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Saturday, August 9th, 2003
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4:41 pm - The End
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It has a certain sense of finality to it doesn't it?
Well as the title says, this post is about the end. The end of many things today, but the most immediate one that will instantly be noticeable is the end of this blog. Yeah, show's over, I'm tired.
There are several reasons why, so if you allow me to elaborate, I'll explain the reasons behind it.
This blog was started on the 31st of January, Friday, Chinese New Years Day to be precise. There were several reason behind starting this blog. I wanted a sort of outlet for my emotions that I wouldn't normally release in public. This mainly refers to the anger and rage I sometimes feel when I'm tense, frustrated or hurt either by persons or events. Secondly, I wanted to do a sort of writing on a daily basis that didn't involve explaining why MacBeth was a play about gender enpowerment followed by obscure quotes. Lastly, I wanted to let people know the real me.
Its been about half a year, and has this blog fulfilled any of the aims surrounding its inception? no. All too sudden I realised that the nature of the person I am naturally meant that a huge part of what I call my "public persona" inevitably leaked into cyberspace; ie, this blog. The nature of the blog, ergo, its openness to others, meant that because there is still an audience, I will still perform. Secondly, this also meant that I could not find an outlet for the anger inside because of the sizeable audience that started reading this blog. People I hadn't talked to since high school, people that I saw irregularly, were reading this collection of my thoughts. This in turm meant I started restricting what I said and didn't say in fear of offending or hurting someone. The very nature of who I am meant that I would naturally keep these "dark feelings" bottled deep inside of me.
Lastly, I am ending this blog because I am an idiot. No, I'm serious. I say a lot of stupid things, often without thinking. And all throughout my life, I have been getting in trouble because of something I have said to offend someone. This is further compounded because if I say something stupid in one of these blurty posts, it is open for all and sundry to see. So while if I did say something stupid in person, there were chances that it would go unnoticed and missed. However, that is not the case when it comes to a blog.
I don't know..its just I'm confused at the moment. I don't know how people percieve me anymore....am I a jerk? a loud embarrassing ass? a naive little child?.....Who loves me? who hates me? who is indifferent?. I think in this modern age, communication is all too often increasingly reliant on emotionless communication through written form, such as the internet. And because of this it is very hard, for me especially, to know if I have hurt/offended someone, if I cannot hear their voice, see their face.. So that's my main reason. The same goes for people wanting to know me. You want to know me? Talk to me! Ask me what you want, let me ask you what I want! Life is too short to play it shy - time less spent pussyfooting around means more time to spend with each other, more time enjoying each other's presence!!
I have love to give, to share..... won't you accept?
With end, comes beginning. I said earlier that there were changes in the air, though little did I know what would come. I decided that I'm going to reinvent myself. I'm going to try and be more reserved now, inject a certain sense of dignity into my life, instead of jumping around like the fucking Mad Hatter at 3 o'clock tea time.
In other words, I'm going to be a different person.
Thanks to all who gave their time to read my thoughts, my fears, my dreams and aspirations. Thanks to all whose comments helped me when I was feelin' blue, thanks to all who gave me no small measure of joy in their comments and thoughts....just remember, this isn't the end..all you have to do is talk to me ;)
So from Jase the clown, Jase the seedy, Jase the embarassment, Jase the child, the old Jase........
Goodbye, finis, sayonara, auf viederzhen.
GG NO RE KTHNXBYE
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(2 Dead opinions | Where your opinions come to die)
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| Wednesday, August 6th, 2003
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8:14 pm - Girls!
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| Sunday, August 3rd, 2003
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3:42 pm - Changez Dans Le Ciel?
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Simply translated, it means "Changes in the air"
Last week has been, quite simply, a week of change. Every once in a while I like to change things, inject a breath of fresh air into my life. Sometimes its big, sometimes its small. I mean, the most obvious is of course, I decided to cut my hair shorter than usual, which probably wasn't a good idea aesthetically speaking, but I felt that short hair would be a nice change. Secondly is, of course, the new look blurty with which your eyes are feasting on like a pack of vultures in a slaughterhouse. This IS the proper layout, after I reverted it back from that crazy palestinian AL Shufti's hack. ;) The thing is though, change is sometimes good for a person. I mean, it really does inject some colour into a world that can be staid and mundane. Monotony is an evil that we can all avoid. I guess its the little things like this that keeps me (relatively) sane. Talking about change, it was my very good friend, Dominic, that had his birthday yesterday. He is now 20. That's right, no longer a teenager. Sounds so....adult, doesn't it? And while he, and the rest of us, are still the same, it made me think...what will I be like in several years time? Will I be all grown up, mature? Or will I stay the same kid that I have been for the last 6 years? I can't really picture me as an adult to tell you the truth. In fact, people always assume I'm 1-2 yrs younger than what i actually am. So, when I reach that magical threshold between teen and adulthood, how will I change? Just as importantly, how will the people around me change? Will they mature quickly? These days we have now are slowly eroding away. I can feel it. I can sense the feeling of..........
inevitability.
I sense my post to be a little disjointed, for which I apologise, but there are things I must attend to. By the way, how is my new look blurty? I've made it deliberately minor because I am lazy, but thoughts on it or anything else is welcome.
