Sarah's Blurty
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Below are the 20 most recent journal entries recorded in Sarah's Blurty:

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    Monday, March 15th, 2004
    5:20 pm
    >>>it's been a while<
    SO, as usual these days, it's been a while since I've last written to you b/c I'm a slacker and you know that already! Oh my goodness! So yeah, Friday Chris FINALLY asked me for my number and of course, I gladly gave it to him! He called me b/f I went to work Friday night and we talked for about 45 minutes. Then he emailed me and said I could call him when I got home from work if i wasn't too sleepy. Well, I was very sleepy, but I wanted to talk to him, you know? So, I called him a 1 am and actually felt bad b/c I ended up waking him up! Anyway, I thought we'd talk for like an hour at the most b/c well, he was asleep when I called and all that jazz. We ended up staying on the phone 'til like 6:15 in the morning, that's like 5 hours on the phone! It was so awesome! He is like seriously the coolest guy ever! We have so much stuff in common and he's just funny and sweet and all that. I mean, I'm still super nervous about the whole thing b/c he still doesn't know what I look like and that really does worry me b/c I don't want to lead him on or anything. I wish he'd ask me to send him pics or something. If he doesn't say anything by tomorrow night, I'm gonna tell him that I'm gonna send him some, just to get it over with and then if he's like "most" guys and runs, Ijust hope I won't get too upset. I mean I should be used to it by now, but Chris is really special, even though he dated one of the nastiest ho's I know. Anyway, only time will tell.

    Work, was really shitty the last few days b/c someone (I'm not going to name names here) is stealing and we have all this extra crap we have to do every shift and all that jazz...but i didn't have to yesterday b/c the "theif" wasn't working and they know it isn't me. Anyway, "K" seemed a little on the jealous side yesterday. I was talking about being on the phone til 6 am on Saturday and he wanted to know who i was talking to, but I told him that he wasn't my father and that it was none of business! Anyway, I'm not intintuionally making him jealous, but it kind-of feels good, you know? Then one of our co-workers said that he thinks me and "K" have "something going on," he didn't specify...but i wish we did! I hope that something works b/w me and Chris b/c he's such a cool guy, but if now, I really need to start working this thing b/w me and "K," you know? OK, well I need to clean my room and I'll talk to you later. Have a great eveneing and remember>>>Someday we'll all find true love:)~Sarah

    Current Mood: anxious
    Current Music: "with you" ~ jessica simpson, yes again:)
    Thursday, March 11th, 2004
    11:27 pm
    OK, so I was supposed to get off @ 6 tonight b/c I was working int concession today, but that just didn't happen. One of my co-workers needed to get off at 6 b/c she had to go to choir rehersal, so I volunteered to work until like 8:30 for her. So, I went into the box office around 6 and there was this really weird guy who was freaking me out. I've been there for 2 years now and have seen lots of "creepy" ppl, but none who have actually freaked me out this way! Anyway, he bought a ticket like an hour and 20 minutes b/f it was to start and kept going in and out of the theater and asking me if his robot was ready and then asking if i wanted a dollar..he was just odd and I thought he might have a gun or something! So, then he went to the mall and came back when it was time for his movie, but I never saw him go in and we looked through all the theaters and there was no sign of him! I was worried that he might be lurcking around the theater, so "K" offered to walk me out to my car tonight and look under it for me...awww!! He's the cutest guy ever:). I was looking at him today thinking "why does he have to be so damn cute?" Anyway, I got to talk to him a bit today and as usual...the age apporpirate dating thing came up...he thinks it's ok to date someone 10 years/older/younger than you if and only ifi you're both over 25...I still don't get it, but whatever floats your boat I suppose! But, there's only 6 years b/w "K" and I, so I really think that's fine and appropriate, you know?

    Anyway, there was also this really cute guy at the theater today! He was like 20 minutes late for Starksy and Hutch and he walked in when me and "K" were talking and I told him ("K") to go ring him up, but he doesn't do I did and boy was I glad I did! This was such a cute guy! He was tall and cute with a baseball cap on and he smelled EXTREMELY good and it just made me smile. Of course, no one compares to "K" and I hope he knows that b/c I'm so into him it's not even funny, you know? I just wish he'd get a clue! I was going to bring up something today, but never got around to it. I was going to tell him that I'd started to talk to this guy and he was ok, but I really wanted the guy (that would be "K" himself) to get his act together and ask me out, but I couldn't really fit it in and I also brought up the not seeing Starksy and Hutch yet as an opportunity for him to ask me if I wanted to go see it with him, but did he? Hmm...No! he most certainly did not....will he ever get a clue? I think I'm going to ask him one of my magic 8 ball questions on Sunday when he comes to work..."will the guy I like ever get a clue?" and I'll smile and be sweet and flirty and well, maybe he'll finally get it, just maybe:). It's the next thing I can come up with, you know?

