Wednesday, December 23rd, 2009
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04.43 am :: because some of the rest of most of you just aren't special enough, hmp. (19.09.2006)
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Monday, November 9th, 2009
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01.56 am :: Sa pagsali ko sa UPM, aking natutunan...
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... ang paggamit ng drybag imbis na handbag.  ... ang UMAURA AURA AURA LANG, FOREVER!, despite the elements. (Encapsulated in the philosophy: High Altitude, High Fashion.) Kahit na pa mukhang TINGA lang ang iba. Dahil ansaya sayang maging bakla sa bundok!      (Pero ang downfall ng pilosopiyang ito: Daig ng CHUMICHEVER ang puro AURA lang. Kumbaga sa fightnight: Cancer of the Bangs vs. Ngawit Panga Syndrome. Sorry! Sorry na self!) ... i-maintain ang Sang're appeal, kahit pawisan. (Well, ito inborn skill na. Di ko man na-pick up sa UPM, dun ko naman na-showcase.)   ... ang uminom. Actually, di rin impluwensya ng UPM ito, per se. Sirkumstansya lang talaga.     ... na it's UP(M) or NOTHING! (Ahahahaha, pero sali tayo sa beach+climb nila Kenneth Happy Campers sa December.) ... na MAS masaya parin umakyat ng may crush/semi-secret labteam. (Sorry, pero slight misleading ang foto.)   Pero pero pero! Ansabe nga ni Prop DV at Fetusboy: Bawal mainlab!
... kaya dapat nakikinig sa mga advice ng mga friends/MATATANDA, kahit ma mukhang Fetus pa sila.   And finally, aking natutunan at na-reaffirm ng bonggang bongga: Masama ang pamamangka sa dalawang ilog. Pero ang masahol pa dito ay pamamangka sa kabundukan. Dahil ang kabundukan ay inaakyat at hindi sinasagwan! (And vice versa.) In short: Bawal talipandas ok. [ No photosample for this one, hehe. ]Pero mas importante pa dun, aking natutunan: How to make new friends, ahlaveit!     
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Friday, November 6th, 2009
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03.07 am :: "So that whole time was like this sad memory for you?"
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Wednesday, November 4th, 2009
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10.05 pm :: Wigged out
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And while we're on the subject of gaying people up & out...
I'm sorry but I never meant for something like this to happen!The Frenchlings were at Trinomee weeks ago, trying on wigs. Out of their own volition/whimsy! And the girls actually bought some and have promptly used them. I <3 these kids. swear! Another friend (an ex-officemate) has also been converted. One night, she took her precious wig out for a testdrive and broke up with her boyf wearing one, a.k.a. napanuod ko na yon pero hindi sa pelikula! (More like drama anthology.) Full battle gear, baby! She tells me (days after, via SMS) that while it was happening, all she could think of was my own episode and how the wig made it silly and empowering at the same time, even going as far as canonizing me as patron saint of faux coif. And to that I say, Ako'y payak (bagaman balingkinitang) bakla po lamang, simple ang mga pangarap. Natutuwa naman ako na kahit papaano'y naging parte ako ng iyong buhay at ng inyong desisyon lubusang magpakabakla.I thank you. Bow.
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Tuesday, November 3rd, 2009
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11.52 pm :: Isang... Epiphany! (Na meshadong mahaba para maging comment lang!)
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OJM* mga bakla!
Kung sya si Edvard Cullen...
at si 8Mins** ay si Jacob...
then OJM part 2!
I'm like soooooooooooooooo Bella!
(Ang brilliant ko lang today, ahjazlaveit!)
( fan art swiped from southernm!dn!ghtsun )
Dahil YES, dapat current tayo sa mga pop references. Kahit euwww. Dahil ang kabataan ang syang pag-asa ng bayan.
Shet, kailangan nito ng matinding celeb photo mashup.
_______________________________
* OJM = Ojusme!
** Yep, that's his official title now.
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Monday, October 26th, 2009
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07.50 pm :: Wishlist 09!
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- The Winchester Austen (the ones that look like Moleskine notebooks) or
The Pride & Prejudice Penguin Classics Deluxe Edition
 
It's the cover(s) I'm after. Available at Fully-Booked and all the other ususal places, I suppose. But call them up first coz that's smarter.
- Statement tees!
 
'MAKE LOVE NOT BABIES' by Collezione. Yellow, please!
- Fancyhats! Fascinators!
Hats from http://hatmomma.com/.
