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Sophia's journal
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Life's Like That...
Human beings make wrong judgments all the time and yet we are allowed to drive killer machines at 100Km/h.
The only time that people will brush and floss their teeth diligently is before their appointment with the dentist.
Why are the catwalk supermodels sulking when they are wearing expensive fabulous couture?
Find an imperfect relationship so that you can improve it to perfection.
It is not the house that you live in that matters, it is the home that you are going to create together.
If life is suppose to be good, why do babies cry when they are born?
I love a guy that doesn't mind getting down on his knees, not for a marriage proposal but for fixing a sink.
The mind of a man works like a computer... if u are missing a 0 or 1, the system wouldn't work.
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> previous 20 entries
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Wednesday, March 23rd, 2011
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3:38 pm
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I realized as I age, I have a very controlled and perhaps even fussy sense of smell and taste. Foods that I previously love and even craved for, especially unhealthy ones, don’t interest me at all. Just now during lunch, all of them (8 of us) had cha quay tiao and I was the only one eating fish soup noodles. I remembered that when I was in school, I will eat this at least once a week but now thinking about it just puts me off. Even though someone explained that they have lots of vegetables and it’s a healthy version, when I think of the lard, the cockles and the sausages, I feel very put off.
I dunno if I’m feeling vain or wanting to go on a diet. But the truth is that, I have never really eaten anything to slim down. I mean if I am really on a diet, why am I still fat?! More than that, it is like an internal switch that was turned on recently and I began detesting anything that is not healthy. I can eat fish soup for three meals a day, totally skip out dried foods, drink no cold or sugary drinks and even skip desserts.
One very significant thing that I feel is that, I am constantly thirsty. No matter how much water I drink, sometimes up to 4L, I still feel thirsty. And eating non-soupy stuff just makes it worst. Sam just opened up our box of chocolates (which have been lying in the fridge untouched for 2 months) and every time I take a piece of it, I need to drink a whole glass of water just to clear the dryness in my mouth. I had coke and chips yesterday (too lazy to cook or buy food) and I drank even more water. In the end, I feel very bloated and irritated by the non-soupy stuff that I will just stop eating it. Perhaps that’s how I manage to control my diet.
That said, every time I go out lunch with my colleagues, I feel like the odd one out. I will either do vegetarian, fish soup or salad and I’m just weary they might think that I must this super vain bitch that has these ridiculous food controls. Well, believe me, I dunno what happened but nothing tastes better than simple bland food.
Even my favorite white chicken rice is being opted out.
current mood:  curious
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| Monday, March 21st, 2011
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1:45 pm
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Okay, I’m in my study mode again. Each time I change job, I tend to what to know more about it hence the researching starts. But then again, being a normal human being, I really don’t want to spend too much time and MONEY on it.
Here’s a summary of what I found:
NUS – 30 grand, 3 years to complete
PSB – 38 grand, 1.5 years to complete
Kaplan – 21 grand, 1.5 years to complete
I’m a little reluctant to check the others as I know they will be pricy and perhaps not recognized globally. This will be my Masters and I was thinking of doing some business administration, management or my hot favorite – communications.
The NUS one is quite interesting. It’s a fully research thesis meaning there will be no coursework or lectures. The trouble is you basically gotta write a whole freaking book in order to graduate. And this book cum research is what you will be facing for the next 3 years. I better find me something interesting to write about to last me that long. Just off my mind, here are some of my interests:
The age of virtual presence vs human interaction
The behavioral impact of the individual in the global village
Post-developmental Autism in young adults
Verbal communication in modern times
Sexual deviant aggregated by the explosion of internet pornography
Children and machines
iamaddictedtofacebook
Oh my, I am just getting really excited just thinking of my research topics! How I just gotta save up that 40 grand – hopefully.
current mood:  pleased
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| Monday, March 14th, 2011
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1:34 pm
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On a lighter note, I am really sick of people asking me why I don’t want to have children. Here are some of my future possible replies:
1.I’m sorry, I don’t understand the word ‘children’. I haven’t learn that in school however I do know another 4 letter C word that ends with T. Maybe I can explain that to you.
2.My husband has such a huge dick that it is impossible for him to penetrate me fully so forget about getting pregnant.
3.My eggs are not cracked yet.
4.I am just 15 this year! I’m underage!
5.It’s coming! I just planted a tree outside my house for the stork to place my baby in it.
6.I am predicating that the government is going to have a zero child policy so that I preparing for it.
7.I want to be humane. If my hubby and I ever breakup, I really don’t want to cut our kid into 2, pretty much like what we will do to our furniture. I don’t think half a kid is decent enough to bring out shopping.
8.I don’t believe in a no-return, no guarantee policy.
9.The cost structure in ROI is underway, I am still tabulating the figures.