    Anyway, I talked to Chris (from yahoo you know) again today and he seems so cool and all, but I really just don't think anything will come of it b/c he's eventually going to want a picture and then he'll never talk to me again! I mean I guess I shouldn't think that, but it's hard not to when so many guys in my past have done that to me, you know? I mean I know I'm no supermodel, but what the hell? Why is it that looks is all someone's after...why the hell can't personality and sense of humor count just as much, if not more that looks! I just don't understand! I mean he used to date some girl from middleon and I'm guessing it's some skinny ho bag or something! I mean, I guess I really shouldn't think so negatively, in fact i know i shouldn't, but it's so damn hard! I mean if "K" would get his shit together, i wouldn't even have to worry about anymore. Anyway, I"m being too negative right about now, so I guess I'll go for tonight and try to talk to you tomorrow...have a great night and remember>>>Someday we'll all find true love:)~Sarah

    Current Mood: nostalgic
    Current Music: "freshman" ~ the verve pipe
    12:19 am
    >>>the trouble with love is...<
    Yeah, there is a lot of trouble with love. And yes, you've guessed it that I'm in one of those "I really want a boyfriend" modes right about now! OK, so I was just complaining about how "K" had yet to reply to my email about tomorrow night and such, calling him an @$$hole and then I get home and there's an email sitting in my inbox from him! Sometimes I wish I didn't feel the way I did about him b/c I know that he's never going to make a move and then again, I think I'd be even sadder without having that hope of him and me in my heart and in my mind. Anyway, he's just like the greatest guy ever! I want him to make a freaking move...I actually just replied to his email and mentioned that I, like him, am yet to have seen Starksy and maybe just maybe he'll put 2 and 2 together and ask me if I wanna see it with him! I just want him to give us a chance, that's all!

    OK, well I talked to Chris (from yahoo) today and he seems really great. I mean he's 26, he has a good job, he knows what he wants out of life, he likes Adam Sandler, he likes spending time with his family...he seems really awesome! Anyway, I'm still really worried though b/c well, his profile says that he wasnts a thin or athletic girl, and well like I said yesterday we all know that I am neither of those things. Anyway, he said in the email he sent me tonight that he likes my peronality and he hasn't yet asked me for a pic, but I know that it's coming and I know that he won't want anything to do with me after he sees me...but if he feels that way, then we know that it wasn't meant to be and sometday i'll find the guy that i'm meant to be with for the rest of my life and if i've already met him..then he just needs to make his move, you know? OK,well it's getting late and I'm sleepy, so I'll talk to you tomorrow if I don't forget. Have a great night and remember>>>Someday we'll all find true love:)~Sarah

    Current Mood: tired
    Current Music: "this love" ~ maroon 5
    Wednesday, March 10th, 2004
    12:21 am
    >>>am i not pretty enough?<
    Yeah, so that's the topic for tonight. I'm wondering why the hell I can't get in a relationship and stay in one, is it really b/c I'm not pretty enough? Yeah, I think I look fine, but I know that the oppostie sex for the most part doesn't think so! And I'm still pissed b/c "K" hasn't replied to the email I sent him Sunday night..he irritaes me sometimes. I think it's b/c he knows how I feel about him or something like that! He jsut pisses me off beyond belfie sometimes, but I still love him whether or not he feels anything towards me.

