| hell day.. ahhh!!! | ||||
| 10:52am 04/30/2004 | ||||
**~I hate everything about you~** ~Three Days Grace~ |
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| This song is brought to you by.. | ||||
stressed| ..I swear that I can go on forever.. | ||||
| 8:07pm 04/28/2004 | ||||
**~I swear that I can go on forever, again~** ~Blink 182~ |
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| This song is brought to you by.. | ||||
cheerful| ..the infinite sadness.. | ||||
| 11:10pm 04/23/2004 | ||||
School is coming to a close soon.. I have like three weeks left or something.. so I have really been hitting the books like a good little girl and getting everything done that needs to be done. I even started to rewrite up my notes that I am going to need to study for my finals. Art 100, and CS 302 should be kick ass easy.. but I have some major work to do to pass ENG 241. I have to remember so many novels, we have read over 10.. so I really have to organize myself there.. shouldn't be too bad of a problem. Oh and yea.. the Professor for that class has just decided that she wants us to rewrite our research papers and expand our 5page paper into a 10 page paper by Friday with using ten resources instead of four.. so I bet you can guess what I'll be spending this weekend on. I think a majority of my papers and projects and unit plans are due this week.. so after this week everything else will be smooth sailing. I'm not too worried about it though, I'll do just fine. I dont know.. I feel pretty good lately (well except for yesterday because it was Thursday) but there is still something missing.. not entirely sure whats wrong.. but something just isnt right. I'll figure it out one day.. for now I'm just gonna focus on finishing this semester. Almost there so lets see how well that goes. Well thats all for now.. goodnight.. **~White it out like glittering wax butterflies~** ~The Used~ |
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| This song is brought to you by.. | ||||
| ..this car hears my confessions.. | ||||
| 9:50pm 04/22/2004 | ||||
**~On the way home, this car hears my confessions, I think tonight I'll take the long way..~** ~Dashboard Confessional~ |
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| This song is brought to you by.. | ||||
sore| ... | ||||
| 11:14pm 04/19/2004 | ||||
... |
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| This song is brought to you by.. | ||||
sad| ..an ode to no one.. | ||||
| 12:20am 04/19/2004 | ||||
Well I'm gonna try to sleep.. whatever.. goodnight .... |
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| This song is brought to you by.. | ||||
| woo hoo.. yay! | ||||
| 3:07am 04/14/2004 | ||||
Good night!!! **~I'm walking on sunshine.. woaho.. I'm walking on sunshine.. woahoao.. I'm walking on sunshine.. woaho.. and its time to feel good!~** ~Five Iron Frenzy (Cover)~ |
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| This song is brought to you by.. | ||||
excited| ... | |||
| 10:59am 04/01/2004 | |||
|
well its official.. i am officially a waste of life, time, and air.. plus i tried to reach out to someone who told me he would always be there for me.. and he completely ignored me.. who cares anymore.. i feel like driving into a tree.. |
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| This song is brought to you by.. | |||
| ..on the phone.. | ||||
| 12:35am 03/25/2004 | ||||
*Full Name: Melissa *Nicknames: Melis, Lissa, Liss, Mesilla, Tiny, ANGEL, Shortie, Sweetness *Age: I'm 20....but in 3 months I'll be 21!!! Woo Hoo!!! Party!!! *Birthday: June 20, 1983 *Zodiac sign: Gemini *Hospital where you were born: Good Samaritan Hospital, West Islip *Location: Islip Terrace.. the ‘horse country’, oh yea.. and we can’t forget about the neighbors across the street with the cow.. *Height: 5'.. *Hair Color: dark brown with red highlights.. my natural hair color rocks! *Eye Color: brown *Siblings : Karen, Meaghan, and John.. I do have a brother named Keith who I never met.. and then I have Greg and Jeff who are more like older brithers to me rather than uncles. *Hobbies: singing, anything to do with music-writing it, singing it, listening to it, writing poetry, and hanging out with friends and the sisters THE PAST SIDE *Memory [thing] you miss most: I do miss my dad.. *Memory you would like to forget: that I let an awesome opportunity pass me right by because I am a chicken shit.. *Last person you talked to on the phone: Chris *Last song you listened to: "Bloody Romance" by Senses Fail *TV show you wish they would re-air again: Ren and Stimpy- happy happy joy joy THE FUTURE SIDE *Occupation: Kindergarten or 1st grade teacher *Dream Car: 1969 Chevy Camaro.. hell yea! *Marriage: who knows, and don’t wanna depress myself thinking about it *Kids: someday.. hopefully *Future son's name: I really don’t know.. I haven’t found a name that I really like for a boy.. *Future daughter's name: Julianna *Honeymoon: hmmm.. well I’ve been to Hawaii.. so Italy.. I dream of seeing Italy *Where will you live?: I will never leave this Island.. I love it here *What are you doing tomorrow?: baking brownies, then going to SJC for the CSC bakesale, then work.. then probably home to sit in front of the computer for the rest of the night because I have nothing better to do with my life :/ THE FAVORITES SIDE *Food: pasta....actually lots...i like to eat.... *Drink: Dr. Pepper, Orange Juice, Pepsi, and Hot Cocoa.. if you're talking Alcohol then Sex on The Beach, or at this point I would just be happy with a beer *TV show: I dont really watch much T. V. anymore.. if I do I usually have FUSE on because they play more of the type of music I can enjoy *Movie: American History X, Supertroopers, Clerks, Mallrats *CD: ahhh.. way too much to name.. *Band/Group: so many kick ass band I really can't just pick one *Color: green, blue *Actor: Adam Sandler *Actress: Julia Stiles *Weekend Activity: sleeping late!!, hanging with either my kick ass friends or my kick ass family.. trying to relax.. *Day of the week: Sunday.. the only day that I am completely off from both school and work.. and all other strenuous activities.. *Month: June.. my b-day, jennnns b-day, kb's b-day, dad's b-day, summer.. *Book: The Cather In The Rye by J.D. Salinger *Holiday: X-Mas, the only time of year I get to see my entire family including second cousins and moms cousins.. I have an awesome family *Number: 3 *Cookie: I just eat plain chocolate chip cookie dough.. I may be a weirdo.. but I have found lot of others like me.. hehe *Phrase to overuse: dude.. or WHAT THE CRAP?!?!?! <~the best one righ KB.. hahaha *Toothpaste: hmmm.. mentadent *Ice Cream: Ben and Jerry's Phish Food ice cream!!!! the best.. or ANYTHING CHOCOLATE!!!! *Candy: Reeses Peanut Butter Cups, Twix, and the awesome Chocolate Marshmallow filled bunnies that CVS sells at Easter time.. lol *Teacher: Elementry- the Sustrin Twins (1st), Junior High/Middle School- Mr. Freed (s.s.)"hey did you know that Mr. Freed has a runway for flies on his head".. 