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[15 Jul 2004|01:07pm] |
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mood |
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 happy |
] |
sammys coming over tomorrow!!!!!!!!! yay!!!!!!!!!!!!!
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[14 Jul 2004|08:16pm] |
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mood |
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 naughty |
] |
hehe ^__^
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[07 Jul 2004|01:42pm] |
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mood |
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 bored |
] |
boredness....
rules:
If you like a band on my list, bold it. If you've never heard of a band on my list, underline it. And if there is any that you REALLY hate or just dislike to a certain extent, make it italic.
01. Abandoned Pools
02. AFIM
03. Alkaline Trio
04. All American Rejects
05. Autopilot Off
06. Avenged Sevenfold
07. Azure Ray
08. Billy Talent
09. Blink-182
10. Bowling for Soup
11. Brand New
12. Bright Eyes
13. Britney Spears
14. CKY
15. Coheed and Cambria
16. Cold
17. Count the Stars
18. Cursive
19. Deftones
20. Desaparecidos
21. Die Trying
22. Element Eighty
23. Eternal Decision
24. Evanescence
25. Eve 6
26. Fall Out Boy
27. Fiction Plane
28. Finch
29. Foo Fighters
30. Forever the Way
31. From Autumn To Ashes
32. Good Charlotte
33. Green Day
34. Hot Hot Heat
35. Incubus
36. Jimmy Eat World
37. Jimmy Hendrix
38. Kill Hannah
39. Led Zeppelin
40. Less Than Jake
41. Letter Kills
42. Linkin Park
43. Live
44. Lostprophets
45. Matchbox Twenty
46. Mest
47. Mobb Deep
48. Moments in Grace
49. MXPX
50. New Found Glory
51. Nickelback
52. Nirvana
53. No Doubt
54. Our Lady Peace
55. P.O.D.
56. Papa Roach
57. Pennywise
58. Piebald
59. Pink Floyd
60. Placebo
61. Poison the Well
62. Puddle of Mudd
63. Queen
64. Rainer Maria
65. Ramones
66. Rancid
67. Red Hot Chili Peppers
68. Reel Big Fish
69. Rilo Kiley
70. Rufio
71. Scatter the Ashes
72. Senses Fail
73. SEV
74. Simple Plan
75. Smashing Pumpkins
76. Smile Empty Soul
77. Staind
78. Static-X
79. Straylight Run
80. Sugar Ray
81. Sum 41
82. System of a Down
83. The Ataris
84. The Bronx
85. The Distillers
86. The Donnas
87. The Mars Volta
88. The Postal Service
89. The White Stripes
90. Three Days Grace
91. Thrice
92. Thursday
93. Tiger Army
94. Transplants
95. Trapt
96. Unwritten Law
97. Vendetta Red
98. Vertical Horizon
99. Yeah Yeah Yeahs
100. Yellowcard
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[06 Jul 2004|09:13pm] |
| [ |
mood |
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 lethargic |
] |
| [ |
music |
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Drive Through Invasion Tour compilation |
] |
wow i havent updated in forever! well vacation in VA was errite..just on sunday it was raining on and off all day when we were in D.C so we left 'early'..we kept trying to leave but my aunt kept dragging us around to memorial things so we didnt really get back to springfield [va] till about 9.30. its exhausting trying to understand my aunt cos it sounds like shes speaking a mixture of english and korean and my uncle wasnt around to translate for us. shes lived in the US for about 25 years, youd think shed have learned to speak english properly by now. just my uncle n aunt live in like a korean community [cos there korean-obviously] so there constantly speaking korean..omfg i went to church with them which was quite an experience i must say..most of the usual church members were on a retreat thing [my uncle says a whole bunch of people go away to some retreat place every july 4th] so there was another pastor who was kinda kewl but then he had a guest "Caucasian" pastor who had a really crap sermon that went on for about a million years about some woman who was pouring her sins onto Jesus with perfume instead of pouring oil on his head when he visited her or something like that..i lost interest within like the first 2 minutes..on the way home on monday we stopped at a rest stop to get suttin to drink at starbucks n it was really really crowded n noisey there so when my mom was ordering the things she had to tell the woman at the counter her name n she said "Dot" and even spelled it out for her n the lady gave her a weird look n when we got our drinks the lady giving them out was like "Carmel frap for...God?!" n on all the cups said God on them lmao ..tres tres amusant.. today my mother dragged me n my sisters to kohls n some other places to go 'shopping' n i got a shirt that says 'yer fired!' n some shorts that came with a thong [?] n penguin pants!!!!! ..then we got home n the Loonleader [my grandfather] came over for dinner. gahh im so tired now..i think im sick..i dont feel like going upstairs to my room though-im too lazy..oh well..
