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[Saturday
December 3rd, 2005 at 6:08pm] |
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mood |
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 bored |
] |
| [ |
music |
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hooray for humans // q and not u |
] |
I haven't written much of anything meaningful in quite a long time, and I think I'm overdue for some rambling.
But I can't make the words come.
I looked back on my old entries in this stupid rundown journal of mine and I realized how angsty I was.
"Oh em gee! I wanna cut myself! I'm so angsty! I write nothing but bull shit all day long!"
God. I was like THE ATTACK OF THE EMO every fucking entry.
Even when I was happy.
Pathetic.
And now I'm being angsty about my angst!
IRONY. <3
Man.
College is like....hard....and stuff.
Gosh now I remember why I stopped writing in this. It's because I don't have much to say. xD
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| Murr |
[Saturday
October 8th, 2005 at 2:06pm] |
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mood |
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 amused |
] |
I haven't written in here in a long time.
But I suppose now I'm finally old enough to have one. xD
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[Friday
July 9th, 2004 at 12:23pm] |
| [ |
mood |
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chipper |
] |
| [ |
music |
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sweet avenue - jets to brazil |
] |
*pokes journal*
It's alive....kinda...
I need to have a journal face off...
Where all my journals battle to the death.
And I keep only one and write in it everyday.
It'll be like...
SUNDAY SUNDAY SUNDAY!
See the Journals of Ashley battle...
TO THE DEATH.
See thhe LIVE, U, BLURTY, HIVE, TABULAS, DEAD, SCENE, WEEDWEB, GREATEST, AND INSANE journals battle....
TO THE DEATH.
SEE WHO WINS THIS SUNDAY SUNDAY SUNDAY!
Oh yeah. I own.
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[Saturday
April 17th, 2004 at 2:46pm] |
| [ |
mood |
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 lonely |
] |
Loneliness knows no bounds.
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[Saturday
March 20th, 2004 at 2:19pm] |
| [ |
mood |
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 blank |
] |
I should write in here more often.
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[Tuesday
March 9th, 2004 at 6:09pm] |
| [ |
mood |
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crushed |
] |
So this is it.
The person I care about most.
Best friend
Boyfriend of seven months.
He's leaving in 3 months.
Right after the school year is over.
He said that he doesn't think that a long distance relationship will work, so he wants to break it off when he moves.
I understand his reasoning though. He said that he's had past long distance relationships. Many. None of them ever worked. So that's that I suppose. He'll be leaving two months short of our 1 year anniversary.
I'm in pain. The most emotional pain I've ever been in.
I just want to wake up from this horrible night mare.
Please dear god just let me fucking wake up.
The happiest I've ever been is going to end in 3 months, and for me, it's kind of like being told I only have 3 more months to live...
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[Saturday
December 27th, 2003 at 7:49pm] |
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*sigh*
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[Wednesday
December 10th, 2003 at 11:46pm] |
| [ |
mood |
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 sick |
] |
| [ |
music |
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it's so you // the dismemberment plan |
] |
survey or whatever -
name - Ashley
favorite whatver - sdfkjte
what the fuck are you doing? - I hate surveys.
fuckit.
I feel bad crappy horrible SHITTY.
The end.
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[Thursday
November 27th, 2003 at 6:44pm] |
| [ |
mood |
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tired |
] |
| [ |
music |
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perfecting lonliness // jets to brazil |
] |
I spent all last night looking at old emails that I had recieved from him.
The single journal comment.
The one email he had sent to me which he didn't even know he had sent in the first place.
Pictures of the two of us on my wall.
My newly repaired charm braclet.
And I wonder how he's doing. But I know he's fine so I don't worry about it.
The person I am worried about is eating Thanksgiving dinner over at his sisters house. I still can't get over the fact that I can hurt him without even knowing it. I watch my words now but that's all I can do to help. I'm still wishing that I can do more even though I've been through this time and time again. I already know that there is nothing I can do. *sigh* Ooh well. All I want to do is help but I think I cause more porblems than good.
He told me not to worry but I think I dwell on things too much.
Thanksgiving was good. I guess that's all I have to say about that, but I still really miss Devin.
My mother found out that I'm in love with him.
She said she already knew.
For some reason I thought she'd react differently. Ooh well. I don't mind.
Alright. Time for more pie.
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| Je t'amie. |
[Saturday
November 22nd, 2003 at 10:07pm] |
| [ |
mood |
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discontent |
] |
| [ |
music |
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sweet avenue // jets to brazil |
] |
I'm tired and in pain and I can't get you out of my head.
Ahh. Gah. I normally wouldn't mind thinking about him so much but..
I just..don't want to think about this. This whole "oh by the way. I have a 99% chance of moving." but no big" thing. I just...ah.
My head is going to fucking explode.