9th grade center(I had to add this one in myself.. haha)- Foti- yea I know he was a dork.. but we had the best damn marching band ever.. B-wood H.S.- Mr. Dalpiaz- best band teacher, even better than Foti.. EIHS- Mrs. Sawicki College: Professor Lundin *Restaurant: Applebees *Fast Food: WENDY'S!!!.. nuff said.. *Channel: FUSE *Radio Station: i don't listen to the radio too much usually CD's, but if I have to 92.3- K-Roc *Type of music: emo/screamo/punk/new age/indie.. some rock/alternative.... *Song: not sure.. I'm an emotional rollercoster right now.. so there are a lot that fit in here *Music Video: 'I Miss You', by Blink 182.. they are cuties *Sport: baseball, street hockey. volleyball, occasionally I'll play some football (a shocker I know.. but this I do now play) *Website: www.plyrics.com (where I find new awesome bands, and where I find all my cool aways and quotes), or www.blurty.com (where I edit/update my online journal) *Relative: dude.. I have the best family in the entire world.. I can't pick just one person.. *Hangout: anywhere but here.. down by the water, bowling, pool house,at a friends house.. as long as I'm in good company, anywhere.. *Friend: oh man.. I have so many best friends.. by two bestest are Chris and Jenn because they have completely and totally been there for me unconditionally throughout my life and have helped me in emense ways with what me AND my family have gone through.. My sister Karen is also like my best friend.. she is always there for me when I need her the most!!! THE PEOPLE YOU KNOW SIDE: *Friends: Chris, Jenn, Mike, Tim, Jess, Johnny, Nikki, KB, Toni, Bryan, Lisa, Jen, Deb, Meridith, Erica.. do I have to name them all?? lol.. I love you all!! *Best Friend(s): Chris and Jenn and Karen *Funniest: they are all so damn funny in their own way *Silliest: KB, Toni, Bryan *Loudest: KB *Craziest: me and the SJC girls *Best at keeping secrets: Chris, Jenn, Tim, Karen *The one you have, but wish you didn't: ... *Smartest: Jennnnnnnnnn *Most innocent-looking: me! ;) ~that's why I'm called the Angel.. right guys? *Sweetest: ooohhh.. i cant chose one.. they are all sweet in their own awesome way *Weirdest: Bryan *Most hyper: Jess or Toni *Biggest pervert(s): haha.. most definately Chris.. haha.. *Quietest: me THE ONE OR THE OTHER SIDE: *Linkin Park OR Eminem: Linkin Park *Peanut butter OR Jelly: mostly jelly.. i don't like peanut butter.. except in Reese's Peanut Butter Cups *Coke OR Pepsi: most definately Pepsi *Boxers OR Briefs: Boxers *MTV OR VH1: FUSE *Apples OR Oranges: both *Vanilla OR Chocolate: CHOCOLATE (oh come on you knew that was coming) *Flowers OR Candy: Candy!! *Dawson's Creek OR Felicity: neither.. ewwwwww... *Comedy OR Horror: both! *Book OR Magazine: neither *TV OR Radio: Radio/CD's *Is the glass half full OR half empty?: umm.. actually its filled to the top.. in fact it spilled over the top and spilled all over the floor.. just my luck :( *Killer OR Cop (in a movie of course): i dont know THE HAVE YOU EVER SIDE: *Been on a plane: yup.. 13 hours to Hawaii baby! *Cried in public: unfortunately yea *Climbed a tree: of course *Fell asleep in a Movie Theater: nope *Met a celebrity: well.. I met Eddie and Adam of Taking Back Sunday (because my uncles friends with Eddie) does that count? *Met the president: nope *Been scared to get a shot: no *Gotten a cavity: NEVER HAD ONE IN MY ENTIRE LIFE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! *Shopped at Spencer's: of course *Said, "I love you," and meant it: I thought I meant it.. now I'm just waiting to find the one person who I can truely say it to who will say it and mean it to me in return *Made prank calls: I haven't personally.. but I've watched and listened to people do it THE QUESTIONS THAT DON'T MATTER, BUT I'M STILL ASKING SIDE *Do you sleep with a stuff animal?: no.. when I go to bed I take them all off the bed and throw them on the floor *Last time you showered: about 4 hours ago *If you were a crayon, what color would you be?: green.. my favorite color *How many buddies do you have on your list?: almost 200 *Do you like this survey?: ehh...it's keeping me busy.... *One pillow or two, cotton or feather?: I have a bunch on my bed.. but I usually just use one of them to sleep with.. and they are cotton *Last CD you bought: I think the newest Coheed and Cambria.. but I dont remember.. its been a while *How long are you in the shower?: about a half hour *How do you eat a Reese's Peanut Buttercup?:i just bite right into it.. mmmm... *Feelings on abortion: ... *Thoughts on Britney Spears: all fake.. which to me is sad.. no one should change their body or themselves just to be liked or adored.. *Who do you most admire?: probably my mother.. she is the strongest woman I know *Right, Left, or Ambidextrous?: ambidextrous *What is on your mouse pad?: i don't have a mouse pad, I have a desktop calendar.. and thats what my mouse is on *What other language (besides English) can you speak or understand?: Spanish.. only if its written down, and I'm given enough time to figure it out.. also sign language woah.. I started this when I was on the phone with Johnny and Chris.. haha.. then hung up with them.. and decided to actually finish it and put it in the journal.. not that anyone really cares.. but that took care of my boredom.. sorry guys.. now that I bored you to death. It was quite interesting.. Chris sent me an IM to call his house so I did.. and he knew right away something was wrong.. and wouldnt get off my back about it.. then he got pissed at me because I wouldnt tell him, and that bothered and worried him.. so then Johnny was at his house so I talked to them bothe for a bit back and forth.. then finally Chris gave me a lecture on actaully calling people when I need someone to talk to.. and what not.. but in the end they helped me to feel a little better about my night.. so whatever.. ok.. well now I'm tired so I'm going to bed.. **~lost inside another crash, the bones I had turned into ash~** ~Senses Fail~ |