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[25 Jun 2004|04:03pm] |
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mood |
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 amused |
] |
this weeks been pretty boring..on monday me n sam went to the school to see joey n he came back to my house for a lil while..i wont go into detail heheh
tuesday i saw Saved with kiah, caroline n madison n then went to the mall..juss walked around town with jenna on wednesday n yesterday i went to target with jenna n caroline then went to jennas house..not really doing anything today..later im going to dads till tomorrow afternoon then going to a party with my mom. sammys prolly gonna be there so it wont be that bad ^.^
whoa all the sudden it started raining..weird..
heres some quiz thingys i took! yay!!!
I AM 66% EMO!  Well.. I've made the cut! Now I'll go buy some promise rings and knit myself a sweater. |
I AM 70% ASSHOLE/BITCH!  I am abrasive, some people really hate me, but there may be a group of other tight knit assholes and bitches that I can hang out with and get me. Everybody else? Fuck ‘em. |
Innocent
What's your sexual appeal?
brought to you by Quizilla
schizoid
Which Personality Disorder Do You Have?
brought to you by Quizilla
yes i kno i have too much time on my hands..i could be using it to work on the layout but i gave up a while ago cos like half of the codes arent working!!! gah!
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[20 Jun 2004|09:03pm] |
| [ |
mood |
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 crazy |
] |
good weekend..highlights:
kiahs party: morgan stole a napkin from house of wong! lmao saw Stepford Wives which was odd and kind of boring actually..caroline couldnt come to the beach but morgan, kiah, jenna, n me went n we took lots of pictures of our sexy selves ^.~
after kiahs party me n sam hung out n my mom n ed n ellen n greg were making martinis n me n sam wanted some but they wouldnt give us any..then joey called n i thought i really screwed things up with me n him on friday but he wasnt mad yay! anyway me n sam walked to his house n we talked for a while n then we left cos it was getting all dark..then we made turkey burgers n mine was all undercooked but thats ok n i had a shot of that flavored vodka crao n it was reeeaally nasty n i like screamed cos it was like burning my mouth lol ..sam n her family slept over cos everyone was drunk lol but me n sam didnt go to sleep till like 3.30 n her mom n dad woke us up at about 10.45 this morning cos they were leaving =[ but sams coming over again tomorrow n were gonna wander round town being retards like we did all last summer ^.^ funfun
today i didnt really do anything..watched meet the parents with my mom n then went to dinner with aunt susan n grampa n the waiter guy hit me in the head with a plate! lmao i was cracking up n he was like "im so sorry im sorry" haha when he left my mom was like 'jess you should have made a scene..there goes our lawsuit!' lmfao
:: BASICS ::
01. Full Birth Name: Jessica Nicole Forgacs
02. Hair Color: brown..i juss died it like dark red but it washed out! =[
03. Eye Color: brown
04. Height Currently: im not sure..
05. Glasses/Contacts: glasses (sammy says there sexy! hehe)
06. Birthdate: january 16th
07. Sign: capricorn
08. Current Age: 13
09. Siblings: 2 sisters, christina and rachel
10. Sibling's Age: 10 and 9 i think
11. Location: sexy new jersey hehe
12. Any Piercings: yep i have my ears pierced twice but i want my ears pierced more and my tongue n my belly button pierced and i dont feel like listing everything else! I JUSS WANT EVERYTHING PEIRCED!!