I'm on my way to god don't know
My brain's a burger
And my heart's the coal
I'm trying to get my head clear
I push things out through
My mouth but get refilled though my ears
- "Heart Cooks Brain" Modest Mouse
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(Where your opinions come to die)
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| Wednesday, July 30th, 2003
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3:18 pm - JAES TEH GIRL
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HALO FREINDS IT IS ME AGIAN, AL SHUFTI. TODAE JAES POSTED TEH FOLLWOING:
Hey hey! ANother skipped day at uni, I am so bad TT. I have a good reason though, when I walked out to my bust stop and saw the jam on the freeway, a little feeling i made up called cantbefuckage set in, and I just went home. Err...that's about it really.......boring huh? :/
AHAHAHAAH YES VARY RITE TI WAS BROING!!1 ALL I SAN C HEAR SII AM JAES N I AM A LITTAL GIRL WHO CATN SATND THA RAIN!!1 I ALSO TINK I HAEV CHANSES WIF VARY SEKSI WIMMIN AHAHAHAHA WHAT A FAG0T!!!
I HAEV BEEN REEDING THSI SITE AND I MUSS SYA IT IS VARY BORING! NO WONDAR NO1 REEDS IT!!1 IT NEEDS MORE STUF ABT BOMING JEWS AND KICKING JWES AND OTHAR JEW REALTED STUF! THEER SI TOO MUCH SEKS TALK ON THIS JURNEL!! WHERE I CUM FORM, WE R ILAMSC MUSLMIS!! TAHT MENAS SEKS SI ILEGAL!!
MUST GO MAEK BOMB NOW!1 REMBAR TEH AEMRICAN GOVARMANT LIES 2 U!!1
OK CU L8ER
- AL SHUFTI MUKMUK
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(6 Dead opinions | Where your opinions come to die)
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| Monday, July 28th, 2003
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9:33 pm - Free Paelstin!!11
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hay bros n comreads!! Tis is Al Shufti Mukmuk and i have haxed tis jurnel!! i have cum to takl to u abt paelstin!!11 as u mite have gessed, i am a paelstitan!! why have shufti taekn ovar this jurnel u asx? i well tel u y! the evel ppls of isril is opresing teh paelstitin ppl! we r pees loveing ppl taht once lived wif teh jews, until 1 dae they stoel owr hjoems and beet owr dogs!! noew we muss return peese to paelstin buy boming teh evel jewish childran n othar dengerus jews who trehtan paelstitans n theyre peas loveing waeys!1!! BOMING SI OK IF IST 4 PEASE!!1
rembar!! free paelstin n retrun peas bye kilin teh jews!!
yuor frendly peas lovein parsen,
al shufti mukmuk
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(Where your opinions come to die)
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| Tuesday, July 22nd, 2003
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11:59 pm - Internet: So Many Brave Souls
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I love the way people communicate on the internet. Firstly are those who decide to make personal attacks against people they know, or more commonly, don't know, over the safe anonymity of the internet. 2ndly, i luv teh ppls hoo 5p34|< in 1337 so ppls cannot undarstend. Lastly I especially enjoy reading stuff where people decide fullstops are too cool for them so they write really long sentences that to say in real life would cause asphyxiation and then make people DIE!!!
Of course Jo was a target of the first exmple recently, which brought back memories of my own brush with stupidity. While this guy simply was making a personal attack on Jo (which leads me to believe its probably someone she knows), mine made for more entertaining reading when he called one of Shakespeare's works "Another stupid poem. Gutter poetry. I could write better after a frontal lobotomy"
So to summarise,
The Internet: Where retards have a voice.
Assorted stuff I've been surfing which may be of interest, mainly because I'm bored and HOLY CRAP I HAVE AN 8AM START
Hamburger recipes mmmm.
Driver Prolongs Hostage Situation
Aggressive pig sparks helicopter chase
Masturbation 'may prevent cancer'. AHAHAHAHAAH
Man cuts off penis, eats it. Tastes like chicken?
60 Percent Of Women Get Lap Dances. Sounds like happy days?
Theres something about schoolgirls
Live the dream Jason, live the dream
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(5 Dead opinions | Where your opinions come to die)
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| Monday, July 21st, 2003
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6:48 pm - First Day of Uni
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My first day of uni for the second semester today. To tell you the truth, I wasn't feeling myself today. No, not that way, but you know, just not myself. It's like someone else takes over my body for a period of time or something, because I generally have no recollection what I do during these times, like today. It's kinda scary actually, so I try not to think about it too much. I feel like chatting to a girl now actually, it usually makes me feel better, but with Big Brother in 15mins I doubt that will be possible ;P While I don't follow BB enough to jump on the Reggie bandwagon, I'd rather Chrissie NOT win it, so err..go Reggie?
Anyway, I have to cook my own dinner tonight, so I'm off to do terrible things in the kitchen
"I'll never trust anything from Kazakhstan again"
Is it thy will thy image should keep open
My heavy eyelids to the weary night?
Dost thou desire my slumbers should be broken,
While shadows like to thee do mock my sight?
Is it thy spirit that thou send'st from thee
So far from home into my deeds to pry,
To find out shames and idle hours in me,
The scope and tenor of thy jealousy?