10.If I get one dollar every time someone asks me this question, I will have enough savings to adopt a kid.
current mood: amused
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12:46 pm
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Seriously if anyone tells you that bringing up a kid is easy, you can ask them to go eat shit. I’m really not being rude. There is a clear difference between a dedicated care giver (some don’t have the fortunate circumstances to live with their parents, just guardians or care giver) and a couldn’t-be-bothered one.
I have always been curious why children take onto me. Sometimes I find children staring at me, I don’t usually freak out, I just give them a cheeky smile or some silly faces and they will start laughing. I kinda contribute that to my happy aura color. Okay I am a believer of aura and happy colors like blue and green attracts children since they are able to see them. Red means angry and kids don’t like that.
More than that, I think whenever I have an interaction with a kid, I will usually tune out whatever is happening around us and give my full concentration and attention. This greatly pleases the child but it means that within 2 hours, I will get very exhausted. I have gotten into these situations way too many times.
Whenever I get neighbors or friends coming to visit with their children, usually I will be talking to them. There was once where the parents are so busy checking out their flat information with Sam that I had to babysit 2 little girls. The older one got so hooked onto me that she started telling me their family habits and little whatnots. I didn’t think it was appropriate but I guess I’m her new best friend and she wants to share. Of course I will do the Aunty Sophia coaching to guide her.
Then yesterday, my mom and my niece came over to stay. I have no idea how my sis feeds her 4 year old daughter that she literally became a motor-mouth. My niece talked non-stop, asked way too much questions, chatting in an extremely high pitched tone – that by the end of the night, all I can hear is a soft buzzing in my ears. It was really exhausting attending to her. The worst part is that, she only wants to talk to me and no one else. So my mom and Sam were spared of the ‘destruction’.
Mom then told me that when they are back in my sis’s place, it is my sis that will suffer from it. She has it four-fold. My sis’s 2 kids, her husband and my mom – all want a piece of her. I can now imagine how tiring it will be and that every time her kids go to either mine or my dad’s house, that’s when she can really take a good rest. Poor thing.
The thing that I don’t understand is why her husband didn’t bother to bond with the children. I can’t expect Sam to bond with them as after-all they are not his kids but isn’t it logical that the father should play a part in parenting? People have praised me that I can take care of kids really well but I always assumed that if you live with them, naturally they will take a liking to you. But I was wrong. I have seen many cases of friends living with children not their own and they never bond with the child. It takes a lot of effort in order for a non parent to have a relationship with the kid, it takes even a lot more effort for parents to have a good relationship with their kid.
One more reason why I don’t want to have children – it is mentally exhausting.
current mood:  exhausted
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| Wednesday, March 2nd, 2011
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1:13 pm
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I just came back from a business trip to Bali. Despite most beliefs, there is no fun at all. Yes we have the perfect setting, the sun, the beach, the sand and the wonderful facilities of a four star hotel, it is all can see no touch. For 5.5 days, we have 10 to 12 hours of non-stop lectures, training sessions and round-table discussion. The only breaks were for lunch, morning and noon teas, which everything placed in the mouth have to go straight into the stomach without much chewing. I have never swallowed that much food in my entire life. By the fourth day, I have a faux choke in my mouth which I thought was caused by a grilled prawn leg. Causing me much dismay, I tried swallowing (yes, even more mouth to stomach action) rice and big gulps of soup, it didn’t help ease the pain. In the end I tried to vomit the faux choke then the pain moved from one side of the throat to the other. It was then I realized that my neck muscles were sore from forcing big chunks of food down and long periods of staring up into the projected screen. Was Bali fun? Some innocence people ask, fuck hell no!
We did have some time ‘alone’ for dinner. Sadly I didn’t have a room to myself or I would have spent most of my evenings lazing in the huge bath tub with my book. I was very determined to finish up reading so that I can start on another book but it was impossible. Plus my roomie was constantly busy with her work, I guessed that I need to leave her alone in the room to catch up. Foolishly I went out with the gang for dinner every night and end up coming back around 10pm. So after shower and some chit chats, the earliest to sleep is about 11:30pm. The next day we need to get up by 6am. Actually I didn’t have to but my roomie takes a while to get prepared and somehow her alarm just couldn’t function for the early part of the week.
I was plastered with hordes of tiny pimples and break outs and people were still commenting that my skin was good. I must really thank the bb cream from vichy for a flawless coverup! I didn’t have time to do any of my beauty regime and insufficient sleep is the biggest cause of my blemishes. Now, I’m constantly having rescue creams and balms for my suffering skin.
Did I mention that I was also having my period? It just makes everything so much more ‘fun’. Coffee is a must, 3 times more than the usual to keep me awake. It doesn’t help that the ballrooms are always cold, and that I was just recovering from a nasty attack of bronchitis the week before, I am just happy that I am alive.
But I think I have learned quite a lot. Know all my counterparts from different counties and get to know some really cool people. Boy was I surprised when a lady friend of mine said that a few men find me really hot. I guess it must the maxi dress that I wore during the gala dinner. But seriously I have no mood for romance or stupid chitchats. I was bothered by the faux choke. Not surprisingly after much booze, the whole gang decided to bring it to the next level, continual partying at Kuta. It’s madness, I felt obliged since my boss keep asking us along, promising me that I will be safety back to the hotel by 1:30am. We got back 1 hour late and I slept at 3am. After being away from all the dancing scene, it felt weird to have someone wiggling beside you.
