:14pm] |
Excuse me, Mrs. Busybody
Could you pencil me in?
Though we both know that the worst part about it
Is I would be free when you wanted me
If you wanted me
If you wanted me
the stupidest thing is
i just sit around and wait for you
when there are people who would wait for me
and i still wait for you
.... what the hell am i doing?
what the hell are you doing?
i have so much to do
I REALLY DO HAVE SO MUCH TO DO
yet you are the one who can't talk?
i don't understand
i really don't
i really really don't
what's going on here
crit tomorrow that i am so embarassed about
exam and paper on wednesday
exam on friday
exam on monday
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[02 Nov 2009|05:00pm] |
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he can't be here for me
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[02 Nov 2009|02:23am] |
why do people want me when they can't have me?
you had your chance before, don't tell me things like this now.
tired of fighting with the boy. first time he actually got at me today. it was kind of nice to see him show some kind of emotion.
so tired in general
slept so much the other night, i don't even know what happened
"was i awake then?" is what i had to ask a lot this morning
printed around 20 hours to have 20 crappy prints. i'm so disappointed and just beside myself
no time to fix it now
so many things have gone wrong and they look so dirty and messy
and someone called me a natural the other day. i want to live up to that.
no possible way of redeeming myself now
two exams and a 7 page paper coming up yesssss
life is rough. i'm tired. and worn out.
i need a break.
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[30 Oct 2009|10:27am] |
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waitin on love ain't so easy to do
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[30 Oct 2009|12:12am] |
what do i have?
sigh.
i need someone to talk to.
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[25 Oct 2009|12:27pm] |
Give me a reason to fall in love
Take my hand and let's dance
Give me a reason to make me smile
Cause I think I forgot how
I wanna fall asleep with you tonight
I wanna know that I am safe when you hold me tight
I wanna feel like I wanna feel forever
Girls need attention, and boys need us
So let's make everybody glad
That they have each other in each others arms
Oh let's make everybody glad
I want you
I wanna dream away with you tonight
We can go anywhere you would like
I wanna feel how I wanna feel forever
I want you
------
Every little thing I do, I do for you
With every little thing, I think a thought of you
And I try so hard not to notice
I try so hard not to care
I try so hard not to know that you're not here
But I'm counting down the hours
And I'm counting up the days
I try so hard not to show this side of me
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[25 Oct 2009|12:09pm] |
i've taken so many risks to ensure
and it's still doomed
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[20 Oct 2009|11:57pm] |
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all it takes is one good make out session to make the world right again
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[20 Oct 2009|03:15pm] |
periods are stupid.
gonna do my next screen print project comic book style ... if i ever get around to it
had extra clothes and then no clothes so i repurposed
then realized there are reasons they are extra clothes (tried to sell them, didn't work)
either i just wanna go shopping
put pictures on facebook
lol kinda forgot about the past for a brief moment
oh welllll
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[16 Oct 2009|11:51pm] |
can't write. gotta work.
miss you journal.
wish i could record more to you and wish that every entry wasn't so sad. and wish that i didn't only write to you when i am sad.
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[12 Oct 2009|09:55am] |
so that's how you choose to deal with this?
not helpful.
are you even listening to me?!
i can't even talk to you right now to tell you this because you haven't talked to me yet
IF I LIKE YOU TO TEXT ME IN THE MORNING --- WHY WOULD YOU NOT?!!??!
i need to concentrate really
i have an exam today
and i don't want to start crying now.
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[11 Oct 2009|04:46pm] |
telling you right now i have to be more indepedent (i don't want to have to be at all)
because you can't be what i want and need
... (and mostly are not trying)
and my amount of want and need is not reciprocated
and you don't understand
and mainly are just saying yea, i know you want this, okay you're going to stop wanting.
thanks for trying.
so now i am going to try
because goddamn i am so unhappy
i should not be like this
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