:: SOCIAL LIFE ::
01. Best Friends: sammy, morgan, caroline, kiah
02. Boyfriend/Girlfriend: joey
03. Current Crush: does joey count?
04. Hobbies: umm...
05. Timely Or Always Late: im usually late
06. Do You Have A Job: not at the moment
07. Do You Like Being Around People: only my few friends
:: STUFF ::
01. Have you ever liked someone you had no chance with: doesnt everyone?
02. Have You Ever Cried Over Someone of the Opposite Sex: yea but im over it now
03. Is There A Certain "Type" Of Person U Go After: umm..no i dont think so
04. Want Someone You Don't Have Right Now: not really..
05. Ever Afraid You'll Never Get Married: i thought about it once..
06. Do You Want Kids: sure i guess
01. Room In house: my room
02. Type of music: rock
03. Song: too many
04. Memory: in atlantic city at Brigantine with sammy n we were on tha beach all day n then we went at night at like 12 n dug a big hole n put candles in it n we all had glow sticks!!!!!!!!!! yay!
05. Day of the Week: friday or saturday
06. Color: hot pink n black the sexiest colors ever!!
07. Flower: calla lilies
08. Month: January hehe
09. Season: autumn
:: IN THE LAST 48 HOURS, HAVE YOU ::
01. Cried: suprisingly no
02. Bought Something: yea prolly
03. Gotten Sick: almost
04. Sang: yea
05. Said I Love You: um no i dont think so..
06. Wanted to Tell Someone You Loved them, But Didn't: yes
07. Met Someone New: nope
08. Moved On: im over it already
09. Talked To Someone: of course
10. Had A Serious Talk: nope
11. Missed Someone: yes
12. Hugged Someone: yeaa!!
13. Kissed Someone: i dont think so..
14. Fought With Your Parents: of course
15. Dreamed About Someone You Can't Be With: nope
16. Had a lot of sleep: no ive gotten like no sleep this weekend..
17. Wanted This Survey to Be Over: naw i dont have anything else to do
:: THIS OR THAT ::
[Coke or Pepsi]: coke
[Flowers or Candy]: either
[Scruff or Clean Shaven]: .. clean shave? i guess
:: WHO ::
[Makes you laugh the most?]: sammy prolly
[Makes you smile]: joey, morgan, sam, caroline, kiah
[Gives you a *good* funny feeling when you see them]: ;P
[Has a crush on u?]: dunno
[Easier to talk to: boys or girls?]: girls
:: DO YOU EVER ::
[Sit on the internet all day waiting for someone special to I.M. you?]: rarely
[Save AOL/AIM conversations]: yea
[Wish you were living someone else's life]: dunno
:: HAVE YOU EVER ::
[Cried because of someone saying something to you]: yes
[Fallen for your best friend]: yea..=\\
[Been rejected]: sure
[Rejected someone]: yea lmao it was funny
[Used someone]: not necessarily
[Been cheated on]: yea
[Done something you regret]: yes
:: WHO WAS THE LAST PERSON ::
[you talked to on the phone?]: morgan
[you Hugged]: sam
[You instant messaged]: alex i think cos she IMed me
[You laughed with]: sammy or morgan i forget which
:: DO YOU ::
[Color your hair]: yea
[Ever get off the damn computer]: when my mom yells at me to get my ass off the comp
[Parlez Francais?]: oui un petit?
:: HAVE YOU / DO YOU / ARE YOU ::
[Smoke]: nope
[Obsessive]: sometimes
[Could you live without the computer?]: never!
[How many people are on your buddylist?]: dunno
[What's your favorite food?]: bagels (lmao jenna 'i never get tired of them' haha)
[What's your favorite fruit?]: cherries!!!
[Drink alcohol?]: yea sometimes lmao last night i had a shot of absolut kurant flavored vodka from when my mom n ed n ellen n greg were making martinis cos it smelled really good but it was so nasty! it was like burning my throat i almost puked lmao
[Like watching sunrises or sunset]: yea n there best at the beach
[What hurts the most? Physical pain or Emotional pain?]: emotional pain
[Trust others way too easily]: no i hardly trust anyone
:: FINAL QUESTIONS ::
[I want]: i dunno..