I’m still trying to recuperate from the insufficient sleep and painful neck and shoulder aches. Maybe it’s a clear sign that I am indeed getting old.
current mood:  sore
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| Monday, January 24th, 2011
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12:43 am - FB Fury
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I hate people that put up statuses in fb and refuse to explain what the fuck it is. Like ‘That’s it, this is it man.’ So naturally when someone asks in all good natured way, the fucker simply just replies ‘Nothing, it’s personal.’ If it’s personal, don’t fucking log onto fb lah!
What’s with those that keep on stating where they are? ‘XX and YY’s Home’ using some tracking system. With the usual status of ‘I’m home and really tired’ like every fucking day? Why don’t you also write ‘I’m brushing my teeth... with guess what, a toothbrush at XX and YY’s Home!’ If you continue to state what time you reach home, I will go burglar your place when you are not.
I know everybody loves children, especially your own. But I am utterly sick of seeing pics and pics of your kid and he/she is not even cute!!! No offense, even eating too much caviar can be nauseating.
Declaration of your pregnancy is such a turn off. I don’t want to know when you fuck and when the sperm meets the egg and when the cells turn into something bigger – ON A DAILY BASIS. Like the Taiwanese drama ‘Love’, I dreaded it and I also would like to delete your post.
Guess what bitch, all your photos look the same.
Try and say something smart once in a while like ‘I use my left foot more than my right foot today!’
current mood:  nauseated
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| Tuesday, December 21st, 2010
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10:33 am - A private conversation
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Me: Oh my god, I just felt that. What is going on heart?
Heart: Not my fault! Brain was thinking about some silly things and he got me all frightened.
Brain: Hey don’t blame me, heart is always sensitive about such things. Wuss.
Heart: What the fuck? Talk about yourself! You mindless heartless idiot. All you do all day is think and get worried and panic but guess who is feeling all the emotions? ME! It’s fucking me in the middle of it all!! When you get sad, I miss a heartbeat. When you are happy, I beat twice as hard. When you get all emo, I beat so loud, ears could hear it!
Brain: Blab blab blab…
Me: OK you two! Stop it! Brain, you need to chill brother! And not make the rest of us in cold sweat everytime you think way out of your league. And heart, does it kill you to have some sensitivity around here? You are not freaking 60 years old and you will not have an attack! So please, just let it go.
Ears: I heard all that.
current mood:  nervous
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| Saturday, September 25th, 2010
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1:18 pm
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It has been a month into the new job. Most of my friends keep asking me if I enjoyed it. Well, I am slowly getting used to it. As what my boss initially told me, time management skill is essential. I was still laughing at him thinking – oh come on, it can’t be that bad right? I don’t slack (much) at work anyway.
I am so wrong.
In a typical week, I get at least 2 brand appointments, lasting 4 hours each so 1 day is gone. Next are meetings. I use to like meetings as things get done but here, meetings are really a waste of time. I could have easily written half an article with the time spent. There goes another half day. Then we need to make loads of phone calls to either SME (subject matter expert), more brand people, article models (usually real people, friends of friends) and what-nots. The actual time to sit and pen is very very rare. If I get a whole day in the office, without disturbances, I am so damn happy. So in a way, everything is on double the speed.
Before, I use to surf the web for fun and visit my facebook account to check out the latest happenings or play some games. Now, when I visit facebook, it’s for work and I go to google’s main page at least 30 times a day. I flip magazines looking for information and I MSN looking for volunteers. Everything they didn’t allow you to do in the corporate environment, it is part of the job here.
The perks are maybe the free skincare you get. But once you get them, you are suppose to use them mindfully and note down how effective or what ingredients in them. It is no longer just applying on your face. Then we have treatments from spas and facials. Yesterday I attended a new light treatment that cost $400 and the therapist asked if I fell asleep while doing the mask. She must be joking. I’m working for christ’s sake. This morning, I had to constantly looking for improvements so that I will know what to write for my article. When I watch fashion or entertainment television, I am constantly looking for tips or trends so that it can be incorporated into the article. For once, I find that handling escalations not that bad after all.
Next week I have yet another facial and perhaps a slimming appointment. I’m wondering if there’s any under the knife appointment. I don’t mind trying out dermal fillers...
current mood:  stressed
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| Thursday, July 29th, 2010
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1:44 pm
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It was unbelievable painful. Yesterday was probably the most pissed off yet surprisingly serene day I ever had. Yes, 2 in 1 combo, fucking insane. Now that I’m still thinking about it, I am lucky that I am so brave and have my grandmother’s super high tolerance for pain. For a fact both my parents are pretty queasy when it comes to the topic of pain. In fact most people would but for me, I can tolerate it and to a certain extent, I get a highness from it. Yes, strange but this highness is not like on drugs, rather you just get so numb, nothing hurts you anymore.