He can't move. He just can't. I want to cry and scream at the same time. *sigh* I don't know what I would do without him. If he moves..I don't know how I'll deal. I just don't want him to leave. I just....don't want to loose him.
*sigh*
I don't know. As usual. I need sleep.
I'n getting off
Night.
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[Saturday
November 15th, 2003 at 7:08pm] |
| [ |
mood |
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bored |
] |
| [ |
music |
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wellington's wednesday // the weakerthans |
] |
Blahhh. I ended up buying some stuff for my room. Some pillows. A trash can. A mirror. I watched Finding Nemo again. And I messed with my other blurty's html for an hour and a half.
Fun filled day huh?
Also...
I'm thinking of getting my hair cut shorter. Like maybe....past sholder length...but thats a lot of hair. I might cry. Nngh. I dunno. Maybe layers too. I just want something new. Something fresh.
Something managable I guess.
Ooh well.
The great thing about hair is that it grows back so yeah. I think I'll live.
Hmm....I need some more pillows. I'm designating a corner in my room to be my : "chill out, lay down, relax, whatever," corner. That kind of thing requires lots of pillows. And a blanket to cover the pillows. So I'm off on a pillow hunt. Woohoo.
Ermm...more random-ness.
my leg hurts.
done.
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[Friday
November 14th, 2003 at 11:04pm] |
| [ |
mood |
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amused |
] |
| [ |
music |
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eleven to your seven // hey mercedes |
] |
Find your birth month on the list behind the cut. Cross out the things that do not apply to you. Bold the things that apply to you a lot. Leave alone the things that are sort of like you. Put it in a comment!
( dur dur dur )
AUGUST:
Loves to joke. Attractive. Suave and caring. Brave and fearless. Firm and has leadership qualities. Knows how to console others. Too generous and egoistic. Takes high pride of oneself. Thirsty for Likes praises. Extraordinary spirit. Easily angered. Angry when provoked. Easily jealous. Observant. Careful and cautious. Thinks quickly. Independent thoughts. Loves to lead and to be led. Loves to dream. Talented in the arts, music and defense. Sensitive but not petty. Poor resistance against illnesses. Learns to relax. Hasty and trusty. Romantic. Loving and caring. Loves to make friends.
HAHAHA. I'm Suave. Haha Ooh yeah And poor resistance again illnesses. I'm always freaking sick. 8sneeze* Muahahahaha.
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[Friday
November 14th, 2003 at 10:43pm] |
| [ |
mood |
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cold |
] |
| [ |
music |
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paper thin walls - modest mouse |
] |
Brrrrr. It's cold in here.
It was 38 degrees when I woke up this morning. Eesh. Too cold for me.
Ooh yeah. And i had to give Devin his jacket back. He said he didn't need it but his mom wanted himt o have it. i didn't mind...but now I'll have to find another comfy jaket to wear to school.
*sigh* I just keep looking I the picture I put on my wall of us. From my birthday. My new all time favorite picture. It makes me smile. ^.^
Errmm...Ooh yeah and I made brownies today. ^.^ Yummmm. So yeah. Come to my house and eat brownies.
Ook. Time for bed. It's too damn cold.
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| stole it |
[Wednesday
November 12th, 2003 at 5:52pm] |
| [ |
mood |
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pmsohmygodouch |
] |
| [ |
music |
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q and not u - kiss distincly american |
] |
( stole ittt )
Hmm....I'm all moved in to my new room. ^.^ Yay!
It's so big....and yeah...
Hmph.
Ook.
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[Monday
November 3rd, 2003 at 5:11pm] |
| [ |
mood |
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calm |
] |
| [ |
music |
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photobooth // deathcab for cutie |
] |
*sigh* I remember a time when words used to flow from these not so pretty fingers. Now its hard to say much of anything. I get an idea into my head and it leaves as fast as it came. As if to tease me. Ooh well. I guess I just lost it.
My pretty little head is all out of ideas...and I'm too tired to try and think of anymore.
It's time for me to think of other things...lke college in 2 years...what my major will be...how I can afford it.
Ooh well.
Time to do other things.
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[Tuesday
October 28th, 2003 at 9:56pm] |
| [ |
mood |
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sick |
] |
| [ |
music |
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radio // alkaline trio |
] |
I've said everything I've needed to say, and even somethings that I didn't.
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[Wednesday
October 22nd, 2003 at 9:43pm] |
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I hate blurty.
I wrote a nice long entry and it fucking didn't post.
Die die die die die.
I hate this stupid journal.
*kicks it*
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| *yawn* |
[Friday
October 10th, 2003 at 10:40pm] |
| [ |
mood |
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blah |
] |
Hmm. Well. There's nothing left to say really.
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[Friday
October 3rd, 2003 at 9:51pm] |
| [ |
mood |
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numb |
] |
New journalness.
Didn't take much effort.
Ooh well.
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