jules' Blurty Entries [entries|friends|calendar]
jules

[ userinfo | blurty userinfo ]
[ calendar | blurty calendar ]

[13 Mar 2003|05:23pm]
[ mood | gloomy ]
[ music | airports *soco ]

yet again another day to prove my rollercoaster theory.

THINGS BLOW.

1 comment|post comment

[09 Mar 2003|03:15pm]
wellll this is my last time writin in this journal i hav a new one ... u can ask me if u want it. i most likely wont tell u it mite not even be on blurty sooo l8er.
1 comment|post comment

[08 Mar 2003|11:29pm]
everyone has changed in bad ways n im not gonna be a part of it anymor.
my dads coming to get me even tho its 1130 and im scared out of my mind ... he does crazy things when hes pissed and the roads are really dangerous im so scared u have no idea im bawling ... but its not like u would care rite? i wish i had a lizzie mcguire life ... my biggest problem being weather or not i win best dressed award. sheesh. too bad my familys fucked in ways no1 will ever kno.
i miss jason too much :o(
i miss people being real :o(

dads here uh oh
2 comments|post comment

[08 Mar 2003|05:54pm]
[ mood | busy ]
[ music | actions speak louder than words *tick tick BOOM ]

sooo busy. play prac. ea prac. working out. band prac. blablabla! shoooooo shleepy! well i must go ... always on the go. wanna kno what i hate tho. FAKERS. ive got a lot of those these dayss ohh well what can ya do?? NOTHING CAUSE I GOTTA GO IM GONA B LATE. cya

--

post comment

[07 Mar 2003|04:31pm]
[ mood | flirty ]
[ music | NC* ]

todayy this really cool senior who i totally admire named sean (he also plays guitar sings piano everythin u name it) hes in my keyboarding class n at lunch today he was like "i jus wanted to tell u that i think youre just really cool youre such an individual it totally rocks!" and i gave him some weird high five fist pound thing and said thanks!! youu to! and i jus gotta say that really made my day ...

its the lil things that make mee smile**

1 comment|post comment

[07 Mar 2003|04:10pm]
[ mood | calm ]
[ music | covered in rain *john mayer ]

for some reason i just really mor than anything want jason to come on. i dunno why... it jus feels like hes the only one i wanna talk to the only one whose gona make me laff n smile! i hopee he comes on before i go to damn ea. hes so awesomme**

youre the brightest thing i got*

1 comment|post comment

[07 Mar 2003|03:54pm]
[ mood | content ]
[ music | moshi moshi *brand new ]

jasons way too cool :o) wow....*****

post comment

i love him on my own [06 Mar 2003|07:50pm]
[ mood | content ]
[ music | landslide *fleetwood mac ]

pep rally. great! musical. great! overall okay day. i saw jordan for the first time in 2 weeks... ohh boy. seeing him just brings back all these weird feelings. love. hate. jealousy. anger. saddness. you name it ive felt it towards him.

so yea he drove me home from pep rally it was just like the good ol days before he got too cool. but he didnt seem too cool in the car. it was jus me n him kermit n ms.piggy jus like always. i miss us :o( yeah he complimented me. which was a good sign. we said something to eachother without screaming. which is a good sign. he asked to hang out real soon n go shopping at salvation army n stuff. which is a good sign. but they only bad thing was when we were walking outside and i looked up and stopped and said make a wish... and closed my eyes and wished for the same thing ive wished for with every wish ive ever made since i was nine ... and he said why?? i looked up and said a star... and he said no thats an airplane i said no its a star he said oh yeah that blinking flashing star... but ya kno what who cares if it was a star or an airplane all that matters is if i believe in my dreams rite. im so glad were friends again... i hope this time he says what he means. why cant he just except the way i am. i learned something today ... life is sooooooooo much better when your DARING! seriously. thats what made today bearable. i just said want i wanted to did what i want. it was cool. rock on!

**

p.s- i loved jords cologne he used to where dolche and gabana ... and i wear hollister and he always said i smell good and then he went out and bought the same hollsiter as me (cause its unisex) hehe im so flattered!

1 comment|post comment

[05 Mar 2003|12:36pm]
[ mood | depressed ]
[ music | airports -something corporate ]

and ive taken 18 showers jus to pass the time.

1 comment|post comment

ohh seussical. [05 Mar 2003|11:45am]
[ mood | grumpy ]
[ music | alone in the universe *seussical ]

there are secrets on a leaf.. in the water.. in the air. hidden planets tiny worlds all invisible. not a person seems to know.. not a person seems to care. there is no one who believes a thing i say. well, i'm fairly certain at one time or other... great thinkers all feel this way. im alone in the universe. so alone in the universe. i found magic.. but they dont see it. they all call me a lunatic.. okay! call me a lunatic. if i stand on my own... so be it. cause i have wings yes i can fly around the moon and far beyond the sky. and one day soon i know there you'll be... one small voice in the universe.. one true friend in the universe. who believes in me... im alone in the universe. so alone in the universe. my own planets and stars are glowing. no one notices anything.. not one person is listening! they dont have any way of knowing... nobody knows that i have wings yes i can fly around the moon and far beyond the sky. well someday soon you will hear my plea... one small voice in the universe. one true friend in the universe. please believe in me. yes i have wings and i can fly. around the moon and far beyond the sky. you called my name and you set me free... one small voice in the universe. one true friend in the universe. who believes in me....*

1 comment|post comment

[05 Mar 2003|11:34am]
[ mood | irritated ]
[ music | broken hearts and concrete floors -dc ]

cause turning to you is like fallin in love when your ten...