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| This song is brought to you by.. | ||||
drained| ..neverender.. | ||||
| 10:03pm 03/24/2004 | ||||
So then all of that went ok.. and then the next part of the day just went to hell. Don't really want to talk about it much.. and I think the 'X' man is finally out of the picture. Don't know if thats good or bad.. whatever. The weird thing of the night is that I received a phone call from Johnny.. wanna talk about random and unexpected?!?!?!. I don't know what to say. Well.. it was definately awkward.. I just dont know. He told me when we broke up that he would call me in a few days and just never called.. now its like months later and he just calls out of nowhere.. and I just dont know.. then the rest of the night pretty much just sucked from there.. getting yelled at by everyone you can think of for no reason.. I'm so confused.. what is wrong with me.. Well.. then I went for a drive to clear my head, and went by the water for a bit, and I wanted to just dive into the water and let the waves just take me away.. that'd be nice.. wouldn't it??? So then I went home, and mom sent me out to SNS to get some things for dinner that she forgot to pick up or whatever.. so I went with Meggles.. we ended up seeing Timmy Tim.. which felt good.. one because I havent seen him or even talked to him in the longest, and also because this time when he saw me he didnt just walk right pass me or avoid me.. he actually stopped and said hi.. so that was a nice change of pace from him.. it made me feel a bit ok.. because i felt like he hated me.. eh.. i still think that.. what am I saying.. and he probably does.. i'd hate me if I were him.. because I'm just a waste ya know? wait.. I hate me and I'm not him.. so that goes to show you.. he scared me because he was coming into the building as we were going out of the building but I didnt see him, because I was too busy watching Meg almost walk into something.. that was pretty hysterical.. I think thats the most I laughed all day (which was not actually a lot at all).. Well.. I havent heard from Jenn today.. I called her and she said she was ok today, but she was with Mike talking to him.. so I hung up with her, because it is much more important for her to figure things out with him.. so.. that is that.. feeling like shit right now.. feeling worthless.. nothing new.. so I will leave you with that.. shitty I know.. but what did you expect from me.. I'm so lost. goodnight **~so i guess this is where I lie, where the days are endless and the nights, they just dont belong~** ~Senses Fail~ |
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| This song is brought to you by.. | ||||
| ..The Ground Folds(acoustic).. | ||||
| 5:30pm 03/24/2004 | ||||
On a starlit and moon-struck night. The ground did fold and eat us both But all my love, I did devote. Beneath the rafters the angels sing Spinning violence and playing with my heart. (This song) I wrote, for you to see. And my heart it now breaks And the blood spilled down your spine Lost inside another crash The bones I had, turned into ash. The world did cry, the night you died And I am no good at suicide. Beneath the rafters the angels sing Spinning violence and playing with my heart. (This song) I wrote, for you to see. And my heart it now breaks And the blood spilled down your spine And I lost what was mine, and I want what was mine. And I lost what was mine, and I want what was mine. My heart now it always breaks, the blood did drip and I did take, another wish, another kiss, no more will for me to kill. We'd run away in our dismay, but please, come back to me. ~Senses Fail~ |
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| This song is brought to you by.. | ||||
bored| ..what genre of rock are you.. | ||||
| 5:27pm 03/24/2004 | ||||
 Emo! You're very in touch with your emotions and that's what I like about you! It's all about the music for you... I have pity for your tortured soul... What genre of rock are you? brought to you by Quizilla |
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| This song is brought to you by.. | ||||
| Weather's here, Wish you were beautiful.. | ||||
| 12:17am 03/23/2004 | ||||
**~I just want someone to be there on my birthday, I just want someone to get real drunk with.. I just want someone who needs someone to need them Cause I've got nothing left.. that I believe in~** ~the Benjamins~ |
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| This song is brought to you by.. | ||||
| ..I had a bad day again.. | ||||
| 10:31pm 03/22/2004 | ||||
She said I would not understand, Left a note and said "I'm sorry I Had a bad day again." She spilled her coffee, broke her shoe lace, Smeared the lipstick on her face, Slammed the door and said, "I'm sorry I Had a bad day again." And she swears there's nothing wrong. I hear her playing that same old song. She puts me up and puts me on. And had a bad day again. She said I would not understand. Left a note and said, "I'm sorry I Had a bad day again." Nuuhuuhuu And she swears there's nothing wrong. I hear her playing that same old song. She puts me up and puts me on. Oh and I had a bad day again. She said I would not understand. She left a note and said, "I'm sorry I Had a bad day again." She left a note and said, "I'm sorry I Had a bad day." Alright, ooooo, ooohhhhh. ~Fuel~ |
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| This song is brought to you by.. | ||||
irritated| 1:37pm 03/22/2004 | ||||
Then after that torturous class I had to go get some blood work done. Now everyone knows how much I totally HATE needles, and blood.. therefore I'm just not a happy camper right now. I got it done at 1, and it just finally stopped bleeding.. lucky me. Now I'm going to work where I'll be probably stressed out of my mind. **~So slice open my veins.. ..and let the romance bleed away~** ~Senses Fail~ |
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| This song is brought to you by.. | ||||
pissed off| Three Evils (Embodied In Love And Shadow) | ||||
| 4:20pm 03/21/2004 | ||||
I just dont know... **~dear my friends in the time we've spent forever after beyond this when will our nightmare ever end?~** ~Coheed and Cambria~ |
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| This song is brought to you by.. | ||||
| .......... | ||||
| 3:18am 03/21/2004 | ||||
Went out to play pool with Jenn and Jess.. its been a while since I hung out with them.. it was fun. Jenn I'm here for you when you need me.. do not hesitate to call! I love you sis!<3 ................ |