Yesterday I made my appointment with my gynae. About 3 years ago, I had an IUD inserted so it is time to take it out. I remember clearly the last time the doc told me that I will be put under so I didn’t bother to schedule it during my period. The whole logic to it is that during period, the cervix will open up naturally to allow blood flow. During this time, the insertion will be done with ease especially for women that have not given birth. So if I am going under, I don’t need to care about the dilation and the pain right? So bloody wrong.
He said it wouldn’t hurt taking it out, I kinda made him promised. Well, it really didn’t hurt when he took it out. There was a small biting feeling for a millisecond and that’s it. I was feeling relived that everything was quick. In happy spirits he told me that putting a new one will only take not more than a few minutes. I believed him as the last time round, it really was very fast and relatively painless.
Then he proceeded to insert a new IUD. It happened, he was fiddling it for a while, and I start to get painful. Then he said as I haven’t given birth, my cervix is clearly tighter. I told him that it is not really straight, I know since I use tampons. He agreed and was doing his best to get it in. After much vocalization of the pain that I am feeling, he told the nurse ‘I need a number 4 dilator.’ Okay, maybe that will help, 2 minutes into it ‘I need a number 5 dilator.’ Then he grumbled that I should come during my period so that it will be easier for me. He asked it if took this long the last time, I said no. He questioned his own skills and told the nurse ‘Okay, I need the metal dilator’. WHAT THE FUCK?
‘Since you are here, I need to fit it for you right? Can’t make you come again.’ I was literally humming with pain. Yes, when in extreme pain (I just realised it yesterday), I will start humming. Little bits of sound apparently took a little bit of pain away. ‘I am really in pain, can I have some painkillers please? Anything will do.’ I begged. ‘It’s too late, it will take time to kick it, just bear with it, a while more okay?’ The next thing I know, it was so unbearable I shouted ‘Oh fuck! Oops, sorry.’
I didn’t feel sorry, I really didn’t but I just couldn’t bear it anymore. I grabbed the nurse’s arm by mistake but couldn’t really hold onto it fearing that I might rupture her blood vessels. I found the side bar of the table to grab and super grab I did. I can feel my own body shiver with pain and from the cold. My toes turned numb and my hands started shaking. All these while, I took at the ceiling and hope that I can be rescued. It feels like a cat with super sharp craws is scratching my insides with such fury to get out. All these happened, without any analgesic whatsoever.
When it almost came to the end, I was so high from the pain that I felt delusional and even though he was talking to me, I hear nothing. I could only nod my head with a poker face but I hear nothing at all. When he left the room, I looked at the nurse and told her that it is really very painful. She said that she could tell by how the doctor literally forced the thing in me. As I retreat to the resting area, I saw my white pale reflection on the mirror and had a shock. I looked like I saw a ghost, my own ghost.
He didn’t prescribe me any painkillers after that. The pain afterwards lasted for while and I knew without painkillers, it will last even longer. Thankfully the nurse gave me some (I popped 3 hopeful for an immediate effect) but it took at least 30 mins to kick into action. I was waiting on the sofa for Sam all these while, of course still in pain.
When I finally leave the place, I told the nurse how brave I am. She totally agreed with me and was somewhat embarrassed of how the doctor treated me. I either feel like I have been gang raped by a bunch of medical equipment or alien probed. The next schedule, I better insist on proper painkillers.
current mood:  uncomfortable
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| Wednesday, July 28th, 2010
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2:34 am
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Lesson number 2 from the Accidental Editor – try not to have too much close friends as your subject. I called a photographer today asking for his time and studio availability and he asked me ‘the models are your friends?’ I know what he is implying, I said ‘no, they just need more time for styling and makeup hence we decided to move it to the weekend.’ There you go, I’ve been exposed as a newbie to this industry. Apparently learning the hard way (it is the best way to learn things) that having your friends as your subject means that you have to constantly blend into their requests and time schedule. Having 1 subject is not a problem but 3 becomes the headache. We also have cost cutting in the publishing line hence having all 3 subjects taking the photo shoot at the same time means that we can save money. Even the photographer agreed with me.
So for my first issue of the magazine, I will give in to the best that I can then I will scream and burst and yell stop. I hope that everything goes well before I kill everybody around me. Then I realised that’s how editors get their stereotype of being mean and controlling. Personally I am a control freak and I need to let go of certain things on purpose so that I don’t stress myself out, having this job encourages me to let the beast out so that the magazine can be published on time. I’m just counting down the days that I unleash my fire. Being nice is sometimes not worth it.
On other news, I went shopping with Jaime and incidentally (actually quite on purpose) visited several makeup stores. By now I know products for feet so well I was literally recommending Jaime what cream and scrub to use. And she was happily splashing samples on her hand testing them for the smell and texture. I so gotta drag her out during my product research. Sam was quite amazed how I can get the sales person to personally walk me around the store showing me all the products. I just told him that my name card is very worthy and priceless.
