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Sunday, July 13th, 2003

    Time Event
    1:34a
    i wish i weas dead :(

    Current Mood: blank
    8:12p
    lastnight was the worst night of my entire life,i got a call from my girl and she tells me she thinks we should just be friends, she says she isnt ready for a relationship, when she told me that i was shocked, it came out of nowhere we never got into a fight, we never even disagreed on anything, how could she do this. this was the first girl i stayed true to, i didnt care about any other girl, and anyone that knows me knows it is hard for me to stay with one girl, but one girl is all i wanted, when she told me i was just really pissed, she wasnt ready for a relationship, y didnt u say something before instead of stringing me along for over a month, i feel like i've been played like everything she said was a lie, she said she missed me, how can i believe her, she never returned my phone calls , shows how much she missed me,i loved this girl from the minute i talked to her y did she do this, i dont know, she wants to be friends, i cant, i cant stand to c her with another guy, i cant stand to be around her and not kiss her. how am i supposed to controll myself when i hear her voice, i am in love and nobody cares, plus lastnight more bad news, me and my bro got into a huge fight, i hate when we fight i hate screaming i hate when things dont go the way they should, right after i fight with my bro she calls me at 11 after i called her 9:30 and she tells me she isnt ready for a relationship,i swear god must fucking hate me, he must have a personal problem with me because when everything is going alright in my life he messes it up. i know i didnt make it easy for her, i was nervouse, i never fealt like i did when i was around her, i wanted everything to be special,so many things could have been for us, but i guess we will never know, i still ove her and i always will, i hope we can work things out and get back together. i hate my life i wish i was dead, i wish i would get a break one day, i wish god would help me out, i wish i didnt have to feel pain

    Current Mood: sad

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