Tapos amazingly, meron din sa SM Deptarment Store kasi apparently they've got it all talaga. Sa Women's at sa Girls' Acessories, san pa! (Mas cute yung sa Girls'.)
( but wait, there's more )
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Friday, October 16th, 2009
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02.08 pm :: Glad to have you back, baby.
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And yes, this calls for a bitty celebration.
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Sunday, October 4th, 2009
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10.54 am :: Not herd.
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"So. Are you still joining?"
"I don't think so. I'm having problems with the org."
"Like how?"
"Well, y'know."
" ... "
"Morally."
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Friday, September 25th, 2009
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12.36 pm :: Shhh.
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Tonight, it's been decided:
( ... )
Thanks to everyone who cared and listened
and indulged in the crazy and looked out for me.
Love my lovely friends <3 ! Always.
But let's be done with all the silliness and move on!
(I'm excit'ish!)
c: ,
TeamCarmi
(↑ wacky ↑)
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Wednesday, September 9th, 2009
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10.52 am :: Ang sarap isipin na may mga taong masasabi mong mamahalin mo habambuhay...
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Wednesday, August 26th, 2009
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08.32 pm :: B/W Photography: Lines
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Pero hindi talaga. Yun lang yung criterion for our midterm plate for Film 110. Eh sayang naman ang 36 shots kung uubusin ko lang sa lines.  ( At nakapag-reprint na ako, SAWAKAS! ) |
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Friday, July 31st, 2009
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12.41 pm :: The (New) FrenchKids: An Introduction
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Meet the Frenchkids!
They're too cute! - Nagpipictorial sila dahil... wala lang!
- May konteksto sila mag-pose!
- Gumagamit sila ng props!
- Mabilis silang mag-upload!
How could I resist? Tapos pinatawad ko narin ang occasional "ate" incidents kasi nga naman 10 years ang gap. Their mothers raised them well eh. Tapos keri na na mahilig sila mag-wacky. Within a certain age range cute pa umarti ng genon, I suppose. |
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Friday, July 24th, 2009
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01.07 pm :: Seriously, 202.92.128.30!
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Stalking can be cute. It's like three of my Top Ten Favorite Hobbies, Work-out Regimens, and Life-Choices of all time. (Three for EACH category, mind you.) But people, when will you learn to leave a comment? (Hatemail. Libel suit. A song. Declaration of luuurve. Marriage proposal. Whatever, buddy.) ( Or if not that, at least make attempts at covering your tracks. ) It's rather unattractive. |
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Monday, July 20th, 2009
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08.01 pm :: (An open letter to SPG)
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Dear Stephen Patrick Gately, Sorry to disappoint but I'm done looking. Your former co-torchbearer, J. |
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Tuesday, July 7th, 2009
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11.49 am :: Single, female, 26
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Unedited.
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Monday, June 15th, 2009
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12.50 pm :: And this is Georgiegeorgie...
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Monday, May 18th, 2009
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06.49 am :: Meet Georgie
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My old new camera. (New old camera?)
Bought him off my brother, I-chan Moneybags (who's been looking for an excuse to upgrade, god bless his ma-ma-materialistic soul), as soon I got the check for my tax refund?/de minimis?/13th month? from the office.
Georgie shall be my escort until such time that a proper Photographer-Mowdel-Boyfriend relieves him from his post.
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Monday, May 11th, 2009
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06.35 am :: Hint:
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Sunday, February 22nd, 2009
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11.39 pm :: The ghost of words, or How to write a (non)love letter
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It was at a local bus stop where she found him; not really waiting for the bus or anything at all, but still, just there: waiting.
She was fixing her gaze at him but was distracted by the cold, how he looked cold; to her much like a mislaid coat, with pockets outturned.
Headed home, she asks. A cursory glance is all the answer he offers.
He, too, was distracted by the cold, how it's upon us all of a sudden, everywhere. Cold is an almost foreign concept, where he was from.
Home, he begins to say, is sixteen hours away. But his breath forms smoke like the ghost of his words, and these do not reach her.
Home is a far along way from here, she hears him, barely. Just as he was opening his mouth again, the bus rolls by and she disappears onto one of the seats at the back.
She wanted to talk to him about summer and the shortcomings of the sun and how everyone's headed home, eventually, but she's bound elsewhere. She moves to the glass that now separates them, like datelines and globe hemispheres, and with vapour trails traces for him maps and awkward heart-shapes and wishes of warmer days.