And finally, I succumb to make wedding arrangements finally. We took a 1 hour walk down the wedding street near our house, I can’t remember the street name but it is famous for all the bridal shops along the stretch. We just visited 2 shops as I was getting really pissed from wearing the clothes. The lace and some plastic hooks or something in some of the dresses were hurting me. Some dresses have girdles in them and the plastic pieces stick out so when you wear it, it literally pokes you in the rib cage. Then some of the laces are extremely uncomfortable and I had ‘burn’ marks from wearing it. I simply cannot understand the torturing wedding dress and the bride is suppose to smile throughout the whole show. In the end, I opted for a simple cheongsam, not heavy and definitely not caged up. It wasn't difficult to make the choice, we committed ourselves at the second shop that we visited. The people in the shop could sense that we really couldn’t be much bothered with the whole wedding pansy.
Then on Sunday, much to Sam’s mom’s insistence, we finally will be having the meet-the-parents session. This according to her is necessary where both families sit and discuss about dowry. How many tables to give, how much money to give, cakes and other wedding stuff will be discussed. I have warned my father to be decisive as Sam’s parents can never make up their minds. But sensing the possibility of not make any decisions, I made the call on the number of tables that Sam’s parents should be giving to my dad. Thankfully both sides agreed. Sam was yelling to his mom about it earlier and passed me the failed mission to accomplish. It wasn’t that hard if I keep jumping off the topic with his mom, I have my way around her and she knows my weakness too. I will be the only one that she will pull and talk as the rest of the family will just dismiss her. Sometimes I try my best not to catch her sight or sit near her so that I can escape from her repetitive chatter. She’s a nice person in generally but like all overly caring mothers, they are quite the vocal martyr. Their lives devoted to the family but due to being overbearing, sometimes they are not appreciated. I do pity her sometimes but I can only have an heart to heart talk once I settle the wedding otherwise she will come bug me again on why I don’t want to wear the usual white gown, why I don’t want to take wedding pictures and why I don’t have a photomontage. I have explained it to her 3 million times but she will take every opportunity to ask me again. A very good salesman but never sold anything in his whole life.
It’s 2:33am, my body is tired but my brain is still very active. I might need to do some mediation to help me to sleep later.
current mood:  pessimistic
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| Thursday, July 22nd, 2010
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11:33 pm
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Alright, so I had my product launch event. It was Bvlgari men perfume. Initially I thought it was for women, but never mind that. I have kicked started my ‘glamorous’ life if you can call it that. Special invitations to product launches and events hosted by prestigious brands, they are afterall those that can afford it. You don’t see Olay doing events, or do they?
Anyway, my director was supposed to come along but it is his birthday and I called him in the afternoon to tell him that I can go alone. I am pretty used to going to events without someone close but at least there will be a familiar face that I can recognize. For my first event, I made the first mistake of an editor – Never go to events alone unless if you are gutsy to talk to a stranger and look as if you are having a great time.
And so I did talk to a stranger, in fact 2 strangers beside me. I didn’t want to look like an idiot sitting there and in fact there is a girl sitting just opposite me, holding her bag and her drink and basically just sulk. So unglamorous I tell you. Luckily for me, the little girl beside me was pretty much ‘alone’ too, the guy next to her was her friend’s friend and they only met for the first time. I could tell that she was having some difficulties clicking with a much older man so I was the better option to stick to. We really had a good time, laughing and sharing stories. I thought she looked snobbish but surprisingly she wasn’t. She has that Dawn Yang look, long hair, petite, very pretty and looked very upper class. She’s from Vietnam and currently studying in Australia.
I should have brought Sam with me actually so that I could at least look ‘engaged in a conversation’. The music was too loud anyway for any decent conversation and we were all like waiting for something to happen. I was expecting a press conference where a celebrity talks about the product or a catwalk show but nooo, all we had were 3 booths with gorgeous looking ang mo models telling us about the top notes of the perfume. I didn’t bother visit the other 2 booths as I wanted to quickly find a sit and plant myself down. My director did say that usually the event doesn’t start early but 1.5 hours into it, there is no show at all. There’s when I decided to leave with my gift, a full size bottle of the latest scent, for men. Sam is rather happy with what I scored for him. I also got a silk Bvlgari print hankie and 2 Bvlgari logo wet tissues. I didn’t want to use the tissues as there will definitely be some perfume stained on it. Well, I took the wet tissues from the toilet. I’m still very much the cheesy Singaporean. Heh.