O, no! thy love, though much, is not so great:
It is my love that keeps mine eye awake;
Mine own true love that doth my rest defeat,
To play the watchman ever for thy sake:
For thee watch I whilst thou dost wake elsewhere,
From me far off, with others all too near.
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(Where your opinions come to die)
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| Friday, July 18th, 2003
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3:08 pm - It's My Birthday ^^
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Party on Garth. Party on Wayne!
Well today is my birthday, a little older, a little ...well, not wiser, but more experienced in the ways of life. Thank you very much to those who wished me a happy birthday, especially those who msged me (I have no credit so I cannot reply), but know that I'm very moved by the love shown to me today......no, its just something in my eye ;P
Also a big happy birthday to my fellow bday boy, John!!
Much love to everyone!
UPDATE: ooh err almost forgot...I will be in freo tonight, so if you find yourself in the vicinity, come and join me for drinks!!
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(Where your opinions come to die)
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| Tuesday, July 15th, 2003
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9:25 pm - Happy Birthday Mr President
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Yeah well, I'm feeling a bit better about this whole life thing I guess, but I know it's going to be a whole new Jase when it comes to study and work, and less time wishing my life away on less constructive pursuits. It was my fault after all, so its time to mend the break!!
Well it's my birthday this Friday, as some of you have reminded me , so I guess I should be excited about the whole thing huh? To be honest, my birthday doesn't really mean much to me. In my family, there doesn't seem to be too much emphasis on certain occasions, and birthdays are one of them. I mean, they do recognize it, but its not really a big thing, and while for me it used to be a big thing, as the years went by I guess I started to lose my enthusiasm about the whole thing. To be honest, my friends attach more importance about it than my family, and I only remembered it was approaching when one of my friends, Jonno, reminded me. Well, there was John too, but its kinda expected since his birthday lies on the same day. Poor guy, to be born on the same day as a celebrity like me. Sucks to be him ;) . I'm sure there will be something informal to mark the event on the night, probably drinks at some watering hole, but I have yet to work out the details with the fellow birthday boy. Once its worked out, I'll post the details so everyone has the chance to come along, meet the legend in person, get some autographs, sex...y'know, the usual ;P
No seriously though, birthdays make me nervous. I mean, I really don't understand why it does make me nervous. I think it might be the attention I receive on my birthday. Yes yes, I am pretty outgoing (or as I like to call it, an attention whore) so I do receive some attention when I'm around, but when it comes to my birthday, I get all quiet, mumbly and tongue tied like some schoolgirl with a crush. I think its because I'm sort of overwhelmed by the feelings I see people have for me. In my house, my parents are very reserved people when it comes to affection, so to have them recognize my bday, to show more affection and attention than normal everyday life, confuses me and throws me off whack, but in a happy pleasant way. To make me feel weird even more, my friends generally remember my bday too, and the affection they show towards me usually humbles me and makes me appreciative of the friendships I have formed with people. So to sum it up, I think its the love that people show to me that makes me happy and humble and nervous and appreciative all at the same time. Come to think of it, there is something special about birthdays, isn't there?
Lastly, I must watch Charlie's Angels 2. Three very hot chicks play it up on the big screen, who can resist? Not me. I am a guy after all....Apparently Pirates of the Caribbean is a very good movie, so I might watch that too. I saw some photos of the main actress at a premiere, and she was very very nice, until there was one picture at an angle that uncomfortably reminded me about Perly. Turn off. I guess her legacy will always live on :/ . Hopefully it won't detract from the movie.
Up, up and away!!
(Here is a non-Perly looking picture of her...her name is Keira Knightley)
PS: I know this is mean but.....ahahahaha
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(5 Dead opinions | Where your opinions come to die)
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| Sunday, July 13th, 2003
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11:32 pm - Wake Up And Smell The Fucking Roses Mr Hoon
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Got my results back and I didn't do too well. Indeed, I am in the severely uncomfortable position I like to call extremely fucked. Suprises all around, good and bad. So, assuming I stay in uni, I'm going to have to sort my affairs in order and get my life back on the proper road again. So while I ponder whether I ought to ram my head against the wall repeatedly until I am some sort of drooling invalid, heres a piece of advice: DON'T BE LIKE ME
Oh yeah Ken, mine and jus's accts: StarSoBright and AngelsofAnarchy
btw Ken you gotta introduce me to your gf
Lastly, apparently its my birthday this friday....I was going to go somewhere with this, but now I really need to be alone...I will be back later
I'll meet you yesterday when the world was brighter
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(Where your opinions come to die)
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| Wednesday, July 9th, 2003
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4:48 pm - Happy Days?
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Hi all again, it's time for another update of what's been happening since Thursday, because what I do during the holidays is of utmost importance to you and forms the foundations of your life. That's right, I feel the love. I'll do things in chronological order because I want to.
