*steph*'s Blurty Entries [entries|friends|calendar]
*steph*

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[05 Aug 2003|10:56pm]
[ mood | *Sigh* ]
[ music | Change by GC ]

steph oxo

*...M a k e A W i s h...*

-My Last Entry* [05 Aug 2003|02:52pm]
Im gonna make a new blurty... If you want my new one just IM me on aol and ask me what it is ..or sumfin...

*me*
*...M a k e A W i s h...*

[05 Aug 2003|12:40am]
I was thinking... I think its kind of weirdish if a Christian will just openly talk about Christ all the time and constantly say that he/she is or should be Christ like or whatnot. Cuz I think that a person should keep it to themselves. Having a relationship w/ Christ is a very personal thing. Between you and Chris and you shouldn't have to share that w/ the world 24/7. It's great to be proud of what you believe in. but if you do that to much, it sort of seems like your doing it for attention. And ppl don't wanna be around that. I've learned to keep what's between me and God, exactly how it should be, between me and God. I don't know why or how that all popped into my head, but it did, so I just thought i'd share it. *smile*Welp, I'm soon going to bed. Right after I do something first... Later

*me*
¤.3.¤ *...M a k e A W i s h...*

[04 Aug 2003|10:18pm]
[ music | The click by GC ]

I went shopping today. It was great. lol I don't even care that it was w/ my mom! It's weird how close me n my mom have gotten over the last couple of days. She talks to me about things and I tell her things now too. It's a ...um, different? expeirence. Today is Rosie's Birfday and I sung to her! lol, and I never sing so you have to be extremely lucky for me to sing to you. lol cuz i um, whats the word...SUCK. lol anyhoo, i'll update later tonight when i feel like typing more...

me

*...M a k e A W i s h...*

... [04 Aug 2003|12:11am]
This sucks...this whole situation I'm in... It just sucks... (Elyse n me talked about this....) but I feel awful, and maybe I shouldn't... but I do... I'm gonna puke...

*me*
¤.3.¤ *...M a k e A W i s h...*

[03 Aug 2003|09:41pm]
[ mood | bored ]
[ music | The clicking of the computer keys.. ]

My sister is so annoying sometimes. Most times actually. She just yells a lot and when she says she's gonna do something, she never does it and it's really making me mad. My room is so purdy right now and I miss my Shellie. She's over at a friend's house I think. I'm so bored. This house is really boring when no one calls you and when you have nothing to do. I really should go for a bike ride tomorrow around the neighborhood. I think I might. Wait, no I have to go shopping tomorrow. Wow, the word shopping almost sounds foriege comeing for my mouth. I haven't gone shopping for awhile. My mommy said she'll buy me a cd tomorrow and I'm thinking about which one I should get.Hmmm I'll think hard on that (haha, that sounds funny) I'm kind of hungry right now. I should make something, but that would require me getting up. Ehh, I don't wanna do that. It's funny, I thought I'd hate it here, but it's not so bad. I saw a lot of hott guys at the walmart yesterday (Now I know why ashton goes so much) and two of them I saw walking around my neighborhood (Oh this should be fun...) Haha... One bad thing about this place, theirs a dog next door! Ah! If you know me, you know I hate dogs..well, big ones that aren't in cages... lol Seriously, I'm scared to go in my backyard now... lol yeah, I'm stupid...I'll update later tonight when I get bored...

*Me*

*...M a k e A W i s h...*

[03 Aug 2003|04:46pm]
[ mood | good ]
[ music | Michelle's voice ]

Welp, I'm moved into my new house :-) I'm home alone right now too. Their off buying a new tv or something. Uhm, thats about it...

-Steph-

*...M a k e A W i s h...*

Last day in Millersburg... [30 Jul 2003|05:28pm]
[ mood | rushed ]
[ music | New Beginning by Trapt ]

Oi.Okay, so today is my last day in Millersburg, right? And Brittnay came over. Don't get me wrong, that made me soo happy and I had a lot of fun but I don't know. It's kind of depressing to know that this will be my last night sleeping in my own bedroom. And ... I don't know, it makes me feel like I'm gonna puke. The move is actually becoming real..like.. before I couldn't picture my house empty, but now it is... and I was just thinking " damn, I'm really moving" and I feel like I'm gonna cry everytime I think about it. Gosh, am I gonna miss everyone! I wont' be on the computer until like um. um. Monday? Maybe? Sunday night maybe. I'll update later...