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| This song is brought to you by.. | ||||
surprised| ..girls just wanna have fun.. | ||||
| 2:55am 03/20/2004 | ||||
**~Tonight, tonight, it's on tonight~** ~Good Charlotte~ |
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| This song is brought to you by.. | ||||
| ..Copper And Stars.. | ||||
| 1:38pm 03/19/2004 | ||||
**************************************** deadboydown: wasnt clinton an inspiration to manwhores everywhere? Tinylilangel03: haha.. i guess so deadboydown: ah...ur obviously not political deadboydown: haha...cuz that was the most political statement ever **************************************** Tinylilangel03: why do white boys think that all they have to do is watch BET and they turn black? deadboydown: you mean there's more to it? deadboydown: hahaha ^Oh man.. he cracks me up.. Yea.. so Joey is leaving soon.. so I wont see my buddy anymore.. he wont help me through my days.. that sucks dude.. ahhhh!!! Yea.. so as things get a little better.. something else goes wrong.. whatever.. everything sucks.. everyone sucks.. or not.. In actuality I think its just I'm the one who sucks.. at life.. errr.. Well atleast I'm going out to have a fun time tonight.. and hopefully it kicks major ass.. well.. I have work soon.. so later dudes.. Brief summary of your name: Melissa Your name of Melissa gives you a clever mind, good business judgment, a sense of responsibility, and an appreciation of the finer things of life. You are serious-minded and not inclined to make light of things even in little ways, and in your younger years you had more mature interests than others your age. Home and family mean a great deal to you and it is natural that you should desire the security of a peaceful, settled home environment where you can enjoy the companionship of family and friends. Whatever you set out to accomplish you do your very best to complete in accordance with what you consider to be right. http://www.kabalarians.com/index.cfm just had to add that.. that made me feel ever so slightly better about myself for a good 2.5 second.. I guess I do have some good qualities.. yea.. too bad they are invisible to the world.. **~and i don't want to say that i wasted my days chasing instead of catching keeping. wasting wishes on copper and stars. i'm wanting you to save me and i'm not only asking. because i can face this falling it's just the taking that i fell. i'm breaking down~** ~Planes Mistaken For Stars~ |
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| This song is brought to you by.. | ||||
| ..starting to fashion and idea in my head.. | ||||
| 10:53pm 03/16/2004 | ||||
Well.. I guess for the remainder of this vacation I will try to make the best of it.. I'm hoping that I get another chance when I get back.. most of you know what I'm talking about.. and this time I'll make sure I don't let it pass me by.. haha.. loser. Well.. everyone.. I'm gonna go, so have a good night, and sleep tight.. nighty night all!!! **~But for now, I'll look, so longingly. Waiting...for you to want me, for you to need me, for you to notice...me~** ~Dashboard Confessional~ |
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| This song is brought to you by.. | ||||
cranky| ..and all that followed fell like mercury to hell.. | ||||
| 11:05pm 03/15/2004 | ||||
goodnight **~and I dont dream, since I quit sleeping.. and I haven't slept since I met you..~** ~Alkaline Trio~ |
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| This song is brought to you by.. | ||||
depressed| ... | ||||
| 10:24pm 03/09/2004 | ||||
**~its amazing how special you can make me feel just by smiling at me from across the room.. now if only somehow our words could connect~** ~Me~ |
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| This song is brought to you by.. | ||||
| ..lonely lost shoe.. | ||||
| 11:14pm 03/07/2004 | ||||
**~and I will be, I will be just lost~** ~Senses Fail~ |
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| This song is brought to you by.. | ||||
bitchy| Between the never and the now.. | ||||
| 10:12pm 03/06/2004 | ||||
**~Another wasted day, another moment slips away~** ~the Amazing Transparent Man~ |
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| This song is brought to you by.. | ||||
intimidated| ..everywhere but home.. | ||||
| 11:39pm 03/02/2004 | ||||
**~I'll make my way back home when I learn to fly~** ~Foo Fighters~ |
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| This song is brought to you by.. | ||||
content| same ol' same.. | ||||
| 12:34am 03/02/2004 | ||||
**~I need to believe that something extraordinary is possible~** ~A Beautiful Mind~ |
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| This song is brought to you by.. | ||||
lethargic| 12:18am 03/01/2004 | ||||
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| This song is brought to you by.. | ||||
restless| ...???... | ||||
| 11:56pm 02/28/2004 | ||||
**~Please just don't play with me My paper heart will bleed This wait for destiny won't do, be with me please i beseech you~** ~the All American Rejects~ |
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| This song is brought to you by.. | ||||
tired| ..wish i was too dead to cry.. | ||||
| 10:07pm 02/27/2004 | ||||
My self-affliction fades Stones to throw at my creator Masochists to which I cater You don't need to bother; I don't need to be I'll keep slipping farther But once I hold on, I won't let go 'til it bleeds Wish I was too dead to care If indeed I cared at all Never had a voice to protest So you fed me shit to digest I wish I had a reason; my flaws are open season For this, I gave up trying One good turn deserves my dying You don't need to bother; I don't need to be I'll keep slipping farther But once I hold on, I won't let go 'til it bleeds Wish I'd died instead of lived A zombie hides my face Shell forgotten with its memories Diaries left with cryptic entries And you don't need to bother; I don't need to be I'll keep slipping farther But once I hold on, I won't let go 'til it bleeds You don't need to bother; I don't need to be I'll keep slipping farther But once I hold on: I'll never live down my deceit ~Stone Sour~ |
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| This song is brought to you by.. | ||||
blank| 11:42pm 02/26/2004 | ||||
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| This song is brought to you by.. | ||||
| (I hate) Everything About You | ||||