    So, I'm now talking to this guy named Chris who I met online. Well, he sent me a note on the yahoo site and said he wanted to get to know me, but I have a feeling that'll all change if he asks for a picture b/c well his profile said he was looking for a girl who was either slim, fit or average or atheletic and I am certainly none of those. I guess I'll just have to wait and see what comes of this..I'm not going to jump into anything this time though. you know what i mean? I'm not going to be all like "yeah this could work" until when and if something really does, especially since i know that this g uy isn't looking for a bigger girl, you know? OK, well it's after midnight and I need to be up by 8 tomorrow morning and all. So, have a great night and i'll try to write tomorrow as well...and remember>>>Someday we'll all find true love:)~Sarah

    Current Mood: sleepy
    Current Music: "bring on the rain" ~ jodee messina
    Monday, March 8th, 2004
    11:16 pm
    >>>it's been a while<
    OK, well I haven't written on here in exactly one week. I'm really not sure why, but you do know how i can be. Yeah, that just means that I don't have a real reason for not writing on here in a week! I've just been working and going to class and my field placement and such! And spending way too much time thinking about "K," but that's par for the course, don't you think? Yeah, it really is! I"m retarded (and i'm currently listening to "let's get retarded" by black eye peas:). Yeah, it makes me think of Justin from Hot there's a hottie:)!!!!

    OK< well we are no longer allowed to have our Thursday night sneak peeks @ we are all seriously pissed off! And I've decided that we must do something on Thursday nights as a group! So i'm working on what we're going to do this Thursday night and I'm serioulsy consiering bowling! I mean I think it'll be fun, you know? I'm also in the process of talking "K" into coming to do whatever it is that we're going to do on Thursday night. I mean it'll be fine if he doesn't come, but It'd be awesome if he did, you know?

    Anyway! Yeah, my weekly horoscope from MSN came in last night and here is what it said: You don't want any fights on a first date. There continues to be a lot of activity in the love and romance section of your chart, so be extra careful. Mercury in Pisces gives you the green light to take the initiative and talk to anyone who appeals to you. But do be careful, as Mercury also makes a square to Pluto, and aspects Mars. Verbal fireworks could be one result of this influence. But however they happen, it wouldn't be a good idea to wound anyone with one of your mortally sarcastic barbs. weird is that? I mean especially the hung up on love thing and the sarcastic barbs! I mean what the hell? Anyway, I'm getting sleepy 'cause i've been up since like 6:30 and now it's after 11...I'm off to dream land where i can think and dream about my prince, "K!":)...yeah, I'm a dork thank you once again for noticing! Anyway, have a great night and remember someday we'll all find true love:)~Sarah

    Current Mood: loved
    Current Music: "with you" ~ jessica simpson...yeah i know!
    Monday, March 1st, 2004
    1:55 pm
    boys are asses!
    Sunday, February 29th, 2004
    10:48 pm
    >>>it's been a while<
    HEY! Well, it's been a while since I've written, like 4 days to be, sorry about that! I've been feeling not so well this weekend b/c of the fact that it is my "time of the month" and all. But anyway, it's also been extremely busy at work with "the passion" and all. And I've been feeling kind-of bad about something b/w "K" and I that happened on Friday afternoon. See, we were talking and being "dumb" as usual and he said something stupid and instead of just laughing or giving him the finger like I usually do jokingly I simply looked at him and said, "fuck you," which was horrible of me! I mean I love "K" with all my heart (I truly do) whether he feels the same about me or not, but it just came out and I've felt like shit about it over these last few days! I mean I appologized in an email Friday night, but he never replied back. He gave me the movie i asked him for today though and I talked to him for a bit and told him that I was really sorry and I did come home from work tonight and sent him another email and thanked him for the movie and then appologized once again! I mean I'm such a RETARD!! How could I tell the man of my dreams, the man I'm in love to "fuck himself" basically! I just feel like a complete asshole for saying it at all! Oh well...hopefully he'll forgive me because whether he knows it or not and whether he feels the same way or not...I do love him and beleive that I always will! Well, I guess that's all for tonight...I'm gonna go read a bit b/f I hit the hay since I have my 8am class tomorrow....SUMMER>>>>hurry up and get here 'cause I'm ready for a break!....have a great night and remember>>>Someday we'll all find true love:)~Sarah
    Wednesday, February 25th, 2004
    11:04 pm
    >>>my head hurts:(<
    OK, so my head hurts so freaking badly! I need to get myself some asprin or somethingn and go to sleep. So, I'm also extremely tiered as usual...I have to go to work tomorrow night and I know that it's gonna suck so bad! I mean I'll be in the box but Mr. Asshole will be there tomrrow and you know how much I can't stand his ass! So anyway, I didn't end up going to church b/c of my exam reviews and the fact that i ended up meeting with my lame-ass group that are the biggest asses ever! They all hate homosexuals and are all country and they just aren't my kind of ppl at all. I mean I didn't speak my mind b/c I have to work with these ppl for the rest of the semester, but they really did piss me off!