*Steph*

¤.6.¤ *...M a k e A W i s h...*

[29 Jul 2003|06:01pm]
[ mood | content ]
[ music | Beatiful ..by some ..band..i forget who ]

Today I went to my mom's work w/ her. It was uhm, interesting? Haha, her job is quite boring actually. The ppl she works w/ are kind of cool. So to speak. I just sat their listening to music and drawing pictures and writing lyrics n poems n whatnot. When I get older I want to make sure that I'm not stuck in some office for the whole enitre freakin day. It's so boring. I want to work for a newspaper or something. Cuz then I get out of the office to go report on the artical then I get to go home and finish the artical then go back to the office to hand it in to the editor (Hopefully one day, I'll be the editor). I hoping that it's loud and noisy and lots of great/interesting storys. But it's not a perfect world. I want to also be a photographer. That'd be awesome too. I love writing n taking pictures. Anhoo, today at my physical the doctor said I was "discustingly healthy" and I'm like " ..um. thanks?" It was ...interesting. Tomorrow, I'm not sure what I'm doing durning the day. (Maybe the mall w/ Megan ((if were still going)) or hanging out w/ Britt...Megan asked me first so if she can take me, I'm goin to the mall but if not, I'll invite Britt over) And then if theirs enough room in the car then I'm gonna take Britt to the Berrysburg carnival...I'll update later!

*Steph*

*...M a k e A W i s h...*

... [28 Jul 2003|11:18am]
[ mood | content ]
[ music | Send me an angel... ]

I haven't updated this thing for a LONG time. Well lets start off w/ what all happened on Saturday... I wanted to go into town to hang out w/ Kirk since he was leaving for camp on Sunday, right? But then I invited Megan to hang out w/ me too. I looked at is as where all of us could hang out. No biggie, right? Well, then we walked to kirks house and other ppl showed up and then he had to clean and me, Megan, n Britt went for a walk. Well, Kirk got pissed that we left, I guess. But oh well, we were gonna come back anyway. And when we came back. Brandon n Michelle (The girl he has this thing for at the begining of the year) were at his house. It kind of made me dissappointed that she was their but I would have gotten over it. Anyway, he was being really rude when we showed up. And Brittnay's like, "I wanna go" and I'm like "yeah" and Kirk like made this pissed off face and I wasn't gonna come back. Cuz when he's being rude or assholish, I don't want to hang out w/ him.That only makes sense. Me,Kami, n Britt went to the pool and right before we went in the water I decided to dump Kirk cuz he does piss me off alot and I'm moving and it just wasn't worth it. So I dumped him. Then we were gonna go swimming but it was to cold (we're retards) Then I went down to the park and Taryn n Megan Troutman were their and they were telling me how they went to his house this morning and he was naked and he kept saying "come on" to Megan so that she'd give him head. She didn't though but he like wouldn't quit touching them and whatnot. That's when I was really glad that I dumped him. Cuz I'm sick of that stuff. He showed up at the park then and didn't even say one word to me. I was gonna pull him aside and try to talk to him. But I'm sick of always having to do that. Ya know? It's always me who makes the effort. Well, at least until he feels like an asshole and decides to talk to me. But I just figured he'd walk away or tell me to get off of him like he always does. So I didn't say anything to him. So then me and Howie slept over at Kamis house. That was a lot of fun. lol But Sunday morning I figured Kirk would at least call to say "bye" before I left. Ya know? Since I'm moving Thursday and he won't get to talk to me before that. I just thought he would. So I left the cell phone on (just in case) But he didn't call. That made me feel like puking. But, oh well. And today my Gram was supose to pick me up, but she hasn't called so yeah well. When I came home last night, the house is completely plain. Like, only the main funiture. The rest of the crap like movies n nicknacks n everything else, is put away. It's depressing cuz the move is becoming more realisitic. But now I don't really have anything (or one) to keep me wanted to stay here. (Kirk that is.) I don't think me and him will talk that much anymore. I think we ruined it. But, I don't want it to be that way. I want him to still be my bestfriend. I guess it doesn't matter though. It just seems like everything he's ever said, is just a lie cuz he cheated on me... Cuz when you love someone, you don't do that. He said that he was just "being stupid" the first time. But then why would he attempt to do it again? Exactly. I dont' know. I won't get to see him anymore. Who knows? Maybe I will see em' around sometime. (I hope) Even though it kind of hurts to see him not w/ me, I'd just like it a lot if me and him could at least be friends. I'll meet someone new, I hope. Someone who I can talk to and be best friends w/ and someone who won't cheat on me or be rude. But at the same time, be really sweet and caring and who doesn't say " oh that girls hott" or be checking out other girls...and saying that he was looking at some bald guys head. I mean, riiiiiight. Heh, maybe the break up was good. lol Anyway, I'm not really pissed off at anyone right now (Surprising I know) But I think Rosie started sumfin bad and I'm disappointed in her. And in myself (for reasons...) Anyhoo, I'm done typing. Later