[I wish]: life was easier
[I love]: my friends (dont feel like naming them all)
[I miss]: everyone
[I fear]: losing my best friends
[I hear]: my mom talking to my sister
[I wonder]: if sammy can sleep over tomorrow ::ponders::
[How do you know its love?]: i dont
:: HAVE YOU EVER ::
1. Been in jail: not really
2. Done drugs: yea..
3. Run away from home: yes
4. Hit a girl: yea i hit morgan n sammy all the time hah ^.~
5. Lied: yes ive been doing that a lot lately but i feel real guilty about it later
6. Stolen anything: yes
7. Broken a bone: nope
8. Cheated on a test: not recently
9. Gotten drunk: yep
10. Been with two girls/guys at once: ive been with a girl n a guy.. hehe
11. Been in the hospital: yea in second grade i was there for like 2 weeks n last year to visit my gramma
12. Let a friend cry on your shoulder: yes
13. Fell asleep in the shower/bath: yea i almost did this morning hehe
14. Gone to church: yea i used to all the time but i think the last time i did was for my grammas funeral..
15. Never slept during a night: yes
16. Ever been on a motorcycle or motorbike: yup
17. Been to a camp: yea
18. Sat in a restaurant w/o ordering: yep
19. Seen someone die: no
20. Gone a week w/o shaving: yea only cos my mom wouldnt buy me more razors
21. Didn't wash your hair for a week: i dont think so..
22. Thought you were in love: yes
23. Streaked the streets: ...
24. Screamed at someone for no reason: hah all the time!
25. Said I love you and meant it: yes
26. Stayed up till 4 am on the phone: yep with sammy! hehe
props to sammy ^.^
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[16 Jun 2004|03:56pm] |
welp today was errite i spose..didnt really do anything all day..
sam invited me to go to stephens grad party on friday with her but thats the same day as kiahs party and kiah asked me to go to her party a lo0ng time ago but i dunno whose party im gonna go to cos i really want to go to both! im gonna try to find a way to be at both then.
survey thing..
10 songs you love: good riddance by greenday, elevator by boxcar racer, my favorite accident by motion city soundtrack, this could be love by alkaline trio, spitting games by snow patrol, the taste of ink by the used, love is paranoid by the distillers, screaming infidelities by dashboard confessional, reptilia by the strokes, bouncing off the wall by sugarcult
9 things that make you smile: my friends, joey, my sisters when there not being retards, pictures, seeing people i havent seen in a long time, corny jokes, looking through my old things, going to the beach, the first snow of winter
8 things you wear daily: well clothes obviously, my necklace with the guitar and moon on it, joeys necklace, my watch, glasses, earrings, blue bracelets, black bracelets
7 things that annoy you: judgemental people, labels, teachers who are stupider than me, the fact that my mom wont get me more minutes for my cell phone till i get my report card, my sisters, living so far away from my dear friend sammy, people who dont speak there mind (even though i do that all the time)
6 things you are looking forward to: summer vacation, kiahs birthday party, stephens grad party, summer solstice, seeing katie again this summer, meeting garret and stephen with sam
5 things you are scared of: spiders, heights, small spaces, being totally and completely alone, being with too many people at one time
4 people you talk to daily: caroline, morgan, kiah, joey? i guess..i kinda talk to a lot of people
3 foods you could live off of: mountain dew livewire, ramen, mystic pizza (lmao sammy)
2 unforgettable moments: NUMBER 1: in atlantic city with sammy at the beach at 12am NUMBER 2: at baskin robins getting the cake for kiahs birthday when the lady couldnt figure out what we were trying to get written on the cake
1 person you could spend the rest of your life with: im not sure..
¤ why do you build me up [build me up] buttercup baby just to let me down [let me down] mess me around ¤
gahh..
im reading yer note over again
theres not a word that i comprehend
except when you signed it
''ill love you always and forever''
well as for now im gonna hear the saddest songs
and sit alone and wonder how yer making out
but as for me i wish that i was anywhere with anyone
making out
im missing yer laugh
how did it break?
and when did yer eyes begin to look fake?
i hope yer as happy as yer pretending..