| 2:22pm 02/26/2004 | ||||
After every hit we take Every feeling that I get But I haven’t missed you yet Every roommate kept awake By every sigh and scream we make All the feelings that I get But I still don’t miss you yet Only when I stop to think about it I hate everything about you Why do I love you I hate everything about you Why do I love you Every time we lie awake After every hit we take Every feeling that I get But I haven’t missed you yet Only when I stop to think about it I hate everything about you Why do I love you I hate everything about you Why do I love you Only when I stop to think About you, I know Only when you stop to think About me, do you know I hate everything about you Why do I love you You hate everything about me Why do you love me I hate You hate I hate You love me I hate everything about you Why do I love you ~Three Days Grace~ |
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| This song is brought to you by.. | ||||
| ..if we run far away do you think we will ever die.. | ||||
| 11:21pm 02/24/2004 | ||||
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| This song is brought to you by.. | ||||
| ..free fall without a parachute.. | ||||
| 11:32pm 02/23/2004 | ||||
**~But every dream could never come true..~** ~Senses Fail~ |
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| This song is brought to you by.. | ||||
| ..what it is to burn.. | ||||
| 3:32am 02/23/2004 | ||||
*Wolfman014: hi Auto response from TinyLilAngel03: I'm about to ruin my life.. wish me luck.. :-( out for the night, call me if you are nice enough to save me.. ..she burns.. Wolfman014: miss ya kiddo* ^this made me smile for the first time tonight.. then it made me cry.. atleast someone out there cares.. thanks BenT **~..she burns..~** ~Finch~ |
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| Falling Bomb.. 1 - This song is brought to you by.. | ||||
| ..todays on fire.. | ||||
| 2:47am 02/23/2004 | ||||
today is fire, and she burns.. **~SHE BUUUUUUURNS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!~** ~Finch~ |
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| This song is brought to you by.. | ||||
| bored.. yet wired.. dont wanna sleep.. | ||||
| 3:44am 02/21/2004 | ||||
Matchbook Romance Early November Lagwagon Inspection 12 Senses Fail Sunny Day Real Estate Allister A.nd You Will Know Us By The Trail Of Dead Coheed and Cambria AFI Story of the Year Count the Stars (International) Noise Conspiracy Ok Go 2) Have you ever had a song written about you?: yes.. by my bestest boy.. not necessarily something he could turn into a hit.. but its good stuff.. lol ;) 3) What song makes you cry?: well.. at different times different things.. 4) What song makes you happy? 'Best of Me', by the Startingline 5) What do you like to listen to before bed? Depends on what I am in the mood for.. a p p e a r a n c e HEIGHT: 5'.. I know.. I’m a little shortie! HAIR COLOR: Dark Brown with red highlights.. my natural haircolor rocks! SKIN COLOR: I have that olive Italian kinda skin EYE COLOR: brown.. boring.. I know PIERCINGS: Ears.. soon to be belly button and maybe tounge.. TATTOOS: Not yet.. very soon though.. shhhhhhh! r i g h t n o w WHAT COLOR PANTS ARE YOU WEARING?: blue jeans WHAT SONG ARE YOU LISTENING TO?: “Change” by Good Charlotte WHAT TASTE IS IN YOUR MOUTH?: chocolate cream filled donut from Dunkin Donuts WHAT'S THE WEATHER LIKE?: dude its freakin freezing! HOW ARE YOU?: wired!!!.. I should be catching up on sleep but I don’t feel like sleeping d o y o u GET MOTION SICKNESS?: yes.. I can’t read in any moving vehicle, and I cannot ride in the back seat of a car.. HAVE A BAD HABIT?: yea GET ALONG WITH YOUR PARENTS?: yea.. I have great parents f a v o r i t e s TV SHOW: One Tree Hill- Chad Michael Murray, and James Lafferty.. need I say more! ;) CONDITIONER: what ever my mother decides to buy BOOK: ‘The Catcher In The Rye’ by J. D. Salinger MAGAZINE: usually none, but occasionally Alternative Press NON-ALCOHOLIC DRINK: Dr. Pepper, Orange Juice, Pepsi, and Hot Cocoa ALCOHOLIC DRINK: Sex on the Beach THING TO DO ON THE WEEKEND: SLEEP, relax, hangout with friends or my sisters (who are also some of my best friends) BAND OR GROUP or SINGER or RAPPER: do I really have to choose?! Brand New.. or Thursday.. or Yellow Card.. or Blink 182.. or Senses Fail.. or.. h a v e y o u BROKEN THE LAW: maybe ;) RAN AWAY FROM HOME: never! SNUCK OUT OF THE HOUSE: maybe ;) shhhh! EVER GONE SKINNY DIPPING: yup MADE A PRANK PHONE CALL: not me personally but I’ve been witness to other people doing it.. lol.. pretty funny EVER TIPPED OVER A PORTA POTTY: hey.. as a matter of fact.. umm.. nope USED YOUR PARENTS' CREDIT CARD BEFORE: no.. I’m the only abnormal teen that NEVER takes money from my parents.. I do it all on my own.. (thank god for SRS Pharmacy! Lol) SKIPPED SCHOOL BEFORE: of course FELL ASLEEP IN THE SHOWER/BATH: oh yea.. speaking of that... where do these questions come from? BEEN IN A SCHOOL PLAY: no LET A FRIEND CRY ON YOUR SHOULDER: yup l o v e BOYFRIEND: nope.. I’m a loser in that area of my life :( GIRLFRIEND: i have lots of girl friends SEXUALITY: Hetero CHILDREN: none yet, and none for several more years to come CURRENT CRUSH: everyone and there mom probably know the answer to this one.. lol BEEN IN LOVE?: well I thought I was once upon a time, but I was wrong.. but I have found the love of my life, but how can I tell him.. :( HAD A HARD TIME GETTING OVER SOMEONE: yea.. and I’m still having a hard time getting over him after all these years.. BEEN HURT?: of course.. everytime.. YOUR GREATEST REGRET: letting my sister date a low-life dirtbag.. but unlike him we know when enough is enough.. and we don’t have to run to mommy to fight our fights.. GONE OUT WITH A SOMEONE YOU ONLY KNEW FOR THREE DAYS: yea.. r a n d o m DO YOU HAVE A JOB: Pharmacy Technician at the Shop Right Supermarket of Bay Shore YOUR CD PLAYER HAS IN IT RIGHT NOW: Good Charlotte and Senses Fail IF YOU WERE A CRAYON, WHAT COLOR WOULD YOU BE?: green.. WHAT MAKES YOU HAPPY?: My awesome family, and my amazing friends WHO MAKES YOU THE HAPPIEST?: I can’t just pick one person.. I have so many amazing people in my life.. WHAT'S THE NEXT CD YOU'RE GONNA GET?: Not sure yet.. I have to head over to Looney Tunes soon.. WHO DO YOU CONSIDER BEST FRIENDS?: Chris, Jenn, Mike, Lisa, Joey Joe, Karen, Meaghan WHAT DO YOU LIKE TO DO?: listen to music, hang out with my friends, shop, drive, watch movies w h e n / w h a t w a s t h e l a s t TIME