Saturday, May 3rd, 2003
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10:56 am
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you're "a perfect sonnet". you are still
searching for someone that's perfect for you,
and until you find that person you wish
horrible, horrible things would happen to
everyone that's in love.
which bright eyes' song are you?
brought to you by Quizilla
La.<33 How much I love Bright Eyes. It's scary.
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(End My Suicidal Dreams)
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Saturday, April 26th, 2003
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9:12 am - :D
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Thursday, April 24th, 2003
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4:49 pm - Hi
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I'm at my dad's work. I have been all day. It was a way to get out of school... you know that take your kid to work day shit. But it works. School makes me depressed so I try my best to avoid it. I'm missing a lot of school tomorrow, too. I'm going to be so behind, but for some reason I don't really give a shit. Because if I did I wouldn't have come here today. But I know I'm going to start worrying when I realize that my grades have dropped. I can't stand to have bad grades... it hurts to see it. Because I feel like I'll have no future if I don't work hard enough. I'll just be some bum who can't get into college or some shit like that. But whatever. I don't think education should be the most important thing in life.. but happiness. And I don't really have that either. So what am I here for?
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(End My Suicidal Dreams)
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Wednesday, April 23rd, 2003
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10:20 pm - Bleh.
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Tuesday, April 22nd, 2003
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4:28 pm - :/
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I don't think he realizes how strong my feelings are for him... I just wish he would talk to me more. I feel like he's hiding something from me because he can't tell me things. I just want for him to be happy. And I just want to be happy. But nothing ever works out that way.
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(1 increased the pain | End My Suicidal Dreams)
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Sunday, April 20th, 2003
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10:43 pm - :D
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HAPPY EASTER FROM THE JEW!!!!!
I was in DC today and there were so many Jews. I guess that's how you can tell when Easter is here, hm? I hope all of you Easter celebraters had a good day. School tomorrow... death. I'm going to cry from the moment I get there til the moment I leave. Gah.
<33
Alyson
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(End My Suicidal Dreams)
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Saturday, April 19th, 2003
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10:48 pm - Hi
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I don't know what to say but I have to update.
Oh yeah so I'm grounded from AOL for being notified twice and I think it was Sean. He's a dead man, that kid. My mom doesn't know for how long so... for now I'm just going to be getting on my friend Ellen's screen name because she rocks. Yes, that is all.
I love Hayden. ;x
<33
Alyson
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(End My Suicidal Dreams)
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12:55 am - Hm
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Thursday, April 17th, 2003
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8:55 pm - :D
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11:29 am - Yeah
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I guess I should update this thing :/
Laaa. So I got a new dog yesterday. She's really cute I'll post pictures later. She looks kind of like a fox, it's frightening. I wanted to name her Atticus but my mom got bitchy like usual and said "WAHH IT'S A BOYS NAME." So I named her Amber. Like? Good. I feel bad for my other dog though because she feels like she's not the center of attention anymore. She's been moping around the house like an old woman. :/
So last night was Passover. I went to my grandma's house. Came home crying more than ever and feeling like shit. Why? Because my family hates me and it took me this long to realize it. So we're just eating and my brother feels the need to mention that I'm "online too much." They go on about how I don't have a life and I'm a brat. And of course I'm allowed to defend myself right? So I called my brother an asshole. My dad yells at me for cussing in front of my grandparents and I get grounded from going to Six Flags on Sunday with my camp friends. I NEVER get to see my camp friends! I miss them so much, and I know I saw them last week but still. :/ I won't see them for awhile. BLah. I hate my life. I don't have friends and now that I know my family hates me.. well.. yay!
Hmm. So I'm eating my matzah right now. It's pretty damn good. I love passover... but last night was kind of the worst passover in the world. Oh yeah and since I love my online friends soo much, I decided to make bracelets for them. Yeah. I'm going to send them in the mail. It makes me feel cool. So if any of you want me to make you a special Alyson home-made bracelet... send me an email with 5 colors that you want and your address and it will be on its way! My e-mail address is OurLadyShalom@aol.com. :D I'm going to go make some moreee...