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[15 Jun 2004|05:09pm] |
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mood |
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bored |
] |
attempted to make a new layout thingy..didnt come out really the way i wanted to cos like half my codes arent working =[
well heres a survey thing i "borrowed" from Kathleens xanga
juss do it dammit!! teehee ^.~
01. who are you and what's our relationship?:
02. how and where did we meet?:
03. what's my middle name?:
04. how long have you known me?:
05. what was your first impression of me?:
06. whats my age?:
07. whens my birthday?:
08. whats one of my favorite band/groups at the moment?:
09. what color are my eyes?:
10. do i have any siblings?:
11. when you first saw me, did you think we could have been friends?
12. do you remember one of the 1st things I said to you? if so what was it:
13. describe me in 3 words:
14. what are some things i love?:
15. tell me one thing you've always wanted to say to me but never did:
16: what do you like most about me:
17: if we could spend a day together what would we do?:
18: have we ever gotten in a fight?:
19: do you think we will be friends for at least 3 or 4 more years?:
20. Give me a nickname and explain why you picked it:
21. What do you think my weakness is?:
22. Do you think I'll ever get married?:
23. What reminds you of me?:
24. If you could give me anything what would it be?:
25. When's the last time you saw me?:
26. Do you think our friendship is getting stronger/weaker/or staying the same?:
27. Do you feel that you could talk to me about anything and I would listen?:
28. Are you going to put this on your journal and see what I say about you?:
29. If I was an ice cream flavor, which would I be and why?:
30. If you could change one thing about me, what would it be?:
31. if you could spend an entire summer with me would you do it?:
32. Do I cross your mind at least 1 time a day?:
thanks ^.^
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[14 Jun 2004|08:22am] |
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happy birthday to kiah!
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[10 Jun 2004|08:52pm] |
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mood |
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 ditzy |
] |
feeling muUuch better cos pretty much everything that was screwed up is worked out so im happy about that n yesterday chloe comes up to me n she said like shes sorry bout what she said n she didnt mean it the way it sounded n said some crap about the dance thingy n im juss like wtf i kno this but it was good of her to apologise so..w.e
only 5 more days of school left! omg i cant believe how fast this year went by!!
sammys practically saved my life I LOVE YOU SAMMY!! were prolly gonna have parties for the summer solstice (6/21) and the blue moon (7/31) cos shes gonna be in somerville with her grampa on the 21st yay!!! so thats gonna be wicked awesome cos we have so much fun n it sucks how we like never see each other its been like 2 months since the last time i saw her!!
YeaAa DeaTh Sex: heres a lil groundhog furry and brown hes coming up up to look around if he sees his shadow down hell go then six more weeks of winter OH NO!
YeaAa DeaTh Sex: we're s p a c e y
hellz yea she knows how it is! ^.~
wow im retarded
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[07 Jun 2004|04:23pm] |
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mood |
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 pissed off |
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gahh this is so fucked up what the hell is chloe talking about that i wont admit hes going with her to the fucking dance thing till joey tells me?! she doesnt know shit!-ill admit it right now JOEYS GOING TO THE DANCE THING WITH CHLOE ON FRIDAY! there! i dont give a flying fuck about it either! i just wanted joey to tell me is that really so much to ask but now theres no point in it and i couldnt really care less at this point everythings so fucked up now aaghh fuck it
and a note to all of you dumbasses who i wont say yer names i kno a hell of a lot more than you might think
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[05 Jun 2004|10:23pm] |
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mood |
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 cold |
] |
today sucked as usual..went shopping with my mom n then went to see harry potter..i was sposed to see it yesterday but the stupid bitches sold it out. well i invited joey along n he couldnt come. if he didnt want to come with me he should have just said so. anyways i called like all my other friends (which is only about 4 people..heh) cos i dont really like going to movies with just my family and no one else could come so i was all depressed..but the movie was pretty good (even though the book was better)
i dont kno why im bothering with some of my relationships (i wont mention names..) because i just feel like i cant trust this one person when there with other people and when im not around (again i wont mention names). also when someone decides to start a relationship, they should make a conscience effort to continue it and keep it interesting. especially when we are in a situation where it might be a bit difficult for our relationship to exsist the way it is in the future.