Well firstly on Friday I went shopping with the two Rebeccas, or more correctly, they went shopping while I made irrelevant comments about the whole process and talking to Jonno, who was my fellow male dragged along to the whole thing. Personally I thought I'd be bored, but was reasonably entertained by the whole process, probably because Jonno. I'm pretty sure they went into 90% of the clothes shops at Garden City, but didn't get anything until the end. I guess it was because they were looking for a specific item of clothing, but their description of this certain pair of jeans left me dumbfounded and had me nodding my head stupidly like a jack in the box. Friday was also a momentous occasion for me, mainly because it marked the end of a self imposed exile from that den of scum and villainy that most people call Burswood Casino. Yeah, that place. My friends having finally recovered from the shock of an unlucky night, decided to try their luck against Lady Fortune yet again. Unfortunately, Lady Fortune is a fickle dame, and though their luck varied up and down throughout the night, in the end one made money, one lost money. I myself did not feel the need to actually properly gamble, instead I put one dollar in a pokie machine, and after about 20 minutes of mindless button mashing and occasional yelps of "woohoo" to draw attention to myself, made a whole $3.20, after which I and my stalwart companion Dom went to the Champion's Bar (its the sports bar) and contented ourselves to the less risky pleasures of conversation, sport and alcohol, an excellent mix indeed. In fact, that night was the night that I finally met John's gf, by the name of Emma (or Em). It was quite a small world actually, as she actually remembered me from her brief stint in UWA last year. I guess I make lasting impressions ;P. In fact, she was in my tute for Asian Studies, and remembered me as the "Irrelevant guy", which generally is an accurate description of me. So I did have a chat with her, and I must say, I was very impressed by her actually. No, not that way, but she was quite fun to talk to, and so earns major points with me as an approving friend. John, you did well buddy ;) Just don't do anything stupid ok? (It's a scientific fact guys are overwhelmed by the compulsion to say/do something stupid when they have a good thing coming). All in all, a fun night actually.
Err Saturday I had work for most of the day, then went over to George's house for drinks, and evidently, by the fact that there was porn showing on tv, a porn night. Now, don't get me wrong, porn can be highly entertaining at certain times, what with the dialogue and everything, but the porn that was showing was just sex. Yes, yes, that's what porn is about, but for me porn just isn't entertaining if there isn't flimsy excuses for sex or extremely hackneyed one liners. I mean, without all those essentials, its just a boring repetition of both parties going down on each other, sex in several different positions finished off by faked orgasms, then wash, rinse and repeat. Luckily they got bored of it after about 20mins, after which we switched to ID4, discovering that in the final climax of the movie, the dialogue was much much worse. Yuck. It was ok I guess, though to be perfectly honest I would've rather stayed at home. However, sometimes its about the time you spend together, not what you do that makes thses gatherings important. I like to think I'm a good friend, or as close to it as I can. Speaking of which, I haven't been that to my uni friends though, sorry guys, but everytime I wanna call you guys I get called in to work, so hopefully I'll see you all sooner or later. In fact, I don't think I've seen anyone from uni since last Monday, with the exception of Val, who I saw at Sunday Mass.
Asides from that, I've been alternately working or sleeping, which is not actually very exciting news, though to be honest none of the stuff in this post is. However, its the holidays, and I'm sure everyone has better things to do than read my blog. Oh yes, I might be going to Steve's tonight, though that hasn't been confirmed.
Hello, I must be going!
- Jase
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(2 Dead opinions | Where your opinions come to die)
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| Tuesday, July 8th, 2003
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2:41 am - Who Really Cares?
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*sigh*
Its past 2am, and I can't sleep. So here I am thinking about stuff.
Such a pretty garden
Behind the pretty fence
I thought some lilies might cheer you up
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(Where your opinions come to die)
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| Thursday, July 3rd, 2003
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1:36 am - Secret Fantasies Revealed!!!
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I have several secret fantasies, all of which I intend to fulfil before I die (which, according to the Deathday Deciderthingy, will be roughly six years from now...and we all know internet scripts are accurate down to the micron!!).
And, believe it or not, none of them are sexually oriented in any way (dressing in women clothing and trying to pick up sailors is NOT sexual...uh..if I was to do so... I mean..if I wanted to...which I don't...*phew*)
One of them is an old one, which I've been harbouring since I was very young. It is essentially very simple, to the point of fault. What I intend to do, is one day, walk out my door, and keep walking, letting my feet take me to new places, new experiences. It's been something I've wanted to do for a long while now, ever since I first read a book called "The Hobbit". I've always wondered what would happen if I did, and if there's one thing I know about myself, its that I am insatiably curious. This journey would be like a learning experience of sorts, except this sort of learning is fun and not crammed down your throat, then forces you to regurgitate on demand. Come to think about it, it'll be like one of those "coming of age" movies, where the main character goes through some experience that inevitably transforms him/her to adulthood. I can just picture it now...unburdened and free, my only possession and companion, the walking stick in my hand, striking out east until I decide its time to go home. Perhaps I'll be more of a "questing knight" adventurer, righting wrongs, changing lives and teaching women how to love ;) I can almost feel the tingle of excitement, the anticipation, of starting out on a new journey, with no intention other than embrace life to it's fullest...........the gypsy lifestyle, and perhaps, the happiest of them all.......