Generally the crowd belongs to the attractive people. I see lots of models walking around, some men in suits which I believe could be the corporate people in Bvlgari, some arty farty people, some office wear ladies, most smart causal gown women and a whole lot of ang mo. Maybe they are the ones that can afford the perfume. The alcohol was on free flow, plenty of finger food and pasta in the end. I didn’t eat any food as I was thinking a lot about my article so nothing could go it. There wasn’t any other non alcoholic drink (I didn’t bother asking) and I took a Cosmopolitan. I think they were publicising Grey Goose but I just couldn’t have another cocktail on an empty stomach. Sam was a little disappointed that he wasn’t there as he very much would like to try Grey Goose cocktails. He’s a little sick, perhaps next time if there’s another invite for 2 and nobody else in the editorial team is going, I will drag him along. I did inform him that he might just need to get a decent jacket.
Speaking of which, I am just totally clueless and dress-less. I was in pants and a nice black top today but it just gotta get more than that. I need to totally revamp my corporate wardrobe and start getting funky casual clothes. I need dinner/event wear too. Then next comes the bags, I should get more decent bags to accompany the outfit. This is such a headache for me I tell you.
As a beauty editor, you are suppose to look like the editor meaning fashionable, quirky, pretty and cool. I mean generally I believe that I do look good but you just got to push the mark up now. Seeing how people have a perception of you. I mean afterall I do represent the magazine for christ’s sake. Then I had my photo taken by a cameraman for this magazine called Designare or something. Took my name down and told him that I am also from a magazine. He spoke to me in typical cameraman language and walked away. I have no idea what he just said. Then the guy beside told me that it is alright since it is not a magazine launch but then again you will never know. The guy beside is a design consultant with a very funky card. He looked really tired as most artists would and was trying very hard to have a conversation with us girls. Half way through he prompted to leave and it was just about time. When I collected my gift, half of it was gone meaning the crowd has already started to shift.
So much so for my first event experience, I think I should start changing my blog to – Life of an Accidental Editor. I still cannot believe my new job.
current mood:  lethargic
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| Tuesday, July 13th, 2010
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11:53 am
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11:40 am
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I am hyperventilating, either from too much salt in my eggs or I’m super hyped up about my first event. I really don’t know what the industry jargon for such events is. Media launch perhaps? Anyway, it is due next week and its Bvlgari fragrance. I’m gasping for air now as I am totally clueless. I guess this is how every editor/writer feels the first time they attend their event too. What am I suppose to wear? Am I allowed to bring a partner? Am I going to be alone? As far as I’m concerned, my writer and creative director cannot make it hence I’m tasked to go even if I have yet to officially start work. So what now?
This job is sometimes killing me. Not about the work but rather about the appearance. It seems like everyone has an opinion of how an editor should look like. It is worst if I’m the beauty editor, I am supposed to know everything beautiful. It’s really a hard title to carry. Just last week, an ex colleague brought some clothes to my place as her friend is selling them online. They wanted to show me the clothes as they want to know what an editor thinks of them. Then they launched the website and asked for my honest opinion too on how the photo shoot turned out. I can be very very critical and syndical but I stopped myself. Using safer general comments as ‘it’s nice but looks weird’ and ‘perhaps it’s her first launch, she needs to determine how she wants her label to be’, it helps me to ease the trouble of saying something really horrible. Saying bad things is an art I tell you.
Amongst ‘editing’ clothes, I kinda also got myself ready for the role. I bought my first laptop. I have never really owned a laptop, it was all issued by the company so my first purchase was rather emotional. I was this near to hugging it to sleep. Then I got some clothes. Funky clothes that I think will be suitable for my work. I was contemplating if I should throw away all my business suits but they might just come in handy one day. I also got some bags but most of them are bought way before I got my new job. Except the Prada bag, but that’s a gift from Sam which means, I have to get more bags! Yay!
And I started jogging. I don’t want to look fat on pictures. But most importantly I want to excel in my work, and not be the pretty vase. Well, except during media launches. Damn, I really don’t know what to wear!!!
current mood: anxious
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(3 comments | comment on this)
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| Tuesday, June 15th, 2010
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4:59 pm
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I am about to make a life altering decision in about 15 minutes time. I’m waiting for my inbox to clear up before I can officially send my resignation letter. This is for the 2nd time ever in my whole career. I wouldn’t mention that I had a fantastic IT career for I never felt like I fitted it without all the necessary qualifications or fancy certifications. Many times I come across complete idiots with all the right stuff on their resume that couldn’t even conduct a decent conversation in front of a client or draft an email enough to say no to a new process implementation. I find that I am adapt in that management aspect but desperately lacking in that technical knowledge which dips my self worth to rock bottom low. I make it up by being very efficient and productivity but that has its limits.
So recently I was presented with an opportunity of a lifetime. Not only is this gracious person willing to be my mentor, he has agreed to show me the ropes and even ‘templates’ to get the work down. I am highly pleased until I realised the monetary sacrifices that comes with it being an amateur to the publishing industry. Yes, the textbooks can only teach you that much, a lot of it comes from your own diligence and hard work. This is sometime that I have been trying to get and it seems like I have lost my groove.
