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Below are the 20 most recent journal entries recorded in
Tesco Mutherfuckin Vee's Blurty:
- Pumped out more coconut oil than Hawaiian Tropic
- Took notice of a definitive link between being a redheaded woman and loving it in the ass
- Was reintroduced to the beads
- Acquired a full-body sunburn...which is no fucking good
- Realized the full potential of the guest house as a roleplaying hideaway
- Became completely engulfed in the flames of lust as several appreciative guests looked on
- Drank myself sober before noon today
That last point of interest took more out of me than anything else handed out over the last thirty-six hours. I do feel as if this house is finally broken in and will look forward to keeping it in season. Will post more later when I get some fucking sleep. Pray for me...
I'll need it.
| Friday, September 5th, 2008 | |
| 8:39 am | Change of Plans Fuck it. I just switched my vacation plans and committed to a seven day cruise on Carnival. I'm gonna get fucking ripped in Jamaica for sure, mon. I'm heading over to the "MyCruise" portion of the website and will begin tacking on excursions. I'll share the info when i'm done choosing carefully based on frottering possibilities. Let's fuckin' hope there are NO bitch ass hurricanes during my scheduled week. Yank it until it spits at you. |
| Thursday, September 4th, 2008 | |
| 8:52 am | On The Fly Too much fucking SHIT going on. Some recent developments: At some point I will be in this chair long enough to shank off a decent post. Perhaps a post about tards, a post about fidgets, or possibly one concerning nuns. Shit, if you're lucky enough, I'll just post about retarded midget nuns. Keep touching yourself. Word. |
| Wednesday, August 27th, 2008 | |
| 5:30 pm | Lounge Act My bitch and her spot. This little hooker spends pretty much the entire day "sleeping" in this very spot. Sometimes, when the mood strikes, I sneak up on her and push her in. Word. |
| 10:45 am | Meant To Be It's like she's meant to be. Wrought and forthcoming, she stands in the doorway, clinging to me as the loose sands swift her away. There was this taste of something meant to be. Fervent muse, my white-hot fact, forever lost in what once was. I still dream of thee, just as easily wrested from the whisps of my smoky grasp as you ever were, much like the time we spent dancing around each other. You and I, the water turning down the drain of some ghostly opportunity. It's like it's meant to be. |
| Monday, August 25th, 2008 | |
| 10:37 am | Homage The painful silence. The absence of genius.  BRAP on. |
| Friday, August 22nd, 2008 | |
| 10:52 pm | Relief These faces of mine, brought together by the sutures of neccessity, have once again blended into one. Oh wretched, ghastly Mother of invention, don't worry, it's certain not to last very long. Bide thy time with thoughts of simplicity. Or you could simply take two and call me in the morning. |
| 7:27 am | 5:30 Wake Up It's inevitable. After some heavy hands, thick words, and the teasing trace of the tongue, she opens up to me like a 2006 Bourgogne Pinot Noir, full-bodied and delicious. A true oenophile I am not, but I know a great bottle of sex when I drink one. |
| Thursday, August 21st, 2008 | |
| 9:38 am | Word To Your Mother So things have been all fucked up and discombobulated aroud camp Tesco. Out of all the shit that has been swirling, I've one shimmering glance at hope...AN OFFER ON THE HOUSE IN CORPUS!!! I cannot tell you how nice it is to entertain a real offer, one that's both meaty enough to meet my buyout, as well as being backed by a very nice pre-approval letter and mortage lender. If I can clear this house and close on their September 26 date, I'll have gotten rid of thousands in out-the-door expenses each month. It sucks paying for something you no longer use, as well as the peripheral expenses such as utilities and taxes. Keep your labias and testicles crossed for good luck! And blow my disco dick. |
| Monday, August 18th, 2008 | |
| 9:18 am | Back In Black It began with an intent. An invite to a "ranch party" had me sold and I was happy to get up there and cook the brisket and borracho beans for the masses. I had went up to pregame Friday night, woke up at six the next morning to get the smoker ready for the six hour brisket roast. At nine a.m. marijuana walked through the door and it all went downhill from there. I remember bits and pieces of events, daytripping and such. I remember driving among the hilltops, sharing Sunlight and industrial music in the back of someone's Jeep, and keeping vigil over the vodka, smoke, and nude bodies alongside the Nueces River. Sometime Sunday, myself and the faceless wound up in some remote desert motel in West Texas, the air conditioning set to "arctic blast", fuming over chemicals and bad intentions. I haven't lost control like that in a few years. |
| Thursday, August 14th, 2008 | |
| 4:37 pm | Vacation Ho I'm thinking that I'm in need of a mini-vacation. Perhaps I'll spend some time wedged firmly up Ms. Debater's ass. This way I can have my lodging, relaxturbation and transportation taken care of in one single activity. Really though, I'm tired and in need of a break. I'm gonna try to go on some sort of a mini-vacation here in the next couple of months, regardless of whether or not the other house is sold. I'm thinking of something along the lines of the Northwestern U.S. |
| Wednesday, August 13th, 2008 | |
| 10:15 am | I've written so many posts that I've not committed to print. I've typed up so much on this day alone. I have deleted every bit of it. Too long. Too personal. I am stretched thin and burning at both ends. I feel like I am going to crash. |
| Friday, August 8th, 2008 | |
| 12:02 pm | Amazed I am once again AMAZED at how disgusting these people are. http://www.cbc.ca/canada/manitoba/story/2008/08/08/westboro-protest.html Even though I just aided them in their quest for publicity, I felt it neccessary to share this info since it still amazes me that NO ONE has buttfucked these cocksuckers with violence. With every whisp of my being, I promise you that, despite the poor bahaviour, I would find it IMPOSSIBLE to NOT bulldoze my way through any police en route to destroying at least one of them. I know that jail time would be on my horizon but if I overheard one of them utter a single derogatory word about my son, AT HIS FUNERAL, there would be no way anyone would stop me from hurting someone. No possible way. No fucking way. I'm so bent out of shape by this....and it's not even my blood. |
