| i feel horrible...with a little touch of tired... |
[11 Dec 2005|03:21pm] |
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*sigh*...I keep thinking about Mexico lately...the Mexico Mexico...not chatopia Mexico...but yeah...that shit was fun...*sigh*...uh-huh...it was...there's a lot of things from my past that were fun...that i miss like hell...so many things that i'd like to do differently...but...there is no way to go back and fixed them all...so all i can do is just pray that i don't make NE more stupid mistakes that i wish i could take back...but i always do...i don't know what's wrong with me lately...it just feels like i'm loosing everything...on the inside that is...it just so hard to explain...but i just don't feel the same NE more...like my stupid little "women's intuition"...it's gone...i used to get like strong feelings about things...whether they were right or wrong...i always got them...(they were usually right...lol...or so i like to think)...but yeah....it's just like gone...the belief i use to have in myself...about NE thing...like my acting abilities...or my abilities as a person...like being strong...or being right...and things like that...it's gone...i don't believe in myself at all...everything is just changing so fast and so drastically...i just dunno what to do...or how to deal...i'm so fuckin scared...I'm so fuckin scared and lost...i just don't know what to do...i'm not ready to be alone yet...but it's coming so fucking fast...i don't know what to do...
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