Secondly, though not really a secret one, is to write a novel. I'm not sure what sort of novel it would be though...I guess it would depend on how I'm feeling as I write it. It would either be a comedy novel, or maybe fantasy oriented, or some serious book tackling real life issues, or even maybe, some combination thereof. Maybe something about a bumbling wizard that through a progression of increasingly unbelievable wacky hijinks brings about religious harmony, solves world hunger, and kills George Bush...or at least maims him a little. At the very least, whatever I write, I want someone, whether an old man in a retirement home, to a young child raised on pokemon and playstation, to pick up the book, read it, and discover the joy a book can bring, even if there isn't any sex at all. I want them to open their eyes, have a new perspective on things, on life. In short, I want to change a person's life, no matter how small, or insignificant.
Thirdly, I want to sell drugs to underage kids, and thereby creating a new generation of crackwhores, druggies and pimps, thereby providing society with a vital service, which would be to introduce future kids to the heady world of drugs and sex. Not really, but I wanted to shock you a bit ;P
Fourthly, I'm going to try terrorism for hire, that is, perpetrating acts of terror at a very low low price. Keep your hands clean! Mass destruction cheap!! Definite civilian casualties, or your money back guaranteed!! Blowing stuff up using home made bombs from the Anarchists' Cookbook, creating mass panic, all under the guise of religious reasons, how could one resist?! No, really, this time I'm being serious. You can stop laughing now. Really.
Lastly, I want to be a hermit for awhile, pondering about the mysteries of the universe, the meaning of life, or more likely, lazing around doing nothing all day.
Ok, time to come clean, only three of them were serious, but some secret fantasies are....y'know...secret. To reveal all would be to die of, get this, embarrassment (yes, I do feel such things at times), but are of no doubt of personal importance to me. Anyway, that just about wraps it up for today, just thought I'll share some of my fantasies, and perhaps make you think about yours, and to try and fulfill yours too. On a last note, I've been trying meditation, and you would not believe how relaxing it is, not to mention it leaves you free to think about things, of which it is my firm belief everyone should do once in a while.
Anyway, hopefully I'll be getting TFT soon, so treasure my little imprint on your life while you can ;P
"Would you turn to lesbianism?" - Perhaps not, but maybe try it out and let people watch. Like me. I'm sorry, I could not resist. I tried, but I'm only human *breaks down sobbing*
;P
- JaSe
"There are many sure things in life, but for you, sex is not one of them" - Jase
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(3 Dead opinions | Where your opinions come to die)
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| Saturday, June 28th, 2003
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8:23 pm - Mr E is a Genius
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Mr E is the nickname of the lead singer/song writer of the band The Eels
At times depressive, melancholy, to sprightly cheery, and sometimes, childish tunes, it suits the many moods I have...
It's A Motherfucker
It's a Motherfucker
Being here without you
Thinking about the good times
Thinkin about the bad
And I won't ever be the same
It's a Motherfucker
Getting through a Sunday
Talking to the walls just me again
But I won't ever be the same
I won't ever be the same
It's a Motherfucker
How much I understand
The meaning that you need someone
To could take you by the hand
And you won't ever be the same
You won't ever be the same
For those that didn't know, my comrade in arms, Chris, celebrated his bday jointly with Scott last night ( his actual bday is 4 July), and in the process got very drunk and let loose. I guess he had fun ;) You still have time to say Happy Bday!!! So Chris, hope you feel better today, much <3 ok buddy? ;)
He is leaving for Sydney on....Monday(?).. Have very much fun!!
Oh yes, Massive 'grats to Jonno and John...one has a date and the other a girlfriend....ahh how fast they've grown...*sniff*
quote from last night:
"There is nothing sexier than a man who can dance"
well....fuck. ;D
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(3 Dead opinions | Where your opinions come to die)
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| Wednesday, June 25th, 2003
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12:23 am - Holiday Blues
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Well the whole "Its the holidays" thing has set in, and with that comes the inevitable boredom that holidays can lead to. I've been catching up with all my friends I haven't seen for ages, hanging around, having fun, but for most of the short duration that I have been in holiday for, I've been bored.
"Get a job!" I hear the old timers say, and I agree...I have a job. However for this week at least, I don't have too many hours, and so for the most of my day I've just been bumming around, as half my friends have full time jobs or, for the poor soul of my brother in arms, Jonno, he still has one more exam.
So I've decided what better way to relieve the boredom is by doing things I didn't manage to do/put off since I started the semester. One of them is, get this, exercise. I'm almost positive that exercise is totally unhealthy for you if it wasn't for the fact that the whole weight of medical opinion is on the contrary. However, unhealthy or not, I've taken up jogging to improve my health so I can increase my chances of living past twenty, and, heaven forbid, father children. I exaggerate, I'm not that unhealthy, but it would be nice to be healthier. Its still a far cry from what my fitness oriented family are demanding from me, but I seriously can't bring myself to go to a gym and exercise there. My excuse is that I might inadvertently turn gay from all those studs in the gym, but I think I secretly yearn for the good ol' days of being young and carefree, running around with the wind in your hair, chasing that pretty girl for a quick kis- but I digress.
