I ode to the world   
10:22pm 01/08/2004
mood: bouncy
music: Universal Traveler- Air
Well, I wrote some poem in a short span of about five minutes to be rated in a go-gaia forum. I liked the concept so I decided to post it here! I had no title for it, but I decided to call it Silence's Code. Fun. Woo.

When does the voice of wonder
First trace the mind's lips?
In the silence before dawn
Does it sleep soundly with you?
Or as the day leaves
Does the voice awaken and start weaving
All the dreams you dream while sleeping?
Ever present,
It never truly dissipates.
Only quiets as you wonder
Where it went.

o_O There you have it, folks. Tell me what you think or don't.


(Eat some bamboo)

Are you a hypnotist??????   
08:56pm 31/07/2004
mood: relieved
music: Bukowski- Modest Mouse
Individually typing each letter and stating the first two things that come to mind with it.
A- Art, Arithmatic
B- Balloon, Baptist
C- Cartoon, Candy
D- Dillusion, destroy
E- Enormous, Equity
F- False, Facade
G- Ginger, Gadget
H- Horrendous, Hypocrite
I- Illiterate, incapable
J- Justification, Joker
K- King, Kangaroo
L- Lily, Leopard
M- Modern, Malignant
N- Nonsense, nocturne
O- Opposite, opposition
P- Penelope, perfect
Q- Questionable, Quasi
R- Rectifying, Reality
S- Sensational, Sibilant
T- Tortoise, Telephone
U- Uranium, Urinary
V- Vigil, Vagrant
W- Walrus, well
X- Xenophobic, xylophone
Y- Yoyo, yep
Z- Zealous, zag

Sorry about the long haul without updates. You see, this journal was a replacement for those typical age old pencil paper things. I ran out of pages in my notebook, you see, and with nowhere to turn but into the public eye, I had no choice. A month or so back, I managed to buy one at a local Barnes and Nobles. Noble indeed! You have stockloads of paper! With words on them! Where else to turn when you need words on paper other than the place that sells them, eh?! And paper WITHOUT words too...just lines. If you catch my drift.


Anyway, exciting events happen in my life? Yes. Many. Several. A couple. A few. Detained. But I haven't the time to play a game of catch up. If you want that, go buy some Heinz.


But I did recently see the Village. Hell, I was scared. I don't know about the idiots in the crowded theatre who kept laughing at a blind girl try to run without falling over, but I was scared. Oh wait, they were also obnoxiously screaming when a red cloaked spikey guy walked by. And they were also obnoxiously screaming when a BIRD flew by. They truly ruined the movie for me. Truly. But I was still scared. Scared to the point of bringing a mace to the bathroom with me and showering with my eyes open regardless of soap sting? Hell yes.

People might have thought it was stupid but you know what, just because M. Night doesn't use constant gore and pop-out-of-a-box tactics and has some higher level plot twists and character developement doesn't mean you have to hate it because it's beyond you. Don't be hatin'. It was a good movie, even if it didn't scare you. I don't know why people don't like it. Maybe it is because they can't take a horror movie not based entirely around monsters? Did they not understand that the real fear was from people themselves? And not just mentally disabled people.


If you spend an inherited billion dollars to build a tiny village that nobody knows about with a couple of friends who have all been affected by the evils that the towns had to offer, what does that say? It says that the only REAL monsters in the movie are the people who commited the murderous crimes. Not red spikey pig things.

So there you have it. I guess people got to a horror movie and expect to be scared on the sight level. But M. Night went to the psychological, in depth level. Sure he used SOME boo tactics, which scared the shit out of me at one point, but they were subtle none the less and predictable though they could be, it doesn't make them any less freaky. Besides, just because you know there's a monster around the corner doesn't make it any less frightening when you see it. As a matter of fact, you would probably run away.

But enough about that. There's got to be something for me to--OH YES. I remember now! The source of all of my current stress! An assignment! But not just ANY assignment! A political assignment! A twelve chapter assignment! An assignment of proposterous levels that could be easily completed if it weren't for the BORING DRAWL IT IS COMPOSED OF. And as you can tell, I had a difficult time with it.

I'm almost done though. Only three more chapters to go. Three long grueling chapters of highlighting, outlining, summarizing, opinionizing, and establishizing. And you know what this book is called?? The ever exciting:

American Political Tradition: And The Men Who Made It.

Oh yeah. That's right. All capital title. That means it's important. So important that you are forced to do it, write a long essay on it, then forget about it as soon as you gain the college credit you can never apply. Oh the importance of reading this book is so intense that without the knowledge that Lincoln was truly an evil man and that Phillips should be given all of Lincoln's anti-slavery glory, I would surely explode. That's right. Explode.


And if you go down fighting, your name will be forever forgotten as "That guy who failed to complete an assignment he knew could never benefit him in the long run. Poor chap and his rebellious nature. Rebellious yet logical"

Since when am I man??

Sure, you could very well say I shouldn't have taken the course if I wasn't ever going to use the knowledge but then again, you could say we could drop the entiry history subject if we knew we never had to use it! So why don't we, folks? It's important to know the mistakes of the past in order to avoid repeating them, right?

Well then, let the politicians study politician mistakes, and I'll study my avant-garde, thank you very much! In case you haven't heard, Cleveland and all of Florida, I don't WANT to become a politician or historian or whatever the actual recording and relating of history applies to jobwise. I DON'T. So whyyyy make me go through pointless hours of torture and stress in order to complete something I may never, ever use again besides to line my birdcage with?? Mathematics, too! I don't need that! But at least I don't have to do summer BLEAH assignments!