YOU CRIED?: the other day.. don’t ask YOU GOT A REAL LETTER?: last year.. THING YOU PURCHASED: a dozen Dunkin Donuts TV PROGRAM YOU WATCHED: I don’t really watch too much T.V. the only show I watch is One Tree Hill, and as it is KB has to tape it for me so I get to see the full episode whenever I have time. y o u r t h o u g h t s o n ABORTION: in certain situations it could be ok.. but I’m definitely against it as a birth control method.. if you think you are mature enough to be that intimate in your relationship, then you should be mature enough to accept the consequences TEENAGE SMOKING: horrible.. don’t do it.. trust me, I’ve seen what it can do to a person.. :( beside.. it looks foolish.. SPICE GIRLS: what the crap?!?!? DREAMS: don’t come true, or atleats I am yet to have my dreams come true.. but they are weird sometime.. or confusing.. yea.. I was bored yet wired so I needed something to keep me busy.. Thanks Joey Joe for the survey that probably bored everyone half to death!!! **~Cause from the first time i saw you, I only thought about you. I didnt know you, I wanted to hold onto, The things youd never say to me, Cause you said.. You can't change the way you feel (i could never do that, i could never do that), but you cant tell me this aint real, cause this is real (and you would see right through that), And In the end its all ive got (so I'm gonna hold onto that), So im gunna hold, On and on and on and on..~** ~Good Charlotte~ |
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| This song is brought to you by.. | ||||
| ..it all comes down on me.. | ||||
| 10:49am 02/18/2004 | ||||
I don't know.. I've been second guessing about talking to that certain someone and telling him how I truely feel about him and things that have been going on between us. I mean is it worth ruining a friendship? I lasted seven years being freinds with him and having feelings for him. I know they haven't been this strong throughout the seven years we've been friends.. but I've been able to get through it thus far.. why not just let it go.. right? I'm afraid of ruining the closeness and the friendship that we have. Karen said if it ruins our friendship, was it really that strong or great of a friendship in the first place?, and I guess she is right about that. I mean him and I have literally been through hell and back, and there have been periods throughout our relationship where we didn't talk for months at a time. Him and I even went a whole year back, when I dated Dan, without talking.. yet we made it through all of that and we are stronger than ever.. there is just something holding me back from telling him. I mean I know what we have, and its perfect and great.. I guess I'm just afraid I'm going to ruin it. I know.. I'm probably the biggest wuss in the entire damn world.. but nothing usually ever goes right for me, and I just don't want this to go wrong.. therefore if I don't say anything, the chances of me ruining something great are small. Its funny though.. when I finally decided to go for it, and I called him.. he wasn't around.. figures. Well.. everything happens for a reason.. right? Well.. i guess that just means I'm not gonna go through with it after all. I consider him my best friend.. and that is because Jenn is more than that.. shes more like my sister. Some people say "you must risk things in life in order to gain happiness" but I don't know if this is worth the risk, and I'm so confused.. I don't know what the right thing to do is... :( I guess for the first time in my life I'm giving up... Well.. I'm ehausted and I have to go teach the fifth graders tomorrow morning.. so I think I am going to attempt that thing people call sleep.. wish me luck! Goodnight all.. **~Open the door, And show me your face tonight. I know it's true, No one heals me like you, And you hold the key. Never again, would I turn away from you. I'm so heavy tonight, But your love is alright, And I do believe.. That not everything is gonna be the way, you think it ought to be. It seems like every time I try to make it right, it all comes down on me. Please say honestly, you won't give up on me.. And I shall believe.. I shall believe~** ~the red Thread (Cover of a Sheryl Crow song)~ |
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| Falling Bomb.. 1 - This song is brought to you by.. | ||||
gloomy| will it ever go, will it ever go my way.. | ||||
| 10:27am 02/16/2004 | ||||
I've been doing a lot of thinking lately on some subjects, and especially one in particular. I need to tell someone improtant and very close to me how much he means to me and how I feel. I've been so afraid to do this because I am afraid of losing one of the most important people in my life. I'm really not good with confrontations, and I get too emotional sometimes.. therefor I'm sure I would not only ruin things but make a fool out of myself.. I decided that its something that needs to be said though so I have to do it, and now I'm just waiting for him to come around again. It figures though.. when I finally get the courage to go through with it hes not around and I dont here from him.. so now I'm just wait for him to call back. Oh man.. I need to go to the eye doctor because I need a new perscription. I also have a bunch of other doctors that I need to go see such as the endochronologist because of my thyroid problem and what not. For those of you who always wondered how could I possibly eat so much and not gain any weight.. its because I have an overactive thyroid.. which means my metabolizm works in overdrive.. but I have to get my levels checked and what not. However.. my insurance company dicided to drop me, and now in order to get put back on I need to go through getting proof that I'm a full time student and all that wonderful stuff again.. even though I did that all last year.. so now I can't see a doctor for like two weeks until they add me back on.. thats why I haven't gotten any medication to help me get over this sinus infection. Oh well.. I guess I'll manage somehow.. :( Chris had a bit of a car situation. That sucks. I hope he feels better!!! I haven't hung out with him in a while. hmm.. well.. I'm exhausted so i think I'm gonna attempt to go to bed.. wish me luck, cause I'm gnna need it.. fuckin nose! **~And now you've got me watchin your eyes (got me watchin just to see, watchin just to see) You got me waitin just to see (if you'll ever look at me) If it goes the way it never will (but will it ever go, will it ever go my way) Your eyes are watchin me.~** ~Good Charlotte~ |