Besides that, I think I'm going to do more writing...first on the cards is a romantic typical guy meets girl story, and maybe after that a murder mystery. I've never done either genres, so it'll be interesting how well I go at it. Talking about writing, I've finally finished Harry Potter: Order of the Phoenix. Seriously, for the first half of the book Harry just pissed me off...which is probably a credit to the writer in managing to be able to construct a realistic 15yo, but its only a small consolation. In fact, I threw the book down several times and went off to do something else because he as annoying me that much....like most people his age. I also didn't like her attempt at romance for Harry, which I thought was shallow and lacking in, for want of a better word, passion. In fact, it was almost so incidental she might as well not have put it in the book. Don't get me wrong though, the book was good, and I look forward to waiting for 4 years for the next book.
Anyway, thats it for today,
Stay tuned for the next post of sarcasm and lowbrow funnies as well as Jase's Thoughts ABout Stuff..can't wait huh?
Neither can I ;)
P.S If any one of you fuckers are subscribing me to fetish porn emailing lists, stop it! Its already enough I get spam on how to enlarge my penis for $1 or viruses disguised as lesbian porn without getting emails with titles like "Chicks with dicks!! XXX"......
P.P.S I wonder whether you really can enlarge your penis for a buck.....not that I need it of course. *cough*
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(2 Dead opinions | Where your opinions come to die)
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| Sunday, June 22nd, 2003
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8:59 pm - NEVER SLEEP UNLESS YOU ARE DREAMING OF BAWLS!
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HAHAHAAHAHAHAH
There's a high caf energy drink in the US called BAWLS. That's right. You can of course guess where I am going with this.
I mean, imagine being a director for BAWLS in a board meeting:
"As you can see in the marketing survey, everyone loves the taste of BAWLS. Such is the popularity of BAWLS that we have widely penetrated the market to the extent where in the future, no party is complete without people holding BAWLS in each hand. BAWLS is without doubt the new delicious taste of the youth....and what the hell are you guys laughing at?"
ahahaah wtf was the guy thinking?
"Eureka! I have created the ultimate energy drink! However, I need a name that everyone can take seriously....I know! BAWLS! No one will dare laugh at me now!!"
I'm over it.....I'm a bit tired though..I guess I need some BAWLS in me!
ahahahahahahahahaha
*falls off chair laughing*
I am a comedy goldmine.
Speaking of which - Do you love the Iraqi Information Minister? I do. Peruse these photoshopped antics of the guy...very very funny..in fact, funnier than my waste of time post...enjoy!!
Mohammad Said al-Sahaf tells it how it is
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(4 Dead opinions | Where your opinions come to die)
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| Friday, June 20th, 2003
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7:57 pm - No More Exams!!
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See above title.
OmigoshOmigoshOmigoshOmigoshOmigosh Harry Potter :Order of the Phoenix comes out tomorrow!! I seriously considered going to a bookshop at 7am for one, but realised I'd rather sleep in ;P I definitely will get it tho, it seems quite good, especially since one of the main characters' dies!!
J.K. Rowling, author of the "Harry Potter" books, shown in this Oct. 20, 2000, file photo, cried after she wrote the scene in which one of the series' main characters dies, she said in a television interview. ``Harry Potter and the Order of the Phoenix,'' the fifth installment in Rowling's wildly popular children's series about a boy wizard, comes out Saturday, June 21, 2003. Its plot is a closely guarded secret, but Rowling has said one of the central characters dies in the book. She hasn't even told her husband, Neil Murray, which one it is, she said in a British Broadcasting Corp. interview airing Thursday, June 19, 2003.
Anyway, I'm going drinking tonight with my mate Brendan at a local pub - its been too long since my last drink ;P
Anyway, I know most of you still have exams, so good luck!!!
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(1 Dead opinion | Where your opinions come to die)
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| Saturday, June 14th, 2003
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10:42 pm - So I Lied. Sue Me. No, Not Literally
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Ok, that last post wasn't quite my last post for the week. My cousins are here, so there won't be any study tonight. No, its not because they are loud, but the fact that I can't resist playing with them, they are too cute ^^. They are the sisters I never had.
I am a sucker for little kids ;)
PS.: I'm trying to find the lyrics for the songs from The Jungle Book. No kid's education is complete until he or she knows the Bear Necessities (the song Baloo sings..I think thats what its called) off by heart!!
My heart belongs to the girl (or guy ^^) who can sing it off by heart ;P
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(1 Dead opinion | Where your opinions come to die)
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| Thursday, June 12th, 2003
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3:42 pm - A Moment in Heaven
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Well this will be my last post for the next week or so, what with exams and so on, try to refrain from going insane with Jase withdrawal...locking yourself up in a room with constant dripping water should help....trust me on this. Oh yeah. Before I go back to my study I'm going to relate to you this dream I had last night, in an effort to immortalize for posterity the brief, shining moment where I was in a much better place. Got your hot chocolate and favourite teddy ready? good, cos I know I do. Forgive any holes there may be, as it is only half remembered, and is now as I type this slowly slipping away.