I dislike the feeling of helplessness. The current job is riding me through the hours and days and I work on Mondays so that I can rest on Saturday. It becomes meaningless and I feel tired from the never ending operational issues. I have no support from management and sometimes I feel like I am almost redundant since nobody cares much about the daily operations. It has become mundane and painful to come to work. What little inspiration I have is that monthly fat pay that comes rolling it but I know it will never be able to make me happy in the long run.
I feel like going through a physical cleansing to rejuvenate my mind and my soul. I have been slave to my job for the past half a year and enough is enough. I who do not complaint but will instead make the move will now proceed on with my plan. I would rather take lesser pay but with more job satisfaction that I will probably have in my entire job life.
Today will be the day that I say goodbye to my previous life and start leading a life that I can be proud of. Today is the day I can be recognized as a beauty editor aka full time writer.
current mood:  thankful
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(comment on this)
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| Thursday, May 20th, 2010
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2:55 pm
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Naz says (2:42 PM):
wooo careful ok
it might be one of the contributing factors to ur joint prob
Sophia Yip says (2:44 PM):
hmm.. rumour-tease-sem
lol
Naz says (2:45 PM):
hahahaha rheumatism?
Sophia Yip says (2:45 PM):
yaaa
dunno how to spell
Naz says (2:46 PM):
hahaahah that wet shit when u get tummy ache from eating bad stuff..how to spell it?
Sophia Yip says (2:47 PM):
die-real
LOL!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Sophia Yip says (2:48 PM):
omg...i should never have a kid
Naz says (2:53 PM):
hahahaa until now i always get it wrong also
Diaorrhea
hahaha
Naz says (2:54 PM):
then eye infection?
ahaha imagine if u are a doc
haah no wonder
Sophia Yip says (2:54 PM):
si-ba-giam
Naz says (2:54 PM):
no wonder docs have crap handwriting to mask their inability to spell those terms
Sophia Yip says (2:54 PM):
LOL!!! oh ya!! the imfamous doctor's handwritting!!
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(comment on this)
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| Thursday, May 13th, 2010
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4:49 pm
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Christ, I’m building up a Coach collection! I just got my third coach bag this year and eyeing on other designs. I have a to-stock-up kinda feeling in case if I lose my job or something like that. It’s weird. I believe that if I have no income, I can still sell them away if needed. It’s madness. Rather than enjoying the bags, I keep thinking of getting more to stock up just-in-case.
This job that I am having now gives no security. I am waiting for the final call from management that the client decides to pull the plug and all of us will be jobless. There are few lucky ones that can go back to India to continue their previous role but for those hired specially will be dismissed. Basically all the people in the service desk including me are hired specifically so we will have no where to go. Even if they were to offer me another role in India, I don’t think I will want to go there to work.
Somehow or rather I keep thinking that all the money from my pay has to be kept as reserved just-in-case again. All my savings are gone into the renovation and I am slowly building my capital again. It is a long and tedious process but it is necessary. Having savings makes one feel safer for rainy days. My parents never have any savings and they are living by the cent. This really irritates me and I swear at a very young age that I will not repeat what they did. I want to be financially independent and financially sound with the least possible debt.
Thankfully Sam has the same mantra. We keep our debts to the bare minimum, basically just housing and car loan. We pay everything by cash and pay our credit cards on time, in short we strive to have good credit history. Owning debts is one of the worst feelings in the world, much worst than breaking up with a loved one.
Manically, I have been sourcing other source of income too. Sad to say we both don’t have much talent or hobby that generates money. Investment it seems is the only avenue and that means we need to have capital. So saving is our only way and at times, it becomes too slow to wait for returns. There are no foolproof plans out there to make quick bucks, hell we don’t even believe in the lottery. Non risk takers like us only have one advantage, peace of mind and we really liked that.
Perhaps I should write professionally and get paid. But magazines and newspaper always want experienced writers as they wouldn’t bother to go through all my spelling and grammar mistakes. Anyway, we just have to take each step as it goes and keep our feet planted firmly on the ground 23 stories high.
current mood: indifferent
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| Friday, April 30th, 2010
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1:50 pm
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I think I might have said it like a gazillion times. Sometimes I wonder what it will be like with plenty of friends around and even a child around. It doesn’t mean that I need company, it is just that when I see pictures of friends with their friends going out for gatherings and trips, I feel like I am missing something. When I see them with their kids having fun, I feel like I am missing something.
And when I am really in the situation where I do hang out with my friends, I simply just can’t stop looking at the watch to see what time I can go home. Or when I have the kids over, I really wish that they can leave soon so that I can have some peace and quiet in the house.
I guess humans are like that. They always want something that they can’t have.
So about going on trips with friends, I have my fair share of overnight trips. Not all not pleasant but none that I can remember fondly. The best mass trips that I can remember are those taken with family. I remember clearly when I was younger, my father’s family will organize regular trips where the whole family will attend. We will drive to Malaysia, go on cruises and have chalet nights. It ended abruptly as everyone got busier and busier especially when the family business started.