all i want is fucking honesty, is that really too much to ask? i wont be too mad about things as long as people tell me the truth and its not like i wont find out if people are lying to me. im not completely stupid and i have my ways to find out about things that happen when im not around.
i cannot fucking stand it anymore
im falling apart everything is just fucking falling apart and i just cant take it anymore!
my life just sucks in general. i hate not feeling like i can trust anyone and i dont kno if im just being paranoid or if people are really not worthy of my trust
i want to just end it right now
im about to fucking do it
im going to finally cut to end it all
it would be best for everyone, right?
i will no longer be a burden to anyone
just a weight on all of your shoulders
keeping you down
everyone will be free if i was gone..wouldnt everyone be so much happier?
1. The human consciousness that originates in the brain and is manifested especially in thought, perception, emotion, will, memory, and imagination.
2. The collective conscious and unconscious processes in a sentient organism that direct and influence mental and physical behavior.
3. The principle of intelligence; the spirit of consciousness regarded as an aspect of reality.
4. The faculty of thinking, reasoning, and applying knowledge: Follow your mind, not your heart.
5. A person of great mental ability: the great minds of the century.
6. a. Individual consciousness, memory, or recollection: I'll bear the problem in mind.
b. A person or group that embodies certain mental qualities: the medical mind; the public mind.
c. The thought processes characteristic of a person or group; psychological makeup: the criminal mind.
7. Opinion or sentiment: He changed his mind when he heard all the facts.
8. Desire or inclination: She had a mind to spend her vacation in the desert.
9. Focus of thought; attention: I can't keep my mind on work.
10. A healthy mental state; sanity: losing one's mind.
hmm...
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[04 Jun 2004|06:21pm] |
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mood |
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 thoughtful |
] |
this week sucked pretty bad..felt like shit almost the whole time. today and yesterday i forgot my key to my house and of course my sister has the other one (why the hell does she need it?) so yesterday i went morgans house after school for a while n we basically sat round her room n listened to music n crap like that. today caroline like insisted i stay over her house till my mom got home so we went to 711 n got slurpees n then we went to her house n walked her puppy n played DDR. later im going to see harry potter with the fam n moms 'friend' ed. we might meet caroline there too. knowing her shell prolly get her parents to take her.
god i hate so much being mad at people i love so much. i dont want to be mad at him and i prolly shouldnt be mad at him but i cant help it...
post more later
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[01 Jun 2004|04:12pm] |
I feel so broken up
And I give up
I just want to tell you so you know
Here I go,
scream my lungs out
and try to get to you
You are my only one
I let go, there's just no one that gets me like you do
You are my only, my only one
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| sick of it all |
[29 May 2004|11:12pm] |
| [ |
mood |
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 indescribable |
] |
gahh everythings so fucked up..i dont kno why i just dont commit the 's' word..im just so scared and confused and i dont even kno why and i hate this so much and i cant stand living like this but death seems like it should be so far away..i dont kno why i put up with waking up feeling like shit, gong through a day of hellish fake cheerfulness just to go to sleep to do it all over again. i could kill myself right this very second and i dont kno why i dont. ive cut, ODed..so many things that could have killed me but never enough that it was fatal. im just so afraid of everything. im so fucking paranoid. i hate it.
its weird how sometimes ill feel so much better than usual, almost happy, like things could actually go well, and other times ill feel like crap and coming so close to taking a knife to my wrists..i can just imagine it, putting the blade to my skin, letting go of everything good or bad..
i dont kno why im so scared of hurting the people i love, when sometimes i feel like they feel just the opposite about me. i spose one of the only reasons keeping me from actually killing myself is being with the people i love..
