solitarysunshine's Blurty

echoed pain
geez...why am i so dumb? okay first of all i havent talked to dave in like two months...and just for some back ground for my own piece of mind dave and i met at chilis' the resturaunt in july...he gave me his number as i left the resturaunt and i had secretly left mine on the table...we started hanging out the next day and remained together until the middle of august...so for almost a month i was loyal to him...kinda and was worried incessently about who he was with...what he was doing...dave is good lookin' and he totally knows it...but ya anywho...so he stopped talking to me and responding to my calls in late august...then last sunday out of no where he calls...i don't understand...when i'm with him i feel so important...so valid...so big...but when he doesn't call...when i don't see him for days...my mind goes nuts....and i've never done this before...i'm not the type to date...i don't like the committment or the hours that go into a relationship...cuz frankly i dont' have time...but with him... i would...i 'd be perfectly satisfied just chillin' with him constantly...isn't that totally fcked up? i dont understand..and whats worst is that i know i shouldn't go "back to him" but i can't help it...how sick is that...it's like the wife who swears she fell down...or ran into a door...i can't escape him...he doesn't hit me...but geez...he can be kinda physical...i don't know...i'm so confused...and friends are now help...they all hate him...tell me i'm stupid for going back to him and that if i get hurt...well then i deserve it...so sunday we hung out for like five hours...kissed a ton..and then he told me alll this crap bout how he really missed me and how much he likes me...then that i should call him ...so monday i did...and nothin'...wednesday i called and left a message...and nothin...what the hell??? any advice??? be kind please???