| Wednesday, August 6th, 2008 | |
| 10:57 pm | Negation Of Resolution My head is spinning like a turntable  spouting off lyrics of introspection, making and breaking me. My head, smooth and loose by twos...by twos. For every thought forward, I fall two thoughts back...to a time when I did not need wings. Oh, treachery, free my breaking mind and fill my every moment with uncertainty and hysteria. Drench this grey and aging desert between my ears. At least there'll be something familiar and consistent restricted, suffocating, and absolute. At least there'll be me. |
| 10:51 pm | I'm Not Anyone For You God damn, there was something I had to say...that didn't matter anyway. Some storm was coming earlier, separating light from darkness. I was just about to paralyze the conflict within when something made me think of you. The first cold gusts of something new blew through... I'll never ever forget it. |
| Sunday, August 3rd, 2008 | |
| 7:15 am | Success So the trip was a success. I actually made a point to NOT look for familiar faces and instead took to the relaxation. The picture situation was a failure since I took the piece of shit camera that has been fucking up, spewing forth muddied pictures awash in some yellowish hue. I did manage to save a couple of photos to share. Basically, these are three places I'd love to have at the moment, but with multi-million dollar prices, won't be spilling booze in anytime soon ;) Nice house situated on a nice bend in the river. I used to beach my SeaDoo right where this fucker is located and smoke a bowl or two. Since this thing stole my kick back spot, I figure the bitch belongs to me.  This one's right across the river from my parent's place and is only a year old. If I got this one I could drive across the river and raid my folk's refrigerator on a daily basis ;) I included the "for sale" website for your viewing pleasure. Check out the little koi pond at this place. It would be a kickass tank for piranha! http://www.rafa-rafa.com//218_River_Ranch_Rd  This place is spread like a redhead and is GORGEOUS. You really can't see the ranchhouse since it's tucked away, and I was being pulled over by the river cops at the moment and unable to go closer for picture-taking time, but trust me, it's some primo real estate.  Well, that's enough for now. Tune in later for an episode where Tesco filches dirty Polaroids out of the mudchutes of transsexuals for twenty dollar bills. |
| Friday, August 1st, 2008 | |
| 4:29 pm | Road Treep Well i'm going to be taking the rompingly scenic drive up to my parent's house at the lake. I've eagerly anticipated being able to make this particular drive for some years (as the drive from my home to the lakehouse) and am finally going to be making it. I will take pictures here and there during the trip. Ms. Debater, I'll be back to rub your genitals tomorrow night so get your nethers shorn and lathered up. This time I ain't takin' "no" for a fucking answer. Au revoir. p.s. - While i'm AWOL, take the time to check out Google Street View. I have enjoyed Google Earth in the past but found this distraction quite fun as I could "revisit" some of my old stomping grounds. Go fuck yourselves. |
| Thursday, July 31st, 2008 | |
| 11:15 pm | Neck Of The Woods Standing on the beach had its perks. And so does this...  |
| 5:17 pm | Not For Long Oh? What's this? ...an unopened bottle of rum? |
| Monday, July 28th, 2008 | |
| 9:57 am | A Sphincter Says "What?" So there I was, plowing my thickened cock into this large breasted redhead. I was enjoying the aesthetically pleasing image of my hard dick stretching this womans soaked pussy and as I casually pressed my thumb into her pristine asshole, I couldn't help but wander off into thought. How could such a fantastic anal catcher possess such a beautiful cinnamon ring? Certainly, at least in the vast majority of cases, oversexed buttfuckers like this woman sport the typical busted starfish backdoor. Most lovers of the snugly fitted cock will have a chewed bubblegum asshole, a bit darkened and worn. Perhaps a blueberry or two will make an appearance, most certainly as a sizeable cock does its dip duty. This chick had NONE of that. Not only was she a rabid taker of cock in the ass, but being thirty-seven and certainly within the age bracket shared by many a deviled eggshooter, she had taken more than enough rockets up her mud trail to NOT show the signs of normal wear and tear. It was at the terminate of this poignant thought when it occurred to me... Perhaps she had NEVER taken a decent sized pounder in her back door. Just as quickly as that thought graced my brainpan, I withdrew my slickened cock, wretchedly struck her nalgas with a pucker inducing slap and violently bumrushed her browneye! That brave whore bowed her backbone with the shock of an illegal lane-change and then pressed eagerly back into it. I KNEW it fucking hurt and smiled as she settled in for the initial adjustment period, one that would've been much more user friendly had I first signaled and then eased over. My lover finally dropped her back and rolled her hips with each thrust. She was pained in accommodation and now loving every sensuous second of this unnatural feeding time. I don't know what it was. Perhaps it was simple aggression in the face of an eager fuck machine of a woman. Did I unconsciously heed the advice of a sharpened sense of primal, carnal interpretation? Was I acting on subtle, unspoken signals conveyed by my lover? Or was it something more sinister? I like to think that it was a basic matter of distate in the face of utter waste. Perhaps I simply wanted to destroy something beautiful. I'm thinking that I looked down at that unfettered asshole and decided to paint it in pain and physical damage for the pleasure of her lovers to come. I believe that I saw something that needed to exhibit the signs of appropriate abuse. I wanted to be the man who ruined her shit...literally. We'll talk more later. |
| 1:03 am | A New House Christened I'm finally taking refuge from an exhausting weekend. The house is clear (except for one left in the bed) and the alcohol stores have been depleted. Some facts of the case: |