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[26 May 2004|04:54pm] |
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mood |
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cheerful |
] |
today went suprisingly well even though everyone was like harassing me cos they thought i didnt go to school yesterday just cos it was field day n i didnt feel like going. well i dunno about anyone else but i certainly dont want to be sitting outside all day with people running around and yelling while im feeling like my head is going to explode at any second and like im about to throw up what little i ate. yesterday kinda sucked cos i wanted to work on my ILA project cos i barely started writing the actual report part of it but i couldnt because, being the idiot that i am, i left all my info in my locker. today was the pep rally at school..it makes no sense to me why its at the end of the year instead of the beginning. well the pep rally wasnt exactly what i would call 'fun'-especially cos i had a massive headache the whole time-but it got me out of science which is cool..i guess..now ive got to finish my language project which is boring as hell. jenna gave me an excuse to take a break a lil while ago cos she called n shes like 'lets call gabe sacco!' i havent talked to him in almost 2 years so im like why do you wanna talk to him?! but she pursuaded me so we called him on the three way thingy n we were like harassing him cos he didnt remember me or jenna or kiah or caroline or anyone and jenna asked him if he remembered the time when he borrowed money from me n then put it in a vending machine for me cos he didnt want it anymore and i wouldnt take it back n hes like 'what the hell are you talking about?!' it was hilarious but i guess you kinda had to be there for it to be funny. his voice got all deeper from when i last talked to him its great. i think i still have some pictures of him..
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[24 May 2004|03:57pm] |
| [ |
mood |
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listless |
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feeling a bit better..i really hate being depressed like this and the weather isnt helping much-the humidity literally makes me ill. its disgusting.
the days are going well i spose..ever since the cutting incident, morgans been acting like theres been nothing wrong and were back to being friends. i couldnt really care less now-dont have the energy. the way i see it, let her do what she wants and no one will get hurt. usually.
tonight is the concert thingy at school..i hate school-y things. they suck ass
havent posted one of these in a while...
| hot tea or iced tea?: | hot | | sweet or unsweet?: | sweet | | ice cream or cake?: | ice cream ^.~ | | chocolate milk or regular?: | dont like milk.. | | what do you do when you're bored?: | listen to music | | what book are you in the middle of?: | Interview With the Vampire [still...] | | do you ever really "laugh out loud" when you talk online?: | all the time | | do you leave messages on peoples' cellphones, or just hang up?: | hang up usually | | have you ever blocked someone from your buddy list?: | yes | | am i that person?: | i dont kno you | | do you wash your hair everyday?: | yea | | would you rather cut your own hair?: | sometimes | | is this survey gay yet?: | yea kinda | | did you just answer "yes" for the last question?: | yes | | can i kill you?: | go ahead | | have you ever spent an entire day with just yourself?: | yes | | do you believe in god?: | in a way.. | | are you serious?: | go away | | when's the last time you cried?: | a few days ago | | do you think it's wrong that I sometimes wear eye makeup?: | not at all | | well who asked you anyway?!: | you | | do you use public restrooms?: | not if i can help it | | do you enjoy long drives on the interstate?: | i cant drive | | how fast would you be driving if the speed limit was 45mph?: | | | do you spend more than $20 in gas per week?: | i dont spend any money on gas | | do you write poetry?: | not really | | do you draw?: | yep | | do you play an instrument?: | sure | | what instrument would you like to play that you don't already?: | dunno | | |
songofabitch's Untitled brought to you by BZOINK!
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[19 May 2004|04:21pm] |
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And suddenly..It's all alright..
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[18 May 2004|03:55pm] |
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mood |
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 melancholy |
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ive really been hating life lately..i hate living like this i cant take it anymore. i feel like there is no one i can trust and no one cares about me. does anyone care about me? god i feel so fucking selfish. no one should care about me anyway. i hate it. i hate being such a bitch to my "friends" with out meaning to. i hate acting so happy all the time like nothings wrong when everything inside is just falling apart. i hate how my family thinks there is nothing wrong. i hate keeping everything from everyone like its all a big secret. i hate feeling trapped in my horrible twisted mind where there is nothing better to do than fuck with other peoples minds, twisting their words and fighting over the most insignificant things and end up just pissing them off which is the exact opposite of what i want to do And what i hate most is all my fucking complaining all the time but thats exactly what im doing right now. im contradicting myself. i cant stand it anymore.
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[14 May 2004|08:53am] |
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mood |
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 crappy |
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fuck it all
i give up
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