1 comment|post comment

[05 Mar 2003|11:05am]
[ mood | depressed ]
[ music | brilliant dance --dashboard confessional ]

so this is odd. the painful realization that all has gone wrong. and nobody cares at all. nobody cares at all. so you buried all your lovers clothes and burned the letters lover wrote but it doesnt make it any better. does it make it any better? and the plaster dented from your fist in the hall where you had your first kiss reminds you that the memorys will fade. so this is strage.. our side stepping has come to be a brilliant dance where nobody leads at all... where no body leads at all. and the picture frames are facing down and the ringing from this empty sound is deafining and keeping you from sleep... and breathing is a foreign task. thinkings just to much to ask and your meausuring your minutes by a clock thats blinking eights. this is incredible, starving, insatiable, yes this is love for the first time. well you'de like to think that you were invincible yea well weren't we all once... before we felt loss for the first time. this is the last time. is this the last time? this is the last time.

--

1 comment|post comment

too cool now [05 Mar 2003|10:58am]
[ mood | cranky ]
[ music | lady in red --chris deburgh ]

snow day* uhh yeah?? i like the sleeping in part but im gona be bored off my ass the rest of the day. i thot about calling jord ... since i havent seen him since feb20th and seeing if he wanted to grab a bite to eat .... then i rememebered thats prolly not allowed. ya kno the whole us together in public mite not go over well with him. sooo here i sit. i'll prolly bee sittin herre all day :o) i have lost a couple pounds tho maybe once i loose 30 he wont mind being seen with me. no... maybe when i loose 30lbs and get my braces off. that mite work?? wow thats sad. WORD.

**

1 comment|post comment

no good. [04 Mar 2003|10:48pm]
[ mood | gloomy ]
[ music | swiss army romance- dashboard confessional ]

sleep with all the lites on your not so happi your not secure. n your dyin to look cute in your blu jeans but your plastic jus like everyone your jus like everyone. and that face you paint is pressed impressing most of us as permanent... id like to see you undone. college nite will draw the crowds, dorms unload n your heading out ... here is your moment to shine. making up a history thats nothing from the life you lead ... but man will they buy all your lies? sleep with all the sheets off baring your mattress baring your soul. and your dyin to look smooth with your tatoos but your searching jus like everyone it could be anyone. and those friends you hav are the best impressing most of us as permenant and id like to see you un-done. youth's the most unfaithful mistress. still we forge ahead to miss her. rushing our moment too shine. making up a history thats nothing from the life you lead but man will they buy all your lines? we're not twentyone. but the sooner we are the sooner the fun will begin so get out your fake eyelashes n fake i.d's n real disasters ensue. its cool to take these chances. its cool to fake romances. n grow up fast n grow up fast n grow up fast ... n grow up fast.

**errrr

1 comment|post comment

[04 Mar 2003|05:57pm]
[ mood | sad ]
[ music | happy endings *all american rejects ]

most of my time spent at school is time spent observing because in every class except for choir (which maddie n betsy r in) i have NIL FRIENDS. aquaintances perhaps ... but friends no. i dread group projects or when they say find a partner to work with. most of the time its better this way tho becuase the last thing i want is to try to fit in with people who wouldnt like me for me. thers no way in hell i would be anything but myself to impress someone ... so i'll just sit back relax and watch as the cool kids i go to school with argue about whose clothes costed mor ... puhlease.

--

1 comment|post comment

this is gona be the last time [03 Mar 2003|10:25pm]
[ music | rainy day song -juliana theory ]

alritey i have come to the conclusion that im tired of crying over myself. what a fuckin waste of time! and its stopping now. im tired of being upset because im too fat, or not tan enough, or just not perfect enuf. im being such a hypocrite. i mean no one can be totally satisfied with themselves you always have to test your limits but im putting myself down far too much. crying over myself will get me no wher ... thats y i started doing something about it. diet and exercize ... i mean dieting and exercizing will not change my big nose or braces but it'll make me feel better about myself! i never act like anything but the real me sometimes i just wish the world wasnt so based on looks so i wouldnt have to worrie bout this shit. buuut the world is like this and i do worry. so thats why im stopping all this hate myself bull shit -- it'll get me no wherr. a brand new start :-)

--

1 comment|post comment

you could be my heroine [03 Mar 2003|10:16pm]
[ mood | aggravated ]
[ music | forget december *soco ]

errr! why am i so UNLOVEABLE? its not fuckin fair!!!! i want someone too see past my horrifying looks and LOVE ME?? but will that ever in a million years happen? the harsh reality seems to be .... NO.
here are my options
1. Join A Convent
2. Become A Hermit

i think i'll go for the hermit.
geez i'll prolly fuck bein a hermit up too!!!

errrr.

1 comment|post comment

[03 Mar 2003|09:40pm]
[ mood | weird ]
[ music | pictures *kid rock n sheryl crow ]

poll of the week:
which is worse getting high or getting piss ass danger drunk?

--post what you think i heard some interesting view points this evening

**

post comment

[03 Mar 2003|08:28pm]
[ mood | calm ]
[ music | i stand for you *NC ]


thats rightt its mollie, nick carter, and me!! *woohoo

me and molliee freakin outt after we met him ... unforgettable.

us with nicks band --wayyy cool!

heres one of the opening acts VI3 they were uhhh ... good?



deffinatly a night to remember

post comment

[02 Mar 2003|09:53pm]
[ mood | hopeful ]
[ music | soco amaretto lime *brand new ]

"they're just jealous cause were young and in love..."

i wanna falll in lovee ... and be young ... and in love ... with someone who loves me as well :0(

**beilevin in someday

--

1 comment|post comment

navigation
[ viewing | most recent entries ]
[ go | earlier ]