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| This song is brought to you by.. | ||||
| ............................ | ||||
| 11:45am 02/15/2004 | ||||
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| This song is brought to you by.. | ||||
| Happy Valentines Day! | ||||
| 8:40pm 02/14/2004 | ||||
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| This song is brought to you by.. | ||||
thoughtful| Happy Valentines Day! | ||||
| 3:39am 02/14/2004 | ||||
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| This song is brought to you by.. | ||||
| ................. | ||||
| 12:49pm 02/13/2004 | ||||
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| This song is brought to you by.. | ||||
| ..And I find it kind of funny.. I find it kind of sad.. | ||||
| 10:30am 02/12/2004 | ||||
hmmm.. where to begin.. well unfortunately my relationship didnt work out. Is it a surprise to anyone? No of course not. I don't really want to talk about it.. it just didn't work out.. ok? end of story.. and moving on.... Well.. I still am employed by Shop Rite Supermarket.. however.. Scrunchy's Playhouse no longer exists. The supermarket was bought by a private owner and she decided that she didn't want Scrunchy's.. so she got rid of it and she put me in the pharmacy. I'm not complaining.. I love working in the pharmacy! It is great. So now instead of a childcare provider I am an assistant pharmacy technician. strange.. but kick ass.. The spring semester started and so far so good.. I am only taking four courses this time around, and oly one class requires observation time of 35 hours. So yea.. I'm taking it easy this semester so I can get myself back on track with things.. It actually works out fine for me because since I withdrew from my two English courses last semester and decided to graduate a semester late It helps me to spread out my classes a bit. I have two more courses that require the observation but I only took one this semester.. again to get my self back on track so as not to overwhelm myself while taking on all the other obstacles that are present in my homelife. I started my firts observation today. I'm again in Our Lady of Providence Regional School in Central Islip. It really is a nice school.. and I am really considering requesting to do my student teaching there next year. Woah.. next year I am student teaching?!?! It felt like it would never come.. and now its just right around the corner.. the beginning of my future.. Well I have a bit of homework to get done and I wanna get to bed early tonight cause I'm starting to feel slightly weird. I'm hoping its just allergies, but I dont know.. I'm fearin that it may be a sinus infection cause the whole right side of my face feels swollen. Well.. I'm just gonna hope for the best. Nighty night all! ;) **~And I find it kind of funny, I find it kind of sad, the dreams in which I'm dying are the best I ever had~** ~Gary Jules~ |
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| This song is brought to you by.. | ||||
| Woah.. | ||||
| 10:01am 01/12/2004 | ||||
My dad has been home for a while, and was able to celebrate Christmas with us. We had the most amazing Christmas ever.. I couldn't have dreamed of a more perfect Christmas to tell you the truth, and whats even better was bringing in the New Year with my family, dad included! That was truely the happiest of holidays for me. Dad is doing pretty good. He is walking on his own without the use of the wheelchair and cane. He has a limp, but that will improve with time, and as he practices walking more and more. He can't use his left arm at all yet, and we are worried he may not get the use of that hand back, but we are hopeful that he will gain some sort of feeling and movement in it. He is talking fine, and he's back to his old joking, pain in the butt self again, who likes to bust everyones chops. We missed that!!! ;) Oh, I am so happy that he is home and that he is going to be ok!!! Johnny Funk is one cool boyfriend. Its been pretty cool. It just get frustrated because he lives out in Selden and I can't see him everyday. I get to see him like once a week, and if I'm lucky I'll see him twice in one week.. woo hoo.. oh man its frustrating.. but we should be ok. Hes a sweet guy, and he is wonderful when it comes to my family and my friends, although he only met Jenn and Mike so far. Hes friends with Chris already so I don't have to worry about getting his approval. I have to say, I love life.. yea it has its downs, but I have come to realize that things could be so much worse off, and my life doesn't even come close to being a horrible thing. I have so many things to be thankful for and even more things to be hopeful for and I can face anything head on at this point and come out the shining victor. The most powerful movie of all time said it best and I quote.. 'Hate is baggage. Lifes too short to be pissed off all the time". So the best advice that I have to give at this point, after being through all that I have been through within the last two years and most importantly the last few months, is get over yourself, and get over that self pity.. all of that negitivity bullshit.. its just feeling like you arent good enough for the world.. and if that was the truth of things.. that you aren't good enough for the world.. then you wouldnt be here.. you werent put on this world to sit around and sulk about every little obstacle that life throws at you, or every little problem that you may feel you aren't strong enough to handle, because you really are strong enough to handle it. You are only thrown challenges that you are capable of overcoming. Life sucks sometimes.. but remember it could always be worse. Everything happens for a reason, and I always thought that stupid saying was the biggest load of crap that I had ever heard in my life.. but I never realized how true it is, as I do now. And if all else fails.. when life gives you lemons, squeeze the juice into a water gun and squirt it into other peoples eyes! ;) I am gonna go for now. Probably gonna finish up a movie and then drift off to sleep. I have a million and one things to accomplish tomorrow, and I want to see Johnny tomorrow night as well.. so goodnight everyone.. and sweet dreams! **~Hate is baggage. Lifes too short to be pissed off all the time~** ~American History X~ |
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| This song is brought to you by.. | ||||
hopeful| Cruise Control.. | ||||
| 10:50am 12/17/2003 | ||||