    Did I tell you that I got to see "K" last night? I don't think I did...but I did get to see him and talk to him and of course flirt with him last night at work...damn, he's the cutest guy ever and I just love it when he wears those long sleeve shirts and all....ahhh...he's the most adorable guy ever and I just want to tell him so! Well, I guess I should be going b/c i'm really beat tonight. Have a great night and remember>>>Someday we'll all find true love:)~Sarah

    Current Mood: tired
    Current Music: "come clean" ~ hilary duff (i don't like her...but her tunes are quite catchy:)
    Tuesday, February 24th, 2004
    5:06 pm
    >>>so maybe everything's going to be alright<
    SO, I don't remember when I last wrote on here, but I'm guessing that it was like Suday b/c that's when my bestest friend left. Anyway, so yeah things might really be alright these days. I told you about emailing "K" on Sunday and all right? Well, he's so damn cute and today he emailed me at like 7:30 am telling my why he wasn't at the movie (Passion of the Christ) last night (he was tiered) and that he hoped I had another good day today with a smiley:) after it....oh he makes my insides smile, if that's even possible. This random guy messaged me yesterday b/c I sent him an icebreaker on, but he just seems weird like all the others, well I mean I didn't think Alex was weird, he was apparently just a complete asshole! But yeah, this guy I'm talking to now isn't even worth anything b/c he asked for a pic in less than 5 minutes and he hasn't responded to my comments in like 8 minutes, I guess he's too busy, but it wasn't going to turn out to be anything anyway...i've come to learn that about guys, you know? The entire last year of my life (well, yeah from last february to this one) has been learning how to weed out creepy guys...I mean from Patrick to Misha to Justin to Terry to Alex and all the ones in between, the only guy not to piss me off and thouroughly irritate me in these past 12 months of my life has been, "K" who will continue to remain only known as "K" until we're officially together like I know we will be someday:). Anyway, he just makes me happy and he makes me smile and wow...he's just amazing and every once in a while I just want to email him and be are adorable and I love you, but I know better than that...I may have done that type of thing with Patrick, hell I'm pretty sure I did it more than once with his dumb ass, but not "K" b/c "K" is real and he's the total opposite of the asshole formerly known as Patrick! Anyway, I guess what i'm saying is that I'm still going to be hopeful for me and "K" b/c well, yeah I think something's going to come out of all of this in the end. OK, well I'm gonna go for now b/c I have to be to work in an hour and!! Alright, so if I don't get a chance to be back on here tonight...I'll definately hollar at you tomorrow;) have a great night and remember>>>Someday we'll all find true love:)~Sarah

    Current Mood: hopeful
    Current Music: "the way you look tonight" ~ frank sinatra, yeah i'm a uber-geek...thanks for noticing that fact once again:)
    Sunday, February 22nd, 2004
    8:00 pm
    >>>"K"....will it ever work or even get started?!<
    OK, so sorry about not writing yesterday or Friday after work and all, but my bestest friend in the entire world was in town this weekend, so I've been kind-of busy. Friday night after work I went over to her parents house and we were up 'til 3am rambling and then I had class at 9 am and she had to get up and do her presentation. Then last night she stayed over here and we were only up 'til around 1am rambling...and I think I uttered the "K" word (yeah, "K's name:)" about a million times over the past two days! I'm such a dork, but I can't help's what I do!

    Anyway, so apparently I am not the only one who thinks that "K" and I could actually being a couple and a good one at that. Friday was really slow at work and I spent most of the day sitting on the little bench across from the box office talking to one of my friends and one of our managers and occasionally "K" and all! So, anyway my horoscope said that it was a good day for romance and so I was like "how am I going to find romance if i'm stuck here all day! I'm not going to go hit on one of those old guys in mooseport (lol)" and she goes, "well, there's always "K"", or something along those lines. Anyway, yeah....I want him so freaking bad...he's on my mind all the time and it doesn't even matter what I'm doing, you know? I mean I was in church today and all I could think about was's sad, but I totally and utterly love the guy! Oh, so I emailed him today and asked "what are the chances of you getting me a copy of 28 days later" and he replies by emailing me with "outlook is good," and I thought that was the cutest thing ever, so I then replied by email with "have you suddenly turned into a magic 8 ball" and if he responds to that (which I strongly hope that he will), I'm gonna have fun with this one! You know, I can ask him random questions about my love life and stuff to break the ice...I just wish his ass would use my cell number and want to hang out...but NO! I mean maybe we just need to work on it some more! I guess I'll talk to you later....I'll try to write tomorrow, but I have class and stuff all day and also we're getting an early sneak peek of Passion of the Christ tomorrow night, so I may not get a chance to write until tuesday. Well, I'm off...have a great night and remember>>>Someday we'll all find true love:)~Sarah