Home is a far along way from here and he almost tells her. But just as soon, he stops the saying of things and becomes the waiting again.
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Sunday, February 15th, 2009
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12.31 pm :: Dahil hindi krimen ang maging choosy!
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VDay 09. I didn't want to be assaulted by throngs of sappy-happy couples (hellllo, Sta Mesa Manila!) and I didn't want to be Miss Girly Angst Brigade four years in a row either. So whadda I do, where do I go? Divisoria of course! Coz nobody goes there for dates, right? Except... uhm... Unis. (Ahahhaha, ateh sorry naman.) In the midst of retail therapy, I found these non-standard wanted postings. (There were lots!)  Napa- 'GO GURL!' ako ng di oras. I wish I had these ladies' badassitude. Because choosiness is a RIGHT, not a privilege! |
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Wednesday, August 6th, 2008
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03.05 pm :: c: / :c
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I'm beginning to think that maybe I'm not built for happiness, or unexpected kindness, or any sort of softness that comes from the heart. What could be the point, then? Coz I'm all drawn-out and I just want to rest on something home.
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Sunday, June 15th, 2008
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10.55 pm :: White flag
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It wasn't strictly a siege. Or anyways who could be bothered with putting up any sort of resistance against it, had there been one. The surrender was offered, never exacted, with mercenary smilies committing the highest of treasons. Fast-forward to NOW: when my phone's switched to silent and I carry on pretending to no longer be waiting on it.
any...
minute...
now...
... or now.
How about now. NO?
Coz now's still good.  And this is what happens after too many Tudor episodes. Damn you, Ann Boylen and your self-undoing corsets! |
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Friday, February 22nd, 2008
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03.36 pm :: Love affair with audio cassette
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Forgetting could be awesome sometimes like on a random day, you stumble upon some cool shit you were absolutely nuts about a while back but eventually forgot, and now it's dusted itself off and somehow managed to find you again and you're like ohmigod! ohmigod! ohmigod! like you can't believe and it's this intense reunion and falling in love twice over.
current music: headstate: Sticking with you - The Velvet Underground (Juno OST)
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Monday, January 14th, 2008
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12.39 pm :: 1st Asian Tour: Path to Boy
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I was certain that the first time I'd tour Asia, it would be a Wong Kar Wai retrospective: burying secrets in Angkor Wat, running all over HK or Macau after five million cheongsam changes, perfectly putting on blood red lipstick only to be smeared off by a mystery boy in Singapura.
But nerr.
Asian tour '08 is clearly Path to Boy. (Unfortunately, not my boy.)
May 14-29, Singapura - Malaysia - Thailand(?), with head huntress Charlikins.
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Monday, December 17th, 2007
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08.40 am :: This plain housewifery thing
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... ain't fun one bit.
I'm almost tempted to let them starve just to get a point across. (Never works, btw, coz there's always salvation in Ginisa Flavor Mix.)
I completely understand Mother now. Nagging is love on a loop. On a loop. On a loop.
current music: headstate: clumsy - fergie
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Saturday, December 1st, 2007
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08.12 am :: year-end target: someone who'd love me, false eyelashes and all (na STRAIGHT, pls god, pls.)
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Friday, November 30th, 2007
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12.12 pm :: carfuw
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and single, consuming thought was,
"papaano na ang ministop?"
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Wednesday, November 28th, 2007
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07.53 pm :: this week, in dvds:
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Thursday, October 18th, 2007
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05.12 am :: parlour game: exchange boypren
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a nasty little game of musical chairs (version: your boypren) is making its way into my once-immaculate social calendar. with forces much stronger than i am, i've resigned to the fact that:- he, who is a he, prefers him, who is a himgolf is code for "man-date"
- it's october; it's inevitable
which i understand, but...
how come i get the
carless,
pobre
one
in this exchange?... waahh. somebody, anybody, please come to my rescue. here's a stalker-friendly rundown of next week. consider this a personal invitation. it'll be awkward, i promise. ( no, seriously. )
current music: headstate: short-changed
current music: headstate: as lovers go - dashboard confessional
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Monday, October 15th, 2007
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10.55 pm :: pelicula 07: the compensatory return
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in the grand celebration of freedom and bitterness (because those two go oh-so beautifully together, donchathink?) i've dedicated three full days of last week to pelicula '07: the 6th spanish film festival. five of the seven screenings i went to, i went to alooone--two of which were even LFSes (last full shows, baby), which is kind of sad & mad & very tragic spinster-found-dead-by-her-cats-three-days-after, but at the same time stays true to the overall sentiment. 