<33
Alyson
And if you notice that this entry is the same as the one on Live Journal. Yeah I know. I'm way too lazy for two of these... let alone even one.
current mood:  crappy
current music: GRETYJWEIOTJWOI!!!!
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(End My Suicidal Dreams)
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Monday, April 14th, 2003
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9:54 pm - rtjopiaejoiae
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AHHHHHHH.
I hate finding out that all my friends are potheads. IT SUCKS. I thought I could count on my friends. But this... this sucks. At least I'm still straightedge. And I hope I always am because I'm not ready to throw my life away for some killer that they call drugs.
<33
Alyson...
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(End My Suicidal Dreams)
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Saturday, April 12th, 2003
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11:19 am - Well hello there.
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Uhm. I have nothing to say but I was bored. We went out for my cousins 9th birthday last night. :D It was... okay. I was yelling at my mom the whole night for no reason whatsoever Wait I had a reason: for fun. Lol. I'm so mean to her... ;x Anyway. So yeah we went out to Chinese and it rizzocked cuz Chinese is the best food there is. That's basically all I have to say. Well I'm going to a camp party today-tomorrow. Starting at 3:00 today to whenever tomorrow. CO-ED SLEEPOVER! Haha jk. It should be fun. But I feel kind of bad for not getting them presents. See Leah and I were going to make chocolate chip muffins for them but this morning Leah said she was going out to get them presents. And now I feel bad cuz I didn't do thatttt! Muffins are good enough right? I mean who can't resist some great homemade muffins. I couldn't... but that's because I'm fat and I love food haha. Well I just hope I at least have fun. Because every time I go to CAMP I feel like shit when I come home. KInd of because my friends make me feel worthless but this is only one night. So I guess I'll just...... go now.
Oh yeah my parents and I are going to the pound at 12:00 to see the puppiesss. Since my dog died a few weeks ago we are thinking about getting another one. And I want to name it Atticus, hehe. I think that name is so cute. So yeah I'll tell you how everything goes when I get home tomorrow or so. Wee. Bye!
<33
Alyson
current mood: guilty
current music: My Chemical Romance :x: Skylines
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(End My Suicidal Dreams)
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Thursday, April 10th, 2003
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10:27 pm - Yizzo.
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Hi!
I am about to go to sleep.
Just thought I'd post first. Just for shits and giggles.
You kno what I be saying dawggg?
Hm. So tomorrow is my cousin's birthday and we are all going out for Chinese food. YEAH I SAID CHINESE!!!! OMG YAY! Best food in the world. Besides desserts of every kind. That's what gave me this belly right here. -holds chub- Mmmmmmmmm. Hot.
Ok well I LOVE YOU ALL. Does anyone have a good site for uploading picture on? If so let me know! Wow that rhymes. Wizzle bizzle. Goodnight<33333
<33
Alyson
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(4 increased the pain | End My Suicidal Dreams)
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3:40 pm - erjeilaje
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I'm bored. And I have a drum lesson tonight. Damn. Haven't practiced once this week...
Am I losing interest or am I just a lazy piece of shit??
<33
Alyson
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(End My Suicidal Dreams)
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Wednesday, April 9th, 2003
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3:06 pm - Eeeeeee!
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Sunday, April 6th, 2003
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2:08 pm - Wee.
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I had a pretty fun weekend and now I'm tired as shit. I look as though I fell off of a cliff. I come home and my mom is like "What the hell happened to you.. did you sleep??" I'm like uhh yeah almost 9 hours..."
So Sara's bat mitzvah was this weekend. Sara is my friend Shayna's little sister. They are camp friends.. hooray for that. So Friday night Maytal, Alyssia, and Leah were going to sleep over because I was taking them to the service in the morning. But Alex, Alyssia's boyfriend, went over to Leah's house and wasn't leaving until 1:00 in the morning. So when Maytal got here we went over to Leah's house and hung out but my dad made me come home at like 11:00 and was bitching at me about Leah coming over at 1:00 so we just picked her and Alyssia up in the morning. Alex is really cool.. and hot. Wow for jealousy.