    Current Mood: sleepy
    Current Music: "with you" ~ jessica simpson
    Friday, February 20th, 2004
    2:12 am
    >>>oh snap!<
    SO yeah, tonight I saw "K" after not seeing him for like 3 days since he hadn't worked since Sunday and all! Why does he have to be so damn cute? I mean he acts like he's so nonchalant and all and i'm so interested in him and i wish something would work b/w the two of us, you know? it drives me crazy the way he'll flirt with me, but that's all you know? I mean NOTHING else ever comes out of it and it's kind-of getting to me. i mean i wonder if i'm ever going to find a guy who's going to give me the time of day. I'm just sitting here at 2:09 in the morning downloading random love songs and tha't kind-of irritating me too...but it does make me think of "K" and how strongly i feel about him. Well, I'll get to see him all day tomorrow b/c i'm being forced to work until 8, even though my bestest friend in the entire world is coming home tomorrow night and i was supposed to go out to dinner with her and her family and now I can't:(...arrrggg!!! sometimes I REALLY do hate work, you know? OK, well i need to finish listening to my "in your eyes" and get my ass to sleep b/c i gotta be to work by noon tomorrow. and i didn't even read today...and i probably won't tomorrow or sat, so i need to pick it up again on sunday since i'll be off and all. OK< well nighty night. Have a great night/morning/day...and remember what sarah says>>>Someday we'll all find true love:)~Sarah

    Current Mood: awake
    Current Music: "toxic" ~ britney spears (yes, i know...but it's in my head)
    Wednesday, February 18th, 2004
    12:28 am
    SO, I guess I haven't written in a couple of days, so I'm sorry for that fact. I haven't been up to much the last couple of days, just school and work and all that jazz, you know? I still haven't heard anything further from this Alex character and I'm really not sure why. I mean maybe he didn't like what I had to say in the email I sent him, or maybe it's because I didn't have any pics I could send him, or maybe he's just like every other asshole I've met online and everywhere else these days! I wish I could actually find a guy who doesn't suck ass, you know? I mean you know how I feel about "K," but you also know that he won't call me and he hasn't emailed me since like Thrusday or something I do beleive. I mean I was going to emial him, but I decided against it just b/c I'm going to wait and see if he emails me first, I mean I'm sure he won't, but oh well, you know? I mean I just went to his website and am looking at the one pic that he took of himself and it's just really cute and you know that I'm so attracted to him and even if he never wants anything to do with me, I do believe that I will always hold a special place in my heart for him...I want to tell him how I feel SO freaking badly, but I just don't want to jepordize our friendship and our working relationship, you know? I don't know. OH well, I guess I'll go for now. I'll try and write tomorrow night if i get a chance. Have a great night/morning/day and remember>>>Someday we'll all find true love:)~Sarah

    Current Mood: tired
    Current Music: "not pretty enough" ~ kacey chambers
    Sunday, February 15th, 2004
    10:54 pm
    >>>is it just me or is it obvious that me and "K" should be together?<
    SO, yeah! I got to hang out with "K" quite a bit today b/c we weren't that busy and I was glad of that fact. Well, he never ended up emailing me from the other night (Friday that is), but thats alright with me! I'm just going to not email him at all this week and see if he takes the initiative. I mean I'm hoping that he will get all sad b/c I haven't emailed him and he'll take the liberty to email or call (i doubt it) me instead. He's just so weird, you know? I mean he knows damn good and well that if he and I did ever hang out outside of work we would have the greatedst time...ever! I mean we have so much fun at work and all. Todya I asked him why he was so mean to me and not anyone else and he didn't have a very good answer...he just replied by saying that if our manager was downstairs he'd make fun of her as well, which isn't true at all! I just keep thinking about how much I love him...and how much i'd wish he'd do something about it. Well, I have to go to sleep and all, you know b/c I have class tomorrow, even though it's president's day...whatever! Ok, have a great night and remember>>>Someday we'll all find true love:)~Sarah