( ... )
current music: headstate: compensating
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Thursday, October 11th, 2007
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10.29 am :: sarah, ang munting prinsesa
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my folks just got thru the consul interview.
it's official.
i'll soon be a princess sarah
(that makes charlie... ermingard?)
current music: headstate: sad (meep!)
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Monday, August 6th, 2007
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05.54 pm :: unleash the inner drag queen
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 false eyelashes is the absolute next level--so i come to work, a different pair each day like it's the most natural thing.  ( ... ) |
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Thursday, July 19th, 2007
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04.06 pm :: dapat ata nag-iinvest din sa mga friends at hindi puro nalang bathing suits. / end lesson
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( ... )going hermit crab = not most brilliant travel strategy, especially when: 1) expenses will be split three ways and 2) decisions are called by the majority and they easily out-vote me, two:one. there ought to be a skinny on the cdo - camiguin trip somewhere here, but i'm straining my neck trying to write it up as ouchless as possible.  soon, comrades.
current music: headstate: out of order
current music: headstate: maybe - up dharma down
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Wednesday, July 11th, 2007
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05.24 pm :: i take time to warm up.
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why does everyone keep missing that?
i love forever&ever for always so what's the rush,
and where to, exactly?
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Tuesday, July 10th, 2007
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07.26 am :: can't have your cake and eat it too when you're wannarexic.
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these days, i'm so zen it's not even funny. i am also celine freakin'dion singing 'all by myself (don't wanna live)' to an audience of exactly zero, which could be funny but isn't the point.  ( THE POINT IS... )it's seven full hours of sleep and not needing to rock myself first. it's accidental babies by damien rice without the thought of a personal dedication. it's forgetting. in all five dimensions. it's reading about her and my pigeonheart not breaking. it's not feeling the need to read you write about her at all. but it's also switching off.
it's impatience.
it's days and weeks folding into each other, indistinct.
it's finding nothing and eventually not even looking anymore.
it's july rain, it's skin and song stripped of meaning.
it's static taken for silence.
current music: headstate:  sleepy
current music: headstate: silence is easy - starsailor
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Saturday, July 7th, 2007
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09.42 am :: aquasocks in aquablue with heart detail = serious emotional investment
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the so-called "wanderlust buddies" are a bunch of soggy serial flakes.
taker-for-granters of the five-paged itinerary, which, unbefuckingknownst to them, was borne of purelove. anal tendencies. whatever.
you.. you... YOU TOURISTS, YOU!
current music: headstate:  disappointed
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Monday, June 25th, 2007
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05.11 pm :: so i'll stop. (or at least, you won't be hearing any more of it.)
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back to seven hours of sleep, and here, you see, is the final connection.
i cut back on the meiji bars, spa sessions, retail therapy, so it doesn't feel like cheating. like maybe all of it's chemical.
but when is happiness ever not borderline chemical anyways?
synthetic, i mean. and maybe 'happiness' is the wrong word (oh!) to claim and wear around one's pretty little neck when wasn't it just five minutes ago we decided on heartbreak coz at least that, that'll stick for good. i'm sorry. in hindsight, i should've realized how this could be depressing (in a compare & contrast sort of way), but we really ought to stop doing that and you can hardly think it's personal. you shouldn't, is what i'm saying.
...
then, of course, the moment you realize it, claim it for your own, your lovely new pashmina's gone.
i hope the next time won't have to be a celebration in a lockbox. |
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Wednesday, June 20th, 2007
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07.33 am :: strawb'ries & bananas -do- mix.
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this is, i sincerely suspect, the happiest i've been (since, well...)
when did happiness become all and only about unguarded glances and lips & hands wet from always kiss kiss kissing and cellotaping hope onto the moment (any moment) just long enough until maybe it might actually mean something, anything, as if hearts-on-sleeves were a universal arts & crafts project. when did we start doing that? and why?
when the world can hold a whole lot more, and will for you if you knew how brave it is to ask nicely, a lot more than your put-on tragedies and awkward touches and blood thinning over pages of stale verse; you've always been so weightless, and we couldn't forget.
since learning to work my mouth again, and exhale when it's become impossible to take everything in.
-------------------------------------------
-------------------------------------------
current music: headstate: they do! they do!
current music: headstate: speeding cars - frou frou
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Friday, June 1st, 2007
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08.07 am :: caught twenty-two
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Monday, May 21st, 2007
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11.57 pm :: it'll be six months since by june.
