| 10:17a |
My Beef
Ok, so I know I shouldn't bitch about the rain, but WHAT THE FUCK?!?! It has been bone ass dry up in this mutherfucker for MONTHS, bringing about severe water restrictions and poor river play. The park service and the state's department of transportation have had their fire safety notifications up all over the place. Around here all a person could be heard saying (especially from those in agriculture) is: "WE NEED RAIN!"
So here we are at day seven of the fucking DELUGE UP YO AZZ. Every fucking drop of precipitation that could have (and should have) fallen over the course of the hot season has been unloaded on my shit all at once. It never fails to play out like this after the hottest of South Texas Summers. High pressure systems will drop ass right on top of us, forcing out any approaching rain patterns until a strong cold air mass finally kicks it the fuck out the way. Unfortunately, due to the very nature of the season, this meteorological eviction won't occur until September/October. Well beyond the days when an occasional shower would be beneficial. The perfect scenario would feature an inch or two of rain dropped every couple of weeks. Alas, seeing a building fall over to crush the Sham-Wowee guy would be a more likely scenario seen than the blessing of bi-weekly rain showers.
In conclusion, I'd like to state that all the meateaters are to blame for this tragic and frustrating weather trend. If it weren't for all the fucking cow farts torching our precious atmosphere, there'd be a better heat shield in place to aid in keeping things cool. If it weren't for all those stinky, fat-assed cattle prancing around, waiting for their chance to drop onto some douchebag's dinner plate, there'd be less global warming. Fuck the meateaters. Fuck them in their gnarled, corn-holed asses! |