I open my eyes, and the first thing I notice is that I am holding hands with a girl. Yeah, that's right, a girl. I immediately let go, in fear that I might have contracted some virulent form of girl cooties. Hugging that teddy tight? its ok, it was just a dream. No, I'm kidding, at least about the letting go part. You know how in dreams, sometimes you have information that you have no idea where you got it from? Like you've just been dumped halfway through the story, and now you act out the rest of it? Well that was what was happening to me. I knew immediately that this girl and I had very strong feelings for each other, yet we hadn't formally expressed it to each other yet. Its like when a girl and a guy act like a couple, and you know they like each other, but when you ask them, they avoid the question like the plague? Well that was the case here. Her hand is very soft, and warm, and our grip is firm. I've got this feeling of..well, joy I guess....its the warm happy feeling you get when you're alone with the girl you like, and you know that she feels the same way about you...that feeling. Its probably one of the best feelings you can feel in all your life, it is very pleasant. I remember that it was a beautiful, warm sunny day, with not a cloud in the sky. She leads me through a relatively rural, small country town, and we stop by all the standard locations that exist in a town, like a barber, a cafe, deli, etc. As we stop along each location, she takes one look, and continues on, pulling me with her. I sense that she is looking for something, or some place. While we travel from location to location, she doesn't say a word. I say nothing too, lest I distract her from her task. After awhile, we come across a set of railroad tracks, and she leads me there, until we are sitting relatively close to the tracks. She's holding both my hands now, and she faces me,a nervous, but earnest, expression on her face. For some reason, I know that she is about to confess her love for me. We are silent for awhile, facing each other. Then, looking past her, I notice a train is coming. In a sudden flash of insight, I realize my time with her is coming to an end. I ask her what she wants to say. She is silent, still unable to say what she wants to say. I urgently ask her again, as the train approaches closer. I'm desperate now, and I plead with her to tell me before its too late. That's the exact thought I'm thinking,so I think its the dream telling me my time is almost up. The train is getting louder and louder, and I can barely hear my own voice. Finally, she opens her mouth to tell me, and as she does so, the train whips past, drowning out everything she is saying. Her hair is blowing wildly all around her face, but she seems not to notice the noise or the wind. I tell her I can't hear her, but she doesn't seem to hear me. I lean forward really close, and up until now I still don't know whether I'm doing it to kiss her, or because I want to hear her. Either way, it doesn't matter...as I lean forward, there's a bright flash of light, and I wake up....sad, frustrated, and extremely annoyed.
I don't know what is sadder though, the fact that I couldn't hear what she had to say, or that I don't remember what she looks like. I know deep down, somewhere, that she was the girl of my dreams, and it would've been nice to see what my dream girl looked like. All I know is that she is shortish, petite, and, well, Asian ;P All I can remember is her back, from when she is leading me around the town. She has shoulder length hair.
*sigh* I doubt I'm gonna remember the dream in any sort of detail in a week's time, mores the pity. Its the third time in my life I've had this sort of dream, and in every dream I get separated from her, and in every instance, I cannot remember the dream in its entirety, and forget the details within a week. However, its a different looking girl every time..last time it was a blonde.
I hope that shows that looks aren't important ;P Also, now that I come to think of it, it seems like a scene straight out of a generic movie/anime...should I feel flattered my dreams follow movie styles and conventions? hahaah
I've just realized that the last couple of my posts have been romantic and deep, and that it has shown too much of my sentimental side. I'm sorry. I will endeavor to bring my topics back to lesbians and kinky sex. But I guess its ok considering there's not a lot of opportunity to show this side of me on the outside, unless someone wants to have a serious discussion of something, or want my advice on a matter. But its good that I get a chance to show another side...you never know who you may surprise ;) In fact, while I'm on this topic, I'm going to take everyone down a trip to memory lane.....*cue shimmering special effects*
Cor. Crazy Cor. To many, he is attributed to a fascination (some may see disturbingly so) for err..."Crazy Cor movies". While I knew Cor had a deep side (we have had many discussions on life and love), I never truly saw it expressed in any sort of creative form. And while I knew that there WAS ( or, more truthfully, is) a deep side, it was all too easy to dismiss him of having a creative, romantic side due to his abundance of "Crazy Cor movies". However, one night, last year, in a nameless mirc channel with Jo and myself, he....opened his heart. I was amazed. I was stunned. I KNEW he had a sentimental side, but I never thought he could express it in such poetic form. His thoughts on life and love, artfully sculpted into a poem, no not just a poem,a tale, that somehow invoked strong emotions inside of me that I have rarely felt reading anything. I knew, that for one shining moment, he had decided to let his barriers down....just once, but enough so that I could gain a new measure of him. I can't stress enough the impact it had on me. It is one thing to know something about someone, yet another to see it for yourself. When he had finished, I too felt the need to respond, to show him that his trust was not misplaced, and also on another level, to also show him that I too could show the creative side of me. So I listened to my heart, and let the words flow. Two poems, two minds.......one story. While our views were very different, I think we truly crafted something special that day, though I didn't realise it until after. Mores the pity too, because I never saved a copy of it.......however, from what I can remember, his portion at least, I think he could be a genius. But don't tell him I said that, lest he gets embarrassed, or at the more likely, quote it back to me some day. I will deny all.... ;) So the point of this story is, never ever think you know someone, because no matter what happens, they will always surprise you. Even if you think you know everything there is to know about a person, rest assured, there's always more........
Well, that's it for this, and probably next week...for those interested my timetable: Micro 16/6 ITF 17/6 BE 19/6 CA 20/6 Harry Potter 5 21/6 and Dad's B' day, 23/6........quite a week neh?