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guess who rekindled things (or is it just kindled- sans prefix, coz the last few times didn't really count?), sounding scandalously s1ngle despite friendster status?
ok, that doesn't narrow it down to anything.
but vague insinuations of region one cohabitation were flinged around with such torturous ease (and snatched, posthaste), i could be imelda marcos. or is it more aptly gabriela silang?
current music: headstate: right on cue
current music: headstate: one more night - apostle of hustle
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Saturday, March 10th, 2007
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02.18 pm :: there's no place like home, there's no place like home, there's no place...
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"meet me... at the kanto."
been here a week but everything else that isn't soiled denims or canned food or toothbrushes had thoughtlessly been left to sit inside boxes marked "HANDLE WITH CARE <3" (although, after the battle with unending rolls of packing tape, we start to mean it less and less).
no one has even bothered with the new address. like bunched up underpants, something wrong you'd need to get used to eventually. yesterday, i got locked out because i was carrying around my old keys. we could try but we may have elected, preconsciously, to fight feelings of settling in.
current music: headstate: homesick
current music: headstate: when it's over we still have to clear up - snow patrol
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Friday, February 23rd, 2007
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06.50 am :: this little disappearing act
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bit by crummy bit, their turgid hearts are beginning to show weakness. they are on their way to missing me! which wasn't part of the plan, pulling away from the familiar; there was never even a plan. ... two months AWOL, mister consistency-is-key turned up again on my metaphorical doorstep, exactly one hundred fifty-three hours, gmt +800. and , despite the tiny schoolgirlish *squeeeeee!* i let out at this invite, i really have lost all compounded biannual interest. go find some other crowbar, lover.
current music: headstate: sleepy
current music: headstate: i get along without you very well - nina simone
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Saturday, February 17th, 2007
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10.15 am :: it ain't over til feb 15.
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Saturday, February 10th, 2007
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03.09 pm :: speaking in parables
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Monday, January 8th, 2007
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12.14 pm :: fare me well!
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waking up to cat lint and the stale, dry taste of oh, look, you! what a way to say goodbye by making that couch again and lying in it. you see, he knows he's not
just remembering this dance
he's there
in both moments
simultaneously.  just then, it's obvious: time's a lie.
current music: headstate:  relieved
current music: headstate: stupid memory - sondre lerch
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Sunday, January 7th, 2007
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11.34 pm :: very demi.
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some somethings are better than some nothings but very rarely when that something has the nature of, say, pedophilia.
this is totally charlikin-territory (welcome to the wilderness!): five foot ten inches of tall, lanky, unadulterated catholic-flavored goodness. the small of my back rendered h.e.l.p.less.
h is for hurry...
e is for urgent...
l is for love me...
PLEEEASE!
current music: headstate:  curious
current music: headstate: do what you want - okgo
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Wednesday, January 3rd, 2007
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04.26 am :: red-lettered
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Monday, January 1st, 2007
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01.39 am :: back in god's good graces, i s'ppose.
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some people want it all
but i want no--nothin' at all
if i ain't got you baby... but then again, some people have universally certified gay men for their hot new boyfriends making it harder to officially complain. things like this feel so hand-of-god ish, invoking more than the usual schadenfreude point-and-snicker fit. it's as if a certain balance in my world has been restored; a sense of hope, renewed. ... coz if there's something to learn from 2006, it's that divine providence doesn't take to whinyness too well.
current music: headstate:  cheerful
current music: headstate: if i ain't got you - athlete (alicia keys cover)
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Friday, December 29th, 2006
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01.30 am :: regular operating hours
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the slightest sound rouses me to movement. life's on permanent date stand-by. centuries of fine tuning the mating rituals of our species and they still ask you out for 2pm on a monday, or early christmas morn. ask you out or over.
i could become a rules girl, lil miss never-after-a-wednesday. but when he's damn edible like that?
current music: headstate: on hold
current music: headstate: smile like you mean it (the killers cover) - david gray
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Monday, December 25th, 2006
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09.54 am :: constipated with happiness and helpless against your su'thern charms as a matter of course.
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(you, the waldorf salad, our lovely biannual affair.
i'm running purely on warmfuzzies at this point.)
♥ ♥ ♥
wonderful christmas morn, everyone!
current music: headstate:  high
current music: headstate: i'm glad i hitched my apple wagon - the boy least likely to
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cold
anxious