    "Love Song" ~ The Cure

    whenever i'm alone with you you make me feel
    like i am home again whnever i'm alone with
    you you make me feel like i am whole again

    whenever i'm alone with you you make me feel
    like i am young again whenever i'm alone with
    you you make me feel like i am fun again

    however far away i will always love you however
    long i stay i will always love you whatever
    words i say i will always love you i will always
    love you

    whenever i'm alone with you you make me feel
    like i am free again whenever i'm alone with
    you you make me feel like i am clean again

    however far away i will always love you however
    long i stay i will always love you whatever
    words i say i will always love you i will always
    love you

    Current Mood: sleepy
    Current Music: "love song" ~ the cure
    1:31 am
    PS: I forgot to mention that guys are weird and I don't get them at all:(
    1:29 am
    >>>will i ever not know what's going on?<
    SO, yeah! Valentine's day officially sucks ass! It was busy at work today b/c well, it was Valentine's day and also it was raining and all. Anyway, of course it was Satuday, so "K" wasn't there and that always sadens me a bit. I ended up going to see "honey" at the cheap-o theater w/ on of my friends from work and my cousin, but there were these irritating kids there, so yeah!

    I really wanted for "K" to call me (since he DOES have my number now and all), but maybe he's waiting to see what goes down. I get to see him all day tomorrow b/c it's Sunday and "K" is always there on Sundays, PLUS I'm pretty much the only person who's going to be there tomorow who he talks to, so that'll be good, but it'll probably be busy and that's gonna suck ass big time! I'm such a dork-head and I emailed "K" last night and he hasn't replied, so I guess I'll stop sending him emails b/c i know that it most likely irritates him and well, you know how much I care about him! Anyway, I just wish he'd want to be with me or at least hang out with me outside of work b/c i think it'd be so much fun, you know? I mean I don't want to ask him out b/c I'm afraid of rejection like most people. Hopefully things will just work out for the best, but I mean I just don't want to end up as an olld lady with cats (well, dogs b/c i really don't like cats) without a husband and without any kids and without any love at all! Also, I need some kind-of action in my life. I'm 22 and i've never even really kissed a guy, you know? Well, I mean I've kissed one guy in my entire 22 years and that guy is a giant asshole and i wasn't even interested in him...I want "K" to be that really special guy, you know? But i guess that only time will tell!

    Well, I guess i'll go for now b/c it's almost 1:30 and i"m getting sleepy and I have to get up and be at work by noon tomorrow! Well, have a great night/morning/day and I'll try my best to write back tomorrow night and add all my latest "K" news, if there even happens to be any new "K" updated news:). Well, nighty night and remember>>>Someday we'll all find true love:)~Sarah

    "friday i'm in love" ~ the cure

    I don't care if Monday's blue
    Tuesday's grey and Wednesday too
    Thursday I don't care about you
    It's Friday, I'm in love

    Monday you can fall apart
    Tuesday, Wednesday break my heart
    Thursday doesn't even start
    It's Friday I'm in love

    Saturday, wait
    And Sunday always comes too late
    But Friday, never hesitate...

    I don't care if Mondays black
    Tuesday, Wednesday - heart attack
    Thursday, never looking back
    It's Friday, I'm in love

    Monday, you can hold your head
    Tuesday, Wednesday stay in bed
    Or Thursday - watch the walls instead
    It's Friday, I'm in love

    Saturday, wait
    And Sunday always comes too late
    But Friday, never hesitate...

    Dressed up to the eyes
    It's a wonderful surprise
    To see your shoes and your spirits rise
    Throwing out your frown
    And just smiling at the sound
    And as sleek as a shriek
    Spinning round and round
    Always take a big bite
    It's such a gorgeous sight
    To see you eat in the middle of the night
    You can never get enough
    Enough of this stuff
    It's Friday, I'm in love