-Steph-

¤.4.¤ *...M a k e A W i s h...*

... [24 Jul 2003|06:48pm]
Geez, wow I haven't updated this in awhile. But anyhoo...last night Kirk asked me back out *Blush* and I said yeah. lol But I just now realized that last night was the 23rd. Soooo if we would have never broken up it would have been our three month aniversery. :-/ yeah... So anyway, tonight I'm going out to eat w/ Nikki's family and then going to her Mom's house to sleep over. Yay... that should be fun. In an exact week, I'll be moved into my new house... Yeah...thats always cool to think about... Anyway, I really don't feel like typing right now. I'll update this later...maybe tomorrow.

*Steph*
*...M a k e A W i s h...*

[21 Jul 2003|12:10pm]
I had an extremely weird dream last night. Anyhoo, I actually went to bed early last night (Like midnight) I'm in a good mooooooooooooooooood today! I started off feeling awful...then.... I think Kirk got online.... :-) I think he found my dream remotely (WHAT DOES REMOTELY MEAN?) funny... I'm listening to my old mixed cds and their cool. " SHAKE YA TAIL FEATHER" Welp, I'm gonna go.... and dance...or sumfin....

- Steph -
¤.2.¤ *...M a k e A W i s h...*

[20 Jul 2003|12:25am]
I LOVE KIRK
*...M a k e A W i s h...*

[19 Jul 2003|01:04pm]
Okay, I went to bed at 1 right? And then I woke up around 5 and I stayed up until 6 then I fell back asleep until 12:20 and I'm still really tired. I should go back to sleep but I don't want to. Omg, I just got my pictures from Jessica of the last day of school. A lot of me and her together. I don't look to bad in these pictures actually. Jessica looks really pretty. I have one w/ Megan in it too! Wowie! Well, I think I'm gonna go up to my room now. Later..

*Steph*
*...M a k e A W i s h...*

My awful dream... [18 Jul 2003|10:33am]
Okay, this may not seem like that bad of a dream to you but it was the worst thing that could ever happen to me. It started off w/ Kirk going to camp right? And while he was gone Dusty convinced me that I should dump Kirk when he got back. So when he got back I told him that even though I still loved him I liked Dusty and that me and him could still be friends. (Thank God that was only a dream cuz like, thats the lamest excuse ever) And kirk like didn't care at all then I realized that that was REALLY stupid. And I like started to cry (in my dream) cuz kirk started to ignore me and wouldn't talk to me. And I like seriously, woke up crying and then I was thinking " oh crap, was that a dream?!" and then I had to think about it for awhile, then I'm like "Thank God it was a dream" Okay well, I'm busy right now. so, i'll update later

*Steph*
¤.2.¤ *...M a k e A W i s h...*

[17 Jul 2003|04:40pm]
Have you ever by The Offspring-


Falling, I'm falling

Have you ever walked through a room
But it was more like the room passed around you
Like there was a leash around your neck that pulled you through

Have you ever been at someplace
Recognizing everybody's face
Until you realized that there was no one there you knew
Well I know

Some days, my soul's confined and out of mind
Sleep forever
Some days, I'm so outshined and out of time
Have you ever

Falling, I'm falling

Have you ever buried your face in your hands
Cause no one around you understands
Or has the slightest idea what it is that makes you be

Have you ever felt like there was more
Like someone else was keeping score
And what could make you whole was simply out of reach
Well I know

Someday I'll try again and not pretend
This time forever
Someday I'll get it straight but not today
Have you ever

Falling, I'm falling

Some days, my soul's confined and out of mind
Sleep forever
Some days, my darkest friend is me again
Have you ever
Someday I'll try again and not pretend
This time forever
Someday I'll get it straight but not today
Have you ever

When the truth walks away
Everybody stays
Cause the truth about the world is that crime does pay

So if you walk away
Who is gonna stay
Cause I'd like to think the world is a better place

When the truth walks away
Everybody stays
Cause the truth about the world is that crime does pay

So if you walk away
Who is gonna stay
Cause I'd like to make the world be a better place

When the truth walks away
Everybody stays
Cause the truth about the world is that crime does pay

So if you walk away
Who is gonna stay
Cause I'd like to think the world is a better place
I'd like to leave the world as a better place
I'd like to think the world...