The last trip I remember with my extended family was to Perth to visit another of our relative. It was memorable and that’s when our cousin relationship grew closer. And for the longest time I didn’t have that family feeling at all, even reunion dinner is marred by pretentious talk and meek laughter.
But it all changed some 3 years ago. Sam’s sister planned for a sudden family cruise trip and we all decided to just go. It was the first time for everyone of us and having separate rooms will make it all so easy. It was too short a trip to really recall good moments together but we had nothing to complaint.
The following year, it was Sam and my turn to organize. We got a good deal for a huge suite in Phuket and I guess that’s when the magic happened. We were all sharing the 2 rooms apartment but we had enough sleeping area for 8 adults and 3 children. It was a wonderful 4 days together with endless laughter and tiny gossips. We blended in really well and were sad when we had to return. I dare say it was one of the best ever trip and we are dead sure that we will have it every year.
So this year it will be Sam’s brother’s turn to organize. We got ourselves a private villa in Bali with our own pool and staff. I am so looking forward to all the fun and laughter and sun tanning! It is tough to get nice in-law family, it’s a miracle to get all 9 of them.
current mood: thankful
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| Wednesday, April 28th, 2010
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2:02 pm
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Sometimes these ang moh really bo liao. Little bit of things that they do they will make loud loud noise machaim damn suk like that. I don’t know lah, they like want to fulfil their lives with names and title. So I also don’t want to lose out, here are a few titles that I thought of for me lah:
- Humourist – I make people laugh with my jokes, behaviour and facebook taglines.
- Corporate Writer – I write emails daily in a corporate environment.
- Registered Lover – Since I am legally married, I’m registered with the government.
- Google Expert – I am damn good at searching nonsense with Google.
- Music Player – I play music on radios and MP3 players.
- English Master – I speak English really well.
- Professional Organizer – I am highly efficient at organizing things even at home.
I believe there is more but I need to rest my highly developed brain now.
current mood:  creative
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(comment on this)
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| Tuesday, April 20th, 2010
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1:19 pm
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Sophia Yip says (1:07 PM):
help!!
Sophia Yip says (1:08 PM):
can u send me back???
my pants broke!!!
at my arse area!!!!!!
shit!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Sam Wang says (1:08 PM):
HAHAHAHA
in the off. leaving soon
take about 30-45min
Sophia Yip says (1:09 PM):
after 2pm
no..
come during then
Sam Wang says (1:09 PM):
ok
wil try
Sophia Yip says (1:09 PM):
1:30pm u will be here??
or 1:45pm?
Sam Wang says (1:10 PM):
no
Sophia Yip says (1:10 PM):
my concall will finish
2pm?
Sam Wang says (1:10 PM):
my veh at r8
try
Sophia Yip says (1:10 PM):
shitttttttttttttttttttttt
i wanna cry
Sam Wang says (1:10 PM):
dun worry
Today's a good day to die of shame.
current mood:  embarrassed
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(comment on this)
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| Monday, April 19th, 2010
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1:03 pm
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I’m in a super foul mood today so I’m allowed to grumble. I have been having dreams every night for the past 2 weeks and I wake up super groggy and tired. It irritates the hell out of me. Today, as usual I woke up feeling irritating due to some stupid dream that I was in an elite group doing some training sessions. I think I’m either selected to rule the world or be a sniper killer. I would prefer being a sniper so that I can shoot people that I don’t like. Heh.
Then, like just on clue where things couldn’t get any better, the apartment upstairs starts pounding madly. It’s like I can hear my heartbeat out of my chest. It just keeps on pounding until I left my house. Renovation is STILL happening in the estate and it is something that you can never get used it. It will drive you nuts just hearing 5 minutes of the constant pounding.
I left the house, took the lift down and came up again as I forgot my employee pass. When I left for good, I still have a nagging feeling that I forgot something. It was only when I was in the office that I realised that I forgot my water bottle. Shitty day.
Then during the cab ride, I almost puked as I was damn hungry. Shitty day.
When I stepped into the office, this guy (which I really tried to like but couldn’t) starting blabbering some stupid nonsense in front of me and my boss. My boss was calm enough to handle his nonsense but I can feel that he was irritated too. Then he started talking to me, totally ignoring the idiot.
This idiot I tell you, is really an idiot. He can’t eat pork but every time someone gives him food, he will eat it without asking. When he has eaten it, he will then ask what he has eaten. It just happened again when a nice lady let him try some pasta that she made. The idiot just slurped up everything and asked what he has eaten. When realising that it is pork, he will make a very pathetic look like we’ve raped him or something that he can’t eat pork.
He did it to me once and I can’t believe that he still eats without asking. He is fucking making whoever is feeding him guilty. Such an idiot! Maybe one day I should feed him pork knuckles and tell him that it’s mutton.
I’m super depressed today and I don’t know why. PMS is the only reason that I can bring up. I hope it ends soon or I will shoot someone dead and be very happy about it. The idiot will be my first target.
current mood:  pissed off
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