    Current Mood: irritated
    Current Music: "friday, i'm in love" ~ the cure
    Friday, February 13th, 2004
    11:20 pm
    >>>frustration...the word that describes my life to a tee<
    So, yeah the whole "K" thing did NOT work the way I had hoped it would, but I pretty much knew that it wouldn't, so yeah! When I went up stairs to get some popcorn this morning when I got to work he seemed like he was in a bad mood, so I was all like "what's your deal?" and he made some stupid remark about mandy moore (and her movie how to deal) and I told him that being that today was his birthday he didn't seem to be in too good of a mood. So, anyway, he finally said something about his b-day gift and we talked for a while today, and I told him that he needed to go out and do something fun for his b-day, but he didn't get my relentless hinting to ask me to hang out with him tonight, so yeah! Anyway, I got home and emailed him, just to bother him/flirt and all, so i'm hoping he'll email me back and then i can try and get him to hang out with me tomorrow night, but it's Valentine's Day, so that probably won't happen..but that would be the best! OK, well i'm gonn go b/c I'm getting tired and I have class in the am, and then work and yeah! OK< have a great night and remember>>>Someday we'll all find true love:)~Sarah

    Current Mood: irritated
    Current Music: "don't let me get me" ~ pink (b/c it has my favorite line "SO IRRITATING":)
    1:27 am
    >>>well, who knows what may come of this<
    So, yeah! Nothing really happened, I mean I waited in my car for him to come out after we watched the movie tonight and I gave him his gift and said that he could just go home and open it since it was freezing outside and it was dark and all. So, I kind-of had to look up at him when I was telling him about the gifts and all and I was just like "I love this guy, I really LOVE this guy!" I know that I too am an enormous dork-head, but I really really do like him, you know? I was hoping he'd call me and tell me that he liked his gifts seeing as how I did give him my number and all...but I knew deep inside that he wouldn't call, not at 1 am anyway:). Well, luckily (for me:) I get to work during the day in box tomorrow, so I get to see "K" all day long and try to talk him into hanging out with me tomorrow night, seeing as how it's his b-day and all and I know he has like NO plans and i'll be bored anyway! So, yeah I'm going to use my dazzling charm and sense of humor to bowl him over, or something:). I really want it to work too b/c, well, you know how I feel about this guy, I mean Jesus...I go on and on about him every freaking night! Well, i think i'm going to be like "what are you going to do for your birthday tonight," and I just hope it'll work and I can get him to ask me to hang out with him ::sigh::!!

    Well, I didn't get another email from this Alex guy tonight, but I really wasn't expecting one. I mean, you know I replied back to his email like within half an hour and that probably weirded him out or something, I mean guys can be extremely weird at times. Anyway, I mean I really would like to get to know him b/c he seems like a cool guy and he's cute (yeah, that's a bit shallow...i know, i know), but I mean I'm still hoping that something will become of me and "K." God...I want to go out with him tomorrow night after we get off work SO badly! OK, well I guess that time will only tell what will happen with me and my love life...if I ever actually get one that is:). I guess I'll talk to you tomorrow after work or something...hopefully with some good "K" and me news, I mean come on, he could do so much worse that me!! Have a great night and remember>>>Someday we'll all find true love:)~Sarah

    Current Mood: curious
    Current Music: "why can't i?" ~ liz phair (it works, don't you think?)
    Thursday, February 12th, 2004
    1:58 pm
    >>>Go Me:)<
    So I FINALLY figured out how to upload a picture on this thing and I used one of Gavin (DeGraw) that has like my favorite lyrics on it! Oh, and it's awesome b/c I found this site that has links to Gavin singing other songs like, "Let's get it on," and it's awesome! I need to get a copy of this, it would kick so much ass on my "romantic times" cd
    ;). Yeah, I luvz the Gavin, he's awesome!

    So, I've been trying to get ready for the "K" thing tonight, but I somehow lost the button that I made for him:( I need to find it b/c I have to leave for work. I'm such dork head! So, yeah I showerd and shaved my legs and put on all this glittery powder stuff and my post work/pre movie clothes are in the dryer...I'm really looking forward to this, but I mean yawza do! I just hope he isn't weirded out by my gifts, I mean I think he'll think they're funny, I just don't know if he'll use my phone number now that i've given it to him! I mean I don't want it to mess up our friendship, but he knows I'm weird, so I think it'll be ok;). Anyway, I'm going to get online tonight/tomorrow morning no matter what happens and let you know what went down...I just hope she lets us watch 50 first dates tonight b/c if she doesn't..that'll just suck so much ass! Well, I need to go get ready to pick up J from school...we're gonna watch airheads, but my computer doesn't really have enough juice:(. Oh and I really wanna go buy the soundtrack to 50 b/c it has all these great 80's songs covered by ppl like 311 and Ziggy Marley, seroulsy it's awesome:). OK< well wish me luck with the whole "K" thing b/c I'm pretty sure I'm going to need it...badly! OK< well i'll talk to you in about 12 hours or so from now:)...hopefully i'll have a great story to tell:). Luvz...and remember>>>someday we'll all find true love (hopefully i've already found it:)~Sarah