^Awesome song...

*Steph*
*...M a k e A W i s h...*

... [17 Jul 2003|01:36pm]
Okay so, last night was weird. I got kind of mad at Kirk bcuz he said a lot of rude things that really made me feel bad. I guess he wanted to hang out today but I don't think I'll be allowed I mean, I know it's youth and all but I don't know. Plus I really don't think I want to go cuz I won't have a great time if I'm mad at the person I'm going w/. Anyhoo, I really don't know what to say anymore. Me and Michelle had a date last night, it was amazing (As usual) Okay, now I really have nothing to say.

-Steph-
¤.1.¤ *...M a k e A W i s h...*

... [17 Jul 2003|04:03am]
Hey! So... How are me and Kirk? Dandy (not) But I don't know what's going on. I'm talking to Michelle, that's always fun. lol I'll update later today
*...M a k e A W i s h...*

[16 Jul 2003|10:08pm]
[ mood | hungry ]
[ music | Learn the hard way by Brandy ]

I just got back from hanging out at the pool and park. A lot of ppl were there. I walked there w/ Elyse but she left early cuz she felt like it or something like that. Last night Elyse slept over and around 10:30 or something we thought it'd be funny if we wore boxes on our heads and walked around my neighborhood barefoot. So then we asked Kirk if he wanted to walk over to my house and hang out. And he did. He borrowed Brandon's bike and wrecked at Hillside so now Brandon's mad at Kirk. But anyway, he flashed Elyse. :-/ Anyhoo, my dad got mad at me for leaving the house a mess. I mean, jeez, it wasn't even that bad. He was like swearing and yelling to me on the phone. So when I got home I had to put the dishes away and my mom came out and asked me what was wrong (How did she know something was wrong?) and I told her nothing (duh) and then she helped me put away the dishes. I can't wait for the pool thingy this Friday! Yayy. Kami is finally gonna dump Howie. (She said she was anyway) cuz he's being a complete jerk to her all of the time, it really sucks for her. She gets upset over him a lot and to me, it just doesn't seem worth it. If a guy makes you cry THAT much, you shouldn't be going out w/ him. Just like that quote thinger -"No guy is ever worth your tears and when you find one that is,he won't make you cry"- Anywayz, Taryn told me something tonight...and some other ppl were talking about something, and that made me think.

*Steph*

¤.1.¤ *...M a k e A W i s h...*

[15 Jul 2003|12:07pm]
[ mood | tired ]
[ music | Why Can't I By Liz Phair ]

I just got up and I'm still really tired, but I went to bed kind of early *like 3am* I'm listening to Why Can't I by Liz Phair. I love this song! "why can't I breath whenever I think about you, why can't I speak whenever I talk about you?" I guess Brittnay is upset about what she just heard about Justin. I don't think it's worth it. I think that if your mad at the person half of the time time, it's not worth it. I mean, yeah, everyone gets mad at the person their going out w/ sometimes but it shouldn't really be a regular thing. And Justin lied to her a lot. I just feel bad when she feels bad cuz I don't want her to feel bad about anything. I just kind of get sick of hearing everything about Justin. (Justin this, Justin that. Just forget about him!) Of course it's really hard to forget about someone when your still using a sn that has his name in it. And on your buddylist he's still under his own special group. And when you've got "I love Justin" writen everwhere. Personally, if I were her...I'd make a new sn, delete him off my list, and cross out everytime I wrote his name. Out of sight, out of mind. Britt's probably gonna be mad I put all this stuff in here, but it's just what I think. I move in like two or three weeks, that's not that long. I can't wait actually. I want to move into the house and get settled and maybe make some friends before school starts. Yeah, I'll miss all of my other friends back here but if I have to make new friends, I might as well move sooner and make some before school. I'll probably go to the Millersburg end of summer pool party. If my mom will drive me down, if not...oh well. The band *PHK* is playing at the pool this Friday. i'm going to that. I think Elyse's is getting her tatoo this Friday too. I'm not sure if I'm going along or not. Michelle is still sleeping *Geez, it must be like 11:20 her time!* I think I might go to the pool today. I'm not sure yet though. Oh well, I think I'm gonna go and listen to music and get back on aol. I'll update later...

-steph-

Ps> High five to Elyse who made my layout :-) Thanks!

¤.1.¤ *...M a k e A W i s h...*

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