Well the semester is officially over!!! Yay! No school or school work until January 22nd.. thats pretty damn sweeet! I plan to get my ass in gear and into good shape for the up coming semester because I want to do such a kick ass job. I kinda need to after this semester going downhill. I'll do it though.. I have the confidence, so I know I can do it.. woah.. me having confidence in myself?! Thats a crazy concept. Oh well.. what can you do. I've been workin like a mofo lately, but I love it. Tomorrow morning I am going back to the preschool that I observed in this semester because the children are putting on a show, and Christmas Sing-a-long.. its gonna be so freakin adoreable. I'm done with all of my Christmas shopping.. well almost.. I just wanna double check with Chris to make sure my idea for Johnny is a good one.. I think its a pretty good idea, and actually Karen came up with it for me, so hopefully that works out. I just have to check a few things with Chris, and see if he knows where the best place to go is.. I wont mention it here in case Johnny reads this before Christmas. I got to see both Johnny and Chris last night which was cool.. I went out to go Christmas shopping with Johnny, and we stopped by Chris' place.. he was a sickly boy last night.. aww.. My dad is doing better and better everyday, now hes just starting to drive us crazy because hes been stuck in the house all day everyday and hes getting bored as hell.. Oh well.. I think that it is time for me to depart and go to sleep because I am exhausted.. goodnight everyone! **~words unsung hold me close don't let the wind follow don't let the wind take us away cassio... ~** ~Coheed and Cambria~ |
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| This song is brought to you by.. | ||||
| Hopless Romantic.. | ||||
| 12:00pm 12/12/2003 | ||||
Well my night ended with an amazing phone call from my awesome boyfriend, and he just made my shitty day so much better.. so now I can go to bed with a clear head and have some pleasant dreams.. so I will bid you a farewell for now, so Goodnight everyone and sweet dreams to all! **~This place was never the same again, After you came and went, How can you say you meant anything different, To anyone standing alone, On the street with a cigarette, On the first night we met. Look to the past, And remember a smile. And maybe tonight, I can breathe for awhile. I'm not in the seat, I think I'm fallin' asleep, But then all that it means is, I'll always be dreaming of you~**<3 ~Blink 182~ |
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| This song is brought to you by.. | ||||
| Silver and Cold.. | ||||
| 7:40am 12/06/2003 | ||||
**~You whispered so softly Then smiled at me from across the room I'm shy and you're real scared But we were talking soon ~** ~the Amazing Transparent Man~ |
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| This song is brought to you by.. | ||||
| Death of Seasons.. | ||||
| 8:38am 12/05/2003 | ||||
We'll they claim a big snowstorm is headed our way tomorrow.. its crazy.. its too soon for snow in my opinion. It just got way too cold way to fast. The official first day of winter is not for another two weeks.. but it looks like winters here a little too soon. Well.. i'm freezing.. so I am going to go make myself some steaming hot cocoa and cuddle up under my five big blankets and drift off to sleep with pleasant dreams.. so goodnight to you all and may you all also have some pleasant dreams! ;) **~A star up in the sky goes slowly passing by, The lights below...they spell out your name. You're comfort on my mind and you're with me all the time. And lot's of feeling that I can't explain. ~**<3 ~the Ataris~ |
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| This song is brought to you by.. | ||||
| you spin around me like a dream.. | ||||
| 10:32am 12/03/2003 | ||||
My observational lesson plan went so kick ass and I had an awesome assessment tool thanks to my mommy helping me out. Things have been really good lately. For those of you who dont know.. Johnny and I are now a couple.. yay.. that totally kicks ass. Thanks a bunch Chris. Disappointed cause I missed his call tonight.. but I will talk to him tomorrow.. its all good. I really need to get a new cellphone going. The semester is just about over and i dont know what the end result will be.. however I only have this week left to make sure everything is good to go. It looks like dad is coming home from the hospital on Thurday which is obviously awesome news. I devised a plan with Karen, Meaghan and John that while mom is out this weekend doing all the final hosptial crap we are going to do all of the Christmas preparations and decorating.. this way it is one less thing for her to worry about.. but thats going to be funny.. me trying to get a Christmas Tree home on my tiny stupid little car. Speaking of car.. i hate it.. end of story. It died again on me last night.. after we just got the engine put in. I didnt know what to do because I was stuck out in centereach at 1:30am.. but Johnny had everything under control so I eventually made it home.. Thank you!!!.. but I'm stuck with no car yet again.. so i'll be walking to the repair shop to pick up my car in the freezing cold.. Oh well.. what are ya gonna do.. shit happens.. you just gotta deal.. which is what I'm doing. so anyway.. I'm pretty tired and I have to finish up a 5-7page paper on Bach for my MUS203 class.. which I only so far have two and a half pages.. but hey its a start.. so I will say goodnight to you all and have pleasant dreams.. I know I will ;) **~I'm here without you baby but your still on my lonely mind. I think about you baby and I dream about you all the time. I'm here without you baby but your still with in my dreams and tonight it's only you and me~** ~3 Doors Down~ |
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| This song is brought to you by.. | ||||
| Thanksgiving.. | ||||
| 11:53pm 11/27/2003 | ||||
~Turkey for the girls and Turkey for the boys. My favorite kind of pants Are corduroys. Gobble gobble goo and Gobble gobble gickel. I wish turkey Only cost a nickel. Oh I love turkey on Thanksgiving. Happy Thanksgiving everybody! ~Adam Sandler~ |
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| This song is brought to you by.. | ||||
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tinylilangel03 |
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Friends Info Calendar |
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