    Current Mood: excited
    Current Music: "Love Song" ~ 311 (i'm totally digging this stuff:)
    1:11 am
    >>>Hey Ya!<
    So, yeah remember how I was telling you about this guy, Alex, that I met on the website? Well, it actually worked! He sent me a sweet little note on the yahoo personals site and so, I sent him a ridiculously long email last nigth and was so happy! But, I kept checking my email all day today and he hadn't sent anything back, so I was a little worried...but, I got and email back from him tonight around 11:30:). He asked me a few questions and it was just really sweet! He just seems like a really cool guy, but I mean I still don't know if anything will come of this. Hopefully we'll take it slow and just email back and fourth for a while and just get to know one another, i mean if he asked I'd give him my number right now (you'd think i'd learned my lesson by now), but I don't think he's that kind of guy. I stayed off AIM tonight though b/c I didn't want to talk to the weird old guy who's always talking about naked chicks, he's just annoying! Well, anyway that's all about that. Hopefully i'll continue to have new and updated Alex info:).

    So, yeah tomorrow is the day! I will be working tomorrow night and then watching the new Adam Sandler movie (hopefully) and giving "K" his b-day gift! So, I need to still go out tomorrow and buy him some Captn' waffers, but I can't find those things ANYWHERE!! So far I just got him the doll I made him, the little gnome and the button i made him and the card, of course. I know that i'm being weird about this whole thing, but if it works and he asks me to hang out...then that would just kick so much ass! Anyway, I have such a thing for him! Ok, well I guess i'll talk to you tomorrow night after work, the movie and the whole "K" cross your fingers and wish me luck:). Have a great night and remember>>>Someday we'll alal find true love:)~Sarah

    Current Mood: hopeful
    Current Music: "for you to notice" ~ dashboard confessional (hopefully this'll work with me and "K" b/c I just want to be wtih him SO much and I know it'll totally work if we just give it a shot:)
    Sunday, February 8th, 2004
    11:39 pm
    >>>boys, wth?<
    So, yeah I just don't understand males and sometimes i think that i never will. I mean I'm 22, you'd think that I would have figured something, but apparently not! It seems that every guy I try to start something with is insane or something! Remember that guy i was telling you about the other day...the 19 year old from onlline, well he's all like "when can we go out?" "you got any pics?", I blocked him right away and that was that...but then he emailed me and was like "how come every time I talk to you you sign off?"...ah, what the hell? I just don't get guys, well maybe I just don't get younger guys. I'm actually talking to a guy online right now who's 29, but he just keeps giving me play by plays of Jason X, which is a little destracting to me. I mean he seems nice enough, but he keeps talking about a naked chic in the movie hes' watching and that's just not something you talk to a girl about, you know? I mean maybe if it's a girl you know really well, but not someone you're talking to for the first time. And he just sent me a pic of some girl and was like "isn't she attractive?"...what the hell is with guys these days? Am I just supposed to sit here and take his shit? Are guys just not taught how to act around girls? I mean who the hell would do this? Guys=serioulsy screwed up! You know who would never do this? "D" would never do this b/c he is a gentleman and clearly this guy is, well, not. I think i need to stop talking to him soon, i mean i have class in the morning anyway and i'm getting sleepy and i just don't get it. I think I'm going to talk to "K" about my situation and maybe that could possible help our know?

    Anywhoo...I took the fam to see "Miracle" today and it was great and Eddie Cahill (me-ow;)...anyways "K" was in the lobby when we got out and oh, i just want him to make a move so badly, you know? He would never do this kind-of thing know well, i mean he talks about girls, but he and I know each other and i know he's just flirting with me when he does it anyway. I just don't get guys in general. Well, I guess that's all for now b/c i have class at 8 am and then field placement and more classes 'til after 7, so I'll talk to you on the flip side. Have a great night and remember, as hard as it is for me to actually belive>>>someday we'll all find true love:)~Sarah

    Current Mood: confused
    Current Music: "don't know why?" ~ nora jones, i don't know why i chose it, it just came to my head
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