| 4:07p |
Fartknocker
When did you meet the last male you texted?
I don't text.
Would you be surprised if your most recent ex called you tonight?
Like a mutherfucker.
This time last year, can you remember who you liked?
The same person.
Who was the last person you went out to eat with?
Maryann, Vanessa, Zachary, Marco, Jennifer and her new dude whose name escapes me at the moment.
Your phone is ringing. It's the person you fell hardest for. What do you say?
"How did you get this number?"
How are you feeling at this exact moment?
Slightly buzzed and smellin' the food cooking.
What is one thing that is currently bothering you?
The inconsistency in the weather.
Within the next 5 months, what are you looking forward to MOST?
Snowboarding.
Do you want to cut your hair?
Clippers, #2, on a regular basis...so I'm not concerned.
Would you rather have roommates or live alone?
Roommates were FUN because I could eat their cereal and bang their women when they passed out.
Will you be in a relationship next month?
My banger and I shall never part.
Has someone upset you in the past 48 hours?
No.
Do you get drunk every weekend?
No.
What makes you happy?
Good food with good friends, socializing over a weekend with like-minded people, endorphins, sunshine and green forests.
Do you think relationships are ever really worth it?
Grow old alone and try to ask that question again.
Is your profile private?
What fucking profile?
Connection between you and the last person who text messaged you?
**see answer #1
What are you doing right now?
Typing this shit.
Have you ever had a really big fight with a best friend?
Allllmost became physical.
What if you had a baby with the last person you kissed?
Incest is best.
How many cigarettes have you smoked today?
None.
Who were you last on the phone with?
Maryann.
When was the last time a member of the opposite sex hugged you?
About five minutes ago.
Are you happier single or in a relationship?
Both have their bright sides, but i'm more suited for relationships.
Do you think the last person you kissed cares for you?
Like you wouldn't believe.
What did you do today?
Errands, errands, errands....mixed with a little exercise and masturbation.
Have you ever kissed an ex after you broke up?
One of the best moments of my life.
Have you ever kissed anyone who's name started with a P or B?
Both.
What are you doing tomorrow?
Mowing, exercise, movies, and I don't know what else.
Have you kissed anyone in the last week?
Yes.
Do you think relationships are hard?
Do you think of anything else, Miss Questionnaire Writer?
Has anyone put their arms around you in the past 5 days?
Yes.
What was the last thing you did before you went to bed last night?
Listened to Jigga.
Last person you saw other than family?
Mabel.
Is there such thing as a perfect relationship?
Not for you, Miss Questionnaire Writer.
How did you feel when you woke up today?
Like killing that barking dog. |