THEW40

6:50pm: Columbus Misadventures
Danny P, having a job interview in Columbus, asked me to come along. "All expenses paid!" he had declared. With Tricia's a-okay, I agreed to this journey to the heart of the heart of America. We left my place around 9:30, went north, and then south, listening to "This American Life" . . . until we hit hyperspace somewhere around Ashland.

Shortly thereafter, I had to pee. Our only option was an Econo Lodge in The Middle of Nowhere, Ohio. The Econo Lodge was on top of a hill behind an abandoned building/parking lot. We swung around the front of the hotel, I leapt out, bladder filled to its brim (nice, eh?) . . . only to spot the sign reading "Absolutely No Public Restrooms." We leapt back into the car, then pulled into abandoned parking lot after Dan realized "we're both men." We got out. He pissed in some bushes while I did my business on a rail. Awesome!

After that, we were off and arrived in Columbus a little while longer. We checked in (which was not nearly as "scanadalous" as I thought it would be), then went up to the room. The ONE bed room. Now, look, I'm a very open minded guy. I have gay friends, and I support gay rights. But for some strange reason, the idea of sleeping in the same bed with another dude . . . I don't know, triggered some sort of primal sense of discomfort. Stupid, I know.

So we put up a barrier of pillows just in case we became instantly horny gay guys who are easily discouraged.

(note tonuge-in-cheek)

After a visit to the Pavilion Pantry and some Adult Swim/Lettermen, it was bedtime.

The next morning, Dan left for the interview. He appropiately psyched himself up with various speeches and then left. Hungry, I wandered down to the breakfast bar, where I was tempted to charge it to the room, then decided against it and thus paid in cash. The last of my cash, I should point out. After eatting, I went back up the room, hung around, double and triplied checked everything, then hung out in the lobby for Dan to return.

I had him talked into going to Buckeye Doughnuts because last time I was there, it completely and totally fantastically awesome. After navigating through all this mess, we got there and I was stunned by the lack of variety. Where were the apple fritters and the cream sticks and bavarian filled doughnuts of three years ago? Baffled, I ordered only a buttermilk and was forced to debit it . . . only to discover that there's a $1 limit to charge it. Dan paid (after chosing his) and then proceeded to rant about this misguided trip to Buckeye Doughnuts. As I told him, "it wouldn't be a Woodside-venture without you getting a little pissed off at me."

The trip home was filled with Dan ranting and music. God, did he rant. Sometime around when he brought up "John Summit," we realized we screwed something up. I-76 was nonexistent. We hopped off, took an alternate route, then returned to North Canton/Akron eventually.


~W~

6:52pm: Beginnings and Endings
I applied for the job with Public Storage a week ago; it was one among 13 others. It was, in fact, my "lucky 13." On Monday afternoon, I called and finagled my way into talking to the recruiting agent. She took my call, had apparently just seen my resume (and had me on "the list"), and set me up for an interview on Wednesday. Needless to say, this was the topic of conversation on the way to Columbus.

Wednesday arrive, I got dressed up in my suit, and drove up to Cleveland. My actual workplace is going to be in Akron, but the District Manager was up there for the day, hence the meeting. Obeying the rules I had learned in CAPTURING VERBAL INFORMATION (from those days I didn't skip class, that is), I arrived ten minutes early. Which worked out, because the interviewee before me didn't show up.

So the DM and I talked for a while, him asking me various questions. I was concerned because I had to keep referring to Acme and whatnot, but that's all I really had. Turns out that worked in my favor. After some back and forth and interviewing me thoroughly, he stated "well, I've got another interview after you, but I don't want to drive [back to Michigan] and then have to drive back. I'd like to get this all done today. Why don't you hang out at that Target next door or get something to eat and I'll call you in half an hour, 45 minutes?"

Duh, I said yes. I left for Target, shaking and spazzing. Was this really happening? Was I really that close to getting this job? Not wanting to jinx it, I didn't call anyone. Instead, I stopped at the Starbucks within Target, got something to drink, and felt like a super-dork walking around Target drinking Starbucks in a suit (and looking at toys -- I was bored).

After what seemed like the 10th time walking around Target, he called and had me come right over. I walked in and he shook my hand and offered me a loud "CONGRATS!" To which a lady paying at the counter rudely replied "What are you congradulating him for?"

We went to the backroom, signed some various forms, and had the job twenty minutes later. He had said then that in addition to really liking my answers, what sold him on me was all my time at Acme. Score! On my way out, we chatted about the job. I get to grow my beard!

I headed home, stopping once for pee, gas, and a congrats candy bar. I wanted to tell someone, but wanted to wait to tell Tricia in person. I called Dan, he was in the library and thus couldn't answer. So I kept it to myself.

I came home and hugged my wife.

"So how'd it go?" she asked.

"Well, honey, let me put it this way . . . I need to go downstairs then go over to my Dad's to do some printing." She started to say "why" but I cut in. "Because I got the job and I need to give Acme my two weeks notice."

***

Of course, I up-dated Facebook. I called Smitty, Steph, Travis, Mom, Eric, Dad, and Janine. I then wrote my notice, ran over to my Dad's and printed it out over there (I have zero ink here and zero money to buy ink). Then, taking my old route to work, I went to . . . well, work. Which was very surreal.

I got there, shaking and feeling strange. Was I really going to do this? Am I really doing this? I asked Staci who was there, she said "Bob," and then got excited for me. I walked over to the edge of the counter, unable to go any further. John walked over (my hier) and I told him all about it, almost throwing up in the process. Yeah.

I took to the plunge. Bob looked up at me. "What's up, Kev?"

"This." I handed him two copies of my notice, one for him and one for Greg. I was freaking wreck inside. He asked me a few questions about the new job, asked how long I'd been there, asked if I could take Pam with me, etc. I then left and had tears in my eyes as I drove home. I called Pam and broke the bad news.

I had my drug test Thursday, which was a misadventure in it of itself. But let's spare that story.

The past two days have been very odd, Acme-wise. I can't help but just be so happy. It's just the fact that I'll no longer have to deal with this bullcrap. One last holiday, one last week, then it's done and over with.

Today I said good bye to Sharon and Jess. Sharon wasn't too bad simply because's been a pain for the past few months. Jess was a little harder. I nearly cried when I said good bye to her.

There will be more on Acme next week, as things start to wind down and I let out that sentimentail wuss that's hiding inside me.

~W~