| 8:08p |
Opportunity Knocks
Opportunity.
This word stands alone, possessing the clout necessary for remarkable suggestions, spoken or otherwise. "Otherwise" is where we will begin.
Today a woman friend and I were standing in my laundry room talking and chewing over details concerning home improvement. It was only fitting that we discussed these mundane issues as the man I contracted to replace my privacy fence toiled outside a nearby window. As we looked on at his efforts the washing machine quit its rinse cycle and clicked over to spin it all out. It wasn't too far along in the spin cycle when the machine began to bump wildly under the strain of a lop-sided load. Since the wash load was comprised mostly of towels, the banging became heavy as sin and the carpenter outside heard it all and took notice.
It was at this point that my personality flourished. The bitch and I immediately locked eyes and recognized such a grand opportunity. Even before I settled into my intention, my giner-packing friend began to moan and "UNGH, UNGH, UNGH!" her ass off to the rhythm of the burdened washing machine. The laborer outside the window could only deer-in-headlights his stare as we put on an award-winning performance in the darkened room less than fifteen feet from him. It got really, really spectacular when the dialogue took a twist towards the bizarre and I began ordering my "lover" to fuck me back as I pounded and jammed HER toothbrush in her own ass! The only thing that could've topped the moment was produced when she then told me to brush my filthy mouth with her shit-stained toothbrush. None of this took very long as the ability to hold back laughter quickly diminished. So we spat out a few more obnoxious offerings before unloading together in orgasmic bliss. I lifted the lid to the washing machine, stopping the bangin', and then settled into a fine, muffled laugh fest with my companion.
Only one thing about all of this was tragic. It was in the fact that my female companion is lesbian. Honestly though, judging by the performance, I'm more than certain that she's taken some mean dick in her pre-taco slapper days. If that herman had been heterosexual, the levity of the moment would have most certainly led to one spectacular fuck fest.
Such is life, yo. Such is life. |