So we went to the service in the morning and it was at this Elementary school. After Shayna did her torah portion Leah, Maytal, and I walked around the school. We went into all of the classrooms and stole the teachers' candy. ;x It was so fun. It was just like trick-or-treating!! We got so much shit... I almost felt bad. But not. Lol it was pretty funny though.
So then we went back to Shayna's, hung out, I fell asleep for awhile because knowing me I'm always tired. Then we went to the party. I got to meet Shayna's boyfriend too!!! Wow two in one! He's really nice and.. open about being 'special.' Haha he's liek dislexic and has a bad memory so he goes to some special school in DC. He was cool though. I had a fun time especially because all I did was sit there and do what I do best.. eat. We got these really cool picture frame things shaped as a ferris wheel. It goes around and around and around and a-- ::drops::
The brunch was this afternoon and I ate so much that I wanted to throw up. I hate the fact that I'm madly in love with food lol. That's why I'm so chubbyyyyyy. LOOK -points to chub- Okay so yeah now I'm home and I have all of this homework and BLAH I don't want to do it. I have a paper due Wednesday which I haven't started. Hm.. Maybe I'll take a nap first. I can't believe I wrote so much in here haha, that is quite scary.
<33
Alyson
current mood:  tired
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(End My Suicidal Dreams)
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Friday, April 4th, 2003
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4:32 pm - holy shit
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Thursday, April 3rd, 2003
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4:48 pm - Hm
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I'm not sure what kind of mood I'm in. But I'm pretty sure about having a crush on someone. And I hate crushes more than life itself. I think that he likes me too, but nothing can really happen with us. So I'm happy and pissed off at the same time. I don't know what to think. I'm tired of thinking. All it does it torture me... but. Ah I don't know. I'm not in the best mood. That is all.
current mood: worried
current music: Taking Back Sunday- Bike Scene.
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(End My Suicidal Dreams)
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Wednesday, April 2nd, 2003
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1:36 pm - my conversations with Samantha
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OrAnGe Xx fLaMe: make a blurty and put it in haha
OrAnGe Xx fLaMe: you should have a journal
OrAnGe Xx fLaMe: hey you posted on leahs journal but you never post on mine
ShOrtShErbErt99: ok blurty rminds me of fartig
OrAnGe Xx fLaMe: loser
ShOrtShErbErt99: farting **
OrAnGe Xx fLaMe: farting????
OrAnGe Xx fLaMe: wtf
OrAnGe Xx fLaMe: haha
ShOrtShErbErt99: cuz its like blurt blurt
OrAnGe Xx fLaMe: ew
OrAnGe Xx fLaMe: samantha
OrAnGe Xx fLaMe: please
ShOrtShErbErt99: whats that thing with soceity that you said to me
OrAnGe Xx fLaMe: conforming to society
ShOrtShErbErt99: ooh conforming
OrAnGe Xx fLaMe: hahaha
OrAnGe Xx fLaMe: are yo ulooking it up or something
ShOrtShErbErt99: no im typing it
OrAnGe Xx fLaMe: oo to who
ShOrtShErbErt99: you
ShOrtShErbErt99: on your farty
yrhjroejtoaie HAHAHA.
current mood:  amused
current music: sorry about dresdeni hear baltimore is nice
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(End My Suicidal Dreams)
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12:59 pm - again!
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ShOrtShErbErt99: im listening to stitcher
ShOrtShErbErt99: haha stitches**
ShOrtShErbErt99: there we go
OrAnGe Xx fLaMe: OH
OrAnGe Xx fLaMe: best song ever!
ShOrtShErbErt99: yeah its pretty good
ShOrtShErbErt99: on the hole
OrAnGe Xx fLaMe: by orgy?
OrAnGe Xx fLaMe: or are you talking about preparation H
OrAnGe Xx fLaMe: lol
ShOrtShErbErt99: no by three some
HAHAHA. My god she's on a roll today!
current mood:  bouncy
current music: bright eyes bowl of oranges!!!
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(End My Suicidal Dreams)
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