Below are the most recent 11 friends' journal entries.

Tuesday, August 19th, 2008
blurtysecret [ omg_ur_a_fgt ]	7:43p	you'd think after the eighth girl i would learn. but crazy as it sounds, i think you're going to change just like i did every other time. i still love you. i miss you. although i know i shouldn't. (Comment on this)
Monday, August 18th, 2008
unsent [ justsignbythex ]	3:27a	enough to poke the little bruised spot on my heart and say "open your eyes." Dear Alex, The first time I saw you I caught myself wondering if I'd see you again. When Mary told me this guy kept coming around the store looking for me I sort of hoped it was the kid with the green eyes under the cute glasses from Friday. I'm sorry about what happened between us. I really did like you, I think you know that. I think you liked me too. You were fun to be around, til 5 am even. I loved falling asleep on the couch in your armpit watching Iron Chef. I loved what you said to me the first time you kissed me. I caught you looking at the side of my face and asked you what you were doing. And you said, "Trying to figure out how I want to kiss you." It was nice waking up in your bed, stuck to your stomach, naked. It was nice for the week that it lasted. We never made anything official. I'd never slept with someone after so short a time... ever. I asked you what we'd do when we ran out of movies and you replied, bluntly, with a cigarette bouncing on your lip, "We won't run out of movies." We didn't have to run out of movies. You ran out of feelings for me. And it was my fault. My stupid mouth. I guess I want to tell you that I felt this funny little pang of connectivity with you before I even knew your name. And I'm glad I met you. Roxanne Dear Sean, I have NEVER met another human being who can not only quote Spongebob, but who's favorite character is also the random "MY LEGGGGG" guy. You and I see eye to eye on almost everything. We talk constantly and in day or two we'll finally get to see one another... face to face. Right now you're out with that girl you seem to have fallen so hard for. You've known her for a week and as far as I've tried to talk you out of sleeping with her, I know you will anyhow. Your first time is probably happening right now. As I type this... with your week long crush. Now to the tough parts of this letter. You are naive, love. So naive. You're a hardheaded kid. You're a lot like me. And as much as I love how similar we are, I hate it all at the same time. I tried to convince you earlier that losing your virginity to this girl you've only just met, regardless of a "connection", is foolish beyond words. I can't make you see it. I've tried to convince you that she isn't really any different than any other girl you've had a crush on. I've tried to explain that love takes time. I've opened myself to you, told you about my past, my loves, my losses, my everything. All to keep you from the same. I don't want to see you make the same mistakes I did; you have become my best friend and I want to protect you, care for you. But... part of me wants to be in her place, maybe not right now, but later. I want room for it. That is strange coming from a woman like me. I've been all over the place, haven't I? I know all kinds of things. What I know more than anything though, is what it takes to make real love. And I think, as time goes by, as we spend more and more time together... that I might see myself falling into a funny place with you, awkward as you are. Your quirks, your connection to me and the way I am is enough to poke the little bruised spot on my heart and say "open your eyes." I don't want to see you grow so attached to this girl and forget that there's someone right in front of you too. Someone who will lay around with you, with no shoes on, drinking whiskey in the fall, eating grapes and quoting Spongebob, singing really old Radiohead songs, bitching about bad grammar. That's you and I. Me and the other part of me which has suddenly, rather quickly, deeply and entirely turned into you. Fondly and more so, Calamity Jane/ Kar Dear Emily, I don't even know who you are or what your face looks like but I really kind of wish you didn't exist because you're complicating everything for me. Dear Mal, I wish you would get help for your anorexia. You think no one knows... but we all know. Current Mood: cowardice. Current Music: After All, Sondre Lerche (Comment on this)
Sunday, August 17th, 2008
blurtysecret [ unodosthrice ]	1:30p	I'm seriously beginning to think that it's impossible for me to be happy. There's always something that gets me down. Always. (2 Comments |Comment on this)
ashnevra	1:15p	Fuck what I did was your fault somehow Fuck the presents, I threw all that shit out Fuck all the cryin' it didn't mean jack Well guess what yo, Fuck you right back (Comment on this)
blurtysecret [ shes_a_war ]	11:57a	i didn't know what i was getting myself into. i have no regrets. i'm glad i hate you. i wouldn't make it right between us if i could. but in a weird way i want to thank you. you helped me learn something about love and life. i'm still mad as hell and i can't even stand the thought of you... but thank you. (Comment on this)
Saturday, August 16th, 2008
blurtysecret [ justsignbythex ]	5:29a	(Comment on this)
Thursday, August 14th, 2008
blurtysecret [ justsignbythex ]	9:51p	why? I am never on this website anymore... But for some reason something weird is getting to me. Something REAL weird. I have a friend. We talk constantly, we have everything in common, we go to school together. He met some girl last week and he's completely infatuated with her. She likes him back, so on and so forth. And I'm the advice giver. He's never been in love, like I have. He's never been hurt like I have. I told him not to put all of the eggs in one basket and sit on it... because he doesn't really know how things are going to turn out. I told him long distance relationships end up hurting someone. I said that I wouldn't start a relationship before going to college. I'm right... right? The truth is... it just sounds like good advice. I think I don't want him to be with this girl, even if she is a good match for him, because I want to be the first person he loves. Not even that, maybe. I want to be a possibility. I want to be someone's infatuation too. Or maybe I just want someone to love me. I don't know. I'm horrible and selfish covered in the facade of a good friend. Current Mood: confused Current Music: Nine Black Alps (9 Comments |Comment on this)
Wednesday, August 13th, 2008
blurtysecret [ miniwheaterxo ]	11:14p	A letter to myself. You know. It sort of fucking hurts when you're left behind for something better.. especially when that something isnt all that superior to begin with. You're denied the feeling of freedom and happiness. Because you're too fucking worthless; you're too fucking dissapointing. Everything you do and say is meaningless. Repeated and practised a thousand times to sound pretty; To lie about the true hidden meaning. When the only real meaning is that you're so pathetic, You're so convinced that you hate your life that you refuse to look at what you have. You ignore the happiness and enhance the pain. Always explore the negativity and never do you once look up and smile just because you want to; not because you have to. You are miserable and hurt everyone around you. if youre so fucking miserable If you're so reluctant to change anything If life is so fucking horrible, then why do you even exist? (2 Comments |Comment on this)
Tuesday, August 12th, 2008
blurtysecret [ xenit ]	4:08p	so i lurk around here a lot, hardly ever post. i'm writing about a summer fling that just recently ended. I'm not totally done but I need the opinion of an outsider before I continue because I feel iffy about it. also, not a lot of my friends know that it even happened, so i plan on letting out a lot through this story. any help please? =] (3 Comments |Comment on this)
Saturday, August 9th, 2008
blurtysecret [ _ratedx_ ]	5:49a	No. The truth is you are just terribly short. I giggle. I giggle hard. Thanks for this laugh. Totally at your expense. HAHAHA. I hate a guy who is a jerk. I was jealous that you had a girlfriend, but I feel sorry for her. She deserves much better. If I had a guy who disrespected me like you have her, I'd wreck your ego and make you cry like the punk bitch you are. Current Mood: amused (Comment on this)
Friday, August 8th, 2008
blurtysecret [ mostlikelytolie ]	1:26p	I hate to say it, but my life has been much clearer since you died. My college experience had been shitty ever since your diagnosis, but now I can think clearly, I can stand to read/write for more than thirty seconds at a time, and I think I'm going to be okay. I miss you, and I wish you were in my life still, but having you only half here was killing me. I love you. I miss you. I wish you were here. But I'm going to survive. I'm going to make you proud. <3 your daughter. (1 Comment |Comment on this)