| my beautiful empty balloon |
[04 Mar 2004|07:36am] |
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nicole breaks a car o wait no she didnt uhh the BMW let me remind u all that caring about a car more than ur friends feelings would be called materialism. so tahts wht ill call it ..materialism.. the ryan thing is out of control everyone cant stand him the sad thing is he is only part of the problem.yes he is an asshole yes he is rude inconciderate obnoxious annoying degrading etc i could go on for ever...but she is now the epitome of what i dont like to be around...my car my boyfriend my good grades my clothes look at me look at me im fake im putting on a show to please everyone im perfect (but im not) o but i am i dont talk to jessica but its her fault we are not friends anymore ryan is my life as long as everything looks good on the outside who cares waht its like on the inside...that is wat i see when i look at her thats it nomore happy just fake happy and she thinks she is fooling us all but not me i know u to well,to well to be fooled... ur not a bubbley bouncy perfect blonde in some teen movie u WERE my best frind i dont know waht u are now!and i dont know waht u want from me ??? i know waht i want for u ...to be urself unless this is u know and if it is i feel bad for u cus taht is jsut sad!and when people tell u there secrets keep them that doesnt mean o i can tell ryan bo u dont cus now i tell nothing of myself to u if u want to know it u can figure it out on ur own...dont gossip to other friends about other friends we will find out and then to have the nerve to pretend like u didnt is just being a coward. its crazy how someones opinion of someone so close can change but it has i held u with the utmost respect now its all gone how could u do taht cus u did ... tears running from your eyes wont save u now face ur problems as they come and they will...u can chose to run away from this or come to terms with wat has been said of u.althoughi know u want me as a friend i think u must listen to wat i have to say u have lost ur personality and replaced it wiith wat u think a girl should be like......to me ur are beautiful,smart but utterly translucent and i can see straight thru u..start caring about the things taht used to mean a lot to u. so deceptive to the world but blind to see the reasons why my beautiful empty balloon.
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