Why do you make AP give you so many more credits and force little kids like me who normally wouldn't care to take you, evil course of absolute evil??!! Why?!?! Where do I go after I complete you?! EH? Can I drop history FOR EVER?! Because I'd like to! Seriously! I've had it with dealing with crap that stupid politicians did in the past that may affect the government I live in, which would then inadvertedly affect me, but you know what??? It affects me because it was all in the past. A past which I can not change. And I have no intention of getting an occupation that will allow me to change the future of this country politically. No intention at all. As a matter of fact, all I really want to do is write. Yes, write. But not about anything political. As a matter of fact, as far from politics as you can get.

I'm going to right scripts for movies. Yes. That's right. Not historical B-movies. Just...movies. Maybe a sitcom , a soap opera if ever I feel a bit angsty. Perhap a novel or two of happy joyous adventures, some magazine articles, the like.


And it's too late for me to turn back now. Not to mention it was either this course or a lower course that got me less credits. I want to graduate as quick as I can, damnit.

Ah yes. It feels good to rant like this. Again. Doing 9 out of 12 chapters really takes a toll on my feeble limbs. But now all of you can suffer my pain! You can all relate to my misery!

Everyone questions the school system at one point or another and for good reason, too.

In conclusion, I hope nobody's eyes are bleeding. Or maybe I do.



P.S Does anybody Go-Gaia? Because if you do, so do I. And we should both join forces to create the intellectual squad of vigilant decompressors. Or not.

(1 nibble | Eat some bamboo)

A point for me and you   
01:15am 10/07/2004
mood: relieved
music: Sometimes- My Bloody Valentine
I've been so inspired lately but with no subject to write upon. It's so nerve-racking to want to write so much, but have an empty brain that tells you, "Why don't you write on nothing? You seem to be doing it a lot lately." You stupid, cynical brain. And don't you dare start telling me that you are myself because myself is not a brain.

So, after several days of this torment, I decided just ten minutes ago to consult Iru on my plight.

Yume Waeru: Give me a subject to write about
antgemnstr: dreams.
antgemnstr: o.o
antgemnstr: I think they are so fascinating.
Yume Waeru: Okay...I'll write about dreams
Yume Waeru: A little story about dreams

Oddly enough, the first word of my AIM screen name MEANS dream in Japanese. And indeed, they are fascinating. So true to my word, I will write a little story about dreams.

Tiny Chok woke up one day to realize he had been dreaming. He was dreaming that he had awoken in his bed. Sadly, however, his bed was made of jello this time, floating in a giant sea made of ice cream.

"Oh what a pity." said Chok as he stepped off of his bed. Just as he was about to sink, a platform rose beneath his feet and he was lifted towards the heavens.

"What does this mean? Does it mean I'm dying?" he asked as he went higher and higher. Poor little boy, he is so used to being awake that he had forgotten what it was to dream and that just because the impossible happened doesn't mean it isn't life. You can dream in life, can't you? So he was left thinking of all the times in life he had as the platform rose when he suddenly spotted a cloud floating nearby.

"I don't want to die!" cried Chok and quickly jumped onto the cloud. He and the cloud watched the platform disappear in the blackness above.

"Phew, thank goodness I didn't keep riding it, or else I would have woken up." sighed Chok in relief. He didn't know what he was saying. The cloud nodded in agreement and floating on with a put-put sound that reminded Chok of a little toy helicopter.

Just then a little toy helicopter flew by.

"Wow, that's odd. I was just thinking about you." Chok said to the helicopter.

"I was thinking about you too." replied the helicopter.

"And I." put in the Tyranosaurus Rex.

"Oh this is wonderful! I hope we can all be awake together!" said Chok.

"Don't you know you're dreaming?" asked the cloud.

"I am?" said Chok, confused. This was a dream? But it seemed so nice and friendly. Not impossible. Dreams were always impossible. Is nice and friendly impossible?

"You are dreaming, little Chok." said the T-Rex. "This is impossible. I died a long time ago."

"But you are here, aren't you?" replied Chok.

"It's no use," said the helicopter. "He doesn't know it's impossible."

"Then it is possible!" said the cloud with a smile. What one doesn't know is impossible is still possible, right?

"That's the purpose of dreams, isn't it?" said Chok with a grin.

"Oh yes, that and a nice source of entertainment." said the T-Rex and he started hopping around in a bunny suit.

"I want a bunny suit!" demanded Chok. A second later, he was hopping around too.

"Uh oh." said the cloud, pointing up at the sky, which was brightening from tip to tip.

"Why uh oh?" asked Chok, looking at the pretty colors.

"It means this must end. Are you dreaming?" said the helicopter and he vanished.

"Huh?" asked Chok, but it was too late. He was awake in his regular bed.

Ah, that felt good. Not the best, but I managed to get some philosophical points in there. Always a fun point.


(Eat some bamboo)

Page Turner without the pages   
10:33pm 08/07/2004
mood: crazy
music: Woohoo-5678's
Only time for a short note:

Beware of anything exclusive to you because chances are, it's everyones'.


(Eat some bamboo)

Major Artillery   
07:42pm 07/07/2004
mood: amused
music: Jacqueline- Franz Ferdinand
Random boredom on palace resulted in associating people with two FF characters. They are as follows:

Ado- Sephius (Sephiroth+Rufus)
San- Tuna (Yuna+Tifa)
Iru- Vidane (Zidane+Vivi)
Me (Kit)- Freylu (Freya+Lulu)
Endy- Vinuall (Vincent+ Squall)
Noko- Garnrett (Garnet+Barrett)

o_o Yeap.


(Eat some bamboo)