Oh yeah, too much sentimental stuff....here's some lesbians..... ;)
For those of you with exams, good luck!
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(3 Dead opinions | Where your opinions come to die)
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| Monday, June 9th, 2003
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11:05 pm - Reflections, Part II
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This is the second part of my short story entitled Reflections in the Garden, if you haven't read the first part, then I suggest you do so, unless you hate my writing. Which you probably do. Tough ;) I've got some thoughts I'd like to share, its about love, (prior warning again), but firstly without further ado;
continued.......
I sit back against my chair, speechless and stunned. He takes advantage of my shock to press on. "I am the honesty you deny. Remember instances where a person has asked you your opinion on their appearance, and you lied to them. On occasions where you have wanted something, or had a romantic interest in someone," He grins as he says this, while I continued to shake, "....that has been shared with someone else; you have relinquished your claim on it, despite your desire for it. Lastly, you deny yourself when you deny offers of something from someone, despite your interest in it. You are, my friend", his expression mocking, "....deception".
He smirks and sits back, awaiting my reaction, savoring the moment. I am silent as I ponder what he, or in a way, I, had said. To deny what we truly want, is that a lie? To be honest, to be truthful, to surrender to our needs and wants, is this the way we should live? Are our lives a lie? Do we deny who we really are? I closed my eyes, listening to my heart, the place where our conscience, our soul, resides. When I finally came to a decision, I opened my eyes, and smiled back at him. "While what you say may be true, you are right in that there are two sides to every story". He looks at me intently, slightly less sure of himself.
"You may call it denial, but I call it control".
I took a deep breath, and pressed on. "In the beginning when God created us, he not only gave us a body, but a soul. And it is this soul, this conscience, this willpower over ourselves, which sets us apart from the animals". He is angry now, his face frowned as I explain further.
"If we surrender to our base desires, are we not animals? To take what we want when we want it, to do something when we feel like it, why, this utter chaos is no better than the law of the jungle!" I am bolder now, more sure what I was saying was right.
"Perhaps you are right when you say I would be happier if I didn't deny myself as much as I do. However, there is a joy in self control. There is a certain kind of pleasure that can be gained from denial. For to exercise control over myself, to know that I am my own master, and servant to no other, is a reward in itself".
I lean forward, so close that our faces are almost touching. I continued again, in a low hoarse and earnest tone. "You are correct in that I have lied when asked an opinion. You are also correct in that I have denied myself something I desired because of another". I smile at him, increasing his discomfort further. "However, is it a crime to make someone happy? Is their appearance truly important compared to their self pride, their self esteem? Is my own desire more important than the friendships, nay, the love, that I share with my companions?" My voice is barely a whisper now. "And lastly, am I not a better person for having denied something that goes against my beliefs, which conflict with my code of morals?"
I abruptly lean back, and look a round the oasis.
"We were cast out long ago because we surrendered to desire. The price was Paradise........"
I stand up and begin walking away. Stopping just before the edge of the clearing, I turn back to look at him one last time. "It is a beautiful place you have here. However, like you, it is a deception, a shadow. My vindication is this; I will wake up in the real world, surrounded by the people I love, and who love me in return. You on the other hand, will be alone and unwanted, living in world without true joy".
His face contorted in a rage, he is speechless with fury, because he knows I am right, that I have seen through the veil of his deception. He makes no move to stop me as I walk out of the clearing, back out into the cold.
Yet, despite the cold, I am happy.
The End
Well, hope I didn't bore the crap out of you, but I just felt like posting something that I thought might interest some of you guys, a break from the usual "I did this and went here" post. Anyway, a quick little rambling about finding true love....
For some reason I remembered the end of FFIX today, and as I was remembering it, a thought struck me. What if the people we were destined to be with, the opposite piece of the jigsaw puzzle, in other words, our soul mate, was right under our nose this entire time. Let me explain firstly the process of thought between FF9 and this ramble. In the story, one of the main characters, Princess Garnet (I posted a pic of her before) is a Princess trying to unravel the strange behaviour of her mother the Queen and prevent a war between two nations, which in the process of doing so has a lot of adventures and saves the world etc etc. Anyway, early in the story, she meets up with the main character, Zidane and together they join forces to prevent the destruction of the world they live in. Throughout the story, it is clear the incorrigible Zidane has quite a romantic interest in Garnet (complete with killer lines), while she refuses to see him as nothing but friends or partners. However, at the very end, when Zidane is going off to do something extremely dangerous with little likelihood of returning, she finally cracks a little and makes him promise he'll comeback.
What I'm trying to get at here, is what if we have already found our one true love, our soul mate, the other side of our self that we are missing? What if he, or she, is right under our very nose? Under the guise of a friend,an acquaintance, workmate, or some other person we see regularly? And what if, deep down, we are denying it, afraid to take the chance, to grasp this opportunity and find true happiness? Only when we have lost something do we truly appreciate the value of what it is we have lost.....I think maybe instead of waiting and waiting until it is out of reach, we should grasp it at first opportunity, and never let go......
That's the thought of the day, I hope when you face a situation like this one you will remember my words, and act upon it.........after all, what can you lose?
UPDATE: Jap TATU clone
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(2 Dead opinions | Where your opinions come to die)
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